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Chapter 28
Celebration (part 1)

The door opened slowly, revealing Giles, and a few steps behind him, Spike. Buffy twisted her hands nervously in front of her, suddenly feeling shy. Now that a third person was involved in this, it felt like the whole thing was more real and it made her nervous. Like her secret relationship was now public, even if the public consisted of only one person. Well, not just nervous. Nervous, excited and happy. It felt more official. Now, everything depended on Spike’s reaction. She already knew how he felt about her risking her job for him. The fact that he never answered her emails made her worried that maybe he decided to end it with her. That was something she wasn’t willing to face but the risk of this happening was very real and she was conscious of it. Hence the nervousness that had gripped her by the throat and wouldn’t let go.

She watched from beneath her lashes as Giles unlocked Spike’s handcuffs. The way he shifted his weight restlessly from one foot to the other betrayed the fact that the man she loved was just as uncertain as she was about what was happening. He shot Giles a surprised look when the guard reached for the restraints, clearly not expecting Giles to trust him enough to do such a thing

“Don’t thank me. You’re obviously too bloody clumsy to be trusted with those around your wrists. God only knows where you’ll get them caught this time if I leave them on.” The older man grumbled good-naturedly.

He turned briefly toward Buffy. “I’ll be back soon after midnight. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure no one interrupts. But to be safe, lock the door.”

Buffy nodded numbly, her eyes never leaving Spike. She was desperately trying to figure out what was going on behind those crystal blue eyes of his, but couldn’t decrypt the swirl of emotions she could see in them.

Over the past couple of days, she had missed him more than she thought possible. And during the hours since Giles had called, her wild imagination hadn’t stop creating all kinds of scenarios of romantic reunions. But none involved them standing frozen, a few feet apart, in awkward silence. No. Most of her reunion scenes had them running in slow motion toward each other with a sappy love song playing in the background, their arms wrapping tightly around the other, their lips connecting in a passionate kiss and declarations of love being exchanged. Instead, Spike was silently looking down at his now bare wrists and she couldn’t find a thing to say to break the thick ice forming between them.

Giles opened the door to make his way out. Door knob in hand, he turned momentarily to look at the two young lovers. He frowned at the awkward scene and wanted to dryly comment on the fact that they didn’t have the entire night in front of them, but decided against it and discretely exited the office.

Both their eyes glanced briefly toward the door as it closed, but the relief the distraction brought was short lived when they realized they were now alone. Someone had to say something or do something. In his mind, Spike was telling Buffy everything he needed her to know. How much he loved her, how worried he’d been, how he missed her… But for some reason, none of the words crossed his lips. He wanted nothing more than to run to her and pull her into his arms, but couldn’t move. He decided instead to wait for her to talk first, but she was obviously waiting for the same thing. So neither of them said a thing.

Still unable to bring herself to speak, Buffy busied herself by smoothing down nonexistent wrinkles on her red dress. This prompted Spike to finally open his mouth.

“You look fantastic.” He said, his voice booming in the silence of the room despite the fact that he had merely whispered the words.

Buffy blushed and chuckled, the sound almost alien to her ears. She couldn’t recognize her own voice when she answered. “This old thing? What can I say… I wanted to look my Sunday best.”

There was a pause, but they both decided to not let it drag in case the nervous silence would start again and neither of them would find the strength to end it this time.

“Buffy” “Spike”

They spoke at the same time, and stopped, both smiling at how silly they were being.

“Why don’t you go first, pet?” He said quietly.

She took a deep breath and finally looked him in the eyes. “I brought a bunch of stuff.”

She tilted her head toward the coffee table to illustrate what she meant. Spike looked and saw a bottle of champagne and some food on the table.

“… had a whole fun couple of hours planned. But… maybe we should talk first before I make a fool of myself by assuming we‘re good. I’m not sure what’s going on since you haven’t talked to me or answered my emails in a week, so if you’re trying to tell me something--if you want to break up with me…”

“W--what?! Brea… Bloody Hell! Why would I want to break up with you?!” His eyes were wide with shock and he was slowly shaking his head, clearly not understanding how she could come up with such a ridiculous idea.

