Intro.

Darkness inhabited every corner of her subconscious, going on in front of
her in never ending waves. Her mind was fighting to escape free, to
break through the barrier between what is real and what is a dream. With
an attempt to free herself, she tried to pry her eyelids open. Slowly,
she found herself going from the pitch black of her dreams to the
haziness of a dark room. Her eyes struggled with her heavily drugged
mind to comprehend as fuzzy figures emerged from the walls around her.
They seemed to float before her, slowly coming into focus and then once
again returning to the darkness. Finally, focusing on one as it tried to
talk to her, she gasped as she asked, “How could you do this to me?”
 

Part One
 

Even though her tears were almost blinding her, Faith could feel them all
around her. As her demon melded with the slayer with in, she struck out
at them with a fury. A blade in the toe of one of her boots sliced one
vamps neck as her wooden staff was thrust into another vampire on the
opposite side. Landing on her feet, her free hand pulled a stake from
her back pocket and then threw it as her other hand extended the staff
again. Four vamps down, one to go.

Moving into action again, she pulled another stake and lunged it into the
heart of her attacker. Instinctively, she waited for the release of the
vampire turning to dust, but instead, the vampire stayed solid. With a
strained voice, he spoke out to her, “Faith!”

Faith pulled out the stake and dropped it. Trembling, she blinked tears
away and asked, “William?”

William reached out and caught his childe as she started to fall to the
ground. Holding her close, he let her cry into his chest for a while,
gently running his fingers through her dark hair. After a while, she
stopped crying and lifted her face to look into his concerned eyes.
“Faith, what is wrong?”

“Oz… Oz…” Not able to go on, she started crying, having trouble keeping
her emotions stable. Once again, William held her close as she shook in
his embrace, body wrenching sobs taking over her. Finally, after several
minutes, when her crying subsided, she looked up with her blood red tear
stained face. “He left me, William. He said I needed someone who could
better understand me.”

William led her to a bench and asked, “Do you want me to talk to him? He
probably is just having a problem with the whole vampire thing.”

Faith shook her head as she answered, “No, he is right. I am a monster.
No one deserves to be stuck with me.”

William almost growled and had to hold back his demon, angry that Oz had
set her back in all the work they had put into her self-esteem. “You are
not a monster, and I don’t want to ever hear those words out of your
mouth again!”

“What about you, William? What did you think of yourself and the things
you had done when you gained your soul back? Look me in the eye and tell
me you didn’t think of yourself as a monster.”
 

Looking down, William answered, “I thought I was a monster, but things
were different. Angelus and I had left a bloody trail across Europe.
You…”

Faith interrupted him as she stared ahead. “…Killed a lawyer. Blood is
blood, William, and I have it on my hands. It will always be there, in
the back of my mind, and in the minds of my friends. There is no getting
away from it.”

“No, there isn’t, but there is such a thing as forgiveness. Someday, you
will look with in, and you won’t see a monster, but yourself. Trust me,
I have been there. Plus, there will be a day when someone else will look
in your eyes, and they’ll love dearly what they see. If Oz can’t see
that, then maybe this is right.”

Clenching her fists, she looked at them, here eyes starting to water
again, “But it hurts so much.”

Getting up and leading her to his car down the street, he nodded,
“Sometimes we have to go through the pain to see the light ahead.”

Faith looked over at him as she started to get into the car, “Yes, but
how much pain do I and others have to endure before we reach that light?
I mean, think of how ling it took you to meet up with Willow.”

Starting the car, he nodded. “Yes, but I had already forgiven myself
when I met her.”

They drove on in silence for a while and then Faith turned to William.
“Why did you turn me, William? Was it just for convenience?”

William was quiet for a few minutes as he drove ahead, trying to decide
what to say. Needlessly sighing, he answered, “My demon wanted you.”
Pulling into the drive of the house he shared with Willow and Angel, he
placed the car in park and turned the key as he tried to explain, “It was
attracted to you physically and intrigues by what you could be. Plus,
well, in the back of my mind, I know you could be my salvation.”

“Oh, so it was all about you and to hell with Good O’ Faith? One less
slayer about, so who cares!”

William groaned as he looked over at her. This was not something he was
prepared to deal with tonight. Over the last few months, Faith’s
emotions seem to be in a perpetual volleyball game, going back and forth,
and dealing with them was becoming taxing. However, she was his friend
and as his childe, his responsibility. “It wasn’t like that and you know
it.”

Getting out of the car, Faith asked as she thought back to those times
and what had transpired between them, “Does Willow know how much your
demon wanted me?”

Nodding, he answered, “Willow knows everything.”

“Well, how nice you can have such a wonderful, perfect relationship with
the one you love,” she remarked sarcastically.

