Sweet Revenge
Part One
Spike lit a cigarette from the butt of another and surveyed the Bronze wearily. Same old, same old. Same bloody people, same bloody thing night after soddin' night.
There wasn't anything to do in this piss ant town! He didn't even have Harm to be mean to anymore, she'd sired some college guy exchange student and finally buggered off to France.
He hated this town! He hated this bloody chip, and most of all he hated the Slayer! Stupid bint! She should be honoured that he'd even considered liking her.
He took a long pull on his beer hoping it would wash away his disgust with himself for basically saying, "hey Slayer, here is my heart, why don't you stick a bleedin' knife in it".
Unfeeling bitch! Well no more. Yeah he'd been a little . . . ok, ok a *lot* off his game lately, but now he was back, yeah the big bad was back and he was going to make the Slayer beg and plead. Oh she'd want death by the time he was through with her.
It was good to hate her again. Felt simple and clear, no more bloody angst. God for a while there he'd been acting like Peaches. Good thing he'd caught it. Next thing he knew he'd have been wearing a long sweeping coat and sporting more hair gel than a 50's rocker . . . Oh. Wait.
Well anyway he was gonna bash her head so hard . . .oh damn it! He hated this bloody chip! Hated. It. Sometimes he just wanted to shove his fingers through his ears and rip the thing out.
He inhaled deeply on his fag, and forced himself to stay calm. Not easy when you were wound so tight you could happily crack a nut with your ass cheeks. Alright so he couldn't kill her, but there must be something else he could do, he was evil after all, 'bout time he started acting like it.
Course he was still rude to the Scoobies, but they barely even listened to him anymore.
Him! William the Bloody! Being ignored by the Slayerettes when he once had them jumping through hoops to try and stop him.
He'd decided to leave town, he'd only been staying for two reasons anyway. Firstly to find one of those initiative doctors to take his chip out and secondly a certain annoying blonde. Since both those reasons had pissed on him from a great height he had no ties anymore.
But no way was he slinking away with his tail between his legs, if he was gonna go it'd be in style. With the Slayer crying and cursing and swearing revenge howling for his blood, even though it'd be too late. If he couldn't have her love, then he'd have her hate, but he damn well didn't want her pity.
How?
A memory suddenly hit him, Angelus, smiling that gentle smile that made even his blood run cold, saying in that seductive voice; "To destroy this girl you have to work from the inside." And Spike covering up his nervousness with a light retort, but thanking God it wasn't him making Angelus have that particular look on his face.
Work from the inside . . .
Spike snorted and shook his head. "Tried it mate," he muttered to himself. The Adam fiasco. Close. Bloody close now he thought about it, but still no cigar. But that was definitely the right track. Although going after friends and family of victims had never been Spike's bag, Angelus was the head game master, Spike preferred the direct route. Still desperate times and all that, but he couldn't kill any of them and there was no way the tactic he'd used for Adam would work again, they were all too solid at the moment.
Shame Angelus was gone really, he'd have been great for giving pointers here. Another memory hit. Him and Angelus watching Dru dance and babble happily. Making Spike's heart twist a little. Suddenly asking Angelus how he drove her mad, Angelus replying, amused.
"Spike my boy, breaking a human is simple as long as you have passion. Love, grief, hate. Take it down to it's most basic form and it's sex and death".
Spike's eyes passed over a couple making out on a couch, wavered, passed back. Oh no way! He was disgusted with himself for even thinking of it! But still . .
. Say if he could seduce one of Scoobies, make them want him as much as they hated him, humiliate them over and over. It'd drag them away from the Slayer, there was no way they'd tell her something like that. Use them and discard them. God he knew how much that hurt. Maybe he'd tell the Slayer himself, send them a dumpogramme via Buffy. When she checked his story out, he'd have killed two birds with one stone, hurt and violated someone she cared about, which would just eat up at her, and have shown her that William the Bloody wasn't loves bitch anymore
Of course he'd have to get out of town fast otherwise the only way he'd be leaving was on a dustpan, but happy vampires travel fast.
It was a good idea, the problem was the thought of seducing one of the Scoobies apart from it being difficult, was it was well, yuck.
Giles, no chance in this world or the world to come would he let himself be seduced by Spike. A challenge was one thing, working a miracle was quite another. Not his type anyway. Willow was possible he thought, she had a bit of a soft spot for him, but far too engrossed with the witch, it'd take months and he wanted results soon, besides he'd have to play nice which wasn't the plan, which left . . .Oh no way!
