Chapter 11.

Spike opened the mini bar and stared blankly at the contents. Cola, lemonade, orange juice, water.

“Bloody hell, call this a bar!” he cursed.

He pulled out a can of cola and made his way back to the bed, grabbing the remote on the way. Kicking off his boots he settled himself against the pillows and began to flick through the channels. The picture flickered on the screen so he jumped up and walked back over to the television, banging it roughly on the top. This only succeeded in producing a worse picture than before, so he struck in again. The picture flickered into life for a second before disappearing completely.

He pulled on his boots, grabbed his coat and stomped through the door, slamming it closed behind him.

It had been over 5 years since he had been last in Sunnydale, and from driving around he had noticed very little had changed. There was only one place to go of an evening then, and that was The Bronze. He had driven past it earlier, knew it was still there, so he figured that was as good a place as any to drown his sorrows, so that was where he instructed the cab driver to take him.

“Buffy!” Dawn pounded on the bathroom door, “Buffy, hurry up in there, Will and Tara are gonna be here any minute!”

Buffy leant her head against the shower wall and let the boiling water pound her body. It wasn’t that she wasn’t pleased to see Willow, she had missed her like crazy since the redhead had left for New York, and she was dying to meet Tara, and hear all the news and gossip. She just wished it could have been another time, she wanted to hide in her room, pull the covers over her head and wait for things to get better again. Buffy knew Willow wouldn’t let her do that, she knew none of her friends were going to either. She reached out of the shower and grabbed a towel, pulling it tight around her, as she made her way to her bedroom.

“What to wear?” She pondered as she flicked through the items in her closet.

She turned as the door flung open and Faith threw herself onto her bed.

“The Xan man and crazy chick just called, they got Red and her honey!” Faith grinned. “Come on B! It’s party time, wear the leather pants girl!” Buffy pulled her red leather pants out and looked at them closely.

“You don’t think they are a bit, you know, slutty?” she said as she looked at Faith. Faith just giggled, “Yeah that’s the idea Buffy, tonight you are gonna be ‘foxy chick’.”

“Slutty or homely?”

Faith grabbed the jeans from Buffy’s hands and ran from the room. “ I am burning these damn jeans B! I swear I will!”

“Guess it’s the leather then”. Buffy said to an empty room.

“So let me get this straight then,” the blonde girl started, “It’s a party for Buffy, because she got a promotion, right?”

“Right.” Xander replied.

“But we can’t mention it?,” she continued with a confused look on her face.

“And again I say right!”

“See, that’s the part I don’t get Xander!”

“And that is bad….why?” the girl interrupted.

“That is bad because…it just is,” he continued, “Just trust me, it will be a ‘no fun Buffy’ if we get into that conversation, and this is supposed to be a fun night, ok.” Anya nodded. Xander pulled his car up out front of Buffy’s apartment.

“Right ladies, here we are, Casa Summers!”

They were barely through the door, before Faith had the entire group indulging in a tequila slammer marathon.

Willow watched in amusement, as Buffy knocked back shot after shot.

“So what’s the plan then Faith?” she quizzed the already quite tipsy brunette.

Faith grinned her special wicked grin. “Well Red, I thought there’s only one place to go, seeing as how we are all together for the first time in like ages, and we have some new arrivals.” she motioned to Anya and Tara, who were sitting on the sofa watching the antics of their friends in amusement. “I figured we gotta hit The Bronze, go back to our roots, and shake it up in there!”

“That and Sunnydale is so lame there’s nowhere else to go,” Dawn laughed. “I swear if I have to hear one more story of ‘it was so much better in our day’, I will scream!”

Xander looked at his watch, “Ladies, we are wasting valuable drinking time sitting here…drinking! What’s say we head on over.”

Willow pulled Xander to one side and whispered into his ear. “When did Buffy start with the drinking? She could never hold her drink when we used to go out before”.

Xander pulled his face into a frown, “She still can’t Will, I am guessing this could be a short night!”

It was almost ten by the time the group of friends had finally managed to get organised enough to actually leave the apartment, and get to the club.

“Can you guys sort out the drinks, while I go to the ladies room!” Buffy beamed before bouncing off through the crowd.

Xander handed the redhead her beer. “It must have been a hell of a shock for her Will, I mean he wasn’t exactly small heartbreak guy! He was the full blown, ultimate I am gonna rip out your heart and stamp on it guy!”