As he opened the door to his place for her, he assured her, “You will get
through this and we will be here for you all…”
 
 

He stopped mid-sentence as he saw the scene before him. Willow and Angel
had been sitting on the couch in what seemed to be a deep conversation.
As soon as he had spoke, Willow turned to him, tears streaming down her
face. Running over, he asked, “Willow, what is wrong?”

Angel stood up with pictures in his hands as Willow climbed onto the
couch and hugged her husband on the other side of it. Faith walked to
the group and met Angel’s serious gaze. As Willow let go of William,
Angel handed William a stack of pictures, which Faith gazed at from
beside him. Meeting Angel’s gaze again and realizing what he was going
through, she asked, “Should I alert the alternate reality Scooby gang?”

Nodding, Angel remarked, “Something tells me that if they don’t already
know, they will soon.” Turning and walking away, he added with his back
to them as he moved to stare out a window, “This isn’t only a blow
against me; it’s against both of us.”
 

Part 2

“Speaking of fucking and cones…”

Graham spit out the soda he had just taken a drink of and started to
cough as Tara patted him on the back. Shaking his head as he started to
finally come up with some air, he met the gaze of the two people who had
just entered the crypt. Xander looked a little red in the face, but Anya
had turned to the voice of the statement, Spike. “Fucking and cones does
sound interesting.”

Before Spike could reply, Xander asked, “So, where is Buff and the Rye
Man?”

“Probably running a little late. Buffy was suppose to pick up Dawn this
afternoon, and mentioned that it could cause them to run behind,”
answered Willow.

Anya remarked as she sat down with the group, “Maybe they stopped to have
sex. There is this little turn off on the way, that is a little
secluded…”

“Yep, I bet you know that turn off pretty well,” commented Spike.

Patting her leg, once again Xander changed the conversation, “So, Graham,
how did you talk the army into letting you go for the weekend – not that
we’re not happy you did, but…”

Interrupting him, Anya asked, “You’re changing the topic. Why are you
changing the topic?”

Xander sighed, “Because, dear, there are just some things that we
shouldn’t be talking about right now.”

Anya crossed her arms. “You don’t think anything I say is important
enough.”

“You know that isn’t true, it is just that somethings aren’t suitable for
conversation and…”

“Oh, I see. Stupid ex-demon, doesn’t know what to say and when.” She
frowned and turned her head. “Well, I’m sorry I’m not as smart as you
are when it comes to social skills, you..you..you…”

Rubbing her on the back, Xander tried to soothe over his earlier
comments, “You know it isn’t that way, dear. I love you. Sometimes I
just don’t know how to…”

Spike interrupted as he waved his hand in the air, “Oh, puh-lease. If I
have to listen to any more of this, I think I may have to bloody gag
myself.”

Xander turned to remark when Riley broke into the crypt. “Has anyone
seen her?”

“Who?” asked Spike, not really paying that much attention.

“Buffy.”

Spike turned around and looked at the distraught ex-commando, “Nope. I
haven’t seen slutty around lately.”

Willow gave Spike an evil look and then remarked, “We thought she was
with you.”

“I went to pick her up, but she wasn’t there. I thought maybe she had
headed over here, but then I talked to Dawn…”

Looking confused, Willow stated, “But why is Dawn there? Buffy said that
she was going to be late because she had to pick up Dawn from a meet at
school.”

“Buffy never made it to the school. Joyce said she hadn’t seen her all
day.” Starting to pace about the room, he went on, “What if something
has happened to her, and it happened earlier today? We might not have
enough time to do anything about it.”

Graham stood up and placed a hand on Riley’s arm, “I am sure that nothing
is wrong and you are just panicking. Something must have come up.”

All of a sudden, Willow’s cell phone started to go off. Picking it up,
she remarked, “Probably her right now.” Turning it on, she held it up to
her ear and remarked, “Willow here.”

“Willow?” Cordelia’s panicked voice reached her.

“What’s wrong, Cordelia?”

“Buffy. Is Buffy okay? Please tell me she is there. Angel is beside
himself.”

Standing up, Willow asked, “What is going on, Cordelia?”

Cordelia’s voice seemed to take on a quieter tone but then rose to a
frenzy as she continued. “Angel received pictures today, and they were
of Buffy. It said something about you both must pay and if he didn’t,
then they were going to do something to her. We were hoping it was a
hoax, but if it isn’t, then oh my god, what could they do to her?”

Willow snapped at Tara and then pointed across the room as she listened
to Cordelia, trying to stay calm. Tara looked to where Willow was
pointing and then headed across the room to the pen box. Picking it up,
she sat it on the coffee table and then opened it up. Inside, was a
large envelope, waiting for them. Tara picked them up and looked
fleetingly at the first one. Covering her mouth, she turned and handed
them to Willow. Looking down at them, Willow said coldly into the phone,
“Cordelia, I think you guys need to head down here, now. The sooner the
better.”

“Angel is already heading out the door,” remarked Cordelia and then the
phone went dead.