God no! Not the bloody whelp! Ah well, it was a good idea, but no go.
Although . . .Xander did have possibilities.
He had that whole 'not a superhero' inferiority complex going on, lessened but there. Recently dropped by the ex demon so extra vulnerability, bound to be needy. Well needier. And okay he hated Spike, but he was about the only one who even listened to him any more, at least Xander always rose to the bait, and he got a reaction. Now he thought about it he'd had some fairly enjoyable little spats with Xander. The kind you got when there was a spark there.
Yeah and when he'd been staying with Xander he'd noticed Xander's eye s on him a bit longer than strictly necessary when he'd been changing his shirt or whatever. He'd come out with some quip actually, "enjoying the view mate?" to which Xander had replied, "just marvelling at the Big Bad discarding a Batman T-shirt for a Hawaiian shirt." But there was a blush to his cheeks. Spike had just shrugged it off at the time, so the lad wasn't completely straight, so what, but now . . .
But no, Xander for Gods' sake, a vamp had to have some principles!
Although . . .Spike blew smoke out slowly as his eyes narrowed in thought. The lad was nicely built, no doubt about that, and a brunette, he'd always had a thing for brunettes, and those huge dark eyes . . .and what was it Anya had said, "a Viking in the sack". Hmm.
An unpleasant grin began to spread over Spike's face. That grew even wider as he
looked up to see none other than the whelp himself enter the Bronze. This had to be a sign, hell it would be wrong not to do this! Spike necked the rest of his beer, and ordered another two bottles. Then he made his way over to where Xander was leaning against the wall watching the dancing. He had to go see about a guy.
Part TwoXander was having a bad day. Worse because nothing particularly bad had happened. It had just been . . .tiring. It was exhausting waiting to feel better after Anya's departure. He didn't want to talk about it, he was tired of even thinking about it, he just wanted it to stop and he could feel better, but it didn't and he still felt numb and empty. He almost wished something had happened, like a demon attack or something. At least it'd give him something else to think about. But no. Nothing. Nada. Kind of like his life at the moment.
Saturday so no work. Patrol with Buffy, no bad guys. For the first time in history Giles didn't need help looking up something obscure, and Willow and Tara had a spell session going on. Whether spell was a code for something else Xander didn't know, and for the first time didn't really care.
He'd been at home until the silence began to severely creep him. Even under the sound of television and stereo he could hear it. The quiet. The emptiness, so he'd come to the Bronze, to be around other people. The guys were great and all, but they expected him to be cheery, or to share his pain, neither of which he wanted to do, this was good. Alone but not. No one expecting him to talk . ..
"Well, well, if it isn't my ex roommate. Here all on your lonesome?"
Xander closed his eyes briefly. Spike. Great. Of course. He really didn't think he had the energy for this, but the Bronze was too small to avoid him, best to just exchange insults until Spike got bored and went away.
"Spike. Taking a break from Harmony's intellectual brain teasers on fake tanning lotion?"
"Harm's gone. Left."
"Oh woe is me." Xander paused. He didn't think Spike and Harmony were the love affair of the century but he couldn't help but empathise with Spike a little bit. "Are you heartbroken?"
"Well wouldn't you be, not knowing where your next shag is coming from?"
Okay apparently not even the love affair of the hour. So much for empathy. "And the mystery of Harmony's departure deepens."
"Yeah like you were interested in demon girl for her mind."
Xander felt like he'd been punched. How did Spike know these things when nobody talked to him? Suddenly the avoidance option was looking mighty appealing, and he shook his head, turning to walk away.
"Hold on there mate not going without your beer are you?"
"What?" Xander turned to see Spike holding out a beer to him.
He looked at him suspiciously. "What did you spit in it?"
Spike rolled his eyes "Oh please. Give me some credit, piss in it maybe, here have this one then."
Spike passed him the other bottle, Xander took it and looked at it warily before shrugging and taking a deep swallow.
"Why are you buying me beer?"
"Well us heartbroken types have to stick together. Plus a blokes gotta look after his nummy treat." Spike lowered his voice to an almost growl, accompanying it with a long, slow look up and down Xander's body.
