Chapter 7: Assumptions

William sat with his back against the tree, holding Buffy. Her body had become rigid, and she sat up after he had spoken. He realized he should have explained it better, but it was too late now because she was already standing up and trying to run off.

William grabbed her by the hand though, and spun her around until she was pinned between him and the tree. The tree’s sharp bark bit into his hand but he ignored it, and didn’t move. He knew if he did she’d just run again and he couldn’t let her. She halfheartedly tried to push him away but soon gave up and bowed her head downward. She mumbled something but he couldn’t hear what she’d said.

“Buffy, what did you say?”

“I said I’m sorry for questioning if you loved me but I needed to know. I guess I do now.” She sounded so much like a child, whispering her statement out.

“No you don’t know Buffy, you di...”

She interrupted with an agitated lilt to her voice. “William, I know perfectly well what you meant, you said it pretty clearly.”

William just stared down at her, and couldn’t help the smirk that came to his face. He couldn't believe that she wasn't listening to him. She alwasy seemed to do that with him. William hadeted it when she wouldn't let him explain. “You always were quick with the assumptions. Buffy do you know what assume means?” He watched her look him in the eyes and saw the fury of fire that started to swelter in her eyes.

“No I don’t, but I’m pretty sure you will tell me. Won’t you?” She told with a small growl to her voice.

He knew his answer would piss her off more, but his brain couldn’t seem to stop his mouth from talking. “It means when you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME.” He watched her whole face turn a bright red as she started gnashing her teeth. He saw her knee too late though; she brought it straight up between his legs. She then turned in a huff and started running away. Before she got to the end of the first row of gravestones, she again faced him.

“William, you’re the ass. That’s for sure.”

Buffy quickly left the cemetery. William watched her retreat as he leaned against that same sharp bark trying to catch his breath and push down the emotional pain he was feeling. He wanted to run after her and apologize. Once again his mouth had gotten him into trouble. He had thought he was losing her and automatically started closing his heart up. In doing so, he’d become an arrogant ass once again.

He had acted that way a lot after his mom had died, mostly to cut the feeling out. He didn’t want to do that anymore, but he guessed old habits died hard. Once the pain had subsided a bit, he started to walk in the same direction that Buffy had traveled. He knew that his walk was quite the sight, as he was trying to keep as little movement as possible from affecting his private jewels.

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Buffy could not believe that arrogant asshole.

After everything that had happened that day he had the audacity to break up with her and then call her names. At least he had gotten one part of that comment right. He was an ass.

She tried to figure out what had happened. She had never seen him act like that. He had always been really sweet but now she could see what Faith had probably seen in him. She had always liked the asinine assholes. She had just never thought he could be one of them.

Buffy knew she had to calm down before she reached her house, or else she’d upset her mother. She slowed down a bit while also ensuring that William didn’t catch up. She felt a little bad about kicking him that way, but she had been pissed. Her conscience was beginning to get to her a bit, but she was adamant that after his comment, he deserved it. As she got closer to her home, she quickened her pace and decided to enter through the back door. Hopefully everyone would be preoccupied in the living room and wouldn’t see her.

She made it as far as the top landing leading to the upstairs before she felt the familiar hand rest on her shoulder. She knew who it was and she tried to suppress the tears that came to her eyes. As she turned and saw the caring face looking at her she couldn’t help it.

“Oh honey, what’s wrong? Where is William?”

Buffy looked into Tara’s eyes and thought about what to say. Maybe Tara could explain what was wrong with William. So she told Tara the story of what had happened. She watched Tara’s eyes grow wider as she continued and by the time Buffy had recounted her tale, the look on Tara’s face had hardened. Buffy wondered if Tara had been taking lessons from Willow. The face Tara was sporting looked as if it could counter Willow’s resolve face any day, which was something with which you did not want to mess.

“That bastard.”

Buffy heard Tara say something about not worrying about it, and that William would be back to his old self real quick. Then Tara turned on her heel, leaving Buffy standing there in shock. Buffy had never heard Tara swear or at least not without blushing. Tara was one of those people that just didn’t see the need to use profanity. For her to use it in that way meant that she was really angry and Buffy knew she didn’t want to be William. She felt bad about it for a bit but knew that Tara wouldn’t hurt William, or at least she hoped not.

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William walked through the gate into Buffy’s backyard. He leaned against it for a bit and tried to figure out how he could fix this. He knew that Buffy had probably already gone to bed, but he knew he had to straighten things out with her. William started walking towards the back door; however, before he could reach it, he was hit on the head. He turned to see who had hit him and found Tara glaring at him. Gone was the smiling face and easy going demeanor she usually sported. In its place was a mouth drawn in a grim line and raised eyebrows. He knew she was waiting for an explanation. He guessed she had talked to Buffy. He also knew if he didn’t answer correctly that the evening paper she was holding would find itself plastered to his head again.

“You had to go and pull your safety out again didn’t you?”

He bowed his head at her comment, because that’s exactly what he’d done.

“Oh no you don’t, mister. You are not getting any sympathy from me. You know Buffy was crying when she came in? You couldn’t keep your mouth shut could you?” She continued to lay into him and he continued to feel worse. “I will not let you fall back into this behavior again, is that understood? You did this after mom died and you will not do this again.”

He watched as Tara’s eyes slowly started to glisten in the moonlight. He knew he had hurt her too. He could just imagine what thoughts were going through her mind.

He pulled her into a hug, whispering, “I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me but I’m not going to be like that again. I promise.”

Tara nodded against his shoulder then leaned back and looked him in the eyes. This time, all William saw was the love and the worry that she had for him. Tara smiled.

“Now I think you have a big apology to make, and don’t botch it up.”

“I wouldn’t...” He was cut off by her raising her eyebrows at him. “Okay, maybe I would.”

Tara nodded her head and moved out of the doorway that led into the kitchen.

William stood back and looked at her. She was turning into such a beautiful woman and he couldn’t believe he had actually thought about giving up all those years ago. It seemed almost too long ago that those thoughts had run through his head. He realized she was waiting for him to make a move, and the longer he stood there the more irritated she became. William decided he had better go and apologize to Buffy. As he passed Tara, he mussed her hair and then continued on. He heard her huff and all he could do was smile. She may have turned into a beautiful woman, but she was still his little sis.

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When he arrived upstairs, William found Buffy in the hallway. She had changed her clothes and looked like she was ready for bed. The only problem with that scenario was that she wasn’t anywhere near her bedroom. She was sitting on the floor with her back pressed against Faith’s bedroom door. Once again she had the pig in her grasp. He watched her closely. Instead of her looking at him like he expected, she continued to stare at the wall in front of her. William was just about to walk over to Buffy and tap her out of her reverie, when she finally spoke.

“You know I don’t know what your problem was but I’m not in the mood to fight right now. So maybe you should just leave.”

“Buffy I came to apologize. I know I was an idiot, but please hear me out before you send me away.”

“Fine.”

“Buffy, in the cemetery I told you that maybe we should break up. Well, I meant it, just not how you thought.”

“William, you are not winning any points here.”

“Okay. To be more specific, I did not mean that I wanted to break up, but meant that we should put our relationship on hold for now.”

Buffy turned and looked at him with a quizzical eye. “What are you getting at?”