“What’s in the photos, Willow,” asked Riley as he started forward.

Spike peeked at them from over Willow’s shoulder and then stepped in
front of Riley. “Maybe you should sit down, Riley.”

Riley tried to push him out of the way as he remarked, “I don’t want to
sit down. I want to know what is in those pictures.”

Almost in tears, Willow gripped the pictures in her hands, her knuckles
turning white, as she almost screamed, “Riley, damn it, sit the hell
down!” Everyone turned to her as she started to break out crying.
Joining the quiet atmosphere of the room, Riley sat down and looked up at
her. Slowly, she reached out and handed him the pictures. Not waiting
to see his face, she turned, leaning into Spike as she buried her face
into his chest.

Riley felt his whole body get numb and thought for a second that his
heart might have stopped beating. Finding the air to breathe again, he
tried to think as the images from the pictures swirled before him.
Buffy. She seemed so helpless, out of it, unsure of her surroundings.
This was nothing like the Buffy he knew, but from the look of her eyes,
she was plenty drugged up. They seemed to roll up into her head, a head
which was lolled to the side in one of the pictures. Looking up, they
pictures fell to the floor in a heap as he found himself unsure of what
to do or say.

>From the side, Anya remarked as she poked around the box, “Guys, there is
a letter in here too.”

Xander picked up the piece of paper and read it out loud as Graham tried
to calm Tara down and pick up the pictures at the same time. “Pictures
were sent to our Angel. Is your Buffy there? Faith”
 

Part 3

Giles sat on the couch, rubbing his eyes as the images from the pictures
blurred before him.  Sitting his glasses on a table beside the couch, he
remarked, "I don't understand.  Who could do this?"

Willow, standing against her, William and Angel's entertainment center
remarked coldly, "Wolfram and Hart is my guess.  Angel may have become a
target when he helped the other universe by filling in for their Angel."

Lindsey shook his head, "I wouldn't put it past them, but it really isn't
their style.  Plus, why would they want both Angels?"

William turned from the darkened window and stated, "Probably because
Angel is suppose to play an important part in the apocalypse."  When
every one looked over at him, he explained, "When Wolfram and Hart took
me, they kept on going on about trying to turn Angel over to their side,
especially Holland and Lilah."

"Yes, too bad Faith ate her," Lindsey quietly said to himself.  When
everyone looked at him, he shrugged.  "What?  Faith is outside with
Angel, and Lilah Morgan always gave me the creeps."

"Oh, uh, yes, however, we really need to watch what we say when Faith is
near." stated Giles towards Lindsey.

In the doorway, leaning against it with her arms crossed across her
chest, Faith remarked, "I am a big girl.  You don't have to completely
guard what you say."

"How long were you there?" asked Willow.

William answered, "She came in when Giles made his remark."  Willow
stared at him for a second with a strange look on her face and then
focused on the conversation ahead of them.

>From the door, Faith asked as Angel came up behind her, "Can we tell if
the other universe has gotten the message yet?"

Willow shook her head and remarked, "Nope.  Not unless they write back or
just pop up out of thin air."

Angel, running his wet hair - wet from the perspiration of sparring with
Faith - remarked, "I just can't sit around and wait for them."

Giles, cleaning off his glasses and putting them back on, replied, "It
might be a while before they even notice.  They may have the box sitting
somewhere they don't usually look."

Faith shook her head.  "No.  Willow is really good about writing me back
real quick."

Willow added, "It could be that they are waiting for their Angel.  He is
in LA."

Angel started pacing the room.  "I just hate all this waiting.  Buffy,
their Buffy, is out there, probably in pain, and I don't know how to get
to her."

William shook his head and remarked, "I don't know about that.  Buffy
wasn't hurt in the pictures, just drugged up.  Something tells me that
whoever took her, they just plan on using her as a pawn to get you and
the other Angel where they want you."

 "Not only that," reminded Willow, "but the letter you received said that
you would have more information sent to you at a later time."

Angel stopped pacing for a second.  "For some reason, that just doesn't
seem to help."

"It wasn't meant to," replied Willow quietly.

The room fell silent.  An eerie quiet seemed to cover them like a
blanket.  Giles just sat, staring at a book in front of him but not
really reading.  William stood at the window, looking out, knowing that
somewhere out there, Buffy was waiting to be rescued.  Willow had sat
down on steps leading to the second floor, hugging her arms.  She had
lost Buffy once, and was not ready to face that again.  Faith sat down
beside Giles on the couch and started thumbing through the pictures,
thinking that if she studied them, maybe she could find something to tell
her where Buffy was.  Angel took up his pacing again, walking back and
forth at the side of the room, that is until he ran straight into a solid
mass that seemed to appear out of nowhere.

Looking up, he found himself staring into blue eyes.  "Graham?"

As everyone turned and stared at Graham, Faith remarked, "Nice purse
there, soldier boy."