Xander almost choked on his beer, Spike wasn't, he couldn't be checking him out could he? Of course he wasn't. No. Not SPIKE. That was crazy thinking. It was just the song. That was it. Some slow achy song had come on and bodies were pressed together, swaying on the dance floor. Making him imagine stuff.
"Well much as I enjoy our little chats Spike, and when I say that I'm lying, why don't you tell me what you want?"
"What I want?" Spike repeated slowly, "what do you think I want?"
"A chance to perform live with Billy Idol?"
Spike rolled his eyes. He was going to have to step this up a bit. Shock him out of that joke reflex of his. He took a step closer, pleased to see Xander didn't back away.
Looking for that special someone new And hey babe it might as well be you "Just thought we could cheer each other up a bit. You're better off without her, mate"
Xander's eyes were drawn to the movement of Spike's fingers. They were rubbing up and down the neck of his bottle. Up. Down. Circling the tip.
"Women, waste of time. Best find your kicks somewhere else."
Was there a reason Spike was standing so close to him?
Was there a reason he wasn't moving away?
The dance floor illuminates And there you are again
"Hmm?" Xander was still staring at Spike's fingers, almost hypnotic.
"Lot's of possibilities in the world today, be a shame if two blokes like us couldn't find something else to do."
They say you're looking lonely babe And they've been looking to
"Spike what are you talking about?" Yes good. Words are good. Those words were good, except maybe he could have said them less huskily and more firmly.
Spike lifted his beer to his lips, wrapping them around the rim of the bottle and taking a drink. Xander watched at he swallowed long and deep, then dropped the bottle to his side, running his tongue along his lips. Like it tasted good. Too good to waste. Now the smoke was getting heavier, and he could still kind of see other people through it, all pressed up against each other, but the only thing he could see clearly was Spike. Like they were in a private little world. And through the fog that love creates The night is filled with all the usual mistakes
"Just saying is all." Spike began to circle slowly around Xander, "Doesn't do to be all frustrated when there are ways to find release."
Now Spike was standing behind Xander and breathed the last two words in Xander's ear. Xander flinched as the puffs of air hit his skin. Maybe not a flinch. Maybe more like a tense shiver, and what the hell was Spike *doing*?
I'm looking for something, and anything will do So hey babe it might as well be you
And now everything was feeling thick, and heavy and slow, except his heart. That was thumping away very quickly thank you. And now Spike was in front of him again. Smiling, looking very satisfied with whatever he was seeing on Xander's face.
"Don't you think?"
Spike was looking at him, looking him up and down again. Looking at him with something like, anticipation, interest. Curiosity. Like he was waiting. Waiting for Xander to say something. As he should. Spike had just asked him a question. But he wasn't sure what the question was. Or what his answer would be, and maybe Spike was just suggesting that they go patrolling or something, but he doubted it. Him and Spike were parallel lines that never . . um . . touched.
So let me in tonight And we two losers might start to win
Xander very slowly set his beer bottle down. Carefully. Like it might just shatter. And now was the time to say something witty and get out of here because maybe it was just his imagination but there was a seriously bizarre *feeling* here and he had better things to do than go along with whatever twisted game Spike was playing. Okay he didn't but still, enough was enough, but the best he could manage was a husky, "I'd better go now."
Spike half smiled. "Alright then."
But Xander couldn't move, just looking at Spike. Like he was waiting for something. Spike flicked his fingers casually towards the door.
"So go." Those words broke whatever the hell kind of hypnotism Spike was working and Xander found all limbs were present and correct, awaiting instruction.
And it might as well be you that I cling to
"Yeah, um, bye." And he stumbled towards the door, not looking back, no not at all, except when he's almost out the door he couldn't help but look back, and Spike was looking after him, like Xander somehow knew he would be, but he kept on going, and didn't stop until he got home.
And in the Bronze Spike grinned and ordered another beer. This was going to be easier than he thought.
Part ThreeSpike winced in anticipation as the demon hurled him at the wall. Groaning inwardly as he hit the wall he turned back to the demon and gave it a half hearted kick to incite it to get a few good punches in on his face.
Fortunately it was only a Telcot demon, more slime than strength, which was good, wouldn't be any fun trying to work his magic if he was on the point of collapse, but still enough was -ow!- enough and he finally let loose on the demon, punching and kicking viciously before grabbing it and snapping its neck. Shaking himself out he tenderly probed at his face. Unfortunately it was necessary to be convincing tonight, shame he couldn't see himself, but he certainly *felt* convincing especially where a claw had caught his cheek. Yep and his nose was bleeding.