“I mean since I have to go back to England for a month and a half, we should hold off on pursuing our relationship any further until I return. That way we both get some time apart and figure out if this is what we really want. In the last week we’ve moved really fast. This way we can slow it down a little. I don’t want you to have any doubts about ‘us’ as a couple.”

“That’s fine and dandy. I mean you could have dropped the hint a little better, but I can agree with what you’re saying. That still doesn’t explain you being an ass about it all.” She answered with a hurt tone that had a sarcastic twinge.

William looked down at his hands and wrung them together. “Yeah, well see.... I have a tendency to act like a total pillock when I think I might get hurt.”

“Pi..whatever doesn’t even come close to describing the way you were acting.”

“Would kicking me in the balls again make it better?” William chuckled as Buffy shook her head and began to smile.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that but you just had me so pissed off.”

“I know that I went about it all wrong but I really want to still date you. I think it would be good if we just slowed down a bit. If anything, it will give you time to come to terms with Faith’s death and realize that whatever is happening between you and me has nothing to do with her.”

“I think you’re right, but I will miss you William.” Buffy’s voice sounded like an overly sweet little girl and she chuckled. When William looked down into her eyes he could see that she had forgiven him. He let out a breath of air at that realization. He had been so afraid that he had lost her. He didn’t know why she had forgiven him, but he was grateful she had.

“Buffy, do you know how much I love you?”

Buffy sat there for a few minutes just starring in his eyes. She could see how much he loved her, it was all right there. “Yeah William. I know.” She watched his shoulders relax with relief. He then turned around and sat next to her. She watched his hand grab hers and squeeze it.

“So what were you doing staring at the wall? I don’t see anything interesting there.” Buffy giggled as William got up an inspected the wall closely. “Nope, nothing interesting here.”

“I was just thinking. You know after this week, I don’t think anything will ever be the same.” She watched William sit back down in front of her and was drawn to the emotions playing over his face. She was aware that he wanted to put her at ease, but she got the distinct feeling he wasn’t sure how to do that. Slowly, though, a grin made its way onto his face. He nodded sharply and grinned.

“I think we need to get you medicated.”

“William, are you trying to be a jerk or does sticking your foot in your mouth just come second nature to you?”

“I’m not trying to be a big meany. I’m serious. You need medicine. The good stuff.” Buffy was slowly getting irritated with William. She didn’t think he knew when to shut up anymore. He started pulling on her arm to help her stand, but she acted like a pouty two-year-old and sat with her arms crossed, not moving. Finally he just reached under her arms and threw her over his shoulders, fireman-style.

“Gosh you’re....” She interrupted him.

“William if you value your life you won’t finish that statement.” Buffy smacked William’s butt hard for good measure though. She could do nothing but giggle as William carried her down the stairs. When they got to the bottom of the stairs, she heard several whoops of laughter come from the living room. She heard Giles next.

“Dear Lord William! What on earth are you doing.”

“Medicating Buffy. She’s too gloomy.” Although Buffy couldn’t see his face, she could hear the elation in his voice as he spoke to his father. Then Buffy felt William’s hand connect with her butt. “Ain’t that right Buffy?”

“Eep” After a quick giggle from her, he turned on his heels and headed for the kitchen. Buffy could hear her mother burst out laughing again and caught a glimpse of Giles just shaking his head. When William dropped her on one of the stools in the kitchen, Buffy looked up and saw he was smiling from ear to ear. She couldn’t help smiling with him.

He bent down next to her ear and whispered. “See knew I could get you to grin.” It didn’t take long until those who were in the living room began to congregate in the kitchen. Buffy noticed that the numbers had dwindled down to just those who were close to the Summers family. Most of them where friends that had turned into family over the years. Williow stood next to Tara and Buffy's mom, oppisite Buffy at the end of the island. While Xander and Giles stood by the door. She was glad they were the only one's there, when she thought back to the whole scenario that had just played out.

Buffy watched as William walked around the kitchen, pulling stuff out of cupboards and drawers. Buffy couldn’t figure out what he was doing, but the others were watching him with anticipation. William suddenly stopped though and looked like he was in deep thought about something.

“Mrs. Summers, where is the strawberry topping?”

Giles once again spoke up. “William, what are you up to?”

A look of nostalgia crossed Joyce’s face. “Rupert let him be and just wait.” She pointed to where it was stored. “William it’s in the cupboard over there.”

Buffy still wasn’t quite sure what was going on. As William pulled the chocolate ice cream out of the freezer, everyone in the room who was under twenty years of age squealed. Actually, Xander also made a noise which sounded suspiciously squeal-like, but quickly tried to cover it up.

William then asked, “So, who’s in the mood for a Bloody Sundae?”

Buffy heard her mother start laughing again. However, Giles was still standing by the door with a perplexed look on his face. Joyce then spoke up. “Why doesn’t everyone move back into the living room and let William make the sundaes.” Everyone except William and Buffy did as Joyce requested and moved to the other room. William started dishing out the ice cream. Buffy watched her mother walk over to William and give him a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks William, for making me smile.” Joyce then left the kitchen to join the others.

Buffy, who had been sitting on a stool, got up and pulled William into a kiss too, but hers was not quite as chaste as her mother’s. “Thank you.” Then she started to walk toward the door also.

“Hey! Wait a minute! Aren’t you going to help?”

“You’re the one that called me an ass, what do you think?” Before retreating into the living room, Buffy saw William shake his head. She couldn’t help thinking how much he looked like his step-father when he did that. It proved more so that they were father and son even though they didn't share blood.

Chapter 8: Revealing the Past

A/N: In chapter two I made a typo. William and Buffy are four years apart not two. My beta picked up on this mistake and I just wanted to clear it up with all of my readers. Hopefully I haven't confused to many people. Well on with this chapter.
ttyl
bcdspuffy

Buffy sat in the living room, listening as everyone joked around. It seemed weird to sit here laughing and enjoying life, like it was just another day. It wasn't just another day, her sister had died. She felt that they should be mourning her, but that didn't seem right either. She was just so confused about all this, what she did know though was that Faith would have wanted them to move ahead with their own lives, even if it was without her.

Buffy suddenly wondered if Faith was watching down on them right now, and laughing along with them. Buffy couldn't help the smile that spread across her face with the thought of what Faith must have thought of her being thrown over William's shoulder. As she refocused on the conversation, she heard her mother explaining the history of the bloody sundae.

"By the time I had caught on that William was using the word 'bloody', my girls were too. So I outlawed the word; at least here in the house. Faith seemed to stop using it pretty quickly, but Buffy had come accustomed to using it. She kept getting grounded every couple of days because of it. Anyway, this went on for a couple of weeks, and Buffy slowly stopped using the word. It was about a month later, and William had shown up to drop Tara off at the slumber party for that weekend."

Buffy caught a movement by the door and looked over in that direction. There, standing in the shadows was William. She silently stood up and walked over to him.

"So where are the sundaes?"

"I figured the explanation might take a bit of time. So, instead of letting the ice cream melt, while everyone listened to your mom tell about our youth, I thought I'd just wait till she got closer to the end of the story before I served the ice cream."

Buffy just smiled. She couldn't help wondering how a night that had started out so badly had turned out so well. She turned around and refocused on her mother's voice. As the story continued to wash over her, Buffy leaned back against William. His arms quickly snaked their way around her waist and held her closer to him. She couldn't stop the sigh of happiness that slipped through her lips though, as she took in the comfort of being in his arms.

