Distro: Mystifying Dreams, WWOMB, WLS, RedsSoulmates, Poetry In Motion, NHA, Writings of the Femail, my Livejournal and others
Spoilers: season 5
Pairing: Spike/Willow
Rating: Over 16.
Summary: And they all fall down.
Thanks to Kat and Jennillu for the beta and for being there for the entire series. They kept me on track and grammatically correct. Very special ladies, indeed!
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She won’t even look at me. The entire walk back none of them look at me. They do, however, hold nothing back when it comes to casting hateful glares at Spike.
My arm is hurting at the shoulder from when Xander yanked me away from being “molested by the evil dead,” but I don’t say anything. I just want to get this over with. Giles clucks, apparently disappointed, but is too British to say anything.
Yet.
The Magic Box comes into view and a feeling of dread covers me, not so different from just before I approached Glory earlier. I glance at them and know that this is the calm before the storm, and as soon as we are behind closed doors all hell will break loose.
~~~*~~~
We’re herded into separate rooms, me into the training room as Spike is manhandled down the stairs and into the basement. I hear him, protesting, but he’s unable to do more than that without getting a searing headache. I’m just glad Buffy’s in here with me and not down there being the stake-happy slayer that I know her to be. I don’t know where Anya is. Knowing her, she’s off in some corner with Dawn, humming and counting money.
“I knew it, you know.” Tara’s voice startles me for a second because no one has really spoken since we arrived. There were just the coordinated and seemingly preplanned motions of splitting Spike and me apart.
I can’t find the words to fix this and fight to keep the tears back, knowing they won’t help.
“I even told you. The day of the fair...you were being weird, Willow. Had been acting funny for a while. Always going to him, finding reasons to see him and I just KNEW it,” she hisses. I never knew she could hiss.
“Willow, what’s she talking about?” Buffy steps away from where she has been leaning against the wall.
“I...when your mom...” I start, but Tara interrupts and she is more aggressive that I ever imagined she could be.
“What I mean,” she says, staring at me but talking to Buffy, “is that Willow has been running around with Spike for weeks. Every chance she got, she went to that crypt or patrolled with him...she even missed class hanging out with him.”
Buffy turns slowly, her mouth set in that grim mask of disapproval. “Wills?”
“He was alone and he cared, about your mom I mean. And I saw him at her grave...”
“He was probably gloating, Willow!” Buffy yells, but I know she doesn’t mean it. Even she knows that they had an odd, unexplainable affection for each other.
“Stop it. Don’t do that to her,” I tell Buffy.
“And what about me, Willow? While I was getting tormented by Glory where did you run off to? Was it him?”
I open my mouth to deny it. “Tara...” That’s as far as I get. I can’t lie to her now, and I am not ashamed of Spike. “I didn’t know what Glory was doing until after I left his crypt.”
“Wait.” Again I am being snatched by my arm, this time by a super powered Buffy who is a little emotionally unstable at the moment. “You’ve been going to his crypt? What the hell is going on, Willow? Because I really don’t get you anymore.”
I try to pull away, but her grip is firm. “You’re hurting me. Let go.” She does quickly, almost startled, and I move away from them both. I want to send Buffy out; this is between Tara and me, and it's none of her business. But that would free her up to go downstairs with Spike and I’d rather not have that happen more than I mind her butting in.
Amazingly, I can feel him, at least I think so. His mood is one of calm irritation and I imagine that he’s being lectured at by Giles. I’m sure this is no picnic for him either and I just wish we were together. My bottom lips starts to tremble and I think the crying is about to begin when something warm and wonderful washes over me, pushing the tears away from the brink. It’s him doing this, his way of letting me know it’s okay and that he is with me.
“Did you fuck him?” And it gets weirder and weirder. Hearing such crass words from Tara has me stunned as I string together the actual meaning, but the delay is enough to affirm her suspicions.
The slap is jarring and when I come to my senses, Buffy is holding Tara back while she spits venom at me. “You and your lesbo street cred speech! While I was being screwed by her you were screwing him?”
Tears do fall now because I know we can’t get past this. I’m such a terrible girlfriend. “I tried to kill her for what she did to you. She almost killed me in the process and I did find a way to get you back. I’m sorry for this Tara. I....didn’t plan any of it, but it happened. Spike happened.”
“So I’m supposed to what...forgive and forget?”
