Rating:R
Disclaimer: Willow and Spike do not belong to me. Nor do any of the other characters from BTVS or ATS.
Feedback: kat_mor_01@yahoo.ca
Summary: Willow mistranslates a spell and things go wrong.
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~Part: 1~
Willow woke up on the floor of her childhood bedroom. She had come here to perform a spell in secrecy. There was a particularly hard to find demon in town and she wanted to help. Buffy and the others were still on her about her use of magic so she didn't tell them what she was doing.
The spell was designed to give her access to the mind of the demon. This way she would know where it was and they could go kill it. It seemed simple enough. Now she just had to wait and see if it worked. She got up and headed downstairs to the kitchen to call Buffy. She didn't want her to be worried about where she was.
"Hey Buffy, I'm at my parents place. I wanted to pick up a few things, just thought I'd call so you didn't start worrying."
"Okay cool. When are you coming home? We're ordering in Chinese food tonight. Xander and Anya are coming over with some movies too."
"Oh, in that case I'll get ready to leave now. I'll see you in a bit."
"Bye."
"Bye."
Willow ran back upstairs and grabbed a box of odds and ends that she had left behind and headed back to Buffy's. On the way there she was overwhelmed with dizziness. She leaned against a tree and closed her eyes. When she opened them the scenery had changed. She saw a ceiling over head as if she were lying on her back. She realized that the spell must have kicked in and she was seeing through the demons eyes. She closed her eyes again. She waited until the dizziness passed before she reopened them. Everything was back to normal so she continued on her way.
Once she got to the house and put her things in her room she lied down across her bed. She must have been worn out still from the spell because she quickly fell asleep. She was having a dream, but it didn't feel right. It was as if it were someone else's dream and she was just an observer.
In the dream she was a small boy of about 7 years old. It was along time ago, she could tell by the clothes that she wore. She sat in a chair in front of a mirror while a woman stood behind her brushing her hair. The woman was very pretty, she was blonde and had the most beautiful blue eyes. The woman was talking to her. She found herself answering in a small boyish voice.
"If ya would just listen better than ya wouldn't get into so much trouble."
"Yes mother, I'll try ta do better. I'm sorry."
"That's alright luv, I know ya tried yer best. It's just yer father thinks that ya have what it takes to be a great player some day. That's why he gets so angry when he thinks yer slacken off."
"But I don't like the piano teacher, she's mean! She yells at me an' calls me Willy!"
"I know luv, but she's the best we can afford right now. Someday, when yer father's book gets published will be able to do ya better."
The scene changed, she was now a young man of about 14. She was sitting at a piano on a stage. There was a small crowd in the audience, in the front row sat the mother and she assumed the man beside her to be the boy's father. She started to play a beautiful tune that she had never heard before. When it was done she left the stage. Her parents met her back stage where she was pulled into the womans arms.
"Ah William, it was beautiful."
"Thanks mum."
The woman released her and she turned to the man she assumed was the father. He was tall, thin and had light brown hair. He smiled kindly at her and pulled into his arms.
"Not bad my boy, not bad at all."
"Thank you father. Do you wish to stay longer or shall I gather my things?"
"We should head home now, your mother and I will meet you out front."
Willow woke up and sat up on the bed. She heard Buffy calling her from the bottom of the stairs.
"I'll be right down Buffy."
She decided after dinner that she would look over that spell she did and make sure she translated it properly. Those dreams were just to strange to be a coincidence. She only knew one person named William that had an English accent. And she SO didn't want to dream about his life.
Dinner came and went with the usual friendly chatter. They watched movies, ate popcorn and Dawn complained when Buffy sent her to bed after the last movie. Buffy headed out to patrol when Anya and Xander went home. Willow rushed up to her room and pulled out her spell book.
She looked over her translations and caught the error she'd made. The spell was supposed to read 'Bind in thought to the one in my mind. Let me see what it sees.' What she had read was 'Bind me in life to the one in my heart. Let us share what we've seen.' So instead of being able to get access to the mind of a demon that they were looking for, she was now going to get Spike's memories. "Oh great! Way to go Rosenburg! Get one stupid little crush on a bleached blonde Vampire and now you're going to get to know him up close and personal!" Willow groaned in frustration and trew herself down on the bed. She really wished she paid more attention when she translated that spell. Her enthusiasm always got her in trouble.
Willow decided to take a hot bath and then go to bed. She wasn't looking forward to dreaming about Spike. Well so far she had dreamed about William, but it was only a matter of time before Spike came into the picture. She started the tub filling with hot water and changed into her robe. Just as she slipped the robe from her shoulders there was a pounding on the front door. Not wanting Dawn to be woken up, she grabbed her robe and pulled in on as she headed downstairs to open the door.
~Part: 2~
The pounding continued until she flung the door open.
"Spike! What the hell do you want? And why are you pounding on the door like that?"
Spike pushed past her and strode into the house. He turned around and glared at her. Willow became very nervous as he continued to stare at her. A part of her was also slightly aroused by his intensity.
"What did you do Witch?"
"D do?"
"Yes! Do! As in what the bloody hell did you do!?"
"Um, could you be more specific?"