Willow took a swig from her bottle and nodded in agreement. “Exactly, which brings me back to the ‘don’t you think she’s taking it kinda well’ part!”

“Its denial!” Anya interrupted matter of factly..

They both turned to look at her.

“Its true, I saw a documentary the other day, all about people that have big shocks and pretend like they aren’t happening. Its denial I tell you.” Anya stood grinning insanely. “Deep down she’s fiercely miserable”

“Who’s fiercely miserable?” Buffy came up behind Xander.

Willow gently squeezed her lover’s hand and smiled gratefully. The last thing she wanted was Buffy thinking they were discussing her behind her back. A table had opened up, so the group rushed to get it before anyone else saw.

Willow pulled up a seat beside her best friend and took her hand.

“Ask me tomorrow Will,” she replied as she downed another shot of tequila, and screwed he face as she sucked on the lemon wedge. “Tonight I just want to pretend it’s okay, I want to pretend I am ok.” Willow silently nodded and pulled her in for a big hug.

Anya prodded her oblivious boyfriend in the side. “See, denial. I told you!” She said smiling smugly.

Chapter 12.

“Stick another one in there love.” Spike motioned to his empty glass. “In fact make it a double this time, yeah!”

The girl behind the bar took his glass and proceeded to pour two large shots of Bourbon. She slid it back across the bar to him.

“Bad day huh?” She asked as he seized the glass. He just stared back at her, before returning his gaze back to the bar.

“You just have that ‘bad day’ look about you, that’s all.” She continued. Spike picked up a beer mat and started to tear the cardboard disk apart, ignoring the jabbering woman in front of him.

“Its my first day here, I’m Kelly,” she held out her hand. He flung the pieces of card back onto the bar.

“Listen, Kelly is it? No offence pet, but if I wanted to talk I wouldn’t be sitting at the bar alone now would I?” he snapped.

She pulled her hand back and turned her back on him. “Jeez, rude much!” She muttered under her breath.

Spike ran his hand back through his hair, then turned his attention back to his drink. He didn’t want to talk, he just wanted to drink himself into a stupor. He just wanted to get that damn Summers’ woman out of his head. He had started to realise that coming back to Sunnydale was probably not the smartest plan in the world. It was clear she was never going to forgive him, he was just dredging up things that should be left where they belong, in the past. All he had wanted was a chance to explain, a chance to tell her why he left. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a packet of cigarettes, tapping the packet on the side of the bar, he retrieved one and raised it to his mouth to light it. Then he heard her. The club was busy, but he knew her laugh anywhere. Spike leant against the post by his chair and span round a little.

“Shit! Might have known she’d be here,” he mumbled banging his head on the post.

‘Is she drunk?’ He thought to himself as he sat and watched. They were all there, Willow, Xander, Faith, Dawn. ‘Oh bloody brilliant, I am gonna get lynched on my second night in town!’

Buffy was pulling Dawn up from her chair, despite Dawn’s efforts to resist. Spike looked on with amusement as she fell flat on her backside. Willow had rushed to her aid, but now Buffy was pulling her and Dawn towards the dance floor. He raised his eyebrow, this couldn’t be the same girl surely. Buffy never drank, ever!

As far as he saw it there were two options, he could make a run for the exit, but he was pretty sure Faith would get to him first, not a prospect he relished. Spike already knew she was going to make earrings out of his bollocks on Monday, as it was. Then there was option two, go talk to her, she was drunk and by the looks of it in a good mood, she had obviously calmed down since the day before. Spike stood up, downed the remainder of his drink and headed towards the table of his former friends and lover.

Buffy collapsed back into her chair. “I love tequila, it makes me happy!” she sang, very out of tune.

“More, more!” She waved an empty shot glass in front of Xander. She leant forward and her head smacked onto the table.

“Ow! Who moved the table?” She slurred.

Willow put her arm around her girlfriend, who was looking at the scene in front of her, trying not to laugh. “Oh boy, she is sure gonna have an evil hangover tomorrow!”

Tara nodded and kissed the redhead on the cheek gently. “At least she seems, you know, happy. Even if it is a distracted happy, that’s a good thing right.” She smiled.

Faith was the first to notice Spike approaching from the bar. She gave him a look that could freeze a person at a hundred paces. He stopped dead in his tracks.

“Xan, get her the hell out of here!” Faith snapped. Xander span in his chair to face her, she had a face like thunder. “Are you deaf, get her out godammit!”