"So William saved her butt from another grounding by yelling out 'Yeah, Mrs. Summers, see it's a bloody sundae', as he drenched the ice cream in strawberry syrup. I don't think Buffy ever said the word again."

Buffy could feel the warmth as a blush took over her cheeks, and her friends all started snickering. She also felt William lean his head down next to her ear.

"Should I tell her how many times I know you've used the word?"

Buffy could hear the chuckle in his lowered whisper. She felt her cheeks flush again. Buffy wasn't sure if that came from her embarrassment, or the fact that the low pitch of William's voice had sounded so sexy. She quickly saved herself from prying questions. "Yes, well that was my youth. Now I'm going to go help William with those sundaes." She turned then and headed towards the kitchen. She knew that she had told William she wouldn't help but it was better then being questioned about why she was blushing.

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Willow stood on the front porch watching her brother. She had watched him slip out of the living room soon after the ice cream had been served. He had been quiet all night and she just couldn't figure out what had been going on with him. Quiet and Xander were two very unmixy things. She watched as he seemed to be talking to himself and then suddenly he just plopped on the ground and laid there. After five minutes or more and he hadn't moved she got worried. She silently walked towards him, so it startled her when he spoke.

"Willow I know your there. What do you want?"

Willow could hear a sorrow in his voice that she hadn't heard in a long time. She had wondered what would bring this on, but wasn't sure if it was in her place to ask him. She sat down next to him and started to pull out blades of grass. Willow hoped that Xander would just start talking like he used to do when they were kids. As the minutes passed by though, she realized it wouldn't be that easy this time.

"You want to talk about it?" she asked quietly.

He turned his head towards her and that is when she realized that he had been crying. "Not really. It's something I have to deal with on my own."

"Why?"

"Because I just do, and this is none of your business so just leave it be." His voice had slowly risen as he had spoken.

Willow could take a hint, but it hurt that he had been so short with her. "I'm sorry I just wanted to know how I could fix whatever was troubling you."

She watched him stand straight and harden his shoulders. "Willow, there are just some things you can't fix, okay? Listen, I'm going to go for a walk. See if someone can take you home. I'll see you in the morning if not before. I have some thinking to do." With that said, Xander walked away from Willow.

She just couldn't figure out what was wrong with her brother. She let the tears that formed in her eyes fall down her cheeks. They started to tickle her nose, where they were congregating, so she quickly rubbed them away. Willow wished she could fix all of this. The worlds of both her friends and family were slowly falling apart, and she couldn't figure out what she could do to fix it. Willow calmed herself down and decided to go back inside the house and find someone to take her home. As she walked through the door, she saw William first.

"Hey William, do you think you can take me home?"

"Yeah, sure Red, but where's the whelp?"

"I'm not sure. He wouldn't tell me where he was going. He seemed to be hurting but wouldn't talk to me." William looked at her quizzically. She knew that he had picked up on the hurt in her voice, so she quickly side stepped the whole thing. "So you can take me home then?"

"Yeah when you wanna leave?"

"Now would be good if you can."

He nodded his head. "Yeah. Let me tell Buffy so she doesn't worry."

"Sure."

Willow went to the closet to retrieve her coat while William walked back towards the kitchen.

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William wasn't sure what had occurred between Xander and Willow outside, but he knew that Willow had been hurt. He wondered what had happened but figured he'd not pry unless she talked to him. William walked into the kitchen and found Buffy standing at the sink, washing the bowls that had been used for the sundaes.

"Hey. I gotta take Willow home. You going to be okay while I'm gone?"

Buffy turned to him and gave him a perturbed look. "William, I'm not completely helpless. Although I haven't been in the best of moods here lately, I can take care of myself. So, yes, I will be fine while you're gone." Her tone was patronizing and William knew that he couldn't talk himself out of this. So he just didn't say anything. He watched Buffy's facial _expression and tone go from angry to inquiring. "Aren't you going to say anything?"

"No. I figured I'd let you rant and then I'd just do this…." He quickly pulled her to him and placed his lips upon hers before she could protest. She leaned into him as the kiss deepened. Soon he had to pull back to breathe and she leaned her head against his chest.

"I thought we were on hold?"

"Just reminding you what you're holding for." He tried to give her his best smirk and then he turned to leave. He did tell her though that he'd be back within the hour before he left.

When William returned to the front door, Willow stood there already in her coat. "You tell Buffy where you're going?"

"Yeah, you ready?"

"Uh huh."

He could tell that she was distracted by her thoughts again, so he just opened the door and let her lead the way. As Willow approached the end of the sidewalk, she walked right past the De Soto. "Hey Red, you missed the car."

"No I didn't. I figured we could walk, okay?"

William noticed Willow's behavior for what it was. She wanted to talk, so he agreed and stepped in line beside her. After about three blocks, he remembered why he didn't normally agree to walk to Xander's apartment. Willow had lived with her brother for awhile now. She had started by just showing up some nights when her parents being drunk just gotten to be too much. Ever since turning eighteen the previous February, she had moved into his guest bedroom, at least until she left for college later in the year. They had another two blocks to go, so he knew that she would start talking soon. He was right.

"William, does Xander tell you everything?"

"Not everything, but he tells me enough. Why do you ask?"

"Well he was acting all far away-ey tonight and I can't figure out what is wrong with him?"

Although this was supposed to be a serious conversation, William couldn't help the chuckle that slipped through his lips. "Did you hear what you just said?" Before she could answer, he continued. "I truly know that you have been hanging around Buffy too much." Willow left out a slight giggle too, but the feeling wasn't behind it. "So he's been acting distant then, right?"

"Yeah and he won't tell me what is bothering him. He says it's none of my business and that I can't fix everything."

"Well he's right about that. You can't fix everything. Some things guys just have to work out on their own. It could just be something that he can't talk about with you."

"Well, could you talk to him?"

"Me?" he asked "Nuh uh. Xander tells me things when he is ready. I don't go asking."

"Please?" Willow's face was sporting a pouty look that William knew he couldn't refuse. He knew Willow knew that too.

"Fine I'll talk to him, but if he asks, I'm telling him you sent me. Now come on. I'm taking you home before your pout gets me into any more trouble."

Willow's face brightened with a smile. "Thank you so much! You won't regret helping me."

"You're welcome. Now let's get you home." Under his breath, William began muttering about women and their pouts.

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Buffy was completing the task of putting away the clean dishes as her mother walked through the kitchen door.

"So where is Giles?" Buffy asked.

"He decided to step outside for a bit."

Buffy noticed her mother's nervousness but dismissed it, figuring it couldn't be anything that important. "So mom, when were actually planning on telling us that you and Giles had become a thing?"

"We had planned on telling you last week; but then this whole thing came up. It just didn't seem like the right time to reveal that Rupert and I were dating." Buffy nodded her head in the affirmative, and continued putting dishes away. "Buffy… speaking of getting things out in the open… we need to talk. Will you come and sit down with me?"

Buffy watched as her mother pulled a stool away from the island and sat down. Buffy wasn't sure what was going on, but she could tell that it was serious. Her mother had the same look on her face when she told Buffy about the divorce between herself and Hank, all those years ago. Buffy had stopped calling him dad a long time ago. She just couldn't stomach calling that man by any name that would elevate him to a place of importance in her life. He was never there for her through all these years, and she didn't see the sense in calling him something that he'd never been to her. Buffy was getting worried though, because that look normally meant life altering changes. Buffy felt she'd had enough of them lately. "Mom, what's wrong? You're worrying me."