"Nice one mate" he said, stepping over the dead demon lying at his feet. "Sorry about insulting your sister like that."
With that he set off towards Xander's apartment. He hated to admit it, but he really was pretty excited about tonight. Well why shouldn't he be? If all went well, tonight would be the first step in screwing the whelp physically, while sticking it to the Slayer metaphorically. A small voice whispered he'd still rather forgo the whelp and have the girl. Hey, he admonished himself, none of that! Hate her. Hate her. Gonna make her and her friend bloody cry. You had your chance bitch now Xander's paying the price.
Having sex with Xander wasn't a problem, vampires could get it up with the tooth fairy if she winked at them. Besides he'd only have to imagine Buffy crying to get hard. As for the whelp. Well. He was certainly up for a walk on the gay side. Spike was willing to bet large amounts of the cash he didn't have that Xander had tossed off to the memory of that conversation in the Bronze at least once, against his better judgement of course. Spike was also willing to double the bet that Xander had never even attempted to explore this side of himself.
Humans. Always so bloody uptight. Still it was working out better for him so why worry? Vulnerability. Such a useful thing to use. Keep him off balance and he'll soon be flat on his back, or his stomach. Whichever Spike preferred really.
Spike entered the foyer to Xander's building. None of those annoying Scoobies were about tonight, he'd checked. He paused for a moment, this had to go just right, before anything else he needed an invite. It wouldn't do for the idiot to open the door to see Spike grinning all over his face. Okay, lights, camera, action! He began hammering on the door.
Xander had been half watching T.V half dozing on the couch when a thunderous knocking jerked him up.
What the . . .?
He hurried to the door to see Spike in a dishevelled bloodied mess on the other side.
"Spike!"
"Invite me in!!" Spike threw a desperate look over his shoulder /Should get an award for this/. "They're right behind me!"
"Come in!"
Xander grabbed Spike and pulled him into the apartment, not seeing the quick smile that flashed over Spike face as he checked the corridor for any nasties. When he turned back Spike was leaning against the wall, looking like he might faint.
"What was it?"
"Vamps. Don't worry, now they know they can't get in they'll go." He closed his eyes and began to slide down the wall.
"Woah, come here" Xander slung an arm around Spike and led him into the front room, sitting him on the couch.
"What happened?"
"Was out looking for something to pound on, got back to the crypt and a bunch of them were waiting for me, said they didn't hold with me working with the Slayer, killin' me own kind. Fought as long as I could, but there were too many, had to leg it but they chased me then I realised I was by your place."
Xander felt a pang of sympathy that unknown to him was written all over his expressive face. It looked like they'd given Spike a good working over. He could have been killed.
Spike noted the sympathy, physically biting his tongue not to yell "I don't want your bleedin' sympathy you useless git!" Slowly, slowly.
Xander regarded Spike wincing at the state of his face.
"That looks pretty nasty, you'd better get yourself cleaned up."
"What looks pretty nasty?"
"Your face, your nose is bleeding and you've got a gash on your cheek."
Spike snorted, "I can't see what I'm doing can I? You'll have to do it."
"Me! Why do I have to . . .oh forget it, I don't even have the energy to fight about it. Go and wash your face, and next time try running in the direction of Giles' place."
"Yeah, next time I'm trying to shake off a pack of vampires baying for my blood I'll ask if they wouldn't mind turning round while I run for help." Spike retorted as he heaved himself off the couch and headed for the bathroom. Xander didn't bother responding, but busied himself pulling out his first aid kit, well not really a kit, more of a case, and finding the things he might need.
Spike wandered back in drying his face gingerly.
"Sit down" Xander said not looking at him. Spike sat back down on the couch, and oh God. Spike had taken his shirt off, Xander's eyes widened as he traced the pale skin, defined muscles, the dark hard nipples, to the narrow waist where the thin line of hair led downwards, disappearing into his jeans . .
.Xander wrenched his eyes away, and looked quickly at Spike to see if he'd noticed, Spike's clear blue eyes were amused as they met his.
Xander flushed, cleared his throat uncomfortably then began to dap at Spike's cuts with antiseptic.