Buffy had just told a joke that made no sense to anyone but her, partly because she told the wrong punch line, but mostly because she told the punch line first. She was laughing hysterically, oblivious to the silence that had descended around the table.

“Oh boy,” Willow whispered, “get ready to duck and cover Tara!”

Spike stood at the side of the table, he was shaking, and he couldn’t believe it. These people were his friends, or they used to be, yet he was terrified.

“Hi guys,” he began meekly. Buffy’s head flew up. How dare he come here?

“Buffy, Hi. Look we really need to talk, can we….can we talk, please?” He looked straight into her eyes, they cut straight through him. There was no more laughter from her, no smiles. The girl he had been watching from the other side of the club, had left the building, leaving this bitter shell behind. She simply turned back to Dawn and ignored him. Spike refused to leave it at that though, things needed to be said and if he didn’t say them now, he didn’t know if he would be able to ever

“Please Buffy, can we talk?”

She spun around to face him again and stood up, staring at him with such hate.

“You want to talk do you Spike!” She started calmly. “That’s a fucking joke!” She spat the words out with venom.

“Whatdya wanna talk about Spike?” she pushed him on the shoulder and he staggered backwards a step.

“Oh wait, I’ve got a good one,” she continued raising her voice slightly, “How about where the hell did you go? It’s been over five years, five fucking years Spike and not a word, now you come back and want to talk, well guess what I don’t want to hear it!!” He tried to get a word in but Buffy was on a roll, and there was no way he was getting in the way of it.

“I trusted you, asshole! I believed all your lies! All your lies, about how you loved me!” The words caught in her throat as she said them.

Spike stepped back towards her,” I did love you Buffy, I never lied.”

She pulled back her hand and slapped him across the face. “Liar!” she rasped “You loved me so much that after a year you just disappear, no note, no call, I thought you were fucking dead, bastard!”

He held his had to his jaw. “I had no choice Buffy, I didn’t leave because I didn’t love you. I left because I had no choice!”

“Fuck you!” She screamed. The argument had caused quite a crowd to gather nearby eavesdropping

.

“Well that’s just mighty fine Spike, so long as you had no choice, huh!”

“I lost my dad, my mom, she dead you know, not that you give a shit hey, if it’s not about Spike its not important is it!” she shouted at him.

Tears began to well in his eyes but he fought them back, “ I only just heard about your mom Buffy, I am so sorry. I cannot imagine how you felt, it must have been awful love, really awful.”

She didn’t need or want his sympathy. “What the hell would you know about it Spike, you have no idea how I felt.”

Buffy could see the anger building in him, his hands were shaking and his eyes shining with tears. “You know nothing Spike!” she spat out.

“I have lost everyone Buffy!” He shouted. “My mum, my dad, my friends, you, my…………” he couldn’t get the last words out, why would she care anyway. “You don’t have a monopoly on loss Summers!” He snapped out.

She stood square up to him, “People die Spike, deal with it, I have. I’m glad you lost people you love, what goes around usually comes around!” Buffy span on her heel and headed to the bar, empty glass in hand.

Spike steamed off in the direction of the exit, leather coat billowing behind him.

“Ouch!” Anya spoke up,“She fights dirty after a few drinks huh!”

Chapter 13.

Spike stormed out of the fire exit at the back of the club, cursing under his breath, fighting back the tears.

It had been so long, so much had happened. There was just too much emotion between them, that was clear now. Nothing would be the same again.

“Fucking bitch!” He slammed his fist into the corrugated iron fence, pulling it back as he felt the pain course down his arm.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” He kicked the dumpster, before picking up a crate of empty glass bottles and slamming them into the floor. Glass shattered all around.

Xander appeared at the exit and ran towards the distraught blonde man in front of him.

“Spike man, relax!” he said as he approached.

Spike simply turned and looked at his old friend with contempt. “Sod off Xander, unless you want me to start punching your face instead of this fence.”

“She didn’t mean that shit about your parents, she wouldn’t say something like that and mean it.” He began to speak softly. “I mean what did you expect dude? She was hardly going to welcome you with open arms, you broke her heart.”

Spike sat down on the curb and put his head into his hands.

The blonde man couldn’t speak, even if he could he didn’t know what words he could possibly say. Xander seemed to understand this. Spike and Xander had quickly become close friends in the year he was dating Buffy. The group were pretty much inseparable, they had no secrets from each other, and they always thought they would be friends forever.