"Okay, your first day of school. You were wearing pink overalls and blue tennis shoes. You cried and said you were scared when your mother left you at the door. Xander came over and took your hand and told you not to cry, that he would protect you. This ring any bells pet?"
"Ooops."
"Ooops? That the best you can do? I relive bits and pieces of your bloody childhood and the best you can do is say ooops? And why the hell aren't you surprised?"
"Um, I kinda messed up a spell. It was supposed to help me find the demon Buffy's been tracking. It didn't work out the way it was supposed to."
"Really pet? Cause you know, your spells hardly ever go wrong!"
"Sarcasm Spike? That the best you can do?"
"I'll do a lot worse if you don't fix this! I don't want to relive your relationship with the wolf, or your groping session with the moron!"
"Oh? Well at least they're not crazy like Dru, or annoying like Harmony! Oooh, I can't wait for THOSE memories!"
"WHAT? You mean to tell me you have my memories? Bloody hell Witch put a stop to this now! I won't have you digging around through my past. It's none of your damn business!"
"Yeah like I want a lifetimes worth of memories of maiming and killing! If I knew how to stop this I would. Now if you don't mind, I was about to take a bath and go to bed."
"What? No way! You fall asleep and you learn more about me. Nuh uh. you go have your bath and I'll be waiting for you with a cup of coffee and your damn spell books when you get out."
"Arg! Fine, but stay in my room. Buffy will be home soon and I don't want to have to tell her about this. You know how they are about me using magic."
"Fine, but if you don't figure this out soon I will tell her."
"You do, and I'll be forced to tell her everything I know about 'William'."
"Witch!"
"Vampire!"
Willow went upstairs to the bathroom and added more hot water to the tub before stepping in. She lied back in the hot water and tried to relax. Her mind kept going back to how she felt when he was staring at her. It was intense, she was scared and aroused at the same time. Sure a big part of her crush on Spike was the fact that he was the 'Big Bad', he was the stereotypical 'Bad Boy' that every parent warns their daughter about. But the fact that he was chipped and couldn't hurt her was the only reason she hadn't run screaming from him. All the same, a tiny little part of her wanted to run towards him instead.
She picked up her body wash and poured some onto her loofah. She sat up and began scrubbing herself when she felt that dizziness again. She closed her eyes and when she opened them she was in the kichen looking down at the floor. She saw black boots attached to legs that were covered in black denim. She closed her eyes again, figuring that Spike was in the kitchen getting the affore mentioned coffee. Once the dizziness passed she again opened her eys and continued to wash herself.
She pulled the stopper and stepped out of the tub. After drying herself and putting her robe back on she headed for her room. Spike was sitting on her bed reading through one of her spell books.
"Have a nice bath pet?"
"It was fine, thank you."
"Oh no. Thank you."
"What? Why?"
"Figure it out pet, you're a smart girl."
Willow didn't know what the hell he was talking about so she decided to ignore him. She went to her dresser and pulled out a tank top and a pair of pajama pants. She turned back to Spike and was about to ask him to leave so that she could change when she figured out what he meant. If she could see what he was doing in the kitchen, then he saw her in the bathtub.
"Oh! You... You... Pervert!"
"Pervert? It's not like I was peekin' in the window! I'm not Angelus! 'Sides, it's your fault. You're the one who messed up the spell. That's the first nice thing I've gotten out of this mess so far."
"N nice?'
"Very nice pet."
Willow blushed, grabbed her clothes and left the room to get changed. Spike called out to her as she left the room.
"Don't leave on my account luv, I wouldn't mind another look."
Spike went back to looking at the book in front of him. He found the spell she had done as well as her translations. It didn't take long for him to come to the same conclusion that she had earlier. She messed up the translation, and in doing so, bound them together. She really messed up this time.
~Part: 3~
Willow closed the bathroom door and leaned her back against it. She couldn't believe what was happening. It was bad enough that she was getting his memories, but now that she knew it was happening to him as well? She decided that she must have been a horrible person in a past life. Why else would the Powers deem fit to lay her inner most fears and insecurities out in the open for a souless demon like Spike? He'd seen her naked! Okay he sort of complemented her about it, but that wasn't the point. He now knew things about her that were personal. He would use this against her, she just knew he would. Well hopefully she'd learn something about him that she could use to keep him quiet, because she was pretty sure that piano playing wasn't going to be enough!
Willow changed into her pajama pants and tank top and headed back to her room. Spike was sprawled out on her bed looking for all the world as if he belonged there. She kind of wished he did. He looked up at her when she entered the room with an expression that she could only decribe as a cross between hopelessness and embarrassment. He patted the spot on the bed beside him in invitation. She reluctantly sat down and waited for him to speak.
"Red? Do you realize what you've done here pet?"
"Um, besides screw up a spell?"
"Well yeah, you messed up the translation. Horribly I might add. In essence you changed the intent of the spell. I don't think it can be undone."
"Wh what? No! That can't be, there has to be some way, I, I don't want you to know everything about me."
"I'm no more pleased than you are luv. Big Bad Vampire reputation to think of here. Last thing I need is some human chit knowing all my secrets! Especially one of the Slayers pups at that!"