Glancing down at the pink, fuzzy bag he was holding, a blush worked its
way up Graham's neck.  "It's Tara's," he stated quietly.  "She is on her
way."

"What about Angel?" asked Willow.

"Cordelia called right before we checked the pen box, and Angel is on his
way to Sunnydale.  Everyone else that is coming will orb over as soon as
he gets there."

Giles shook his head, "Tara?"  No one had really told him about the Tara
in the other universe.  Would she be like theirs', part demon, or would
she be completely human?

Willow remarked from where she was sitting, "The other universe's Tara is
good.  She played a big part in helping switch Willow and me back to our
original universes."

>From the couch, Faith remarked, "Tara and Graham are seeing each other."

Graham shook his head.  "No, we're just friends."

Faith started to laugh,  "Just friends?  Is that what they are calling it
over there?"

Graham was starting to wonder if he could get any redder.  First there
had been the comment on the purse, and now the whole relationship thing.
He had to admit that he wouldn't have a problem with there actually being
something between them, except for one thing - Tara's confusion over her
sexuality.  She had once been with Willow, and had admitted to him that
it was the only time that she had truly felt in love.  However, then
there was him.  For her, Graham was a mystery, and after what she had
felt for Willow, what she felt with him set her mind into a state of
disarray.  Graham knew this, and whenever he looked into her eyes or
heard her voice, he knew that he didn't mind waiting patiently for her to
figure things out.  All this went through Graham's mind in a second and
then was interrupted as Tara blinked into existence beside him, a bag
flung over her shoulder.

Tara tucked a stray hair behind her ear and then waved at everyone,
"Hey."
 

Part 4

Cordelia stared out the window, watching as the trees zoomed by but yet
the stars seemed fixed. It was something that had held her amazement as
a kid, when she would go riding with her parents at night. They would
always be in the front seat, not paying any attention to the daughter
sitting in the back, trying to learn the mysteries of those small balls
of lights. At the time, before she had realized what they were, she used
to dream that they were fireflies or small fairies that lit up, trying to
light up her way. She thought if she stared at them long enough, that
she would be able to communicate with these beings that watched from
afar. Now, it was different. Instead, her heart was full of other
thoughts, mainly the man beside her, driving the car.

They had grown so close, and Cordelia couldn’t deny the love she had for
the vampire. However, she also couldn’t deny the shadow that she would
always be under – Buffy Summers. Everyone, even Cordelia, knew that
Buffy had been Angel’s true love – the one to give him true happiness.
Had it been too much to think that she could even come close to filling
this void? Looking at Angel, she remarked, “I will never come close to
what she was, will I?”

“What?” asked Angel as he looked over at her. She couldn’t tell if he
was asking because he didn’t hear her or if he didn’t understand her. If
he was lost in thought, thinking of Buffy, then it could be any of the
above.

“Buffy. I will never be able to come close to what she was.”

The car almost came to a screeching halt as Angel pulled off the road.
Gripping the steering wheel once, he turned to her, hurt showing in his
eyes. “Cordy, how can you think that I don’t love you?”

“I didn’t say that. I just meant that I will never mean to you as much
as Buffy. She will always overshadow anyone in your life.” Cordelia
faced the front of the car, not wanting to meet his eyes, staring ahead
at the empty road ahead.

Angel ran his hands through his hair. How could she think such a thing?
Didn’t she know that Buffy was a thing of the past and would always be.
Sure, there had been times when he thought if there was ever another
chance, he would find his way into her arms. Things had changed though.
He wondered if it had taken place when he walked into the hospital room,
over what seemed years ago but had only been months, and thought that he
might lose the woman who was sitting beside him now. She had looked so
frail, and it was then that he promised he wouldn’t lose her, ever. Yes,
that had to have been the time when it came to being, and now, every time
he saw her, those feeling grew stronger.

“How can you think that, Cordelia? I love you so much.”

“But not like you loved her.”

Angel turned her face towards his so he could see into her eyes. They
were so sad at the moment, and if he didn’t know better, he believed that
his sweet, tough Cordelia was about to break down. “No.” Cordelia’s
eyes gave off the look that she was suddenly crushed, but then Angel
added, “I love you so much more.”

“And this trip?” The old Cordelia started to come out for a few seconds.
“If it was me…”

Angel shook his head, “Then I would be flying, not driving. Buffy is my
past, but she will always be a part of me, and I am going to help her
just like I would anyone else from Sunnydale.”

Cordelia smiled, “Except Xander.”

Angel couldn’t help laughing as he shook his head. “No, I would even go
help save the whelp.” Smiling, he wiped a stray tear from her eyes, “How
could you think I don’t love you like I loved her?”

“You left Buffy because you loved her too much, because you couldn’t act
on those feelings. Sometimes I wonder, if you love me like that, then
why haven’t you left? The only thing I can come up with is that I am not
as important as she was.”

