Homeward BoundBy Buddy
Spike was getting a bit apprehensive waiting and he paced the floor for a while, then turned the telly on, and when he couldn’t relax watching it, he paced some more. As soon as he heard Xander’s key in the door he came to an abrupt standstill. Fuck it, he wasn’t giving the whelp chance to bollix it up, so as soon as he walked in Spike reached for him and pulled him into an embrace. Then his cool lips were on him, his tongue tasting his bottom lip, teasing seeking entry. Xander’s lips parted in surprise, he had expected awkwardness or something not passion.
No way was he complaining, he returned the kiss, his tongue stroking Spike’s. He put his bag down and curled his fingers in Spike’s hair, pulling him closer, trying to deepen the kiss. Spike was trembling, and his whole body felt as though it was on fire. He grabbed Xander’s hips and pulled him close so that he could feel his erection, and was rewarded with the hardness of Xander’s own.
Xander bucked against him, an involuntary movement that made him feel like a puppet on a string. He giggled in his head. Spike’s the Puppet Master. They broke off the kiss so that Xander could breath, and Spike was looking at him, searching his eyes. He could see lust and desire reflected there and a hint of sadness.
“What kept you?”
“I wasn’t so long. I picked up some blood for you; here. Also I rang home, well Buffy’s place and spoke to everyone.” He felt Spike stiffen. “I just wanted to let them know I was ok, and for them not to worry.” Spike felt himself relax a bit and hated himself for caring.
“Did you say when you were going back?” He kept his voice steady.
“I just said it could be a few more days. I know I have to face the music, but it’s gotten kinda interesting around here. I’d hate to kill the mood.” He watched Spike to gage his response, he had seemed uptight for a minute but now he was relaxing, which had to be a good thing right? He took a deep breath.
“Will you be coming back too?” Oh please don’t let him laugh at me or even worse say no. Spike’s mouth fell open in a round pout and he blinked rapidly three times.
“Yes if you want me to pet. Do you want me to?
“I do, I’m not sure what that means right now and it’s not going to be easy to be round the others. I do know I don’t want you to disappear from my life, I want to find out what this means. Plus, more sex please. Much more sex.” Spike tightened his embrace and smiled smugly.
“You can count on that ducks, just let me eat this and I can then inspect the other present you brought me.”
He cupped Xander’s erection drawing his hand achingly, slowly upwards. He kissed him again and then reluctantly let him go. He did need to eat. Xander rubbed his hand over his face and decided he was done with designer stubble it was itchy and he didn’t like the look anymore.
“I’ll just have a shave while your eating then. Won’t be long.”
He looked at the smoulder in Spike’s eyes and felt heat go straight to his groin. He knew that his life was messy right now but if Spike would just keep looking at him that way, he believed he could deal. He grabbed the back of Spike’s head and curled his fingers in his hair; he loved the feel of it when it wasn’t gelled to within an inch of its life. He traced Spike’s bottom lip lightly with his thumb and plunged it in his mouth as he parted his lips. Oh god the things he wanted to do to this man! Spike swirled his tongue around his thumb and slowly fellated it and then nipped it with blunt teeth.
“Go, have your shave, I’ll be just getting me strength back.”
Xander was glad the bathroom wasn’t too far away because he thought he would have trouble walking with the huge erection he was sporting. About 15 minutes later he came out of the bathroom and was proud to acknowledge that he hadn’t nicked himself too many times considering his haste. Spike disappeared into the bathroom for a few minutes and when he returned Xander was sprawled out on his own bed naked.
“Oh lookie here, I think Santa came early this year. I must have been a good boy though ‘cos I don’t normally get anything.”
Xander loved the way Spike moved, the rolling gait, the predatory stance; his movements were lithe like a jungle cat. He dropped to his knees at the foot of the bed. Lifting Xanders right foot he slowly began to nibble and tongue the instep, not too softly, he didn’t wish too tickle him. Then he worked his way up the inside of his calf, stopping to pay some attention to the back of his knee, and then continuing his trail up the inside of his thigh. Before he reached the apex of Xander’s thighs he switched and did the same to the other leg.