"Okay, then we have to make a deal. I'll promise not to tell anyone what I find out about you if you promise you won't tell anyone what you find out about me."
"And how do I know that you'll keep this promise?"
"Well...I give you my word."
"Not good enough."
"Well what do you suggest? Pinky swears? Or would you like to seal it in blood?"
Willow knew she had said the wrong thing as soon as she saw his eyes light up. While blood-letting was probably a very common occurence in demon dealings she was sure that it was something she wouldn't enjoy.
"That would be acceptable."
"Huh? I was joking, ha ha?"
"Look pet, If you want me to take you seriously about this it's got to be blood. If I give you my word on this is that gonna be enough for you to trust me?"
"No. I get your point, but blood?'
"I'm a Vampire ducks, blood is a big part of what we are. Now, are we gonna do this or sit around all night debating the issue?"
"How? I mean how do we do this, you can't bite?"
"Sharp knife, razor blade, you pick."
"I'll get a knife, stay here."
Willow retrieved a knife from the kitchen and then got some bandages and disinfectant from the medicine cabinet. She returned to her room and set everything on the bed before sitting down beside Spike once again.
"So now what?"
"You do as I do and say as I say"
"Okay. Oh wait! Do I have to like drink your blood? Cause that's kinda ewww!"
"Just a bit, a couple drops is all."
"Fine. Just hurry up before I change my mind!"
Spike took the knife and held it to his wrist. He sliced himself and then offered his wrist to Willow. She licked the blood from his wound, grimaced at the taste and then looked into his eyes.
"I give to you my solemn vow that all will be kept between us. In blood you have my word."
He pressed the bleeding wrist to her mouth once again as she licked the blood from it once more. Willow then accepted the knife from Spike and and made a small cut on her own wrist. Spike took her hand and pulled her wrist to his mouth. He sucked at her wound gently. Willow was so caught up in the feelings produced by his suckling from her that she almost forgot what she was supposed to be doing. She pulled her wrist away from him and he growled softly. When he looked up at her his eyes were flickering between blue and the amber colour of the demon.
"I give to you my solemn vow that all will be kept between us. In blood you have my word."
He pulled her injured wrist back to his mouth and began to suck the offered blood again. Willow let him do this for a moment longer before once again pulling her wrist gently away from him. Spike sat back with his eyes closed in pleasure. She set the knife on the bed side table and applied some disinfectant to her injured wrist.
By the time She had finished bandaging her wrist and putting the supplies away she felt a little lightheaded. She stretched out on the bed beside Spike to rest.
"So that's it?'
"Yeah."
"So no matter what you find out about me, it goes no futher?"
"That's right. Same goes for you too pet, or all bets are off."
"Okay, I feel a bit sleepy."
"Bloodloss, I took more than just a few drops. Sorry bout that luv. Couldn't help myself, you taste bloody wonderful!"
"Um, thanks, I think?"
"Rest pet. We'll figure out what to do in a bit."
"Okay Spike. Are you staying here?"
"Thought I might, that okay with you?"
"Mmm hmm, just shhh."
Spike chuckled as Willow snuggled into her pillow and fell asleep. He turned the lamp off so it wouldn't disturb her and lied down beside her. He wondered how much she knew about his human life. He hadn't learned much about her yet. Other than the fact that she was a cute kid and that her parents were rather unemotional. He could hear her murmuring in her sleep and figured she was probably dreaming about him again. He laughed quietly, usually finding out that some cute chit is dreaming about him would fill him with a sense of manly pride. This time he was worried about what she might think about him once she knew about his past. Thank God or whoever that she took a blood oath to keep his secrets.
~Part: 4~
Willow was dreaming again. This time she was more aware of everything, she could actually feel what he was going through. She felt as though she was actually William. Looking around she saw that she was in a library, there were a stack of books on the table in front of her and a note pad and pencil in her hand. His hand actually. She looked closely at the words scribbled on the pad. It was a poem, she knew he had written it. He was there at the library because he had argued with his father earlier in the day. He wanted to write poetry and his father wanted him to be a pianist. William didn't like playing piano anymore. Not since his hand had been broken over a year ago. He didn't have the strength in it for long hours of rehersal. To play a concert would be out of the question. His father said he wasn't trying hard enough, that if he just applied himself to it he could still be great. He told him that he would never touch another piano as long as he lived, and he meant it.
He stole a glance across the room at the pretty girl sitting by the door. Her name was Cecily, and he was infatuated by her beauty. He'd written a dozen poems about her yet none of them did her justice. He spent the better part of an hour working on the first verse of his latest ode to her. He just couldn't find a word to rhyme with 'Effulgent'.
The scenery had changed and Willow found herself in an alley holding a book and crying softly. William had proffessed his love to Cecily after reading her one of the poems he'd written about her. She laughed at his work and them told him he was beneath her. He had been so hurt and embarrassed by her public dismissal of his feelings that he ran from the house and didn't stop until he found himself in an alley . Willow looked up through his eyes when she heard footsteps approaching. She wasn't very surprised to find herself looking at Drucilla. She felt the Vampires teeth in her neck as William was drained of his life. She tasted the metallic blood in her mouth as Dru turned William into a Vampire. Then darkness, nothingness.