Angel shook his head. “Maybe I left Buffy because of how much I loved
her, but since then, I have learned that there can be so much more to
love, and that I don’t have to run. You taught me that, Cordelia, that I
can love freely, with out having to fear losing my soul.”

“But the physical side, don’t you miss it?”

Laughing, Angel remarked, “If I have to give that up to see your smile
every day, then it doesn’t matter how much I miss it.”

Cordelia almost blushed, “Angel, I didn’t realize how…”

Placing his hand on her cheek, he slightly brought her to him as he
leaned in himself. “I love you, so much Cordelia Chase, but as for right
now…”

Gently kissing him, interrupting his sentence, she slightly pulled away
and remarked, “But we have a slayer to save.”

^~~^~~^~~^~~^~~^~~^~~

“What are you doing out here in the cold, sweet?” asked Spike as he took
off his duster and placed it on the slight girl before him.

Willow looked up as he dropped the duster on her, and drew the warmth of
the coat around her, taking in the smell of Spike. Nestling in the smell
of tobacco, she sighed and leaned into him as he wrapped and arm around
her. Spike softly moved some hair out of her face and asked, “Are you
okay, luv?”

Nodding slightly, she answered, “I keep on telling myself that I am okay,
and things are going to be just fine. Then, I realize that they’re not.
She is out there, Spike. Someone has her, and we don’t even know where
to start.”

Spike hugged her closer. “We will find her. You have to believe that.”

Willow sighed, “Are you sure about that? I mean, what if something
happens to her before we can even figure out what to do?”

“Buffy’s strong. We might have a few differences between us, but even I
have to admit that. I am sure that she will be able to handle her own
until we find her.”

“Still, to know that she is out there, helpless. Didn’t you see the few
pictures that they sent over to us?”

Spike drew in a quick breath, thoughts meandering through his mind.
Sure, he really wasn’t crazy about the slayer, but seeing her in such a
position, drugged up and vulnerable, it made him feel anger that another
person could do that to her, just to get at Angel. Now, that was low.
If anyone was to take Willow, or even Dru in that matter, then he would
be beside himself. It is one thing to battle face to face, but to drag
an innocent in… Wait a minute, what was he thinking? Hadn’t he used
that ploy before, several times? That was his game, and how dare anyone
use it.

Moving a bit and placing his hands on each side of her face, Spike
lightly kissed her forehead, both cheeks, and her nose. Then, leaning
his forehead against hers, he remarked, “Yes, I saw the pictures they
sent, and I promise that I will help out in every possible way.
Something tells me, thought, that they won’t hurt her until we give them
reasoning to.”

Willow smiled, “She’s a bargaining chip.”

“Trust me when I say it is a classic plan.”

“And if it was me?”

Spike leaned in and gently kissed her. “Then there would be Hell to pay,”
he answered as he backed away.

“You’re going to help with this for me, aren’t you?”

“I’m going to help because it is the right thing to do.”

Willow smiled and almost laughed. “Why Spike, if I had heard that out of
your mouth months ago, I would’ve thought you were delusional.”

Spike brushed her cheek with his thumb and remarked, “I love it when you
smile.”

Blushing a bit, Willow replied, “And I like it when you make me smile.”

Closing his eyes, Spike slowly inhaled Willow’s scent of vanilla and then
smiled. Opening his eyes to find Willow’s emerald green eyes right in
front of his, Spike asked, “What spell have you set on me?” Here he was,
William the Bloody, nicknamed Spike for the torture he put his victims
through, a vicious killer and demon, and in the arms of Willow, he turned
to William the Giddy. Strange thing though, when he looked into her
eyes, he didn’t seem to mind one bit – as long as no one was watching.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” They both laughed and then turned in each
others arms as a car made its way into the cemetery.

Angel was the first to jump out of the car, followed by Cordelia, who was
holding a large envelope. Separating from Willow slightly, Spike simply
said, “Angel,” with a single nod of his head. Willow and Cordelia both
watched on, wondering what would happen. The last time the two had been
together, in LA, things had ended fine, but there was always that fine
line between them that seemed to waver between pure hatred and just
seeming to get along for everyone else around them. Willow even held her
breath, watching with interest. Then, the moment was broken as Angel
moved forward, surprising them all and wrapping his arms around Spike in
an embrace.

Cordelia followed Angel and walked up to Willow as the red head let out a
breath. Raising a knowing eyebrow, Cordelia asked, “Hey, are you okay?”
Willow nodded and reached out, embracing Cordelia as the secretary patted
her back and remarked, “Don’t worry, there is no way that Angel is going
to let anything happen.”

Willow sniffed and wiped away a stray tear as she pulled away. As she
nodded a recognition of Cordelia’s remark, a voice stated, “See, Tall and
Glowery is here. I told you I heard an engine.”