Xander sat down beside Spike on the curb, putting a hand on his shoulder in a supportive gesture.

“You didn’t just leave her, you left us all!” he continued with a subtle hint of bitterness in his voice. “We were friends, we were supposed to be moving into that apartment share, you left me in the shit with that. Then there was Dawn, she adored you man, and you just disappeared!” Spike nodded. “Its not just Buffy that’s going to have a hard time forgiving, you screwed us all over, for what?”

Spike shoulders began to shake as the tears flowed down his cheeks. He couldn’t hold it in, couldn’t pretend to be the tough guy.

“Why Spike? And ‘I had no choice’ will cut no ice with me either!”

Spike sat up and pulled out his wallet, throwing it into Xander's lap. “I really didn’t Xander,” he began. “Go on, open it up.”

Xander picked up the wallet and undid the brass stud holding it closed. Inside was a selection of credit cards, business cards and cash. He looked at the Englishman confused.

“In the pocket you bloody idiot!” Spike snapped.

Xander opened the little pouch in the side of the leather wallet, a handful of small photos fell into his lap. He began to flick through the slowly. There was a picture of Spike and Buffy at prom, one of them all in Spikes car, one of the whole gang sat around a table at The Bronze. Xander continued to look through he photos till he came to the most recent picture. He held it in front of him, trying to make sense of what he saw.

“That’s why you had to leave?” He asked quietly. “You really had no choice did you.”?

The two men sat in silently on the curb staring into the night.

To be continued…….

Many thanks again to my soooooper beta Mercy, you are a star!!!!

Pleeeeze review, pretty please ;o)

Chapter 14.

"Do you want me to get that?" Willow shouted through to Faith in the kitchen.

She didn't answer, she was dancing around the kitchen with her headphones on, making pancakes for Willow, Tara and Dawn.

Willow decided to get the door, before the person on the other side banged a hole in it.

"Oh hey Xander, Anya, come on in. Faith's in the kitchen cooking up some breakfast, you want some?"

Xander shook his head and made his way to the sofa. He took a quick look around the living room.

"The Buffster not alive yet I take it?" he questioned.

Dawn shook her head. He wasn't surprised, she was in a hell of a state when he and Anya had dropped her off the previous night. It had taken five minutes to get her up the stairs, as she insisted on sitting down every other step for a rest. In the end Xander had put her over his shoulder, and carried her the rest of the way fireman style. She was asleep before they even reached the front door.

Faith returned from the kitchen, with a plate of pancakes in one hand, and syrup in the other.

"Tuck in guys, this is a Faith special!" she grinned.

"What's so special about them?" Anya quizzed. They looked like ordinary pancakes to her.

"It's special because I cooked them, that what's special babe!" Dawn giggled on the sofa, it was true, Faith wasn't generally found anywhere near the vicinity of the cooker.

Xander decided he would be the first to broach the subject. "So anyone have a chance to speak to her about last night? I mean she was kind of out of it!"

Before anyone had a chance to answer, a very ill looking Buffy staggered into the room.

"It's alive!" Faith shrieked, "At least it's moving, that must mean its alive, right!" she joked.

"Ow ow ow, volume down a touch please!" Buffy whined, holding her head and screwing up her eyes.

Willow scooted up on the sofa to make a space for the weary blonde.

"How you feeling Buffy?" she asked.

Buffy leant back into the sofa, pulling her knees up to her chest.

"Just fabulous," she whispered. "Assuming I don't move, think or, ow, speak." She rested her head on her knees.

"And I think I broke my ass? Did I break my ass last night?"

The redhead couldn't help but giggle. "Well you kinda fell over once or twice...and some. Possibly more?"

Buffy groaned.

"But it was a kinda subtle falling over, I don't think anyone noticed, honest!" Willow was a terrible liar, Buffy groaned again trying to remember.

Faith scooped a couple of pancakes onto a plate and waved them under Buffy's nose. "Want some Breakfast Buff?" She didn't get the sentence out before Buffy was running towards the bathroom, a very ill shade of green. Faith turned up the stereo to drown out the heaving sounds, coming from the bathroom.

"Shouldn't someone check on her?" Anya asked.

Dawn jumped up and ran to the bathroom, to look after her nauseated sister.

Xander turned his attention back to Faith.

"So Faith. How do you think it's gonna go tomorrow?" he quizzed.