Spike fell asleep listening to the steady heartbeat and rythmic breathing of the woman beside him. He was spooned into her back with his arm flung carelessly over her waist. He was dreaming about her highschool days. The day she met the Slayer to be exact. Watching her best friend, the boy she loved most in the whole world, flirt with the new girl. The pretty, blonde, short skirt wearing, new girl. Knowing that Xander would never look at her that way hurt more than she would ever admit. What was confusing her was that this girl, Buffy, wanted to hang out with them when she would have easily been accepted into Cordelia's flock. Mabey, finally, someone had noticed that she was more than the shy nerdy little computer geek, book mouse. It would be nice to finally have a girl friend. Even if Xander was all flirty with her.
The next thing Spike knew he was at the Bronze dancing with some horribly dressed young Vampire. He was led off the dance floor and outside. They were apparently going to get ice cream by cutting through one of Sunnydale's many cemetaries. He was led into a mosoleum by the Vampire where he saw Darla with Willow's friend Jessie. The Slayer showed up in time to save Her but not her friend. He was taken to the Master. Spike knew this story, Willow had told it to him once before, but only now did he realize how that night changed her whole life. He could feel her fear and horror at the situation. The guilt she felt that she was okay and Jessie was gone. The gratitude for the Slayer's friendship.
Spike woke from his dream and found himself wrapped around Willow. He was quite comfortable and she didn't seem to mind so he pulled her in closer and closed his eyes again. It was nice sleeping with a warn soft woman beside him. Especially one who smelled so nice. Mabey this spell screw-up wouldn't be so bad after all.
~Part: 5~
When Willow awoke the next morning she noticed two things very quickly. One was that there was someone in her bed with her, and the other was that, that someone was a man judging by the hard-on that was pressed up against her ass. She decided to give herself a minute to wake-up and think before over reacting and possibly embarassing herself. Of course it didn't take long for her to remember the events of the night before and realize that it was only Spike in bed with her. 'Only Spike!' She thought to herself. 'Yeah, right, it's only Spike cuddled into my back with a raging erection digging into my ass! Why would I be worried about that?'
She was pulled out of her inner musings when the Vampire in question began rocking his hips against her. She froze trying to figure out if he were asleep or awake. Deciding that she didn't care either way she pulled herself away from him and jumped out of bed. He mumbled something and rolled over. Well, at least he wasn't awake.
Willow went to her closet and got some clothes out before heading for a shower. She thought about what she had learned about Spike so far. She had various memories of his human days, and could still feel his grief over Cecily's cutting remarks. She recognized the despair and lonliness and caused him to submit to his death in the arms of a Vampire. She had felt that way once as well. The fact that it was Spike she almost died for was an irony that was not lost on her. 'Love makes you do the wacky. Even it the wacky is to let some demon make a meal out of you because you were hurt by love.' She was flooded with images from his human life as she sleft. They didn't seem to be in any sort of order or pattern. Hell most of them didn't even seem to be important. School, friends, playing soccer in the streets. Normal boyish things that she imagined every one did at some point in her life. Spike was just an average male human. A little shy perhaps, sweet even. A poet at heart.Willow was beginning to understand a little more about the blonde Vampire in her bed and why he wanted her to keep his secret so badly. She finished her shower and dried off.
Spike in the meantime had woken up, alone in a strange bed. It took him a minute to remember where he was and why. He remembered waking in the early morning with Willow in his arms, how soft and warm she was. How nice she smelled. How good she tasted. He knew quite a bit about her now. He'd been assulted by memories of hers all night as he slept. Alot of it was useless shit as far as he was concerned. He had lots of her childhood memories as well. Birthday parties with the idiot boy, sleepovers with the Slayer. He remembered re-souling the poof and the attack he had made on the highschool. From her piont of view of course. Poor chit, stuck in a closet with the cheerleader. He looked up as she entered the room.
"Morning pet, sleep well?"
"Yeah, you?"
"Never better. Did you...uh, you know, dream...?"
"About you? Yeah. Did you? About me, I mean?"
"Yeah."
"Are we talking about this or ignoring it? I mean do you want to know what I know or no?"
"That's alot of bloody 'knows' pets. But I think we should just leave this be for now eh? Mabey we're better off not knowing what the other knows about us. Did that make any bloody sense to you?"
"Yep. I'm fluent in babble, it's my native language after all."
"Right then. get dressed and we'll go to the magic shop. Mabey there's a book there that'll help."
"Okay, back in a minute."
Willow took her clothes to the bathroom to dress. After drying her hair and putting on a bit of makeup she went back to get Spike. On the way back to her room she checked on Buffy. The Slayer was still sleeping so she figured it was safe to sneak Spike out of the house. She didn't notice Dawn coming down the stairs as her and Spike left the house.
~Part: 6~
The sprint from the Summer's house to the tunnels was made in a blaze of smoke and curses. Spike had only his duster to cover himself with as they ran the half-block to the closest entrance. They walked in silence to the basement entrance of the Magic Box. Willow stopped Spike just as he was about to open the door.
"We need to figure out what to tell them about why we're here."
"Tell them it's none of their damn business!"
"Spike!"