Angel stepped away from Spike and looked at the three standing beside the
door of the crypt. Xander and his girl friend Anya were there, along
with Riley. For a second, he just stared ahead at Riley. In front of
him was evidence that there were still feelings rooted with in him for
Buffy, even if they were of the past. He was jealous that Riley was able
to share things with her that he hadn’t been able to do with out losing
his soul. Plus, there was the fact that the first time they meant, Riley
really wasn’t forthcoming with the benefit of a doubt. No, he had been
judgmental and accusatory about things he knew nothing of. Feeling
Cordelia place a calming hand into his, he said quietly, “Riley.”

Following Anya and Xander outside, Riley – who had been bouncing off the
walls – saw that the ex-demon was correct about hearing a car pull up.
Leaning against the cold side of the crypt, he lowered his eyes as Angel
let go of Spike. Angel. Now that was someone he was constantly trying
to put into the back of his mind. Yes, Buffy said that she was over
Angel, and that there was no way they would get back together. However,
that didn’t put Riley’s fears to sleep. Every unguarded moment, he would
find himself wondering if Buffy had a chance, would she leave him for the
vampire. Not only that, but being face to face with Angel, having what
he could lose Buffy to in front of him, scared him even more. The
vampire’s gaze was unflinching, not holding one bit of tolerance. Riley
looked up and met that gaze as Angel called out his name.

Glancing up at Angel, Riley noticed that the gaze he expected wasn’t the
same. It was one of concern and pain, and Riley knew that his eyes were
mirroring the same thing. Both of them felt for Buffy, and she was out
there, alone. There was no way that he or Angel were going to let
anything happen to her, and something told him that as soon as they got
to the other universe, he would see the same thing in that Angel’s eyes.

Angel stepped up to Riley and reached out to him, placing a reassuring
hand on his shoulder. “We will find her, together. I promise you that.”

It was then that Riley surprised everyone, even himself. Collapsing, he
fell to his knees as Angel followed suit. Angel looked up at Cordelia,
as if asking for help, as he steadied Riley. Giant sobs took over
Riley’s body, echoing among the dead. Willow ran to Riley’s side and
kneeled down on the ground, rubbing his back as Cordelia came up behind
Angel. Softly talking, Angel stated, “She would want you to hang on
strong, Riley. Get it all out, so you can do that.” Cordelia’s hand
tightened on his own shoulder, and as Riley’s sobs became more desperate,
blood red tears joined those of a frightened lover’s.
 

Part 5

“I’m so sorry, Angel.”

Angel turned around and looked into her deep brown eyes. “There isn’t
anything for you to be sorry about, Faith.”

Faith sat down and leaned against one of the porch’s many columns. “No,
I do. All I could think of tonight was myself, and Oz leaving me, like
it was that big of a deal, when the truth is, there are people going
through more than me. I mean, look at you – tonight, you learned that
you may have lost the best link to the woman you loved, the one person
who your soul connected wholly with, and here I am, sobbing because my
boyfriend broke up with me.” Turning to him, she remarked, “When you see
someone going through more than you, it places a perspective on your
problems and shows you how small they really are.”

Lightly pushing her chin up, causing her to look into his eyes, Angel
shook his head, “Never let anyone tell you your problems and pain are
insignificant or small. Oz meant a lot to you, just like Buffy meant to
me, and for him to leave you like he did, we wouldn’t blame you for being
up set. You have every right to be.”

“Yes, but Oz is alive.”

Angel let go and looked down. Quietly, he remarked, “Yes he is and so is
the Buffy in question right now.”

“Yes, but think about it, Angel. There is another Buffy out there that
you know. Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to have
another chance at it?”

Rubbing his eyes and then staring out into the yard, Angel answered,
“When I first saw her, in the other universe, all I wanted was to have
another chance, to hold her in my arms, to whisper sweet things to her,
to see that smile of hers over and over, but then I saw her look at
Riley, and I realized that was a dream of the past, for both of us. She
has a life without me ahead of her, and my life with Buffy ended the
night you were called.”

Faith seemed to ponder what he said, and after staring off into the
darkness of Sunnydale for a while, she turned to him and asked, “When you
look at me, do you ever wish I wasn’t here – like do you ever resent me
for taking her place?”

Angel glanced at Faith quickly. “Faith, how could you even think that?
When I look at you, I see…”

Before he could finish, a door opened behind him, and a small voice came
from it, “Angel? Faith?”

Turning around, Faith jumped up as she saw a small red head step out of
the house and then shut the door behind her. Wrapping her arms around
her, she asked, “Willow, how are you?”

Willow stepped away and took a deep breath, “As well as can be expected
when one of your best friends has been kidnapped.”

Angel wrapped his arms around her, and for several seconds, they stood
there, not saying anything. Finally pulling away, Willow looked up into
Angel’s eyes and saw something she didn’t expect. Before she could name
it, or say something about it, Angel asked, “Did you just get here?”