Xander allowed himself to relax and enjoy the sensations that Spike was causing. He had never really considered his legs and feet to be erogenous zones before. Ah he was nipping at his hips now, and torturously avoiding his expanded length. Dipping his tongue into Xander’s naval; he tongue fucked it for a while before moving on up, alternately placing tiny kisses and licks over his abdomen. As he reached his nipples he laved around the areola before biting gently at the nipple. Not wishing to be in any way neglectful in his ministrations he tended to both with equal thoroughness. Xander hadn’t touched Spike at all up to this point but now his fingers were curled in his hair and he tried to pull Spike up for a kiss.
“Now now, luv, be patient.”
He trailed kisses upward, pausing to nuzzle the hair that grew at the hollow of his throat. Then he laved his throat, letting his tongue feel the steady but quickened pulse and then worried the almost healed puncture wounds with the tip. Xander was gasping now and he wondered quite seriously if it was possible to come without his dick being touched. Spike stopped to look at him. Twin orbs of stormy weather, laden with desire and heat, searching his for what? He must have seen something he liked because now his lips were plundering his and his tongue was searching and then battling for dominance.
Spike sank down on to him blanketing the length of his body with his own. Xander moaned into his mouth as their cocks came into contact. He thrust his hips forward needing friction and Spike answered him with thrusts of his own. Spike slid down Xander’s body and engulfed his member to the root; he clasped his fingers at the base as he felt him stiffen to ward of the approaching climax.
After a moment he licked up the underside, tracing the prominent vein with the flat of his tongue. Once he reached the tip he gently rolled his tongue around the rim, before deep throating him again. He repeated his movements, then lapped at the precome that was oozing from his slit before dipping his tongue into it. Xander was grabbing handfuls of blonde hair now and watching as Spike’s head bobbed up and down. With a cry of “ohgodspikeargh!” his legs went rigid and he came.
When his higher brain functions returned he opened his eyes to a very smug looking Spike who kissed him thoroughly before asking him, “Like that did you Pet?” Xander was about to remark how skilled he was in that department and then it occurred to him exactly who it was the Spike had practised on. Despite the fact his penis was now limp it twitched.
“That was all kinds of wonderful.” He pulled Spike closer to him in a tight embrace, Spike’s erection still very not limp. He cupped his balls and stroked his cock and asked him if there was anything in particular he could do for him.
“Yeah luv, I reckon’ you could sit on this for me.”
They switched places and Xander reached for the lotion. He lubricated Spike’s cock and still stroking him reached round to get himself ready. He wasn’t tight, still basking in the afterglow, so he easily slid the first and then the second finger into himself. Spike watched him getting himself ready for him and presently couldn’t think of a prettier picture.
Except for this one, Xander was lowering himself onto him, taking him in inch by inch, filling himself, surrounding Spike with heat. Spike clasped his hips and bucked up, Xander grimaced and he waited for the chip to kick in with a nice migraine for his pains. Nothing.
“You ok ducks, did I hurt you?”
The rhythmic rise and fall of Xander’s ass answered him. Xander was half- hard again and Spike reached for him. Xander batted his hand away.
“Sorry, too soon.”
Spike sat up more so he could kiss him. He searched his eyes again to see if they held anything other than desire and he could see warmth there and quiet intelligence. Spike really hoped he was using it and had some idea of what they were getting into, because at that moment he fell in love with him. Utterly completely, stupidly in love with him.
He began to thrust up now, gripping Xander’s hips so hard they were going to bruise. Xander not so much moving now as bracing himself for the onslaught. Incredibly he was hard again and the closeness of their bodies was creating delicious friction. He was sore and oversensitive, but each time Spike hit his prostate, he forgot the discomfort and surrendered to the pleasure.
Spike grabbed Xander’s ass and manoeuvred their position until Xander was lying down. This was gorgeous but he needed to thrust harder and it wasn’t going to happen in that position. Xander put his legs over Spike’s shoulders and whimpered when he started to pump his cock in time to his thrusts. Xander pushed up, meeting him thrust for thrust and in no time at all Spike was howling as he came. The sound was primordial and sent Xander over the edge after him. Gasping and panting, then kissing and holding each other until they came down from it.
“I my friend will never walk again. I feel well and truly fucked.”
Xander stroked Spike’s hair as he lay on his chest. He looked towards the curtained window and realised it had now got dark. This moment in time he wanted to stretch forever. It didn’t feel in the least bit odd that it was Spike lying across him in fact it felt the most natural thing in the world.