"What?"
"Don't be mean. That won't work anyways. Besides if you're rude then they won't help us. Or do you like having all my warm fuzzy memories? Have you gotten to the ones Oz yet?"
"Fine! We'll play it your way witch! I'll be a good lil boy. Happy?"
"Yep. But we still need to tell them something."
"I'm sure you'll figure something out, lets just get on with it."
Four hours had passed and they still hadn't found anything. Willow told them she was researching a spell that she had done a while back for a friend. She told the other's it was just to be on the safe side. She wanted to make sure she could reverse it if it became neccesarry. They believed her but they weren't much help. So that left her and Spike to most of the research. Willow had left to pick up some food for herself and some blood for Spike. When she hadn't come back after an hour Spike started to get concerned. Nobody else seemed to be worried so he left it alone. After she'd been gone over two hours Xander finally said something about it. Buffy and Xander went out to look for Willow and Dawn took the chance to speak with Spike.
"Hey Spike."
"Bit. What can I do for you?"
"Hmm, answer a couple questions?"
"Like...?"
"First. Why were you in Willow's bed all night? Don't lie to me either, I saw you last night and I saw you two sneaking out this morning. And second, what are you guys really looking for? I know it's not a spell for some friend."
"Christ nibblet! First of all it's none of yer business why I stayed with Red last night. But it's not what you think so get yer mind out of the gutter. Second how do you know it's not a spell for a friend of Red's?"
"Oh please! The 'friend' excuse is about the lamest one you can come up with. Besides, who does Willow consider a friend that isn't a Scooby member or you?"
"You're too bloody smart for your own good! Drop it, don't tell the others and I'll talk to Red about mabey filling you in."
"Okay, cool! I can keep a secret, you'll see!"
Just then Buffy and Xander came bursting through the front door carrying a passed out Willow. Xander put her down on the table and Spike rushed over to check on her. This received a few raised eyebrows but since they were too concerned about Willow nobody said anything about Spike's apparant concern.
Willow had left the Magic Box and walked two blocks over to the Deli and bought a sandwich. She was eating it while she headed to the cemetary to Spikes crypt to get him some blood. She just made it inside the door when her head spun and she fell down on the cement floor. She was immediately overcome with images and emotions from Spikes past. Unfortuneately these were not the images of a human past but one of a Vampire. She felt the hunger of the newly awakened William. Had carnal knowledge of not only Drucilla but Angelus and Darla as well. She knew the abject fear that Angelus instilled in the newest members of his family. She had the Memories of the countless hours of torture and rape that was inflicted upon the newly turned Vampire. She felt his pain and humiliation as his sire watched as he was defiled by her own sire. All of this done because he was turned without permission. Because Dru had decided she wanted someone to play with and hadn't asked Angelus for permission. Spike was made to pay for something he never had a choice in. She cried for William, for the young man he had been and for the Vampire he became. She cried for her friend, she cried for Spike.
Spike watched as Willow thrashed on the table. He could just make out the words she was saying. Spoken so softly that not even the Slayer would have heard them. A good bloody thing to as far as he was concerned. He knew that she was reliving one of the many torturous memories of his unlife with Angelus. He wished he could wake her but the others had already tried and she was unresponsive. They were considering taking her to the hospital but he'd convinced them to wait a few minutes longer. When she sat up screaming, he reacted the same way he would when Dru used to do it. He pulled her into his arms and rubbed her back as he spoke softly into her ear.
The rest of the gang sat in stunned silence as one of the most feared Vampires in history, not to mention that he was the self proclaimed 'Big Bad', rocked and comforted a young human woman. Before they were able to break out of their stupors they were floored yet again when the young woman pulled back, took a good long look at the Vampire holding her and then proceeded to kiss him.
~Part: 7~
When Willow woke up and found herself in Spikes arms she felt so happy to see him safe and in one piece that she just kissed him. She didn't think about the fact that the others were in the room or that Spike was supposed to be their enemy, her enemy. She was just overcome by emotions and kissed him.
Spike, for his part was shocked when he felt her mouth crash down on his as her arms wrapped around him. He quickly overcame his initial shock and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss. He wasn't exactly sure why she was kissing him, at the moment he didn't care. He just hoped that she wouldn't stop anytime soon. But that was not what happened. Before he could register it Willow was torn out of his embrace and a very angry Slayer had a very pointy stake pressed into his chest.
"What the HELL is going on here? Why were you kissing Willow?"
"Oi! Calm down Slayer, she kissed me first. Ask her."
"Wills? Why were you kissing Spike?"
"Buffy, put down the stake. This isn't Spike's fault. I was having a really bad dream. I woke up and kissed Spike. No big deal, I probably would have kissed you if you were the first person I saw."
"Um, okay. But no offense Wills, I don't kiss girls like that."
"Yeah well, Spike kissed back. He's a really good kisser and it just went on longer than it should have."
Willow looked over at Spike, she was blushing up a storm. He winked at her in understanding. He knew she wouldn't have kissed the Slayer like that. That kiss was meant for him exclusively. He stood up and went to the shelf to get more books. She went with him. When they were out of range of the others he finally had to ask what she'd seen.