"They looked worse than they were" he said, more to break the silence than anything else. He felt very awkward for some reason. He'd sat like this a million times with Buffy, Giles and Willow, patching them up and being patched up, but for some reason Spike was making him desperately uncomfortable. Maybe it was the way he wasn't taking his eyes from Xander's face. Maybe because none of the others ever took their tops off. Maybe it was the way Spike's knee kept brushing against his. Or maybe it was the memory of that bizarre night at the Bronze, which Xander had studiously *not* been thinking about, because there was nothing to think about. Spike had not been coming on to him, and even if he had, weird homo vampire that dyed his hair, Xander had done the manly thing and run away. So there was no reason to think of it when he was lying in his lonely bed.
Yeah. Right.
With fingers that shook slightly Xander fixed a small plaster to Spike's cheek, pulling back as quickly as he could.
"Will this even help? You know with the undead healing thing?" He asked as he tried to cover his discomfort, concentrating on replacing the items in the case.
Spike didn't answer.
"Spike?" Xander turned back to him. And Spike had scooted a little closer to him, as Xander turned they were practically eyeball to eyeball. Xander inhaled sharply, smelling the smoke and danger, the *scent* of Spike that until now he hadn't even realised he knew so well.
His heart in his mouth Xander leapt to his feet, putting half the room between them. "So, you can go now okay?" Xander said hurriedly. /Get him out, get him out, get that freaky vampire *out*/
"Go! How can I bloody go? They'll be waiting for me, can't even go back to me crypt, I'll have to find somewhere else, and get a new bleedin' telly."
Xander stared at him with dawning dread, "No, no way you can't stay here!"
"One bloody night. Come on Xander, it's not how I wanted to spend the night either, but it beats being tortured to death."
Xander ran his fingers through his hair. /Why me?/ "Fine. One night. And you're on the couch."
Spike raised an eyebrow, "Well, duh. What did you have somewhere else in mind?"
Xander flushed." No! Just making it clear, that all." /Stupidstupidstupid/
Spike's lips twitched. "Well a lot of things are becoming clear to me mate."
/Not going to ask. It'll only encourage him. Don't want to know./ Again, enough was enough, it seemed to be his standard reaction around Spike lately and it was far too late for exchanging barbed comments and insults.
"I 'm going to bed," he announced, not meeting Spikes eyes.
"Want me to tuck you in?"
"You know I'm doing you a favour . . ." Xander trailed off as Spike stretched his arms out along the back of the couch and slung his feet up on the coffee table, regarding Xander mockingly. Xander wanted to yell "Get your feet off my table you undead prick" but the power of speech had temporarily deserted him. His eyes travelled along the long lines of Spike's body casually sprawled out for him to see then looked away, ashamed of himself.
"Goodnight Spike." He muttered between clenched teeth as he closed his bedroom door.
Spike gave him less than an hour before he came out again.
Part FourIt was another of those nights. Hot, restless, fidgety, pissed off in a tired kind of way, because he just wanted to go to sleep, and wake in the morning, when he would be, hopefully, seeing clearly, in more ways than one, but he was still lying awake, staring up at the ceiling.
And it was oh so dark in here.
Sleep was a million miles away, no matter how tired he may be, he had a lot on his mind. Well he had a certain vampire on his mind.
And a painful hard on that did not want to go away.
It just throbbed harder in response every time Xander thought of Spike stripped to the waist, sitting so close to him he could *smell* him. Xander groaned silently to himself. He was so ashamed of himself. Not the guy thing. That was something he'd always kind of known about himself, but that for some reason it was directed at Spike. Spike! Again his body stirred restlessly at the thought of him, and a surge of lust, faintly mingled with revulsion flooded through him.
And what the hell kind of game was Spike playing anyway? Probably Spike had sensed Xander's attraction to him and was just playing games with Xander's head.
But Xander hadn't really thought of Spike like that seriously. Not when there were girls around to divert his hormones nicely. Just every now and then it kind of hit him, like when he'd been tied to the chair in Xander's basement. For a brief moment he'd wondered what would happen if just for once they put all that energy they expelled fighting into something else. Wondered what would happen if he slid onto Spike's lap, wondered if kissing Spike deeply would shut him up. Would he respond? The thought was painfully exciting, but he'd shaken it off at once.