"How do you mean?" She replied with a mouth full of pancake.

Xander knew he was going to have to tread carefully here. "Well I mean the whole Buffy, you and Spike sharing the same oxygen thing? You guys are back at work tomorrow right?" He stated diplomatically.

Faith nodded, swallowing her mouth full. "The way I see it he won't be breathing for long, not when I am through with him!" she stated firmly.

Xander cringed inwardly, this is exactly the response he would have expected from Faith. She didn't mess about, if you hurt one of hers, then you get the full wrath of a 'pissed off' Faith.

"Lack of oxygen will be the least of his worries, by the time I am done with that bastard!" She added, just in case anyone was in any doubt.

Xander leant forward slightly in his chair. "The thing is Faith, we don't know what really happened. I mean he....he may have had his reasons, you know?" he stuttered.

Faith crossed the room and knelt in front of the nervous man. "If your holding back Xander, and I find out. Spike won't be the only guy around here with an oxygen problem!" She spoke quietly and calmly, but there was a hint of menace in her voice. "What's the story?" She continued.

"There's no story, he didn't tell me anything about why he left." He replied. It wasn't as if he was 'lying' he thought to himself, Spike hadn't actually said a word.

"Cool!" she said as she jumped up. "In that case I am going to the store, we are out of beer."

Xander flopped back into his seat and let out a groan. Pissing Faith off wasn't a good plan, ever! He knew someone had to tell Buffy, but he really thought that person should be Spike, or anyone else for that matter, anyone but him. Buffy was one of his best friends, he really didn't want to be the messenger on this one.

Buffy re-emerged from the bathroom and slumped back onto the sofa. She didn't look too good, in fact it looked like she had a cat on her head, and last nights make up was still smeared down her face, but to be honest she didn't give a shit. She just wanted to curl up on the sofa with her friends, watch old movies and snuggle. That was her plan for the day.

"Feeling better?" Willow gave her friend a hug.

"A little, just keep those pancakes away from me!" She managed a faint smile.

The group settled around the television. Dawn and Xander fought over what film to put on. The conversation was kept well away from the previous nights events. Willow and Tara were trying to repack their suitcase for the fourth time. Willow had decided seeing as they were in California for the whole Christmas break, she should probably show Tara a bit more than just Sunnydale, so they were heading off in the morning for a week travelling around. The redhead felt a little bad, leaving her friend in the midst of a personal disaster, but she knew Buffy too well. When things went wrong she preferred to deal alone, rather than be surrounded by people who were trying to say the right thing, and failing miserably. Willow knew there was no right thing to say here, so she and Tara were off to LA in the morning.

The peace was shattered by Faith crashing through the door laden with bags.

"Some help would be nice here Xanman!!!" she shouted from the doorway.

The afternoon passed quietly and uneventfully and it was nearly five o'clock before Anya couldn't keep quiet anymore. She waited for Buffy to go to the kitchen before speaking up.

"So what's the deal here? Are we all gonna pretend like she didn't say that stuff last night, because frankly I don't think that's healthy!"

Xander shot her a look that would kill at 50 paces, it was too late.

"Stuff, what stuff?" Buffy questioned.

Willow jumped in to diffuse the situation. "It was nothing Buffy, you were a little drunk, I am sure he won't even remember."

"I said what stuff? What did I say?" Silence fell around the room until Anya spoke up.

" You said you were glad his parents were dead, glad he had the pain too. Or something like that, don't quote me." Xander kicked her hard on the shin. "Ow, What? She needs to know! She has to work with the guy tomorrow!" She stated the matter of the facts.

Buffy slid down the wall where she was standing and put her head in her hands.

"B! Don't sweat it, he totally deserved it!" Faith spoke firmly. "I am gonna kick his ass tomorrow, bastard!"

"No!" Buffy whispered.

Faith stood back surprised and observed the fragile woman sat in front of her.

"What do you mean no? He so totally deserves it!"

Buffy raised her head to face the furious girl.

"I said no Faith! He didn't deserve that!! Anya's right, we all have to work together, there's no way round it and god knows I have tried to find a way with Wesley" she sighed loudly.

"It's all in the past, all of it. If I can't deal with it, then where does that leave me! Before he came back I had all but moved on, so that's what I am going to do, move on!"

Faith stared at the blonde in disbelief. "So you are just going to let him get away with it! Are you crazy?"