"Was it Angelus pet?"
"Yeah, it was horrible Spike. I don't know how you survived it."
"Vampire healing, the body recovers quickly."
"I wasn't refering to just the physical stuff Spike."
"I know, I'm sorry you have to go through this."
"I can understand why you hate Angel so much."
"No, you can't. Not yet anyways. Hopefully we'll find a way to end this before you do."
"Yeah, ending this would be good."
"I'll miss the kissing and sleeping in your bed though.
He raised an eybrow at her in a suggestive leer. She smiled and punched him in the arm before walking away. They spent the next few hours going over more books. By sunset they still hadn't found anything and Spike and Willow decided to leave. They went to Spike's first so that he could feed and then they headed to Willow's parents place.
The Rosenburgs were on a cruise around the world so they wouldn't be coming home anytime soon. Willow decided that it would be easier to stay here than to try and hide Spike at Buffy's. Willow invited Spike into her parents house and they went inside.
Willow fixed herself a sandwich and they watched the TV for a while. They talked about the spell and tried to figure out how to reverse it. Willow wasn't sure exactly what the spell had done so she didn't have a clue how to undo it. Other than the memories there were no other side effects so far but that didn't mean that there weren't other things that could happen. That whole 'Bind me in life' part of the spell still had her worried. Mabey she should call Giles? Of course he'd yell at her and tell her she shouldn't cast spells without surpervision. Nope, not calling Giles!
"Hey Spike?"
"Yeah luv?"
"What are we going to do if we can't stop this?"
"I dunno pet. I imagine your gonna get the worst of this. I only get 19 years worth of memories, you on the other hand are gonna be bombarded with over a hundred years worth. And they're demon memories on top of it."
"Yeah, I kinda got that already, and can I just say ewww! I really did not need to know how close you were with Darla, Dru and Angelus! And stop laughing! It's not funny."
"Yes it is pet. Your nose crinkles up when you're disgusted. Besides, I'm sure you didn't mind it that much, you've shagged members of both sexes."
"Yeah but not at the same time! And not Vampires!"
"Just a Werewolf and a Witch. Big difference."
"That's not what I meant, it's just that Darla and Dru have tried to kill all of us, so therefore I SO don't want to know what they look like naked. And as for Angelus, well I hate him! He killed Miss Calendar, my fish, and I know what he did to you. I felt it. I just wish I didn't have to have the sex memories of those three."
"I understand. I can't say I'm looking forward to remembering your first time with the wolf. Although the times with the Witch may have some merits."
"See? You get all the good stuff! I get blood and violence and you get snuggles with Tara."
"Speaking of Tara. Do you think she could help? If you called her that is?"
"No, she wasn't ever any good with translations either. I'm surprised we didn't screw up alot more often than we did. Giles was always the one to undo my mistakes."
"Right, and we don't want to call him in on this."
"Not unless I have to."
"Doesn't peaches have a Watcher working for him now? Couldn't you call him?"
"Wesley? Yeah I guess I could. But not until tomorrow I'm too tired to put up with the questions tonight."
"Why don't you go to bed then luv."
"Sounds good, do you want to stay?"
"Wasn't planning on leaving unless you made me."
They went upstairs and Willow showed Spike to the guest room. She changed into a t-shirt and a pair of boxers to sleep in before climbing into bed. Spike slipped into her room five minutes after she fell asleep. He hung a blanket over the window and climbed into the bed beside her. She instinctively snuggled into him as he wrapped his arms around her. Spike closed his eyes and fell asleep.
~Part: 8~
Willow was thrashing around in her bed, the images were coming too fast and she couldn't sort them out. She knew that they were Spike's memories and that she probably didn't want to make any sense out of them but it was driving her insane. Every time she would latch onto something, start to make sense of it, it would fade away only to be replaced by something else. Perhaps it was her own mind trying to save her sanity by fast forwarding all the murder and torture. She just knew that she felt very mixed up. She felt angry and hurt, yet at the same time time she was also feeling desire and hunger. She wanted to hunt, to kill, to feed and to fuck. She knew these were the desire of the demon, she just never understood how powerful they were until now. It was a wonder Spike hadn't gone as looney as Dru! What with being chipped and all.
Spike was trying to soothe the thrashing red head. He held her close to him, her head cradled in his neck as he stroked her back and whispered assurances to her. He felt her begin to relax and he loosened his grip slightly. Just as he was about to pull away from her and lie her back down he felt her teeth in his neck. He pulled away abruptly, waking her from her dreams.
"Ow! You bloody bit me!"
"I did? Oh God, Spike you're bleeding!"
"Yeah, that happens when you get bitten."
"Does it hurt? Are you okay?"
"Fine ducks, actually I kinda liked it."
"Ha ha, very funny. What are you doing in my bed anyways?"
"Uh...you were having a nightmare and I was trying to help."
"Oh. Well thanks. And sorry about the bite. I guess I was just acting on instinct, your instinct but still."
"S'okay luv, go back to sleep. You want me to go?"
"Um, no. I mean if you want to, you can stay."
"I'll stay. Mabey I'll get lucky and you'll bite me again."
"Oh shut up. Go to sleep."
