PMS and PC's.

Author: Fayth
Summary: Willow gets fed up with women's troubles and gives Giles and Spike some lessons.
Rating: PG- pg13
Feedback: wanted lots thereof
Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, except the pain Willow was in and Boy did I not exaggerate! Thanks to I honestly did not know you existed until I typed it in.
And also not knowing you existed!


The pain was astronomical, it felt like her insides were being scraped away. Which was what was actually happening now that she thought about it.
"I hate this!" Willow growled into the darkened living room as she clutched the pillow closer to her aching midsection. "Damn I hate this!"

She was sat on the sofa with a bar of chocolate and a cup of tea watching horror movies and trying not to cry every time a searing cramp grasped her. She wanted nothing more than to sink into oblivion and never wake up.

Suddenly the phone rang startling her out of her musings.

"What?" She growled into the receiver.

"Uh Willow, its Giles. I need you here to do something for me."

"Fine!" she spat and slammed the phone down "I hate men."


Giles stared at the dead receiver.

"Well is she coming over?"  Spike said trying to hide his eagerness.

"I- I think so, she was slightly abrupt, I do hope she is OK." Giles sighed and cleaned his glasses "I can't believe I've mislaid that book, it has some important information in it, she wouldn't need to come over if I could find it."

"Yeah bad luck that." Spike said as he pushed a large black volume further under his chair with his heel.


Ten minutes later Willow stormed in and slammed the door.

"Well?" she demanded "What's the big emergency?"

Both Spike and Giles stared at the fiery redhead, albeit for different reasons.

Bloody hell, she's gorgeous when she's angry. Spike grinned.

Oh dear Lord. Thought Giles.

"Well?" She threw her bag on the floor and stomped over to the two men and tried to ignore the fascinated look on Spike's face.

"What's got your knickers in a twist?" Spike said knowing full well it would piss her off. As she stomped closer he caught the unmistakable scent of blood and his grin expanded as he realised why she was so irate.

"Oh time of the month is it?"

Her face flamed as she realised he knew. Giles began to sputter-

"O-Oh I wasn't aware of that."

"You obviously missed the advert in the paper." Willow sniped as she massaged her aching tummy.

Spike noticed and jumped up "Are you in pain pet?" he asked concerned.

"Yes." She whimpered as another cramp took her by surprise.

"I'll make some tea." Giles said wisely as Spike took her gently by the hand and set her in his vacated seat.

"Is there anything I can do for you luv?" Spike hovered over her nervously.

"Got any Chocolate?" she asked hopefully.

"Let me check" he patted her shoulder and ran into the kitchen "Giles chocolate?"

"No, I don't think so." Spike's face fell until Giles added

"Although there might be some left over from Xander's binge on the second shelf down." Spike grinned at his treasure.

"Here you go Red."

"Thanks Spike." Her smile was like a small piece of heaven.

"Willow." Giles handed her tea and her smile widened as she took a sip.

"Sorry, what was the emergency?"

"Well I actually mislaid a book and I needed something looking up on the computer."

Willow stared at him for a minute until he backed away nervously.

"You dragged me out here In the middle of the night, when I feel like crap because you wanted to check something and you'd lost. A. book?" her voice was abnormally quiet.

"Uh yes." Giles answer came out a little strangled as her eyes flashed.

"That's it!" she stood up wincing slightly "You are old enough to learn how to speak demon and do witchcraft, then you are damn old enough to learn how to use a bloody computer!" she pointed to the computer chair "Now sit the hell down!"

Giles sat down so fast he felt his stomach get left behind. Spike smirked and let loose a soft laugh at the Watchers behaviour. Giles glared at him.

"You too Spike." Spike's face dropped and it was Giles's turn to sneer

"Now listen Red, I'm a demon and I don't need to."

"Computers aren't just a fad Spike, they are the future and you either learn how to use them or get left behind and being immortal you can't afford that." She stared at him. He stared back.

"No." he stated and he meant it, he really did and nothing she could do was going to get him to... was her lip trembling?
Willow's eyes started to tear up as he glared at her. His stony expression fell to one of horror as a single tear hung on her eyelash and threatened to drop.

"Oh God don't cry, pet. OK, OK I'll do it, I'll do anything please just don't cry." He pleaded and wiped the tear away with his thumb.

He hurriedly sat next to Giles before she could cry anymore.

"Whipped." Giles taunted quietly

"OK, now both of you turn on the computer, flick the switch on the back and turn on the monitor."

"I knew that!" Giles said insulted.

"Uh, that this?" Spike said confused pointing to the screen.