Spike couldn’t speak; there was a lump in his throat he couldn’t force words passed and he was scared if he didn’t say something soon, Xander would guess the truth. He swallowed hard and took in a reflexive breath. Finally he managed to get his voice box working again.
“Glad you had a nice time Pet. ‘Course if you’ll never walk again, well that’ll just cut down on the time you spend on doing other things, when you could be doing me. And you do me so well.” He waggled his eyebrows.
“Was there some sort of compliment in there Spike?” Spike looked up at him.
“I love what you do to me and how you feel. Better watch out, I’m think I’m addicted.”
Xander thought seriously for a moment. Did he want William the Bloody mooning after him obsessively like he had Buffy? A few seconds passed and he realised he was asking himself the wrong question. The right question was what would he do now if Spike actually stopped wanting him? Then he realised that Spike was speaking to him again.
“…about when we go back? I mean what about Anya. Demon chick’s bound to come back at some point, won’t be able to stay away from the bloody store.”
“….uh?”
“Wake-up pet, I said if we get used to this, how’s it gonna work when we get back? I can just stay out of the way of the White Hats, but you can’t do that and then you have to deal with Anya.”
“Spike, I don’t want you to stay out of the way. Unless you feel weird, you know ‘cos of Buffy and everything.”
Spike looked up at him. Hearing her name still cut him like a knife, but he wasn’t stupid, the two of them as an item just wasn’t on the bloody agenda. He got that from what she had said when she told him was over. Also it was true what Xander had said, she never could accept the demon in Angel so what chance did he have? Is this why he was wrapped in Xander’s arms now, feeling the way he did? He laughed out loud. This was some kind of karmic blip he reckoned, just wasn’t sure yet whose karma.
“I’m dealing with how I feel about Buffy. I suppose deep down I always knew it would come to this, that she would leave me. I just didn’t think it would be so soon. I will always love her, ‘sthe kinda guy I am. I’ll probably love her forever, still love Dru."
”What about Angel?”
“I’ve already told you I never loved that poncy bugger.”
“Come on Spike, is he really that different from his alter ego? The one you knew, not the new and unimproved version that tried to kill us all.”
“He’s just so much of a buzz-kill, boring, vain, tedious, soul-having. Still he’s much more fun to wind up this way. Come on mate now spill, we’ve been dancing around it for long enough, what about Anya?”
“Oh god, she’s probably gonna kill me. No that will be too good for me. She’ll probably get that Halfrek chick to curse me with far worse than I got from the Shumash tribe, or turn me into a troll. Still Olaaf looked like he was having fun.” He groaned, not for one second stopping the delicious things he was doing with his fingers in Spike’s hair.
“I’ll go see her and take it like a man.” Spike swallowed hard. He couldn’t believe he was going to ask this but he had to know.
“Do you still want her?” He felt Xander’s arm tighten across his chest.
“I thought we pretty much covered that the first night you were here. I love her, but I’m not in love with her. I just should have spoken up sooner. Spike?”
“Yes luv?”
“Is this all over when we go back? I’m mean if it was just solace then you know ok, but you said you could get addicted and I think I already am. Or even if it is just solace, maybe we could keep giving solace to one another ‘til it feels better.” Spike reached up and touched the side of Xander’s face.
“There’s no way on earth I’m giving this up if I don’t have to.” He said softly. Xander felt his heart lurch and leaned over to kiss him. Spike pulled him in, his hand on the back of his head. They kissed for a few minutes until Xander broke away.
“Let’s have another night and day here, then head back tomorrow after sundown. I have to go in to work at some point, may as well start the week out.”
“If that’s what you want.”
“This is what I want.”
Xander reached down and stroked Spike’s already hard member. They spent the rest of that night and most of the next day caressing and stroking each other to satisfaction. They both noticed that at some point that last day, the lust they felt for one another was being tempered by something more and it was with real reluctance on both their parts that they gave in the key to the room and headed back to Sunnydale.
“Where are you going Spike, the bus stop is this way?”
“You don’t actually think I came on a bus do you?”
Xander’s mouth fell open. He hadn’t thought about it at all to be honest everything had been such a blur. Spike turned down a little alleyway and strode purposefully down it. Xander caught up with him in time to see him knock on a set of double doors and poked his head just inside as one of them opened.