Buffy knew she meant well, she was just looking out for her and she was grateful, even if she wasn't showing it.

"Yes Faith, tomorrow I am going to apologise and we are going to make a new start, and that means you too!! I need you onboard Faith."

The brunette shrugged her shoulders and nodded, "If thats how you want to handle it B, it's your call."

Spike sat at the desk in his hotel room, scribbling wildly on the notebook in front of him. His hand was bandaged from the previous night's argument with a corrugated iron fence and it was awkward for him to hold the pen, but it was easier than trying to type on his keyboard. He had given up trying that hours ago.

Xander had told him she hadn't meant those cruel words she had said to him, but Spike wasn't so sure. They were spoken with such venom, they cut straight through him. 'No she meant it alright,' he thought. 'Bloody bitch meant every word!!' he flung the notebook down and walked to the window.

"If she war she's bloody well got it!"

Chapter 15.

Buffy and Faith finally strolled into work at 9.45am. It had taken a lot longer than they had imagined to get Willow and Tara organised and out of the apartment, leaving Buffy having to work on her ‘apology’ speech. As they walked into the reception area it was deserted, and the telephone was ringing.

“Where the hell’s Harmony?” Faith wondered.

Buffy wandered over to the desk and picked up the ringing phone.

“WP Publishing, Elizabeth Summers speaking, how may I direct your call?” She spoke politely.

“Save it Summers!” Came the voice on the other end. “You and Faith get your pretty little asses in my office now!” He hung up.

Buffy screwed her face into a frown and stared at the receiver before placing it back.

They pushed open the door to the office and as they did so Spike spun around in his chair to face them. Buffy stifled a giggle and tried not to look at Faith, who was doing the same. ‘Who does he think he is? Dr Evil or something?’ she thought. It was true, he did look rather comical, and in fact all that was missing was a white fluffy cat on his lap.

“Nice of you two ladies to decide to join us today!” He started, looking at each of them in turn. The girls quickly realised that he wasn’t putting this on, he was seriously mad. “Wes may have been all liberal with the time keeping, but whilst he’s left me in charge I expect you to be here on time, every day, no excuses!” He slammed the pen he had been waving around down hard onto the desk, making Buffy jump.

She approached the desk. “See there was this thing this morning, with Willow and Tara, and then another Dawn thing and…”

“No excuses Summers! I thought I just made that pretty clear.”

“We’re really sorry sir,” Faith said in possibly the least genuine tone of voice she could find Buffy shot her a glare. ‘Oh nice one Faith, that’s so not going to help,’ she thought.

Buffy decided in this case, the best form of defence was a counter attack. “I hope you are going to roast Harmony’s ass when she gets in Spike! I mean it’s a pretty poor show having an unmanned reception.” She smiled smugly.

“My thoughts exactly!” He replied as he stood up from his desk and walked to the filing cabinet, picking up a huge pile of paperwork. “However it wouldn’t have been unmanned if you had been here on time. I have sent Harmony out with Tracy for the day.”

Buffy raised her eyebrows and moved to sit on the edge of the desk. “You sent our only receptionist out for the day?” She said in an accusing tone. “And you think my management skills are rusty!” She snorted.

Spike crossed the room to Faith, enormous pile of paperwork in hand. He dropped it in her lap and smirked. “This should keep you going for the day pet!” Faith looked at the paperwork, then back to her boss confused.

“It’s filing, you file it! Bleedin hell woman what do you actually do here? Go file!”

Faith couldn’t even speak, all she could think of was the lecture Buffy had been giving her the last 24hrs. ‘Be nice, be polite, and under no circumstances punch him!’

“Fantastic!” she groaned, and made her way back to her desk.

“I don’t believe you, Faith does not file!” Buffy snapped at the man before her. “She is a trained negotiator, she has a team below her, and she tells them to file asshole!” She stood up and stomped towards the door.

“Summers! Where the hell do you think you are going?” He shouted as the tiny fuming blonde reached the door.

She spun around trying to hide the anger in her face, but failed miserably. “I don’t have time for power games today Spike! I have a meeting with James Devere in 20mins about his sequel. Some of us actually have jobs to do you know.”

He beat her to the door and pushed it closed. Leaning in close he whispered, “Actually I sent Harm and Tracy to do your wining and dining. Tracy is, as far as I can see very competent, and James has a thing for Harmony. I thought we would get a better deal with a change of tactics.”