“No.” I turn to the door of the training room a second before it flies open, revealing Spike. Xander and Giles are hot on his trail, but he gets to me before they get to him and gathers me in his arms.
“Don’t lay another soddin’ hand on her,” I hear him say, but I can’t see anything since I’ve buried my face in his chest, chicken that I am.
“Spike, let her go,” Giles is saying.
“No, I won’t. I’ve listened to your speech and I’m done. Someone hit her and I’m taking her out of here.”
“You aren’t going anywhere with her.” Buffy’s voice is deep and quiet and I just know she’s twirling a stake so I lift my head and glare at her as Dawn appears behind them, curious.
“Yes...he is. I’m sorry this has everyone so upset, but only Tara has a right to be. Please, just let us go.”
Xander and Giles both visibly deflate, stepping out of the doorway as if conceding defeat for the moment. Buffy, however is standing her ground, staring Spike down, and I give her one more look, pleading with her to back off. I’m sure I’ll hurt her if she goes for him and I don’t want it to come to that.
“How did you know she got hit?”
Tara’s question is quiet, but they all hear and perk up again at the prospect of arguing some more. It’s like they are getting a happy from all this angst.
Spike purses his lips and is trying to avoid the real answer. “Vampire hearing, pet.”
“Yeah, but how did you know it was Willow that got hit?” Buffy chimes in and it becomes a free for all with everyone speculating and firing questions at him as he blatantly ignores the noise.
“It’s the bond.” Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about our helpful and extremely ill-timed ex-vengeance demon that happens to know all about every freaking thing demonic that ever existed!
Buffy and Xander are slower on the uptake, but Giles is a quick study and I see it as that alter ego of his settles in for a visit. He moves toward Spike and I get in his way.
“No! Stop this! He just saved Dawn. Buffy was ready to kill us all, let us all die, let the world end to save her, but he did it. So leave him alone. What we’ve done is our business and I won’t let you hurt him.”
They all look duly ashamed, but I know it won’t last long. Tomorrow they’ll be back to being self-righteous and judgmental.
Spike knows it too and uses their guilt to our advantage. “Come on, Red. I’ll walk you home,” he says, as we step past everyone carefully. Dawn stops him and pulls him down to her height to plant a kiss on his cheek. It takes everything in Buffy not to snatch her sister away, but she manages. Hypocrite.
We leave without another word, but I know that I won’t let him go back to that crypt. I don’t trust Giles, Buffy or Xander to not go there to convince him to stay away from me. Even Tara seems capable of hurting him. I saw a side of her I did not know existed, and while it was fascinating, I could do without the violence.
“That went better than expected,” he announces as he drags a cigarette pack from his pocket.
“What?” I stop and glare up at him. “Were you in the same place as me? Tara hates me. They all think I’m crazy and they wanna kill you!” He’s just smiling.
“They’ve always wanted to kill me, pet.” He starts walking again and goes about lighting a cigarette. “So your bird, she’s the one who hit you, yeah?”
I pout a little. “Not my bird anymore, but she popped me pretty good.”
“That she did. I’ll give her that one. But she ever touches you again, I cut off the hand she uses, chip or no chip.”
I come to a halt again, staring at him. He is very serious, and I better handle this now before he does something.
“You can’t hurt them, Spike. I mean it. She was upset and the slapping was a bit overboard, but your brand of revenge is extreme as well, so leave that kind of thing to me, okay?” I pat his chest through the fabrics and he is giving me a weird smile.
“Sure, luv.” He takes my hand and starts walking again. “So where to, my place or yours?”
“Mine, definitely,” I laugh.
Strolling along, he talks about everything and nothing, seeming to be over anything that the gang may say or do already. I know it’s a show, can feel his annoyance at being subjected to their opinions and wrath. But he puts on a good show, one that he has become skilled at performing. I listen to his chatter, pleased that he is comfortable enough to vent, and I know we’ll be okay.
Tara is my past. A lovely past, and I don’t regret that time, just how it ended, how I hurt her. But Spike, this amazingly complicated and surprisingly sweet vampire, is my future, and I greet him with open arms and an accepting heart. It’s scary in a way, the idea of loving him, and I wonder if I am crazy. Yet this feels too good, and if it means I’m crazy, then lock me up in my padded cell.
Just make sure the blonde vampire has the key.
The End