Willow nodded as she moved a strand of hair behind her ear. “It was a
bit crowded with us in the mix. Everyone is at the end of their nerves,
and I just had to get away – get some fresh air.”

Faith nodded. “Why do you think I’m out here?” Smiling, she added, “So
who all came with you?”

“Angel, Cordelia, Riley and Spike.”

“How is Riley doing?” asked Angel, concern in every nuance of his voice.

The blank stare of Willow’s face told him everything, as she tried to
decide what to say. She was seeing Riley, breaking down, crying with
Angel comforting him. It wasn’t something she had expected to see, not
on his part or Angel’s. However, afterwards, when a quiet had taken over
the graveyard and Riley’s sobs had ceased, she had seen something. There
was a fire, a desire that had set into Riley’s eyes, and at that moment,
Willow realized it would be the last time Riley would break down, until
Buffy was in his arms.

Willow opened her mouth, about to say something, when the door opened up
and Spike snuck out with them. Closing the door behind him, he wrapped
his arms around Willow and asked, “Are you alright, love?”

Closing her eyes and resting against him, she nodded, “I’m fine. I just
needed to escape.”

Hugging her a little tighter, Spike looked over her shoulder at Faith.
She was dressed all in black, with leather pants and combat boots.
Looking her over, he commented as he thought back to when he first met
her, “Damn, Faith. You sure have changed.”

Glancing down at her outfit, Faith turned red and then looked up. “I,
uhm, well, this isn’t what I really wear…”

Angel almost laughed at her discomfort. He actually liked what she was
wearing, but he had to admit that she just didn’t look like she should.
The pigtails and light colors had been replaced by black leather. It was
a transformation he had watched her go through many times, trying to
connect with the darker side that plagued her. Looking over at Spike, he
remarked, “Don’t worry. Something tells me the pastels will be back
tomorrow. Faith has had a bad day, so her bad side is showing for a
while.”

Spike smiled over at the slayer. “I like the look. It goes along with
the whole vampire image.”

Turning to Angel, he added to the shocked Faith, who was now covering her
bare mid-riff with her arms, “He has a point, that outfit looks great.
However, I like you both ways.”

“Bloody poof, has to be a softy in both universes,” commented Spike off
to the side.

Looking up at him, Willow rebuked, “I happen to like that about him. He
just wouldn’t be Angelly if he wasn’t.”

“No, he wouldn’t be Angelly if he wasn’t broody.”

Faith shook her head and then reached up, causing the corners of Angel’s
mouth to turn up in a smile with her fingers. “But our Angel isn’t
broody. He smiles all the time. See!”

Angel removed her hand and smiled on his own, “Thanks Faith.”
 

Willow smiled at the two, watching the strange interaction between them.
Rocking back against Spike, she asked, “So, what happened to Graham and
Tara?”

“We sent them to Cordelia and Doyle’s to help with research. Amy is
going to stop by there too, before coming here,” answered Angel.

“Amy!” Willow exclaimed excitedly. Even though she really didn’t hit it
off with the girl the first time they met, Willow was up to trying again.
She really missed her friend, even if she saw her everyday as a rat.
“How is she doing?”

Faith and Angel just looked at each other.
 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Xander Harris is an asshole and Graham Miller can just go to hell for
all I care!!!” Amy had barely got the sentence out of her mouth as a
knock came at the door. Spinning quickly, which caused her long mane of
hair to fly behind her, she opened the door only to scream and then shut
it. Marching across the room, she remarked to her two observers, “Shit!
How much more fucked up can this get?!”

Rolling her eyes, Cordelia walked to the door as Doyle walked over to
Amy, just in case she decided to keep up with her ranting. Opening the
door, Cordelia smiled as one of the two standing there covered her face
and begged, “Please, just don’t hit me this time.”

Smiling, Cordelia pulled Tara into the house and said warmly, “Don’t
worry. I’m not going to hit you this time.”

>From behind Tara, Graham remarked, “We were wondering, being the things
we think we heard in here and then with the door being slammed in our
faces.”

Cordelia looked over at Amy and then back at Graham. “Sorry about that,
we didn’t tell Amy about you coming. She doesn’t really like your double
right now.”

Tara looked up at Graham and then at Cordelia. Graham was one of the
sweetest people she knew. It was near impossible to hear about him doing
anything to make someone so mad. Then again, it was near impossible to
think of herself as a ‘bent to take over the world’ demon. “What did he
do?”

Crossing her arms and staring at Graham with a frown on her face, Amy
answered, “He stole my boyfriend.”

Graham looked at her as a wide smile broke on his face. The usually
stoic Graham almost laughed as he asked, “I stole your boyfriend?”

Glancing up at him, Tara remarked, “Do you have tendencies we need to
talk about?”