“I need you covering on reception today.” He continued trying hard to contain his enjoyment of the situation.

‘I will not punch him, I will not punch him’ Buffy repeated the phrase over and over again in her head.

“I’ll get an agency receptionist to cover, it’s no big.” She recovered, flashing him a winning smile as she reached for the door handle.

He leant forward and grabbed her by the wrist.

“No actually you won’t pet. You see, I think it’s a valuable exercise for higher members of staff to reacquaint themselves, with the basics that make a company work. No one else on the team is causing a problem.”

Buffy could do nothing but stare at him, horrified.

He let go of her wrist and as she left the office, he called after her.

“Oh Buffy, make us a pot of coffee there’s a sweetheart.” He shut the door and returned to his chair, trying to keep the sound of his laughter down.

Buffy stamped across the office towards reception, steam coming out of her ears. She stopped by Faith who was sitting on the floor by the filing cabinets surrounded by paper.

“This is all muddled up, the bastard probably did it on purpose!” She complained. “I am just gonna file it all under E and go for coffee, you up for that B!” She grinned.

“E?” Buffy questioned raising her eyebrows.

“Yeah E for ‘Eat shit asshole!’ ” She stood up sending papers flying everywhere, “Caffeine fix now!!”

Buffy sighed and leant back against one of the cabinets. “I’d love to, but ‘Mr I know everything’ in his infinite wisdom, has decided I am to be ‘reception girl’ for the day.”

Faith looked at her friend mouth agape. “Oh please let me hurt him Buff!”

“Hold that thought Faith, I gotta go make his Lordship coffee!” With that she headed towards the kitchen, Faith following on her heels.

“Can I at least spit in it?”

The two friends put a brave face on the situation for the rest of the morning. Buffy delivered Spike his coffee, resisting the temptation to throw it over him, and Faith ploughed through her filing. Finally it was time for lunch. As soon as the hands hit twelve on the office clock they were out the door, and down the street.

“Aaaargh!” Buffy screamed in frustration. “I am so gonna kick his arrogant, conceited, pig headed ass I swear! I mean, reception, fucking reception! Who does he think he is? Sitting in my god damn chair, in my god damn office, dishing out orders like he’s the…the boss or something! Asshole!”

Faith held open the coffee shop door for the blonde, not daring to interrupt her mid flow.

“You know what he said to me before lunch? He said it was character building! Fucking character building! Build this Spikey!” Buffy made an obscene gesture out of the window towards the office block.

Faith couldn’t help but fall about laughing. It had been a long time since she had seen Buffy this wound up about anything.

“Well you know B, you just jump in there whenever you feel like giving him your big apology speech won’t you!” She mocked.

Buffy rolled her eyes sat in a chair by the window.

“Humph!” She snorted. “Apologise to that… that bastard! I think not. I must have been mad,” she fumed.

Faith took a bite from her pastry, dropping crumbs all down her front.

“Changing the subject slightly Buff, what’s he been doing in that office all morning?” Faith asked.

Buffy took a big sip of her latte.

“I have no idea,” she replied. “He has been getting calls from some guy called Gunn, whoever that is? He is being all shifty about it, so I guess he is one more cog in the ‘piss off Buffy’ machine.” She shrugged her shoulders. “To be honest I don’t care. I just want today to be over!!” She put her head into her hands and sighed deeply.

“I really thought I could do this Faith,” she whispered, “but it keeps getting harder. I just don’t know if I can make it through the day. Why is he making this so hard?” She sat up and wiped a tear from eye.

Across the road Spike was snacking on a sandwich from the deli. He was really getting under her skin, he knew that. He had thought that it would make him feel a little better, a little happier to cause her some distress, to get her back for her hurtful comments, but Gunn’d had no news. He was now back somewhere between despair and torment.

The day didn’t get much better from then on.

Buffy thought Faith was going to knock Spike out, when he deposited another unfeasible amount of filing on her desk. She had been busy sharpening some pencils at the time.

“B, If I stab him through the heart with this pencil do you think we can pass it off a some freak office accident?” She asked, touching the sharpened point with the tip of her finger.

“Yeah I can just see the headline Faith. ‘Man trips over paperclip and impales himself on sharpened pencil’ shocker! You never know, we may just get away with it! ” She smiled evilly.

“William Giles office. Can I help you?” She answered shooting a sickly sweet smile in Spike direction.