"Honey, I have to tell you something and it's very important. I need you to listen to the whole story, so please don't go running out of here." By the end of the sentence, Buffy could hear the anguish and pleading in her mother's voice so she agreed.

"Buffy you're not my biological daughter."

The moment those words came out of her mother's mouth, Buffy knew that she couldn't have run away, even if she had wanted to. She was paralyzed by the shock of the statement. "What do you mean you're not my mother?"

"Buffy please listen to what I have to say and then you can ask questions, okay?"

Buffy must have nodded or gave her approval in some way because her mother, no not her mother - Joyce -- continued.

"Faith was four years old when I found out Hank had been cheating on me. I had started noticing small things. At first I truly thought he was just working hard, but when he missed Faith's birthday, I became angry and went searching for him at the office. I found him all right; with his secretary, on the floor of his office. I later learned that he had been cheating on me for awhile. I hadn't known what to do at first but I knew that I couldn't live with a man who had cheated on me. So I left with Faith for about a month before Hank had talked me into moving back, with a promise never to cheat again. It was about six months after that though when I found out about you."

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*Flashback*

Tringggggggg, tringggggggg, tringggggggg.

"Mrs. Summers I'll get that. You go sit down." Trina said.

Joyce could never seem to get used to having servants. If she was truthful, it twisted her gut every time she allowed them do something for her. She had always prided herself on doing things on her own. Now she had servants doing everything for her, even when she didn't want them to. She decided to listen though; she wasn't in the mood for another fight with Hank tonight. Joyce would have continued heading for the living room if she hadn't caught the sound of a sob coming from the direction of the front door.

"Trina who is it?"

"Nothing for you to worry about, Mrs. Summers. Just someone trying to sell something."

There was a sharp reply to Trina's statement from the individual on the other side of the door. "No! I'm not trying to sell something. I'm trying to see Mrs. Summers! It's important!"

Joyce wasn't sure what was going on, but she knew the sound of pain when she heard it. She instructed Trina to wait a moment and headed in the direction of the foyer.

"But Mrs. Summers, Mr. Summers gave me strict instructions not to let this women talk to anyone in the house."

"Well Trina right now I don't care. Let the girl in and I will decide for myself whether or not I want to talk to her. As for what Mr. Summers said, well let's put it this way, I will talk to him later." Trina escorted the young woman into the house. She was dressed in a denim skirt and a black tank top. Her hair flowed straight and stopped right below her shoulders, and her hazel eyes had become bloodshot from crying. Joyce suddenly realized that not only did the woman look familiar, she also noticed that the woman was very definitely pregnant.

"Mrs. Summers, I'm sorry to bother you but I had to try. You are my last hope."

"Yes, well, come in and sit down. You must be tired of standing. Do I know you from somewhere? You look familiar."

"I'm sure I do, but I doubt if you'll like the answer to that question." Joyce waved her hand for the woman to continue with her story. "I was your husband's secretary at one time." The woman stopped talking after that to allow Joyce time to put two and two together.

Joyce realized that this had been the woman on the floor with her husband seven months before. Joyce assumed that she knew what had happened, but she wanted confirmation from the woman. "First I want to know your name and then would you please explain why you're here?"

"Yes, I'm sorry I should have given you my name before I even said anything. My name is Eve. I know you probably don't want to hear this but I'm sorry for what I did. I don't expect you to forgive me or anything; but all I ask is for a few minutes of your time."

Joyce nodded for Eve to continue, and she told Joyce everything. By the end of the story, Joyce understood that Eve was just a naïve young woman who had gotten herself into trouble and didn't know what to do. Joyce contemplated how she could help, but wasn't sure what she could do.

"Mrs. Summers, all I ask is that you talk to Hank. I can't take care of this baby, but I couldn't have an abortion like he told me to."

If there had been one part of this entire mess that pissed Joyce off the most, it was that. She had never felt abortion was right, and Hank even knew that. "What is it you would like me to do?"

"I don't want my baby growing up not knowing her real family, even if it is someone like Hank. I realize it would be easier if I could raise her, but I can't. I tried to explain this to Hank but he told me he had given me my only choice. You were my last option. I will put the baby up for adoption if I have to, but I figured I'd talk to you first. I don't even know if you can do anything or would even want to, but I had to try."

Joyce could understand where the young woman was coming from, but she wasn't sure what she could do about it. She explained to Eve that she would think it over and get back to her.

Joyce had waited until Hank came home and then confronted him. The conversation had gone from bad to worse as they talked and yelled. At one point, Faith had walked in wondering what was going on. Joyce had taken her back to bed and explained it was just a simple disagreement between her parents. Faith had kissed Joyce on the cheek and said "I love you mommy, night."

That's when Joyce had been hit with an idea. "Hank, I want to adopt the baby."

"No! I refuse to do that! I told that woman what she could do with that baby and I meant it!"

Once again, Joyce became infuriated with her husband. "Hank, let me put it this in a way even you can understand. You will accept that baby and take responsibility, or I will make sure Eve has access to the best lawyer money can buy."

"Lawyer for what?"

"Well, she'll need child support to raise the little one, won't she? Believe me Hank, I will make your life as miserable as you've made mine these last few months. Oh, and by the way, Cindy called the house. You want to know what she said?"

Joyce watched as her husband's face turned ashen at the revelation that she was not only aware that her husband had yet another mistress but that she also knew her name! Joyce had become aware of Hank's latest conquest when she called the house and thought that Joyce was the maid! This “Cindy” had wanted to reschedule a date she had with Hank to another night because she had to go out of town. Joyce had contemplated leaving Hank again even then, but had decided to wait until she had talked to Hank about it. She had hoped that he had a good excuse; however, his face told her everything she needed to know. He had cheated on her. Again. "Hank, I think you should think about what I just said, and then let me know."

It hadn't taken long for Hank to agree. Joyce had even gone as far as to invite Eve to stay at the house until the baby was born. Eve had declined the offer, explaining that not only would it be awkward, but that she had already caused enough trouble. She had promised to call them as soon as she went into labor.

On January 19, 1982 Buffy Anne Summers was born. As Joyce held the little baby girl in her arms, she knew she had done the right thing. Joyce then went to see how Eve was doing, but learned she was discharged from the hospital earlier in the day, and had left.

*End Flashback*

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Chapter 9: Cheatin' all Around

Xander sat on the stool staring at a shot of whiskey. He knew he shouldn't have come here, but he had hoped to drown his sorrows. It had been after he'd paid the bartender though, that he realized what a mistake that would be. He knew if he came home drunk, Willow would probably not let him in his own apartment. So he just sat there staring at it, not sure what he should do. Over the course of the last year, his life had taken many twists and turns. He thought at one point he had found everything he'd wanted. He had become a cop just like he'd dreamed -- yes he was only a rookie -- but still, he was working his dream job. He had gotten Willow to agree to move in with him. Then he fell in love with the wrong girl. He knew when it had happened it was wrong. He had tried to tell himself for a long time just to forget about it. In the end though, he hadn't and had gotten his heart ripped out in the process. He took another long look at the glass and contemplated drinking it. Instead, he banged his head down on his crossed arms, and muttered one small sentence. It was filled with all the emotional pain that coursed through his body though.