“Ah, there you are. I’m off then.”
He went further inside and opened the doors up fully. Then he wheeled out his motorbike. The doors closed swiftly behind him and Xander had no time to see whom he had been talking to. Spike strapped Xander’s bags to the back and sat astride it.
“Ready gorgeous?”
“As I’ll ever be I guess. Can I come to you later after I’ve checked in with the guys? I would ask you to come to me but I don’t know if Anya’s gonna be there.”
Spike’s heart was singing. He hadn’t realised how much he was dreading this parting of the ways, mostly because he didn’t know when he was going to see Xander again. Now he did. He kissed him gently on the mouth, his eyes reflecting in the orange glow of the streetlights, which turned them to midnight.
“We both know there’s very little chance of Buffy stopping by now don’t we? I reckon’ you can come see me anytime you like.” For a minute Xander looked pained.
“I mean the coast should be clear, not that you’ll do ‘cos she won’t come round, you ninny. It’s still very trashed though.”
Xander let out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding. He kissed Spike one more time for the road and climbed on the back. Neither was wearing helmets but Spike stuck to back roads on the journey home and they managed to avoid being pulled over by the police. When they got back Spike dropped him outside his building. He gave him a lingering look and nodded to him.
“I’ll see you later Xander.”
Xander blinked. He couldn’t remember Spike ever saying his name before. Knowing it was risky and not caring anyway, he pressed his lips gently to his.
“You will.”
And then Spike was gone in a cloud of smoke. Xander looked up at his window. It was dark and looked forbidding. He had taken on the lease of this place to make Anya happy and now it seemed strange and not really allowed that he should be the one returning to it. He sighed heavily and went to pick up his bags and realised they were still strapped to Spike’s bike. Great start, good job his keys were in his pocket. He walked up the stairs to his apartment feeling oddly bereft of something. It soon came to him he had barely been alone in the last four days.
The air in the apartment was still as he walked in the door. He flipped a light switch and looked around the living room The AC was still humming slightly but he could tell that dust particles hadn’t been moved around. He had been gone for just over a week; Anya must have left pretty much straight after him. As his eyes alighted on the table he had sudden total recall of the mad singing and dancing gig they had done around it. It was a bittersweet memory and his eyes blurred a little as he smiled. There was no going back now, he had done what he needed to do, and all that was left was the fall-out.
He had half expected her to be there, or for there to be a note saying where she was, but a cursory glance around the place told him nothing. He had decided to change his clothes before heading out to Buffy’s place and there was a knock at the door. His heart skipped a beat. That couldn’t be Anya, she wouldn’t knock she would just come right on in. He opened the door and Spike was standing there with his bags. He looked a bit sheepish as if he hadn’t known whether to come or not. Xander pulled him in the door as soon as the invite was passed his lips, shut it and folded him in a bear hug.
“What kept you?”
“I didn’t think she’d be here, didn’t see any lights on when we got back an’ I waited a bit for any sounds of yellin’ and what not.”
Spike cupped both sides of Xander’s face with his hands before pulling him into a deep kiss. His cock was hard and he ached with longing for this man to touch him again. Xander came to a decision. Spike’s place was trashed after Riley and Buffy had blown up the egg-demons so he really needed a place to stay. Even if Anya came back eventually to talk there was no reason that Spike shouldn’t move in with him. Ok there was probably lot of reasons, but he would work through them, around them and stamp on them until they were squashed flat.
The biggest obstacle was Buffy and unless she was going to come clean with everyone about her thing with Spike, how much could she really object? Breaking away from Spike’s kisses to breath Xander wondered if he had had some kind of mental or emotional melt down and this was the result. He decided that if that was the case, he wished he’d gone bananas before now.
“I have to go see the others. Do you want to come with me?”
“That might look a bit odd pet.”
“Doesn’t have to, you could say you wanted to see Dawn and we bumped into each other on the way over. Haven’t you noticed things get kinda bent when you’re trying to hide stuff? I mean we are so worried that someone may cotton on to things being different that our judgements off. Going to see Dawn is something you did all the time last summer.”
“That’s true but things have changed a lot since then. Nibblet got her sis back and with mine and Buffy’s history, well there’s no way she’s going to buy it.”
“Ok, you’ll probably like my other suggestion even less then.”