Spike chuckled but did as requested and lay down beside her. Before long they were both sleeping, Willow comfortably wrapped in his arms.
Spike was dreaming a most familiar memory, only this time it was from her perspective. They were in the factory, he had taken her and the moron to get a spell. He was crying on her shoulder, she was scared of him. Yet she understood his pain, she wanted to comfort him but was afraid of angering him further. When he leaned in and smelled her, spoke those words 'that smell, your neck' she was aroused. That frightened her even more. That she was turned on by a demon who held her and her friend prisoner, who threatened to kill her. Just as he was starting to work through this piece of information everything changed.
He watched as his body walked through the door of her dorm room. He felt how utterly depressed she was before he came in. He felt her depression turn to fear when she saw him. He knew that she had been scared, but now he felt just how truely terrified she'd been. When his fangs touched her throat, before the impending migrane that followed, he was shocked by the feeling of resignation. She was almost relieved that he was going to kill her. Then of course when he couldn't he felt her disgust with herself that even a Vampire didn't want her. If it weren't so sad he would've found it funny. Then she had actually tried to comfort him. And she had meant it! He was beginning to realize that there was alot more to Willow than he ever thought possible. The girl was something else, she cared. She truely cared about others and her friends didn't seem to realize how lucky they were to have her. He found himself sitting in the Watchers living room, he saw himself at the door. It was Thanksgiving, he'd shown up there half starved and weak because he couldn't hunt. He felt her pity for him as she saw the state he was in. She was relieved that he hadn't been able to drain her that night but she still felt bad for him. It was nice to know that someone cared.
Willow was trying to wake up. She didn't want to know this, anything but this feeling. It was just after Angelus had been souled, William had tried so hard to take care of Dru. She was mad with grief over losing her daddy. Darla was no help at all, threatening to stake the 'crazy bitch' if she didn't calm down soon. Poor William was at a complete loss as to what to do. He loved his sire, the thought of eternity without her scared him. He wasn't just a viscious killer, he still carried some of his human aspects. One being the capacity to love. He tried to show his sire that he loved her, that he would take care of her, that she didn't need Angelus. Drucilla laughed at him, told him he was weak. She hit him, scratched him, told him he was worthless. She only wanted Angelus. It was Cecily all over again, he was beneath her. His beautiful princess, He wanted to give her the world, he would do anything for her. But he couldn't give her the one thing she wanted, Angelus. Darla took him to her bed during the first few weeks after Angelus's disappearance. She used him mercilessly. Tying him down, whipping him, cutting him Dru had joined her in hurting him several times. She liked the pain, Angelus was always into playing games. William wasn't used to the whippings. After his first few months as a fledgeling he hadn't been beaten often and not unless he was being punished for something. He tried very hard not to piss Angelus off. Then he woke one night alone, naked and covered in his own drying blood. Darla was gone, she left before sunrise. She had abandoned him and Dru. He wasn't enough, not for either of them. He felt dirty, used. That was when William became Spike. He decided that he would prove to his sire that he was just as good as Angelus. Better even. He would become more viscious, more cruel. He would lock away his feelings, his emotions. If it would keep her with him he would do anything.
Willow wept in her sleep. Spike intinctively pulled her closer to himself. The two were both asleep, deep in each others memories. Both of them beginning to understand the other in ways that they never would have before.
~Part: 9~
Morning brought new revelations. Willow had learned alot about why Spike was the way he was. She knew he was now more like William than he had been in years. The Spike she remembered from that night at the highschool, the one who kidnapped her and tried to drain her in her room wasn't who he really was. That was who he became to keep his sire, his love, in his life.
Willow had plenty of time to reflect upon everything she had learned the night before as she lay in bed in the arms of a vampire. A still sleeping vampire who held her tightly against his chest. It felt kind of nice she admitted to herself. She opened her eyes and looked up at his face. He looked peaceful. Almost boyish. She had always found him attractive, even when he was the enemy. Now that they were sort of friends, she had been crushing on him a bit. She really hoped that he didn't find that out because of this stupid bond. She hoped that Wesley would be able to do something about it. She would call him as soon as Spike woke up and she could get out of bed.
Spike was awake, he had been for almost an hour. He was enjoying himself lying in bed with her. It was nice to hold someone again. He liked feeling needed, wanted. She had clung to him throughout the night. He'd woken a few times to find her thrashing in her sleep. He would pull her close and she would calm down, wrapping her arms around him and snuggling into his chest. It had been along time since someone held him. He didn't want to end it just yet so when he felt her waking he pretended to be asleep. He knew that they needed to call that Watcher in LA today and try and find away to break this this link. He was almost saddened by that fact. He was beginning to enjoy being in her head. She was an interesting girl. Although he knew that he was getting the better part of the deal. Poor thing, she was living through tortures that damn near broke him. It was amazing she was holding up so well. He loosened his hold on her and sat up slightly. He opened his eyes and found her looking at him.
"Morning luv, sleep okay?"
"Not really, you?"
"Not so bad. I imagine I've got it easier than you though pet."
"Yeah, you could say that again. I'm going to get up and make coffee before calling LA."
"Sounds good ducks. Can I use your shower?"
"Sure, help yourself."