"Damn you Faith"

"You loved her, didn't you?"

Xander knew who was behind him without even lifting his head from his arms. Once again the guilt was coming back in full force and he knew that it should. He had betrayed his friend and in the end his brain wondered if it had been worth it. Although his heart was already letting him know that even with the pain, it had been well worth the little bit of happiness he had experienced.

"Yeah I did." Xander waited for the blow that he knew he deserved, but instead all he heard was the stool next to his screech across the floor. He looked up then to see what William was doing.

"Hey Willy want to get me two shots and Xander another one?"

Xander watched Willy nod and then looked back at William. "If you’re going to kill me, I'd rather not be drunk at the time. Hell, what am I saying? Yes, I do want to be drunk. It might dull the physical pain you’re going to inflict."

"I'm not letting you get drunk. Willow would kill me."

"You didn't deny that you were going to kill me though."

William gave a bemused laugh. "I probably should, you know. Cheating with my girlfriend and all, but I won't." He paused as if trying to organize his thoughts. Finally he answered in a downhearted voice. "Xander, at least you gave her what I couldn't."

Xander just looked at his friend. He wasn't sure if he'd heard William correctly. As he stared at William's face though, he knew he had. "What do you mean?"

"I couldn't love her no matter how hard I tried. No, I take that back. I don't think I tried at all. I realize that now. I know it's too late but I do realize it."

"Yeah, but a lot of good it did me. Faith wouldn't let anybody near for too long."

*Flashback*

Xander was sprawled out on the bed next to a naked Faith. Faith skirted her body closer to his and then turned over to look him in the face.

"That was great." Then she reached over his body and grabbed the pack of cigarettes off the bed stand.

"Yeah, it was." Faith had continued to talk, but Xander's own jumbled brain tuned her out in his nervousness. They had been seeing each other for well over six months now. Well, actually their time together pretty much consisted of just sleeping together. In that time though, he had seen real glimpses of Faith and he knew he was falling in love with her. He wanted to tell her right then but had decided not to. He wanted it to be special.

"Faith, you doing anything this Friday?"

"No. Why? You want me to pencil you in?"

"Faith stop that. You’re not some whore that makes appointments!" He was disgusted when Faith acted like this. She was so much more then just a ‘fuck buddy’. She refused to acknowledge it though.

Faith sat up and just chuckled as she started to pull her jeans up her legs and over her thighs. Xander watched with great fascination. He could never get over how her muscles twitched under her skin with every small move. With her chest still bare, she crawled towards him slowly. As she moved, her breasts swayed in front of him in a hypnotizing fashion. He quickly brought his eyes to look into hers, and swallowed back the moan that had tried to escape. "So what do you want to do Friday?" As she asked the question, she had trailed her nail up the middle of his shirtless chest, causing him to shiver.

"I want to take you out." The moan slipped out amongst his words.

He watched her freeze up in front of him. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Because.... Well, because."

Xander watched Faith snap back and knew he had said something wrong. He quickly sat up and tried to reach for her, but she stepped out of his reach. He looked at her; he was hurt and a little perplexed at the way she was treating him suddenly. He watched her Throw on his blue button down shirt that he'd worn to work that day. He could just imagine how awful it smelled. His day had consisted of the mind numbing task of pushing paperwork in a stuffy hot cubicle. He wondered why she would even want to wear it. After a few minutes of silence, Xander thought he heard Faith mumble something.

"What was that Faith?"

"Oh, just that it's been fun but I actually have an appointment on Friday."

"What do you mean you have an appointment?" Xander couldn't believe what he'd just heard. Was she actually saying she was cheating on him?

"Exactly how it sounds, lover boy. You didn't really think you were the only one, did you?"

"Why, you bitch! You've been sleeping around on me?"

He tried one more time to just dismiss what she was saying; but he knew the answer to the question. He was pissed at her because she had played him. She had wanted what she wanted and that was all. He, on the other hand, had fallen for her and now he was the one who sat there holding his own broken heart in his hands. Xander had to admit that Faith had pulled the wool over his eyes really well.

"Why? You thought I'd cheat on William and not you? Oh, you did, didn't you?"

"You know what Faith? I just realized something. I always thought you just played the heartless bitch, but I guess now I know you weren’t playing."

Xander reached for his pants and threw them on. He grabbed the keys to his car and then slammed out the door. He stood on the other side of the door for a few minutes, leaning on it and thinking about what to do. Finally though, he made up his mind, pushed off the door, and continued down the stairs to the parking lot. Xander got into his car and started it. For a split second he thought about going back up to Faith’s apartment and trying to talk to her; instead he took one last look at the building where she lived and then left.

*End Flashback*

"That's the last night I saw her, almost two weeks before she died. Looking back on the conversation though I don't think she meant it. She seemed to be fighting herself every time she said something. I wonder if I had been able to see through my pain and bitterness that night, that I might have been able to persuade her. Maybe I would have been with her the night she.... It makes me wonder whether I would have been with her and could have saved her. You know?"

William shook his head and Xander could see that he had wondered the same thing. Xander turned around and leaned his back against the bar.

"It feels worse though knowing that the last words I said to her was to call her a heartless bitch."

"I know mate. I feel that I should pop you a good one in the nose for that, but I think you’re hurting yourself enough with that guilt."

Xander and William continued talking until Xander’s mood began to lift. "It seemed so easy right after you moved here and we became 'The Three Holdbacks' you know? The only thing we had in common then was the fact that we'd all been held back in school at one time or another." Xander pondered over his thoughts and then started talking to William again. "Makes you wonder if we would all be where we are today if principal Snyder hadn't called all of us into his office that day. I still don't see why he felt the need to threaten you anyway. I mean, yeah, me and Faith were slackers -- always had been. But the only reason you had been held back was because you had such bad grades after your mom died. He really was a jerk, wasn't he?"

"That I can agree with. We can't live on what ifs though. If we do, we will just be living in the past for the rest of our lives. Although I'd love to be able to say that if I hadn't gotten drunk maybe I would have been there, to save her. I can't say that. It happened the way it did all we can do is find her killer. Believe me when I say that whoever it is, they will pay for what they did."

The mood sobered once again with the thought of Faith being gone for good.

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William had made sure Xander got home after their conversation. It had hurt to know that Faith had been cheating on him with Xander. In the end though, he knew Xander was putting himself through enough pain, without William adding to it. He had decided with everything that had happened there was just no use in getting angry over it.

William parked in front of Giles' house. As he got out of the car, he thought he caught the glimpse of a shadow on the steps. He approached the front steps and moved so the light could shine on the shadow. He was taken aback when he realized that it was Buffy, and that she was asleep on the steps. He quickly checked his watch and saw that it was two in the morning. What was she doing here? She should have been in bed. William crouched down and tried to nudge her awake, but she continued to sleep.

"Should’ve known once you’re asleep, an earthquake wouldn't wake you up." He mumbled as he scooped Buffy into his arms. She roused a little but then snuggled into his chest. He looked down at her face; she was just a beautiful sleeping as she was awake. William couldn't help wondering what it would be like to wake up next to her in the mornings. He stopped that line of thinking though as his body began to respond to some of the images he'd conjured up. William resituated Buffy’s position in his arms so that he wouldn’t drop her, and went to the door. He was glad he hadn't put his keys in his pocket because he wasn't sure how he would have gotten the door open then. As he walked into the house, he kicked the door closed behind him. It made a banging sound as it closed and William waited to make sure Buffy stayed asleep. She did, so he moved on.