Buffy hated to sound so insecure, but she couldn’t help it. She really had been worried about his silence, and the weirdness between them since he’d walked into the office had only reaffirmed her fears. She crossed her arms defensively over her chest. “I haven’t heard from you, you haven’t called, you haven’t even answered my emails. Can’t blame a girl for jumping to conclusions.”

Spike’s expression went from shocked to somewhat angry. “I didn’t try to contact you because I didn’t want to put you in anymore trouble than you already were! How could you think that I didn’t want to see you anymore? After all the bloody mess we’ve been through? I told you I love you. That’s not something I say lightly, Buffy.”

He ran his fingers through his hair in agitation, messing up the neatly slicked back bleached locks. When he looked back up and saw the unshed tears in her hazel eyes, he instantly calmed down.

“I’m sorry, pet, but I’ve been worried sick and trying to do the right soddin’ thing by staying away from you and turns out it only added to your pain. I’m a right wanker. I don’t mean to be, you know. It’s just that I don’t always think things through.”

“It’s OK. I don’t exactly have the reputation for being a thinker myself. But, I didn’t hear from you after we got caught, I thought that either you were mad at me for being such a bitch last time, or you decided that it wasn’t worth the risk to be together. I thought you had decided to make the decision for me.”

“Luv… I’m not gonna lie to you. A part of me does think that it’d be best for you to stop seeing me. But, you know how they say that love is selfless. Well, that’s rubbish. I’m selfish and the idea of parting from you is too painful to even consider. I can’t lose you and I’ll be with you for as long as you let me.”

Before he knew what was happening, he had an armful of Buffy. Her lips found his and she poured all of her pent up emotions into the kiss. He could feel the relief, love, and the fear that wasn’t completely extinguished yet, in the way her tongue explored his mouth and her soft lips crushed his. She pulled away from him, tears streaming down her beautiful face.

“I’m sorry I’m such an idiot, but I was so scared I was going to lose you.”

“Never.”

He lifted her off the floor and she eagerly wrapped her legs around his lean hips to support herself while he walked her to the desk. Spike carefully put her down on it, keeping his arms wrapped tightly around her and his lips never leaving the velvety skin of her face. He kissed every inch of it, her forehead, her eyelids, the tip of her nose, her round cheeks, finishing with her mouth. But he was not nearly done, he was just started. His hands undid the strap that held her halter dress together, and the red silk fell around her waist, forgotten as soon as the satiny curves of her perky breasts were exposed to his starving eyes. He caressed the black satin of the low cut, strapless bra covering her breasts with the palm of his hand.

“That’s really sexy, luv. Too bad it’s gonna have to come off.” He whispered before unclasping the garment and throwing it over his shoulder with a satisfied smirk.

He couldn’t believe just how stunning she looked wearing almost nothing but the necklace he gave her, the rubies and diamonds shimmering against her golden skin. How she could have thought he’d be able to live without her was beyond him. He’d never let go of this goddess unless he was forced to, that’s for bloody damn sure. And even then, they’d have to drag him away kicking and screaming.

Buffy spread her legs wider to welcome him in the cradle of her warm thighs. She felt at home in his arms. For the first time in days, she felt like the burden of her worries had been lifted from her shoulders. She felt light headed and almost giddy with euphoria. Her man was back where he belonged and she wasn’t about to let him go. She’d meant it when she’d told Giles that she wouldn’t stop seeing Spike no matter what. And looking at him now, she knew he was worth the trouble. And not just because of how incredibly gorgeous he was and how she could lose herself in the ocean blue of his eyes; but because of the way he loved her. She could see it on his face, feel it in each and every one of his tender kisses. His heart was beautiful and it was all for her. She’d take care of it as if it was the most precious thing in the world, no matter the risks.

She watched the top of his blond head as he suckled on her puckered nipple and reclined back on her elbows to give him better access. She loved this. Not only because it sent tingles throughout her body and warmed her lower belly in anticipation, but also because of how erotic the sight was. He was sucking on her breast as if his life depended on it or it could give him the answers to the mysteries of life. His hands were roaming mindlessly over her flesh, trying to touch every inch of her at once. It made her arousal escalate to the point of near madness.