“What’s that?”
“I know your crypt is trashed I want you to stay here.”
It was Spike’s turn to wonder if Xander had taken full leave of his senses. He stared at him. He didn’t look like a crazy person; he just looked very shagged and full of. Oh god.
“Why do you want me to move in here?” Spike’s whole being was tense waiting for the answer. Xander’s bottom lip crumpled. How could this be?
“I think I’m in love with you. Say did you put a spell on me?”
“If I did it must have backfired ‘cos it seems to have affected me too.” They both stared at each other. Spike watched Xander’s expression as the cogs and wheels in his head clicked over and slotted into place.
“Do you love me Spike?”
“I don’t know how it’s happened but I do. I love you and there’s room for you in my life if you want to be a part of it. Do you think there’s room for me in yours? Oh god, I sound like the Pouf don’t I? Stake me now!”
Xander was too busy covering him with kisses and stroking him everywhere he could get his hands on him. He pushed his coat off his shoulders and then removed his shirt. Spike felt heady with need and the rest of his clothes seemed to come off as if by magic. Returning the favour, Spike soon made sure that Xander was also naked and marvelling at the warm body before him, he knew he could never tire of this. To actually be this close to someone who was in the moment with you, because they wanted you and wanted you to want them; well it was the greatest aphrodisiac of all.
Erections straining for friction, tongues duelling, hands everywhere while Xander tried to walk Spike into the bedroom. Spike fell backwards as the back of his knee hit the edge of the bed and Xander landed on top of him with a muffled humph! Spike rolled them over so that Xander was beneath him and continued to stroke him everywhere with reverence and passion. There was no way this was going to be a slow display of love, they were both ready and before Spike could speak Xander was slapping lube in his hand.
“Gotta do me now. Can’t wait, need you.”
In hardly anytime at all Spike was sinking into him. The smell of raspberry scented lubricant assailed his nostril as it mingled with the unique smell of him and his lover. Spice, lemon and fresh sweat joined leather, tobacco and patchouli. Each thrust he made was met with force and lost in his desire and need, he almost missed the baring of Xander’s throat. He felt his face change and his cock became painfully hard.
Time stilled for both of them as he sunk his fangs into the barely perceptible wounds he had already made. Spike felt his climax slam through him as he drew blood, he pulled it from his lovers neck and taste burst on his tongue. This was better than the taste of fear, this was love, and want, and need and it was warm. Xander was thrashing under him, spraying warm semen across Spike’s belly. He willed his demon down and retracted his fangs, but he knew as he lapped at them to seal them this time they would leave a mark. Kisses, strokes and affirmations followed from both of them and the night was lost once again to love.
**********************************************
Xander was happy. He knew that the feeling could easily be blighted with complications, but he had decided to go with the flow and see where it would take him. His neck was sore and his ass felt abused, but in a good way. He wanted to finger his wound repeatedly; it felt like an erogenous zone. Luckily his shirt easily covered it.
He had decided to go straight round to Buffy’s house, from work, he didn’t trust himself to go home first, he just knew he’d never make it back out of the house. Standing in front of her door now, he almost lost the happy feeling, wishing only to run back to Spike and hide. He raised his hand to knock anyway but the door opened before he touched it. Buffy stood before him, looking better than he had seen her look since, well since she had been resurrected.
“Oh my god I’m seeing apparitions Willow, do you think the door’s all haunted again!”
“Hey, Buff.”
Deceptively strong arms were wrapped around him then and he was pulled into the house and subjected to hugs from all present and also squeals of delight from Dawn. He felt surreal again as he lounged on the sofa, drinking mochachino, trying his hardest to field questions about the previous week of his life.
“Where were you Xander, are you ever going to tell us?”
“No Will. If I give you that information I will have to kill you.” He laughed trying to lighten the mood.
“Well ok then what did you do? You can tell us that can’t you?”
All eyes were on him and for a moment he wanted to shout out that he had had wicked rampant sex with Spike and oh by the way he just happened to fall in love with him too, could someone pass the cookies please?
“I went into a bit of a fugue state for a while, drank far too much, but managed to stay out of trouble and pulled myself together enough to know it was time to return to the land of grown-ups. Dawn is it too late to tell you to cover your ears?”