Sobering up, Graham shook his head and said quietly, “No. In our
relationship, I’m not the one we need to be worried about.” When Tara
gave him a cross look and he realized what he had just voiced, he looked
up at Amy and asked, “Who was your boyfriend?”

“Xander Harris.”

Tara’s cross look disappeared as both her and Graham cracked up. As
everyone looked at them like they had gone crazy, Tara caught her breath
and finally spoke, “Sorry, if you just knew our Xander…”

As the two started to laugh again, Amy remarked to Doyle, “Goddess, I
wish I could just orb out of here.”

Doyle stared at her for a moment and then replied, “Why don’t you?” When
she looked at him like he was crazy, he added, “I mean, there will be
investigating to do on the other side, and all their magick people are
here. Maybe it would be nice for you to do that. You could get away,
see the sites, meet up with their Xander and figure out why they are
laughing so much right now…”

Amy shook her head at his last suggestion. “You had to add that, didn’t
you?”

Doyle nodded. “Couldn’t help it.”

Standing there for a while, Amy thought about it and then remarked, “I
think you got a plan there.”

“What plan is that?” asked Cordelia as Graham and Tara’s laughing seemed
to have subsided.

Amy looked over at Doyle, to see if he wanted to answer. When he
motioned towards her, she answered, “Doyle and I were thinking that maybe
I could go over to the other universe. All of your magick users are
here, and what if you need someone over there to handle magick?”

“So, basically, all the more reason to get away from me?” Graham stated
as he looked at her. She was so stunning that part of him wondered how
any guy could pick Xander Harris over her. Then again, no matter how
stunning she was, there was nothing there that seemed to call out at him,
not like the small woman standing in front of him. He often wondered if
Tara, as quiet as she was, realized how much she called out to him,
sometimes, even to the point of yelling.

Amy narrowed her eyes at him. This was Graham Miller in front of her –
Graham Miller, who had stolen her own boyfriend out from under her nose
just a few months ago, but yet was not one in the same. This Graham was
different. Sure, he had the same stoic look and his eyes seemed to hold
the same kind of unspoken passion, but it was very evident that this
Graham’s eyes were set on someone else. Slowly nodding, she answered, “I
know it sounds childish, but…”

Graham shook his head, “No. It isn’t childish at all.” She was talking
to the guy that had kept so many spiteful thoughts to himself when it
came to Buffy – who had stole his best friend – but after he got to know
her, then that changed. He knew how it was to dislike someone so, that
you would try to get away from them, even if you didn’t know a thing
about them.

Tara nodded and commented, “I know they were trying to figure out how to
approach Wolfram and Hart when we left. William is sure they have
something to do with this.”

Above her, Graham added, “They were trying to figure out how to penetrate
the law firm, being the firm seems to know about most of us.”

“Plus, those of us they don’t know, well, we probably wouldn’t be the
best of candidates.” Looking up at Graham, Tara asked, “Can you see Anya
trying to infiltrate them?”

Graham closed his eyes and shook his head, “She would be having sex in
every office they had available.” Covering her mouth, Tara tried not to
laugh, but then found herself giving in as she looked up at Graham and
saw the laughter in his own eyes. Wrapping his arms around her, he let
her laugh silently, shaking against him.

Amy shook her head, looking at the two and then asked Doyle, “Do they
ever stop laughing?”

Cordelia answered, “Actually, the last time I saw them, they seemed so
quiet.”

Doyle, eyeing the couple as they had their silent laugh, remarked,
“Sometimes, when you’re with someone you feel so in tune with, the real
world doesn’t seem as heavy as it used to.”

Cordelia nodded, “Because nothing else seems as important as the person
you’re with, and you find yourself letting go when you’re with them.”

Amy looked from one couple and then to the other. Cordelia and Doyle
held each other’s eyes. It was something she had seen in their eyes so
much, and in some of the eyes of the other couples in the Scooby Gang.
Part of her wondered if Xander had ever had that look in his eyes when it
came to her, or was she just a convenience. She turned her gaze to Tara
and Graham. They weren’t looking at each other, but just by watching the
way he held her, she knew there was something there. Part of her
wondered if it was something they had faced or not. Something told her
that the couple had a ways to go before they faced their true feelings.

Taking a deep breath, Amy remarked as she picked up her coat from the
back of the couch, “I’m out of here, guys. I think I’ll drop by and see
what the rest of the crew thinks of our plan.”

Cordelia looked over at her and smiled. “Good luck Amy, and hang in
there.” Watching the tall brunette leave, Cordelia how much the girl had
changed. It was a well known fact that they didn’t like each other, but
for some reason, after Xander left her, Cordelia saw Amy as more human
than usual. The truth was, the girl wasn’t that bad. Xander could just
be a bad influence at times, and Cordelia wondered if that influence
might be what tainted the relationship between Cordelia and Amy. Then,
as she watched Amy walk out of the door, part of her questioned if she
would ever find out the truth to that question.

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