She pulled him back up so she could unbutton his shirt, needing the feel of his warm skin and hard muscles under her palms. Once she accomplished her task, Buffy put her arms around his neck to help lift herself off the desk. He pulled both the dress and her thong off of her and dropped them on the floor.

They met in a frantic tangle of limbs, his raging hard-on pressing intimately against her over sensitive sex. She whimpered in need and made it obvious she wasn’t all that interesting in dragging things on when she reached down to guide his rock hard shaft to her opening.

“Now, Spike. Please. William, I love you.”

“I love you too, Buffy. So much.”

He grunted in overwhelming pleasure when he was finally sheathed inside her, relishing the feel of her tight hot flesh surrounding him. This felt like heaven to both of them after missing each other so much. Especially now that his hands were free to do as they pleased. He held her face between his hands and kissed her softly on the lips before starting to move in a torturously slow rhythm within her.

The only thing that could be heard in the office were Buffy’s soft sighs and moans, and Spike’s grunts and whisper of passionate words. He braced himself on the desk with one hand on each side of her, and quickened his pace, bringing her to the edge, then slowing down again.

Buffy’s thoughts were all over the place, and full of contradiction. One second, she was begging for her release; the next, asking him to never stop. Spike’s cock filling her was the most amazing sensation she had ever experienced and she wrapped her legs firmly around his waist, trying to hold him to her, not willing to let him escape her warmth. But no matter how hard she tried, he kept pulling out, thankfully only to push back in a second later. That moment in between each thrust was torture to her. She hated the feeling of him leaving her and how empty she was when he wasn’t buried snuggly inside her pussy.

But no matter how much they wanted this to last forever, their bodies refused to listen, the pleasure too great for them to hold back the moment of their climax much longer.

The numbness spreading in Buffy’s limbs made it impossible for her to hold herself up any long so she lay down on the desk. Spike followed her, resting his chest against hers, loving the feel of her round breasts pressed against him. He hid his face in the crook of her neck and closed his eyes, inhaling the smell of her. She could feel how tensed his body was and knew what he needed.

“Let it go, baby. Don’t hold back.” Her hand reached up to caress his hair lovingly. “Come for me.”

She grabbed his firm ass cheeks in encouragement and that’s all he needed. Spike let go of his control and started thrusting hard and fast into her, his ass clenching with the effort. Buffy lifted her hips off the desk to meet his every thrust. She raised her arms above her head, not caring that she knocked a few papers and pens off the desk. With every deep push of his engorged shaft into her, Spike’s pelvis rubbed against her over sensitive clit and that was all she needed. Buffy bit on her hand to muffle the shout of his name as she came harder than she ever did before. The clenching of her inner walls around his cock pushed Spike over the edge. They kept their eyes open and locked with each others as they rode wave after wave of the intense pleasure.

Spent, Spike lay down on top of her, careful not to crush her under his weight, and captured her lips in a tender kiss.

“You’re bloody amazing, Buffy. Did I ever tell you what an amazing woman you are? Doesn’t matter if I did though, I think it needs to be said again and again.”

She smiled lazily and stretched like a contented kitten beneath him. “You’re the one who makes me amazing. Without you, I was nothing but a shell.” She reached out and caressed his cheek. “You’re perfect, you know that?”

He chuckled. “No I’m not.”

“Yes you are. You’re perfect for me. And I love you.”

(end of part 1)

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Chapter 28
Celebration (part 2)

Spike’s happy mood dropped a notch when he noticed Buffy putting her dress back on. He frowned and pouted like a petulant child.

“What the bleedin’ hell do you think you’re doing there, missy?”

“Putting my dress back on.” She stated the obvious, playing innocent.

“I noticed that. But I thought this was going to be a… naked party of some sort.”

“First, YOU put you clothes back on, so I don‘t see why I should be the only one naked at your naked party.” Buffy said in a scolding tone while stalking to where he was sitting on the couch. “Second, I bought this damn dress for you, so I’m gonna wear it, and you’re gonna love it. Got it?”