“I didn’t hear a thing. I’m just glad you’re back and in one piece.” She beamed up at him. Buffy looked at Willow and nodded.
“What? What is it?”
“Anya left this.” Willow went to the dresser and retrieved an envelope from the drawer. Xander took it from her with stupid fingers.
“How was she, really, before she left I mean.”
“She was heartbroken Xander. I don’t think she’s coming back, the Magic Box has been closed for over a week. Giles called and it appears that Anya asked him if he wanted to buy her out because she wants to not be here anymore. I’m sure it’s all in there.”
Willows face had always amazed Xander. If she was happy she smiled with everything, even her chin. If she was sad about anything, the whole of her face seemed to slide south and he could have sworn the only thing that kept it from falling right off was her hairline. She was definitely heading southwards at the moment. Everyone was looking at him expectantly, waiting for him to open the letter. Buffy looked at him with round eyes.
“Are you worried that she may have her old job back?” All eyes turned to her.
“What, don’t tell me you all haven’t thought it too. I’ve only ever been left in the bedroom and I wanted revenge, so if I was ever left at the altar!” Xander winced as the enormity of what he had done was slammed home to him once again.
“I probably deserve it. D’Hoffryn was there so she had possibilities to go vengeancy again.”
“What happened Xander? Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not so much, but I suppose you deserve some explanation, I did leave you all to pick up my mess.”
He sighed, he needed to get passed all this angst and he knew it was selfish but he just wanted to be back with Spike and feel his arms around him. He would even settle for his snide comments right now, the ones that peppered any normal Scooby meeting would do just fine.
“I panicked I guess, but I just never got the chance to put the breaks on things until I reached the bleachers. I know I handled it all really, really badly there’s no excuse for that. I figure though that it’s better this way than waking up some day with us hating each other.”
“You don’t think she might ha!”
“Dawn, be quiet.” Buffy scowled at her sister.
“Sorry!”
“It’s ok Dawnie. Maybe she does hate me, but at least she’s not married to a guy who can’t give her what she wants.” He stared numbly at the envelope, then tore it open and read its contents quickly.
Dear Xander,
I can’t even begin to understand what went wrong and why you did what you did. It’s probably something to do with being human I haven’t caught on to yet, but my heart is broken and I don’t think I will ever get over the public humiliation. D’Hoffryn offered me my old job back and in a fit of sadness and a need for revenge I said yes. I have to stay away, because I can’t promise I won’t hurt you as you did me.
I don’t think there is any way back from this for either of us and so I’ve approached Giles with regard to buying back my half of the Magic Box. He’s clearly in a dilemma about it because he said “Good Lord” quite a few times, although that could be because he knows I’m a demon again now. I hope to return someday to find out what I did wrong to make you do this to me. When I don’t feel the need to make your insides turn to acid and eat their way through your skin while I get a pedicure I will, but for now could you just box up the rest of my stuff and I’ll let Willow know where you can send it.
Anya.
Xander ran his fingers through his hair. Trembling slightly he gave the letter to Willow to read. She read it and then passed it to Buffy.
“Do you think she will stay away, or should we hit the mattresses? Perhaps I should just leave, I don’t want to put you guys in danger.”
“Xander she loves you. She may be pissed at you right now but it’s obvious from the letter that she wants to not want to hurt you. If you know what I mean.”
“Hey I have a Diploma in Willow Babble, I always know whatcha mean.”
“Good so there be no more leaving. I swear people from this town just keep up and going. First Giles, then you and Anya, even Spike’s missing. Must be the Hellmouthy vibe’s finally got to them. Well perhaps not to Spike seeing as that’s what brought him here in the first place.” Xander tried to control the blush he could feel spreading across his face, but at least Buffy wasn’t looking at him. She was too busy trying to control her own.
“I’ve been by his crypt a few times, but it still looks obliterated. No fixing up going on there, perhaps he just found a new one.”
“Dawn, tell me that you haven’t been to Spike’s crypt to check up on him.” Buffy stood with her arms folded and gave Dawn her best Mom look.
“Only in the day time. Only twice. Come on Buffy I’m worried about him, he’s never taken off for this long, not since, you know? Not since you died.”
Dawn looked petulantly back at Buffy and folded her arms defiantly, unconsciously mimicking her sister. Xander hated knowing that Spike was all right and Dawn was worried about him, so he opened his mouth before he had barely had time to form a coherent reply.