But it was only lately, only since that night in the Bronze that he'd been thinking about Spike constantly. The night that Spike had started it! /God, sound like a five year old much?/ The night when he'd come home and dreamed about Spike pushing him down on the bed, pulling off his clothes. Moving back to look at Xander, at his body, those cold blue eyes, hot now, registering approval with what they saw. Their bodies pressed flush against each other, Spike leaning down to kiss him, ravaging his mouth, Spike's body, rocking against him, against his cock, the words "ways to find release" in Spike's rasping English accent echoing through his mind. That was what pushed him over the edge. Waking up in his own sticky emissions, he'd wanted to die. *Kissing* Spike! Kissing *Spike*!
Even in a dream, what the hell was wrong with him?
Whatever it was it was still wrong and getting wronger. It didn't matter. One thing Xander was sure of was no matter how powerful his attraction for Spike got; Spike was up to no good playing on it. It would only lead to hurt. Just keep treating Spike as the enemy. Nothing was going to happen. Not now. Not ever.
But he was gorgeous.
And now the memory of that dream had only turned him on even more. He should just toss off and go to sleep, that was the sensible thing to do. That was what he would do. He slipped his hand into his boxers, stroking himself carefully, a shudder ran through him. He was so sensitive down there! He snatched his hand away. Couldn't vampires smell pheromones? If Spike was awake he'd be doing this to the accompaniment of sardonic remarks. Maybe he'd better check Spike was asleep.
With a long suffering groan Xander threw his feet on the floor and tramped towards the door. Peering around it carefully, he couldn't see a damn thing. Oh fuck it. While he was up he might as well get a drink. He headed towards the kitchen, casting a quick look in the corner of the room where Spike was just a dark blur, on the shadow that was the couch.
In the dark Spike's teeth flashed white as he grinned. About time too! He'd been waiting long enough. Fair play to the lad, he'd lasted longer than Spike had thought he would, he'd been lying awake for over two hours. Though the wait had probably just made Xander even more up for it. The rush of pheromones as Xander had opened the door had damn near overpowered him. For the first time a flicker of genuine interest in the lad passed through him.
He slid off the couch and slinkily made his way over to the kitchen where Xander was gulping juice like his life depended on it, the only light coming from the fridge where the door was still open.
"Trouble sleeping?" Spike drawled mockingly.
Xander stiffened, then put his glass down. He didn't jump, because somehow he'd known. Known that if he'd come out here Spike would be awake. But in the end he hadn't been able to stop himself, and, oh shit, Spike was only wearing his jeans.
"Just thirsty," he muttered, willing his erection, that was just begging for a chance to come back, to stay away.
Spike looked at him knowingly, taking in the rigid set to Xander's shoulders, the tension emanating from every line of his body.
"You're tense."
"There's a vampire on my couch."
"I'm the reason you're tense?"
"You bet you are." /And you don't know the half of it, or maybe you do./
"Remember what I said last week? There are ways to find release."
God as if he needed reminding of that particular little snippet. Willing his erection away wasn't working, he half turned away from Spike, hoping he wasn't planning on looking down any time soon.
"What you want to go patrolling or something?" Xander tried to ask casually, miserably aware of the quiver in his voice.
"No." Spike grinned to himself, it'd been fun watching Xander squirm, but it was time to get this show on the road. His voice had no trace of laughter as he said firmly; "Turn around."
"What?"
Spike lightly ran his finger down Xander's spine and Xander gasped sharply before he could stop himself.
"I said turn around."
The sensible thing would be to run, or say explain his arousal away by saying he needed a piss, or *something* but a mixture of miserable defiance and a feeling of sick excitement was flooding through him, and silently he turned to face Spike
Spike's eyes flickered down, then back up to Xander's face.
"Nice" he said huskily. "Shame to waste it."
And Xander's stupid, *stupid* body was defiantly agreeing with that, arousal was pooling in his groin and Spike was way to close to him, now, he was running his hand along Xander's arm.
And to his utter disbelief he felt himself grow even harder.
"What the fuck are you doing?" he asked in an appalled whisper.
"Obvious innit? I'm trying to seduce you".
"Don't". And any minute now he'd move away, somewhere his mind was screaming at him to run, but his cock was *begging* to be touched.
"You want me to." Spike said matter of factly.
"Get out, I've got better things to do than listen to this crap," he said strongly, but it felt like he was wrestling with quicksand.