Wilow headed for the kitchen and coffee while Spike jumped in the shower. After pouring herself a cup of coffee Willow sat at the table with the phone in her hand. She wasn't sure how to do this. Calling Angel and asking for Wesleys help wasn't going to be easy. She knew that Wesley wouldn't keep this from his boss either, especially since it involved Spike. That was the other problem. Knowing what she now did about Spike's past with Angelus, and what happened to him after he left she wasn't sure if she wanted to put him in this situation. Somehow Angel would find away to blame Spike for this.
Sighing Willow dialed the nuber for Angel Investigations. There was no other option at this time. She waited while the phone rang.
"Angel Investigations, we help the hopeless."
"Um, Hi? Is Wesley there?"
"One moment please."
As Willow was on hold Spike came into the kichen in just his jeans and socks. The button on his pants was undone and he was carrting his shirt in one hand. His hair was still mussed and damp from the shower. He looked sexy as hell and Willow almost forgot she was on the phone untill she heard Wesley saying hello several times.
"Hello? Is there someone there?"
"Oh! Hi, um sorry. Wesley?"
"Yes, this is Wesley Wyndham-Price, how may I be of service?"
"This is Willow. Willow Rosenburg, from Sunnydale."
"Oh yes, Miss Ro.."
"No! Sorry. I don't want Angel to know I'm calling. Not yet anyways."
"Of course. What can I do for you?"
Willow told Wesley about the spell that she performed. She told him the original purpose and how she messed up the translation. After she finished her story, leaving out the personal information of course, he was quite flustered. He couldn't believe that she was holding so well. Recieving the memories of a master Vampire such as Spike would be a most trying experience in his books. He asked that she come to LA and bring the spell with her as well as the translation she had made the first time. She agreed to come, but only if Spike was welcome to accompany her. He agreed reluctantly and stated that Angel would have to be informed of their circumstances. Willow agreed saying she would tell him in person when they got there. Wesley accepted her terms and said he would start researching what he could find and that he would see them soon. Willow hung up the phone and looked at Spike.
"So? Up for a road trip?"
"Not much bloody choice in the matter luv. I'm not letting you go see the Poof by yourself."
"I know, Wesley's right though. We need to be there if we're going to get this spell reversed. Or should I say stopped? I doubt that anything would remove your memories from my head now anyways."
"Sorry about that luv."
Spike turned and headed out of the kitchen. He almost didn't hear the faint "I'm not" that followed. He smiled, he didn't want to forget what he'd learned about her either.
~Part: 10~
As soon as the sun set Spike and Willow headed for LA. They left a message for the Scoobies telling them where they were going instead of telling them in person. It was just easier that way. Spike drove while Willow played with the radio station, she wasn't having much luck getting anything to come in properly so she turned it off.
"Do you think we should get a hotel room before going to see Wesley?"
"Nah, the Great Poof owns a hotel, why put out the dosh if we don't have to?"
"Oh, I just thought mabey you wouldn't want to stay there is all."
"Why not? He'll feel obligated to offer hoping I'll turn him down. I'll accept, he'll be miserable, fun times ahead if you ask me."
"True. You do seem to enjoy baiting him. I guess it would be easier to stay there instead of paying for a room. Besides I don't want to sleep in some dirty cheap hotel bed."
"Well, I can't say as I blame you. At least Angels place will be clean, he's bloody obsessed with neatness."
"Wow, you just called him Angel! You never call him that, it's always 'the poof' or 'Angelus' or 'pain gel' or 'peaches'or some variation of those names."
"I bloody did not! Take it back!"
"Nope, sorry. You did. You called him Angel."
"Aw fuck! Promise you won't ever tell him that."
"Hmm, what's in it for me?"
"Not funny Red. No joking about this. You know how I feel about the bloody wanker."
"Sorry Spike. I promise, your secret is safe with me."
"Care to exchange a little blood again pet?"
"No."
"Eh, can't blame a bloke for trying. As I said you taste bloody wonderful."
"And again, thanks I think. So how much longer till we get to LA?"
"Bout an hour, why don't you try the radio again?"
"Nah, it doesn't work properly. Do you have any tapes in the car?"
"Don't know, check the back seat."
Willow leaned over the front seat of the car to look for something to play, Spike tried rather unsuccessfully not to look at her ass and keep his eyes on the road. By the time she found a tape to listen to he had gotten quite a good look at her and had several fantasies involving bending her over the front seat in his mind. Willow put the tape in the player and looked at Spike who had a blank expression and glazed eyes. She shook him.
"Spike!"
"What?!"
"Pay attention! Where were you just now?"
"You don't even want to know Red. Trust me on that."
"Okay, but I'll find out eventually. I get your memories remember?"
"Fuck!"
"Hmm, I'd swear if Vampires could blush you would as red as my hair about now."
"Not bloody likely. I just realized that my life span has shortened drastically."
"Huh? Why's that?"
"Cause once you remember what I was just thinking, you're gonna stake me!"
Luckily for Spike the music came on rather loudly at that point and they drove the rest of the way to LA with out speaking. Willow was curious about he could possibly have been thinking that would make her want to kill him. She'd know soon enough she hoped.