“Don’t worry about Spike Dawn, I saw him last night after I got back. He was lurking in the doorway as a matter of fact, waiting to see if I’d show. Wanted somewhere to stay for a while, you know ‘til he could find somewhere new.” Buffy’s eyes were like saucers.
“Spike’s back, oh.” She squeaked and then coughed. “Please tell me you told him no.”
“How could I? His place is trashed, ok I know that’s partly his fault but, there’s more to that story than you know, or so he says.” Dawn breathed a sigh of relief. Buffy spun on her heel and began to pace the room.
“Bleached menace, why does he have to be such a pain in my ass all the time? Or in this case a pain in your ass.” Xander felt an inappropriate smirk fight to spread over his face at the visual Buffy’s words had conjured.
“Speaking of which, I should get back, make sure he hasn’t made off with the family silver. I take it there’s no evil afoot that needs fighting at the moment, or dreaded research to do? No, good. Buffy do you want patrol backup later?” He could feel his good mood returning, if she said yes, he was definitely bringing Spike with him.
“Nah, I’ll only be doing a sweep, checking for vamps. You are seriously in need of a lobotomy. What possessed you to invite Spike into your home, to live with you?” Xander could feel himself getting angry with her. How hypocritical could you get?
“Buffy, he’s proven himself, time and again. If he gets too annoying I’ll throw him out and Willow can do the uninvite spell, ok?” He watched her face as she forced herself visibly to relax. She realised she was overreacting as far as everyone else was concerned.
“Ok, I suppose. I’ll see you out.” Xander paused at the doorstep to say his goodbyes and just knew with the tingle running up his spine that Spike was behind the tree again. Grinning inwardly he decided to give him a bit of a show and a run for his money.
******************************************
Spike couldn’t resist looking around the place it was after all the first time he’d been invited in. A closer look from Xander the previous evening had revealed that a lot of Anya’s stuff had been taken but not all of it. It wasn’t that Spike wished to look in drawers or closets or anything, it was more checking out furnishings, pictures, nicnacs and that sort of thing. He was curious. He figured that much of the stuff had Anya’s influence. A lot of neutrals and clean lines, nothing like the basement, which had been an eclectic mix of teenage hero worship and forced convenience.
He had noticed that Xander’s clothes had calmed down a bit lately and he wondered if that was a natural progression of changing taste or again an effort to please Anya. He had to be honest though, whatever the reason it was an improvement.
After a while of fairly unrevealing snooping he had crashed and watched the television, pretending not to be impatient with the wait for Xander to come home. ‘Home’, it didn’t matter how many times he said it, it had an unreal ring to it and he wasn’t sure he should get used to saying in regard to Xander’s apartment. It wasn’t that he thought Xander was going to change his mind and throw him out, it was more that something always had a way of buggering up his plans.
His head ached a bit with all the thinking he had had time to do. He was exalted and scared at the direction things had taken in the last week. He knew that he and Xander would have to keep things from the others, at least for now but he thought he knew Xander enough to know that one day he would want to be honest with his friends about his relationship with Spike. Would Buffy think he was a total lightweight and that all he had said to her was lies? Not that her track record for recovery time between relationships involved huge lengths of time. Would she stake him for ‘corrupting’ Xander? Would any of them even take it seriously? Talk about a change of direction for the lad, not only vampire but also male.
Spike couldn’t resist a smirk to himself, they were a right twisted lot any way, Red had dated ‘Dogboy’ and now she was batting for the other team with another witch. Buffy just appeared to have a thing for the undead, people she couldn’t touch, or those who could never reach her. The closest thing she had had to normal had been ‘Captain Cardboard’ and well he was a few county lines over from normal by the time he left, visiting vamp whore houses. Xander had dated ex-demon chick and the lovely Miss Cordelia Chase who must have something up with her; she was working with his poncy Sire after all. Giles appeared to have a more traditional taste in partners from what Spike could discern, but then he was an old stuffy git who didn’t seem to take much interest one way or another. Wonder what he’s up to in the Home country?