"Like what? The witches are off workin' their spells, Buffy's battling evil and doesn't need you gettin in the way. Hell even the Watchers gettin more action than you Xander, the only thing you've got is this place, and yeah it's nice, but it's nothing. Its empty".
"Is this your usual method of seduction? Cos on you it's still coming across as being a hurtful loser." And his mouth, oh his mouth was still on autopilot, still saying the things it would normally say, but oh, every fucking nerve fells like it's jumping up and down, and every inch of skin is begging to be touched, and if Spike doesn't stop wasting time on his stupid arm and slide that hand into his boxers Xander just might do it for him . . .
"I'm not trying to be nice, I'm being honest. The only person who really made you feel wanted and needed was your demon. But she's gone now and you don't think anybody will ever want you or need you again, but I do Xander. I want to nail you to the mattress and fuck you into oblivion, I need you Xander. Let me use you. Use me. Fuck ME".
And oh not a shiver now, past shivers, this was like a blast of confused desire just ripping through him that Spike must surely be able to SMELL but this is just a game, just a twisted *game* . . .
"This, this is just a game to you".
"A game? You think I don't want you? Give me your hand."
"No." But his fingers twitched. Just at the ends.
Moving very slowly Spike moved his hand, taking Xander's placing it on the bulge in his jeans. And Xander looked down at his hand, like it was disconnected from him. It had to be. It couldn't be him rubbing his hand along Spikes erection like that. Squeezing gently.
"I want you so bad I can taste it. I want to shove myself so far up you so hard you won't be able to sit down for a week."
"Oh. Oh fuck." Squeezing a little harder now, and Spike just rocking into him.
"Yeah," and Spike's voice made Xander look up and there was that damned smile that was somehow a sneer. "That's the plan."
And Xander froze as Spike's mouth descended on his.
Part Five
Spike's lips were cool, hard. His tongue rough, lapping at Xander's closed mouth, making small noises of frustration that Xander wasn't letting him in.
/Come on you bloody poof for Gods sake, just let go/. A surge of anger raced over him, it was bad enough he was having to do this at all, he didn't need the lad to stand there like a stuffed dummy while he was working his magic. /Should be pleased about me usin' him, it's the only chance he'd ever have with me, and does he bloody appreciate it?!/His hands tightened on Xander's shoulders then he suddenly shoved Xander, hard so he was pressed against the wall. Xander's eyes were wide with shock, but he could still smell the lust emanating from him and it calmed him a little.
Oh yeah the lad wanted him alright, he was just working through a 'I- shouldn't- let- this- happen' hangup. Spike revised his plans for the night with lightening speed, obviously a full on fuck was out of the question, the whelp was still way too nervous, needed a little time, but still a little taster should get him tickin' over nicely. . . .
Spike moved close so his body was hard against Xander's and returned to the fray. Letting his hand brush lightly against Xander's cock an involuntary groan and thrust from Xander had Spike smiling to himself, /that's it you slut, but if you think I'm gonna toss you off before you start showing a bit of involvement you're very much mistaken/. Ignoring Xander's whimper he moved his hand to Xander's hip, moving his thumb in soothing circles.
Xander couldn't understand why he felt so hot. A cold wall pressed against his back, a cold vampire pressed against his front but he felt like he was hovering on the edge of meltdown. Burning. Spike's mouth was on his neck now, mouthing frantically his hands running swiftly all over him except where he needed it most and suddenly Xander's body had evidentially decided that this standing frozen thing wasn't enough anymore, and this must be what an out of body experience felt like, because surely that couldn't be him grinding his hips into Spike, not caring that the jeans were chafing on sensitive skin, couldn't be him desperately clawing at Spike's back, couldn't be him making those moans, definitely couldn't be him muttering those words "want you, always wanted you".
He wouldn't do something like this, therefore it couldn't be happening, except it was and Spike's mouth was back on his and stupid, stupid Xander couldn't help it, couldn't, he moaned under Spike's mouth, opening his own, with a grunt of satisfaction Spike swept his tongue in for the first time, not exploring, not gentle enough for exploring more like claiming, and Xander was kissing back just as hard, and he could taste blood from somewhere and his lips hurt, and it almost felt like Spike was grinning as they were kissing, but he'd started now and nothing in the whole damn world was gonna make him stop. Spike's hand was moving down now, and Xander's bad, mean body was rocking harder, trying to get Spike to touch him, but Spike apparently had other ideas, Xander pulled back, panting as Spike unbuttoned his jeans and pulled his own erection free.