“William, It’s Mr Gunn…….again! He say’s he won’t hold.” Buffy waved the phone in his direction.

He grabbed the phone out of her hand without so much as a thank you. “Charles, what have you got? Tell me its good news!”

Buffy stood rearranging the flowers in the vase on the table. Spike put his hand over the receiver. “This is a private conversation! Get out!” He snapped, motioning for her to leave the room.

She didn’t even bother to reply. She turned and ran out, not even stopping to pick up her coat as she left the building.

Chapter 16.

Buffy walked all the way home, wanting to get some of the stress out of her system, before she had to face people. It took her 45mins, so even though she had left the office early, Faith had beaten her home after taking her usual cab.

She came in slamming the door behind her, and threw her keys on the table.

“What happened to you B?” Faith asked concerned.

She grabbed a beer from the refrigerator and twisted off the cap. Faith raised an eyebrow. Buffy rarely drank, and never on a work night. She figured Spike must have pissed her off pretty bad, to have her heading straight for the beer.

“Just wanted to clear my head, that’s all Faith,” she mumbled before settling onto the sofa.

“Well at least its all back to normal tomorrow huh!” The brunette joined her on the sofa. “I mean he got his little ‘power trip’ thing out of his system now, right!” She continued. “You wanna tell me what’s on your mind Buff?”

“Buffy? What the hell did he do now?” she asked.

The blonde beside her just sobbed uncontrollably.

“You wouldn’t understand Faith. You never could!” Buffy whimpered.

Faith took the bottle from Buffy’s hand and took a swig. She handed it back to her, but Buffy shook her head.

“Look Buff, I had a shit day too you know. I have been filing goddamn papers all freaking day! He didn’t just pick on you!” She snapped. “I am not going to let it mess up my whole day though, you just got to get over it! It’s only work.”

Buffy sat forward, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “You think this is about today?” She snorted. “You think I give a shit about his little mind games today! You have no idea!” She snapped back. “You will never understand what this is like for me Faith!”

This conversation was frustrating Faith. She had taking crap all day from Spike, but she just let it wash over her like water off a ducks back. She wasn’t going to stew about it all evening too.

“Well maybe I might understand, if you explain it to me B!” she said running out of patience.

As soon as she had said the words, Buffy wished she could take them back. She had never seen Faith look like that ever. The colour drained from her face, and a look of pure anger spread across her features.

“Faith, Faith I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” She shouted after her friend, but it was too late. Faith had grabbed her purse and was already out the door.

Dawn poked her head around the living room door.

“That was a low blow Buffy!” She said shaking her head, before following Faith out the door.

Faith strode down the road at a fierce pace, she didn’t know where she was going, and she just couldn’t be around Buffy right now. She knew it was true, she didn’t let people close to her, she thought out of all the people in the world Buffy would understand why.

Her mother had raised her single handed until she was 2 years old, but then Faith was taken into care after her mother overdosed. 2 years later she was finally declared clean and fit to take her daughter back, but she had decided that she couldn’t handle the responsibility of a young child. Faith had never seen her mother again, not that she wanted too. She had nothing but contempt for the woman that had abandoned her.

Faith had always been wild, people politely called her a party girl, but in less kind circles she was described less flatteringly. She trusted no one but herself when it came to her heart. Buffy was right, she didn’t know how to love. The only person she had ever loved was her mother, and she had abandoned her. Now she always kept people at arms length, that way they could never hurt her or never leave her. She used them to fill the empty space inside her, and then threw them away when she had taken what she wanted.

Faith blinked back the tears that were welling in her eyes. She didn’t cry. She was strong. She was tough. She was Faith.

She couldn’t believe how much the words of her friend had wounded her. There was a big hole forming inside of her. A big empty hole.

‘Only one way to fix this!’ She thought as she pushed open the door to Willy’s bar. ‘Get drunk and get laid!’

She slammed a handful of dollars onto the wooden bar.

“Line em up Willy! I am partying tonight” She masked her hurt under her familiar ‘party face’ and knocked back a shot of bourbon.

Buffy sat on the couch staring into space. ‘Why am I doing this? Why am I pushing away everyone close to me??’

She let the tears come again, but didn’t bother to wipe them away this time, she let them run down her face and drip onto her knees, which she had pulled up close to her chest. What she had said to Faith was out of line, she knew that. The words were actually true, but she knew why Faith was the way she was. Life had dealt her a rough hand, and she just did what she did to be happy once in a while.