Spike felt a pang of yearning for the old times, when he, Angelus and Dru had been a family. He supposed he should count Darla in the mix but he didn’t want to, it was more fun to pretend she had never existed. The thoughts of yesteryear didn’t last for long, he was getting used to the way his life was now and wasn’t entirely sure he would return to his killing ways if he had the chance. He had learned there are better things, greater things to make his existence worthwhile, such as love. In particular the love of a warm, generous, humorous, loyal and trustworthy human being. He had once told Angel and Buffy that love is a funny thing, that pearl of wisdom had come back to bite him in the ass a few times lately, first the Slayer and now her largely ineffectual side kick!
At least the Slayer had super strength, how was he supposed to protect Xander? It made him sick to his stomach to think of anything to happening to him. Maybe it was worth still trying to get this bloody chip out, just in case he ever needed to turn him. Spike had more than a sneaking suspicion that Xander really wouldn’t want that. On reflection Spike had to agree, he would still be Xander in a lot of ways as a vampire, but possibly none of the ones that he loved him for. What time was it and when was he coming home, he had plans for him? Spike glared at the television and suddenly realised what a stupid git he was being. Who said he had to wait for Xander to come back here?
He waited just long enough for the sun to go down and then he threw his duster on and left the apartment. Lighting a smoke as he walked, he made his way over to Buffy’s house. He would have got there much quicker but he decided to take out a couple of vampires along the way to satisfy his need to kill something, and he figured he had time. It didn’t really satisfy that need at all but at least it took the edge off.
He assumed his usual position on arrival, leaning against the tree in front of the living room window. The drapes were still open and he could see Xander, Willow and half of Dawn, sitting around the table. Smoke curling away from him; anyone of the occupants might have seen him had they a mind to look in his direction. Ah this was better than the telly, thanks to vampiric hearing he could hear most of what was being said, his ears pricking at the mention of Anya’s name.
He felt guilty for a moment when he heard the worry in Dawn’s voice because he had taken off without letting them know were he was going. Truth was though he really hadn’t wagered on being gone so long. He felt warmth in his belly at the reason for his extended absence. He unconsciously held in tobacco and oxygen when he heard Xander talking about his new living arrangements. Ditching the rest of his cigarette he scooted over to the window and hunched down so he wouldn’t be seen. Listening intently a grin spread across his face. He had to hand it to the lad; he could be real smooth when the situation depended on it, and the daft sods didn’t seem to think it especially odd, even Buffy hadn’t been as full of her usual bluster.
Eavesdropping was not his primary concern, so he scooted back over to the tree and slid behind the huge oak and waited for movement from the inside. Impatience had driven him here; it was too long since he had been near to Xander, his hands on him, tasting him, breathing in his scent, and no his cock was not hardening just thinking about it. One of the biggest reasons was that now he couldn’t get it out of his head how vulnerable Xander was. He always put up a good fight if he had to, but Spike would wager anything that it was only the Slayer and the luck of the charmed that had kept him a live so long. Fierce loyalty and a gung-ho approach to demons were all very well and good, but eventually it got you killed. There’ was no way Spike was gonna let that happen to Xander.
After a time they all started to move from the table and he caught his first glimpse of Buffy. He waited for the familiar ache to settle around his unbeating heart and yes there it was but it wasn’t suffocating him for a change. He was aware of the irony of a vampire feeling suffocated but after she had tried to end it the first time, he had felt like any human would have felt trapped in a room without air.
The front door opened and he stepped back out of sight.
“Are you sure you don’t want patrol company tonight? I could grab Spike and swing by later.” Spike could feel Buffy roll her eyes.
“That won’t be necessary, really. I’m of the good.”
They hugged one another and said goodbye and Spike could feel himself slip into game-face at their display of affection. Hell, he wasn’t sure what made him more jealous, Xander’s hands on Buffy or the other way round. The door was closing and Xander was walking down the path. Spike scooted further round the tree and as Xander swept by him he could have reached out a hand to touch him. He was off up the street now and Spike was left standing with his mouth open. *Oi, move git, you’re here to protect him remember! *
Xander kept a casual pace as he walked back towards his place. He knew Spike was following him and as soon it was remotely practical he planned to pin him to the nearest anything. He just wasn’t sure yet how to do it without Spike getting some warning. He increased his pace as he neared the alleyway between Rovello Drive and Richmond and slipped around the corner. He quickly scanned the area for vamps and other nasties and finding none, waited for Spike to catch up to him.