Xander's eyes swerved down then back up, appalled, for a second slipping out of this world that was nothing but cold wall and hard mouths and unbearable painful lust, the thought /what the hell am I *doing*!/ crashing into him, but then Spike grabbed his hand, placing it on his erection.
"Touch me," he said hoarsely.
Oh and those sweet words had him drowning in this all over again, and never before had those words sounded so fucking *sexy*, just because it was Spike asking Xander for something, but he still couldn't look at Spike while he was doing it. Xander closed his eyes and leaned his head on Spike shoulder ashe began to move his hand, tentatively at first, but the feel of Spike in his hand was turning him on even more, the contrasting sensation of silky skin covering the hardness /Spike's hardness! Spike wants ME!/, and he began to move faster, closing his hand more tightly around Spike, maybe trying to show Spike this was what he wanted Spike to do to him, and he was out of control hard, and could just come from this, just from feeling Spike, but oh God how he wants to be touched and his cock is jumping and aching for Spike and he wants to say that but he's too shy, and the only way he can get it across is to try to show Spike by pumping his hand faster and sucking on Spike's neck harder and using his free hand to steady Spike's hips that are bucking faster and harder, and Xander couldn't help but let out a moan of frustration because he wants to be where Spike is and he's pumping, pumping, pumping, his wrist is aching now, and fuck knows how long he's been doing this for, but he can't stop, won't stop, because now Spike's shuddering and thrusting harder and he wants to make Spike come, right now, and he wants Spike in his mouth and up his arse and this isn't nearly enough and he wants wants wants, and now his hand is a blur on Spike's cock, and Spike is biting down hard on Xander's shoulder, and his fists are clenched on the wall on either side of Xander and suddenly the smell of Spike's come hit the air as he spurted his lukewarm orgasm over Xander.
Spike gasped as he came hard over Xander's hand, thrusting into him until it was over. For a moment he stood there, leaning heavily on Xander, too heavily probably, but who cared? He was feeling decidedly weak kneed and would've like to sit down, but Xander was pressing into him, still wordlessly begging to be touched, his erection still jabbing into Spike's stomach, and if he didn't give the lad something now, he might not want to come back for more. With an inward sigh Spike slid his hand into Xanders boxers and began to move it, hard, fast, it'd been fun making the lad go cross-eyed with frustration, but now he was finished he wanted this to be over.
Xander let his head fall back, banging on the wall, panting as Spike's slim fingers expertly moved on him, and now it was actually happening he almost
wanted it to stop because this was all way too much and way too good, and wasn't gonna last, couldn't last, he'd been waiting for too long, and he bucked hard, coming with an intensity that was almost painful over Spike's hand, splattering his stomach and chest.His knees buckled and he closed his eyes again, leaning against the wall, gradually coming back to himself to realise the fridge door was still open, and it was still semi dark, but his eyes had adjusted a little and Spike was leaning back from him, and his eyes were glittering with something like . . .triumph? Whatever it was it was cold, and Xander shivered, suddenly realising he'd done something incredibly stupid.
"See," Spike said at last, "told you there were ways to find release." He pushed himself away from Xander and went to the bathroom, and Xander dimly heard the sounds of splashing water.
Xander went to run his fingers through his hair, then paused, Spike's come was still on his fingers, ignoring the twist in his stomach, Xander wiped his hand quickly on his boxers, and was probing gently at his sore, swollen lips as Spike came back in the room. Xander stared at him, /if he thinks he's gonna sleep with me in my bed because of this . . ./ No way. He never, ever wanted to see the vampire again. But Spike didn't seem to even look at him, never mind want to sleep in the same bed as him.
Spike lay down again on the couch, his hands behind his head.
"You should sleep better for that anyway. Close the fridge door."
The what? Oh. Right. Numbly Xander did as he was told, and as Spike only seemed to want to go to sleep now he made his way back to the bedroom. He paused at the door, hating himself for asking, but he had to know.
"Are you, you won't .. . ."
Spike grinned, "Our little secret mate."
"Right" Xander slammed the door behind him and collapsed on his bed feeling bruised and battered beyond belief and shocked to the core.
Spike chuckled gleefully to himself. /Our little secret, for now/.
*Song Lyrics in part 2 taken from Del Amitri's 'It might as well be you'