"Yes." Willow nodded and smiled sweetly. Spike grinned sheepishly.

"Now its loaded up we need to connect to the net. Take the mouse and click the left hand button twice over that blue e."

Giles did so quickly as Spike stared in distaste at the mouse. He took it uncertainly and moved it to the blue e on the screen and tentatively tapped it twice. The screen flashed and Spike sat back panicked that he'd broken it and Willow would cry.

"That's great." Willow smiled at him again. "Now up there there's where you write the address of where you want to go. Like a home address. We want search engines to look for what we want so Giles you can try the council's address. Type in www dot. dot that's down there." She pointed as Giles searched.

"Ah yes, I knew that." Giles said blushing slightly.

"Watcherscouncil no space dot co dot uk." She leaned back "Then press enter."

"Now Spike, we can find stuff on Askjeeves. So type in-"

"" Spike asked as he typed.

"Yeah!" Willow patted his shoulder and Spike grinned.

Giles leaned over and hissed "Teachers pet."

"Sod off." Spike stated "So then I get this little Butler guy, Red."

"That's Jeeves, so type in. what demon are we looking for again?"

"Polgara." Giles said "So I type that in this box that says search?"

"Yup, both of you. P-O-L-G-A-R-A"

"Uh I got something." Spike said waving to his screen "It says Dusk till Dawn, in blue and my little arrow thing turns into a hand."

"That means it's an active link that will take you to another web site. Click on it."

A red page sprang up full of pictures of demons. Willow peered over his shoulder totally, and blissfully unaware of the effect her closeness was having on Spike and his overactive hormones. He shifted in his seat trying to get comfortable and Spike could see Giles smirking at him from the corner of his eye.

"Scroll down." Willow commanded absently.

Spike stared at the screen, the mouse and the keyboard "Uh how?"

"Oh, Oh sorry!" Willow said distressed "Take the mouse and point it at this little side bar here." She pointed to the edge of the screen "Then click on the bottom arrow and it moves the page down slightly."

"Like this?" Spike tried awkwardly.

"Almost." She moved and placed her hand over his moving his fingers slightly and tapped his fingers with her own moving the page down. Spike swallowed at the sensation of her soft hands on his own and his treacherous body came up with a dozen images of where those soft warm hands could go.

"Wow, they've got almost every demon we've ever come up against." Willow said amused then she frowned and blushed "Even Moloch!"

"Moloch?" the name was unfamiliar

"Willow sort of dated him." Giles offered

"WHAT?" Spike gaped and jumped up staring at Willow

"Only sort of." Willow said "I didn't know he was a demon, we met on the Internet."

Spike stared at the picture of Moloch, he was green with horns. "You dated Wolf boy and.and Xapper and THAT but you don't even look at me?"

It was Willow's turn to gape "Do you want me to look at you?"

"No." too late Spike realised what he'd said and tried not to look too hurt. Willow tilted his chin up and stared into his beautiful blue eyes.

"Do you?" she asked softly.

"Yes." he replied equally as soft.

"I'm looking." She smiled gently and Spike's stomach flip flopped.

"Do you like what you see?" some of his cocky attitude seeped back in.

"Every square inch and then some." Willow teased and reached up to lock his lips with hers.

He returned the kiss wholeheartedly and crushed her to him. After a few seconds she pulled away and gasped loudly.

"W- what did I do?" Spike said wildly worried.

"Not you." Willow pushed out between gritted teeth and clutched her stomach "Cramps."

Spike sat down in the computer chair and pulled her into his lap rubbing both her back and tummy simultaneously. Willow purred as some of the tension left her body.

Giles made to stand "Maybe I'll go and."

"Sit!" Willow barked "We still have lessons left."

"But pet, you are in pain." Spike complained.

Willow brushed her lips against his and pouted "Please?"

"OK." He sighed needlessly and pulled her closer to him.

"Whipped!" Giles threw at him.


Two hours later the boys had been thoroughly educated in the use of search engines, databases and Internet sites, there was still some way to go and Willow was talking about setting up e-mail addresses for them.

"Let me take you home." Spike said picking up Willow's bag and handing it to her.

"You can take my car." Giles said and Willow went to open it up.

"Do you mind about me and Red?" Spike asked as she left.

"Honestly I've been waiting for weeks for it to happen." Giles rolled his eyes "Now take her home."

"Sure thing Rupert."

"Oh and Spike?" Giles called as Spike reached the door.


"When you come back, could you kindly remove my book from under the chair and put it back on the shelf?" Spike's jaw dropped and Giles chuckled

"Good night Spike."