He laid her on the guest bed and slowly removed her fuzzy slippers. He couldn't imagine why she had come over dressed in just her pajamas and slippers, but he figured he'd hear the story in the morning. William then left the room to change into his own bed clothes. He figured he'd take his shower in the morning. He was too tired right now. After throwing on a pair of sweats and tying them off, he went to check on Buffy before going to bed himself. Instead of finding her asleep like he'd expected, he found her curled up tight against one side of the bed crying. William quickly lay next to her and wrapped his arms around her. He didn't know what else to do.

"Buffy, what's wrong?"

She didn't answer him, but he persisted. Finally she explained to him about what her mom had revealed to her earlier that night.

"I'm just so lost William. I don't know what to do. Why didn't she tell me before now?"

"Well, did you ask her why she hadn't?"

"No. I was so confused after she told me that I left and told her I'd be back."

"You should have stayed and talked with her. Come on Buffy. You of all people should know that blood doesn't matter. In all these years, we have all become family to each other. No it's not the conventional kind, but we are a family. Joyce loves you, whether you’re her biological daughter or not. I mean, look at me and Giles – okay, bad example -- better make it Tara and Giles. Giles and Tara share no blood but he has always been her father. This will work out. I promise." He watched as Buffy's tears began to subside. He knew that she was finally looking at the whole situation and not just reacting to the shock of it.

"You’re right, aren't you?"

"As always." Buffy smiled then and he knew that he had gotten through to her. Then she punched him. "Hey, now! What was that for?"

"Being a cocky know it all." She gave him a mischievous look and started tickling him.

"Hey...Hey....Stop.that.right.NOW!" She ignored his protests and continued to tickle him. William pushed up with his body and flipped Buffy onto her back. As he flipped her, he grabbed her hands and held them above her head.

"Oh no! Now I'm at the mercy of The Big Bad! Oh what ever shall I do?" Buffy cried out in mock terror.

"You faint like any good damsel in distress?"

"Nope! I fight harder." She started bucking her hips to get him off of her, but he was still able to hold her down. She continued to fight it though, so he did the only thing he knew would make her stop. He leaned over and starting kissing her. William was right. After a few seconds more of wiggling, Buffy finally gave into the kiss. As the passion built in the room though, William wondered if the kiss had been such a good idea. He was already a little uncomfortable in the lower area because of her wiggling. He quickly pulled back and started to stand to leave. Instead he was stopped by a hand clutched around his bicep.

"Don't leave please?"

He looked at her and knew that he had to. "Buffy, if I don't leave now..."

"William, will you just hold me?"

William thought about saying no but then he looked into her eyes. She appeared so tired and he wondered if that was what Tara had seen in him after their mother died. He would bet it had been. He wanted Buffy to get sleep and he was afraid she wouldn't if she didn't calm down. So he walked to the other side of the bed and slid in beside Buffy. He held her close to him, and ran his fingers through her hair. Before he fell asleep, he murmured, "Love 'ya."

Chapter 10: The Down's and Up's

William loitered behind Buffy as she stood in the doorway to her sister’s apartment. Buffy continued on in while William stood back and looked around the apartment. He noticed that the room hadn't changed any since he'd been there that day almost three weeks before, he even noticed a few things he hadn't before. Joyce and Buffy both stood by the couch which sat almost in the middle of the living room. Also he noticed that the windows reached from the floor to the ceiling, with heavy curtains to cover them. William smiled knowing that had probably been the reasoning for Faith to get the apartment. She had always liked big windows, so she could watch the world. The curtains though were so the world couldn't see her, that's at least how he saw it. As he continued to look around he realized how much his life had changed since his first visit here, and it all had started here. He wondered if that was why he now felt like an outsider standing in Faith's apartment. William put it behind him though, he was here to lend support to Buffy and Joyce. So he took the moving boxes he'd been carrying and set them in the living room. Across the room he saw Joyce and Buffy talking about where to start.

Although the last couple of days had been a bit confusing for Buffy, she was getting used to the fact that Joyce wasn't her biological mother. Buffy had gone and talked to Joyce the morning after William had found her on Giles’ front steps. After several hours of conversation between the two women, they had decided to take it slow. Joyce had told Buffy what she could about Buffy's biological mother, but there wasn't much Joyce knew. Although Joyce had offered to help Buffy find her mom, Buffy had decided to let things settle down first.

Buffy confided in William that she still felt hurt and betrayed because she hadn't been told earlier. She went on to note that she was putting her feelings a bit to the side for now. When he had asked why she had simply said 'Joyce has lost one daughter already she doesn't need to lose another'. William took in the scene in front of him: Joyce was laughing at something that had been said, and Buffy was giggling non stop. William waited until they had calmed down before addressing Joyce.

"Mrs. Summers, where do you want me to start?" William felt bad as he watched Joyce's expression turn from happy to the somber one that had been haunting her face these last few weeks.

"How about starting in the library. Faith didn't keep much there but photo albums and her school books." Joyce started to walk towards the bedroom then but stopped. "Oh, and William, if you see something that meant something to you, take it. I don't know what I will do with most of this, so..." She trailed off then and William gave her a nod that he understood. Joyce gave a thankful smile and turned to the fridge instead of continuing to the bedroom.

While Joyce worked on clearing out the kitchen, William walked towards the small alcove in the corner of the living room. He hadn't noticed it the time he had been at the apartment. Now as he looked at it, he knew that Faith had spent a lot of time there. There was a small bookcase in one corner and across from it lay a black beanbag chair. Above the bookcase was a peg board filled with pictures of all the gang. There was a low window right behind the beanbag chair that overlooked the sidewalk in front of the building. He could just picture Faith sitting there and making hilarious comments about the people as they walked past. William walked over and pulled the beanbag chair closer to the library, he figured he'd leave the pegboard for later. He sat down and started moving books into a box. He came across one that looked like a photo album but when he opened it, he found that it was a journal.

"Buffy!"

Buffy's voice came from somewhere across the apartment. "William, I’m a bit busy. What do ya need?"

"I found something you and your mom might not want packed up with the rest of this stuff." He heard an ‘eep’ and then something fall and crash followed by several curses. Moments later, Joyce entered the alcove, smiling. "So what was that?" William asked as he pointed towards where he thought the noise had come from.

"I'm not allowed to tell, but I'll say this; a spider and an arm full of glasses don't mix well when you are talking about Buffy."

William laughed when he imagined Buffy jumping sky high at seeing a spider and dropping the glasses. "So let me guess. There are no more glasses left, right?"

Joyce chuckled and nodded her head. "So what did you find?"

"This." William handed Joyce the book and then continued to place other books into the boxes.

William looked around for Joyce once he realized that she was still in the room but uncharacteristically quiet. She had moved over towards the window which left her back to him. He could see her reflection in the window and watched as her hand came up and wiped something from her face. Joyce closed the book and turned back to William.

"I'm going to go out for a bit. Will you and Buffy be okay here?"

"Yeah, sure."

