Willow was dreaming. At least, she certainly hoped
that all she was doing was dreaming. Because this certainly wasn't normal
behavior for non-dream versions of her friends. She ducked her head, doing
her best not to look around. Ultimately, her best wasn't good enough, and
Willow peeked. And then stared.
She was in the library. With Xander, Oz, Spike,
Giles, and Angel. And they were naked. 'You did this, didn't you!' Willow
thought to her persistent inner sex obsessed maniac.
It didn't bother to respond.
'I said no more sex for Willow! Throwing a roomful
of attractive, naked men into my dreams will do nothing to change that!'
Willow thought, watching said attractive, naked men with glazed eyes. Yummy,
indeed.
'Live a little!' Her sex obsessed maniac cajoled.
'They'll never know...'
Like the good girl she was, Willow resisted the
urge to give into the temptation presented by her naked companions. Turning
her mind towards other matters, Willow decided that 'inner sex obsessed
maniac' was a somewhat cumbersome title for whatever strange demon it was
possessing her. 'ISOM?' she pondered, before discarding that option. 'Id-Willow!'
'Yes, yes,' Id-Willow said in annoyance. 'Now
that we have that all cleared up, watch the naked men. Touch the naked
men. Fu--'
'No, no, no!' her mind shrieked, stomping one
imaginary foot in fury. 'What did I say? No more sex! Sex is _bad_.'
'I seem to remember sex being very nice,' Id-Willow
purred.
Cautious-Willow spluttered in protest.
Ignoring the two squabbling figments of her imagination,
Willow inched forward. Careful not to come into contact with any bare skin,
Willow peeked over dream-Oz's shoulder. They were playing Scrabble, she
noted with no little surprise. Somehow, Willow had never equated dreams
filled with naked men with board games. It was just a little bit disappointing.
'Give me the word, and I can make this dream a
whole hell of a lot more interesting,' Id-Willow cooed hopefully. 'I'm
sure that when we clear off this table, it could serve as a very nice bed...
Or the checkout counter! Or the bookcart! Or the floor! Or--'
'Board games are fine,' Cautious-Willow proclaimed,
trying to cut off the flow of Id-Willow's suggestions. Once this awful
dream ended, Cautious-Willow was sure she'd never be able to walk into
the library again without blushing.
"I have a word," Oz said, oblivious to the two
arguing Willows behind him. He slowly dropped three letters onto the board.
'Like we couldn't see that one coming!' Cautious-Willow
huffed as she primly turned her eyes away from the most distressing three
letter word spelled out on the Scrabble board.
'It's a sign from above!' Id-Willow said firmly.
'What's the chances of sex being the first word spelt? It's obvious the
Big Guy himself wants you to spread your legs and a little joy around here,
Wills!'
'Well...' Willow thought, 'I suppose that does
make sense. And it's not like I'm ever going to have sex again in real
life, because lust is a bad, bad thing that leads me to acting like...
well, like this.'
'Makes sense?!' Cautious-Willow repeated blankly.
'God telling you to have sex most definitely does _not_ make sense!' Willow
didn't seem to be listening, as she'd gone from careful avoidance of skin
to... oh my, she wasn't, was she? Cautious-Willow blushed furiously as
the Scrabble board and tiles went flying from the table and Willow landed
on it. 'Why won't she listen to _me_?!' Cautious-Willow wailed.
'Because I come equipped with nifty visuals and
hands-on exercises,' Id-Willow snickered gleefully.