****************************************************************************

Joyce sat down on a bench in the park located just around the block from Faith's apartment. It was a short walk so she hadn’t had to go far. She knew that if she took too long, either Buffy or William would come looking for her. Joyce leaned against the back of the bench and tried to relax. She wasn't sure what she was going to discover by reading her eldest daughter’s journal, but for some reason she felt she had to. Maybe it was to just bring peace to her own spirit that they hadn't ended on bad terms. Joyce flipped to the entry for the night of their fight, but that entry had nothing to do with what happened between them. When Joyce saw what it was about she had moved on. It was none of her business what had been going on between Faith and Xander. The next entry did pertain to the confrontation between Joyce and Faith, and it was dated a few days after it had occurred.

Well I did it again, I screwed everything up. Yep I did it this time. I don't remember much but I know I showed up on mom's doorstep. She wasn't too pleased to see me though. I know I must have said something awful because she hasn't called to check up on me yet. I can't even begin to wonder what I must have said. She's probably royally pissed right now and I don't blame her really. I know I messed it all up, I was clean and she had been proud of me. I just don't think I can keep making her proud. I'm so messed up, all I want is for this to go away and instead it keeps building. Why can't the world just disappear for a bit? I doubt if I'll ever get the answer. All I know is that I love my mom and my family but I just don't know how to face this. I don't know what to do.

The entry ended there and Joyce found herself wiping more tears from her face. She had known that life had been hard for her daughter but she hadn't realized just how much. She thought that Faith had been doing better, but her words indicated that she had actually been getting worse. Joyce thought it sounded like Faith had been ready to give up. Joyce hoped that hadn't been the case though; her daughter was strong and could fight anything. As Joyce reread the entry, she began to see another side of her daughter. A side Joyce knew Faith kept hidden from others. A side that showed Faith on a world spinning so fast that all she wanted was to get off of it. Joyce started to read on, but suddenly stopped when a specific word caught her eye.

'kill'

"Oh, dear Lord!" She quickly walked back toward the apartment. She had to show this to someone else and get their opinion.

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William stood up and stretched. His back had been in a curved position the whole time he had been going through and packing the books, and he couldn't help but feel as though his back would be stuck in that curved position for the rest of the day. Once out of the alcove, he noticed that Joyce had already left the room, so he went in search of Buffy.

William found her in the office sitting at the desk. "Whatcha doing?"

"Just going through the mail. Figured I'd leave the breakable stuff to you and mom."

"Oh yeah, heard you met a spider."

"Don't go there or I will bring up many of your past frights." Buffy gave him a look of warning.

"Tell me one time that you caught me scared of something."

"Well there was the time...no, that was Xander. Oh how about when...nope, that was Xander too. Huh. I can't remember right now, but I’ll remember something soon."

William chuckled. "Promises promises, Summers."

Buffy continued to go through the mail while William walked around the office looking at the few things that were there. A frame on the desk caught his eye. The frame held a picture of Faith, which looked to have been taken when she was about seven or eight. Buffy was also in the picture, sitting between Faith’s legs and clutching a pink pig, known as Mr. Gordo, in her arms.

"Buffy, when did you get that awful pig anyway?"

"That pig is not awful! He is a piece of my childhood, and I have had him since I was two. That picture was taken soon after I got him. Why'd you ask?"

"No real reason, just making conversation."

Buffy gave him a perturbed look. "William if you want to say something, just say it. Stop this run around. You've been doing it all day."

"I don't know what you’re talking about."

"Whenever you beat around the bush like this, it means you’re trying to ask about or say something, but you’re not sure how. That's what I’m talking about. So, are you going to talk to me or continue asking nonsensical questions?" Buffy turned in the swivel chair and gave him a look that brooked no argument.

"I talked with Xander last night, I hadn't wanted to tell you but I think you should know. The police found out that Faith had been at Riley's the day she died." William hadn't been sure how to broach the subject, but Buffy had picked up on the fact that he was holding something back. Now he watched her closely, hoping that she didn't take it too hard.

"You’re, joking...right?" She spoke through her laughter which William hadn't expected.

"No I'm not. What do you find funny 'bout this? I figured you'd be pissed or heartbroken, anything other than this."

"Oh, I'm pissed. I just find it funny that he accused me of cheating and he had actually been the one that was cheating. Very ironic isn't it?" Suddenly her face slackened with a thought and she soon was stuttering out a question. "He didn't...you know…. He wasn't the murderer, was he?"

Before William could answer, Joyce walked through the door to the office. William noticed that her face was a bit pale, and wondered why. All thought regarding Buffy's question was quickly tossed aside as he worriedly looked to Joyce. "Joyce, what's wrong?"

"I think you should read this then let me know what you think."

William took the journal and started to read.

Another one of those damn letters came today. I can't believe the nerve of this person. They keep repeating that I have taken someone from them. I have no idea who though. The latest one read like this:

Dear Bitch

You have taken him from me and you will pay. He is mine. I told him that once and I stand by that now. This is your last warning. You will not have him, I will kill you soon.

Until your blood covers my hands.

Can you believe the nerve of this person? I'm getting tired of these letters, they're just getting annoying. I have no idea who it is, though. I figure it's an ex or some jerk like that. Really though, whoever they are, they are pissing me off. I'm sick of the threats. I'd think about asking Xander for his help, but after what happened last week I figure he doesn't want to talk to me. Really though, I doubt if the letters will lead to anything. It's definitely not worth putting up with a pissed off Xander. Anyway I’m sure I can deal with whoever it is. I think it's time to go visit Willy's though and get drunk. I'll be Five by Five.

William looked up at Joyce and then back at the journal one last time before going over to the phone. He quickly dialed Xander's number.

Buffy was the first to speak. "What is going on? Mom, what was in the journal?"

William responded to Buffy’s inquiry when he noticed Joyce fumble with what to tell her. "Faith was getting death threat letters. Since none of us knew that Faith kept a journal, I doubt if Xander knows about it. In fact, I'm pretty sure he doesn't because I think he would have told me."

Suddenly the other line finally picked up. "Officer Harris here, how may I help you?"

"Hey Xan. I think you need to get over here and search Faith's apartment again. She was getting death threat letters."

"What! What do you mean death threats?"

"I mean we just found Faith's journal and there is an entry that says something about getting some sort of letter."

"So what makes you think that they were threatening to kill her."

"Oh maybe the phrase 'I will kill you' gave me a clue." William knew he was being sarcastic, but this was a new clue that would hopefully lead to finding Faith’s killer. All he wanted was for Xander to get his ass over to the apartment; but instead Xander was asking petty questions. "Listen mate, just get over here, okay?"

"Fine. I'll be there."

William hung up and turned back to Joyce and Buffy. "He'll be here soon, as long as the donuts don't lure him away." It was supposed to be funny, but it just came out flat. After everything that had been happening, it seemed like things just kept coming. He just wished that the Summers could move on, but he figured that wouldn't happen until Faith's killer was caught.

************************************************************************************************************

Xander sat at his desk. Looking through Faith’s journal, they had found close to ten entries that had said something about receiving a letter. In their search of the apartment, Xander and William had only found five letters. The earliest entry pertaining to any sort of letter was dated close to two years before. Xander couldn't believe that if it had been going on that long, Faith hadn't taken it more seriously. He thought that she was smarter than that. He wished she had taken it more seriously though, then maybe she'd be alive today.

The hardest thing to believe was that Faith had been cheating on William that long. Xander had really only thought that Faith’s infidelity had been a recent thing. He wondered how she had hidden it all this time from everyone. Had Faith been good at hiding it or had they all just not been paying attention? Xander hoped that they could find the answer though, and soon because he was tired of hearing some of the rumors going around the office about Faith. The officers assigned to the case were looking through everything again hoping to find some evidence as to who, besides William, Faith had been dating the last couple of years. Xander had already added himself to that list, but he doubted if it mattered. If all of this began at least two years prior to Faith’s death, then that meant Xander and Faith hadn't even been seeing each other at the time.

"Hey Harris! So you dated the hot stiff?"

All Xander saw was red as he looked up at his coworker, Warren Meers. Meers was as chauvinistic as a man could come, and ugly as hell. Meers had pissed Xander off many times because of the way he acted. Normally Xander could keep his anger in check, but this had been the month from hell and he was sick of holding it all in. Xander was out of the seat with his hands around Meers’ throat and pinned his body to the cubicle wall.

"Meers, I’d suggest you take your piddly little ass and get out of here before I skin you alive. Is that understood?"

"Oh, touchy about your whore, huh? I'm sorry. Thought you'd like to compare notes. See which one of us had the better payoff?"

Xander couldn't even see past the anger in him now and he let that all come out as his fist pummeled Meers’ face. Xander was only slightly aware that they had attracted an audience during their 'talk'. Xander slammed his fist into Meers’ gut and then knocked him to the floor. He looked down at the bloody mess that was Meers’ face.

"You ever talk that way about her again and you will end up with worse than a couple of punches. Understood?'

Meers nodded his head, but Xander had already started back to his desk. He was sick of sitting in this stuffy office just looking over file after file. He wasn't officially even supposed to be looking at the Summers’ file, but he had been anyway. He still felt guilty for not being able to save Faith. No matter what William had said that night in the bar, Xander couldn't dispel the guilt he felt. Xander grabbed his coat off the back of his chair and started walking towards the exit. It would be good to spend a night in with Willow. They hadn't done that in a while and Xander hoped it would take his mind off of his problems.

"Not so fast, Harris. Get your ass in my office now! We have some things to talk about." Xander thought about ignoring his boss. "NOW HARRIS!!"

It looked like Xander wouldn't be going home as early as he'd thought.

*******************************************************************************************************

In the darkness, the shadowed figure stood outside of the Summers’ house. She was pissed that after everything she had done, William still hadn't figured it out yet. William hadn't figured out that he was hers and no one else’s. She thought he had dismissed the hoity-toity little blonde back at the cemetery the day of the funeral, but no, she was back.

The shadow watched as ‘her’ guy put his arms around the blonde’s waist, and pulled her close for a kiss. Then they continued on up the walk and into the house. She had to show them. Show them all that they couldn't have him. Oh, she would teach them all not to steal what was hers. First off, the newest bitch that had sunk her claws into William needed to be dealt with.

The shadow diminished into the darkness once again and went on her way, but she'd be back and she would have what was hers.

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Buffy walked into the house and was suddenly pulled back against William. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tight to his body. William leaned down and whispered in her ear.

"Are you ok?"

Buffy leaned back into his body and left him hold some of her weight. It had been a hard day for them all. She sighed. "I think I will be. It's just a lot to take in. I mean, I thought everything was getting back to a little bit of normal and then today happens." She turned around and looked him in the eyes.
<BR"DO
She watched Williams eyes focus downwards, and he nodded his head. "Sorry, but yeah I do. I promised Wes that I would help him out. He and Fred are supposed to finally leave on their honeymoon. Fred would kill me if I caused them to put if off any longer. She's already had to wait six months because Wes's job. If she doesn’t get Wes on that plane, he will find another excuse to put it off. For some reason, that man seems to think that where he works would fall apart if he weren't there."

Buffy attempted to give off her most pouty look. "So that means no talking you into staying, huh?" She found herself pressed up against the wall as soon as the question was spoken.

"Ooh look at that lip. I'm going to get it." Get it he did, too. He grabbed it between his teeth and lightly nipped. Then he moved on to softly kiss the sting from the nips away. Then they were kissing passionately with a little petting here and there. Soon William pulled back to catch his breath.

Buffy was the first to speak. "I know you promised. I just wish sometimes you could be a little selfish." Buffy heard William chuckle, and felt it vibrate through his chest, where her head lay. Buffy felt his hands travel down her back and rest on her butt. William pulled her flush against him and gave a little wiggle. William’s actions almost distracted Buffy from what he said next, feeling how he had reacted to just the little bit of kissing and petting they'd done.

"Believe me baby, I wish I could be selfish. I'm really beginning to hate this little scenario of us putting our relationship on hold."

It was Buffy's turn to chuckle now. She looked up at William and knew what to do next. She pulled William's face closer to her own and started to place small kisses from the corner of his mouth, along his jaw, back to his ear. "You know, I think we could throw that little scenario out the window. If you want to, I mean…." She rubbed her knee up the inside of his leg and then back down. "I think I know you want me." To emphasize what she meant, she let her hand wander to the front of his pants and lightly grasped the bulge there. Buffy heard William's groan and watched as he closed his eyes and tried to get himself under control.

He finally spoke in a small growl. "You know Summers, you can be a real minx."

"Yeah I can be, you wanna see how well?" She must have hit a nerve because she was again positioned up against the wall and his hands seemed to be everywhere at once. "You know this position is getting boring. I think just about every time we've made out, it's been against this wall."

She knew the only other place had been the guest bed, but that had been when he was drunk so she wasn't counting it. He picked her up and started carrying her up the stairs. As he carried her, she continued to kiss and nip at his lips. He only took three steps before he almost stumbled, a reaction to her getting a bit overzealous with her lips around his ear.

"You keep that up and you will be making out on the stairs instead."

She chuckled but was suddenly interrupted by the phone. She thought about letting it ring, but remembered it could be her mother.

"I should probably get that. It could be mom." She watched as he acknowledged that it was a good idea and let her down. She knew it wasn't easy though because all she wanted to do was say 'fuck the phone.' She couldn't stop the chuckle that left her mouth when she realized how awful that had sounded in her head. She was actually glad she hadn't said it. Buffy must of picked the phone up not even noticing it because, she was brought out of her thoughts by the voice coming through the phone.

"Buffy? Buffy? What is so funny?"

Buffy looked back at William. He sat himself on the bottom step and was giving her a quizzical look. She decided to explain it later though. "Oh, nothing Willow. So what’s going on?"

"Oh, nothing much. Xander called and told me about today and said you could probably use a friend to talk to tonight."

"Yeah well it was a hard day but things are looking…." Buffy looked over to William and said. "up."

Buffy watched as William's eyes widened and looked at her, just daring her to go on. She turned back to the phone though and listened to Willow. It wasn't long until she had finished talking with her and had said goodbye.

"So what did she want?"

"She just wanted to know if I wanted to go shopping tomorrow."

"Oh. Now what was that about your night looking up?" William's eyebrow lifted to emphasize the word ‘up’.

"Well it was. I don't know if it is any more." William was soon kissing her again and then pulled back and gave Buffy a lust filled look. "What about now?"

Just as William started to kiss Buffy again, the front door opened and her mother walked in. "I seem to keep finding you two in that position. Except this time it's on the opposite wall."

Two bloody hells were whispered as all thoughts of the night looking 'up' dissipated into the air.

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