“Yes ma’am.” Spike grinned at her when she came to sit on his lap, the bottle of champagne in her hand. He took the bottle from her and looked at the label. Perrier Jouet. “Fancy stuff. Especially for a man who’s tasted nothing but artificially flavored juice, instant coffee and water for the past eight months or so. Shouldn’t we keep this for midnight though?”

“Maybe…” Buffy coughed loudly and Spike frowned in concern. “But we risk being interrupted by Giles if we wait too long. It would be a shame to waste it.”

Spike ignored what she said, still concerned about her coughing fit. “You sick, pet?”

She pouted. “Yeah. But don’t worry; I saw the doctor and she gave me some antibiotics. I will be right as rain before you know it. Until then, you can gargle with the champagne, the alcohol will kill the bacteria. Wouldn’t want you to get sick too now would we?” She joked lightly.

“It was a rough couple of days.” She added softly. “I was upset and didn’t get much sleep. That’s probably why I got sick in the first place. But I’ll be fine now.”

He smiled at her, deciding to drop the subject. Their time together was always numbered and he didn’t want to waste it by going back on what happened. Seeing Buffy just looking at the bottle in her hands, he finally rolled his eyes and took it from her.

“Give me that. I can’t believe you’re scared of the big bad bottle of champagne.”

“Hey! I’m not scared of it. It’s just--things like that can turn into mighty dangerous weapons in my hands. I’d probably send the cork flying all over the room, it would bounce off a wall and come back to hit me in the eye. I love my eyes and don’t want anything to happen to them, that’s all.”

“Love your eyes too, kitten.” He kissed her on the nose and she blushed prettily.

In one swift motion, he had the bottle opened with a soft ‘pop’ and without spilling any of the precious bubbles. He poured the expensive treat into the two plastic glasses she had brought with her, and handed her one.

“Wow.” She said, clearly amazed. She frowned pensively. “You know you’re a complete mystery?”

“How’s that?”

“Well…” She drawled, not sure how to explain it.

“Come on, hit me with it. I open a bottle of champagne and you tell me I’m a mystery. That ought to make a man curious. So what brought this on?”

“I don’t know. It’s just that… you opened the bottle like an expert…”

“And the fact that I didn’t waste half the bottle by spilling it on the floor is a bad thing?”

“No. It just reminded me that I don’t know much about your past. Sure, you told me about how you ended here, but I mean, before that. I don’t know anything. What your life was like, how you ended up in California in the first place… that kind of stuff.”

Spike looked pensive for a moment, looking down at the glass he was holding. He finally took a deep breath. “And you got all that from the way I opened the bottle?”

“Yeah. It seemed natural. As if you’d opened bottles of champagne all your life.”

“Well, my dad was rich and he loved to impress his rich friends. So we always had champagne around the house.”

“Tell me more.” She asked, eager to find out everything she could about him.

“Why don’t we toast first, pet?”

She lifted a questioning eyebrow. “Is this your way of avoiding?”

“No. It’s my way of saying that this champagne is very tempting, and I’d also like to taste that delicious food you brought with you some time soon. So let’s toast, sit on the floor around the coffee table to eat, and then we can talk.” His eyes brightened with something close to lust when he spotted one of the food containers. “Are those chicken wings?”

Buffy chuckled. “Yes. And they’re spicy too.”

He licked his lips in anticipation.

She sighed exaggeratedly. “I just found out it IS possible to be jealous of chicken wings. Who would have known? If only you’d look at me like that…”

“Oi! I do so. It’s just that, these are the main course, and you’re the dessert. I’ll go back to looking at you with hunger when I’m done with the wings. Promise.”

They laughed and Buffy raised her glass. “Here’s to true love found when we least expected it and we both thought it would never happen, hopes of finding a way to overcome the obstacles lurking in front of us, and a new year that just HAS to be much better than the one we just left behind because there is no way it can be worst. Oh… and to chicken wings. Cheers.”

“Amen to that, pet. Cheers!”

Not taking their eyes off each other, they drank from their glasses.

“Is THAT plum pudding?” Spike asked excitedly before getting off the couch to go sit on the floor on the other side of the small table.

Buffy giggled at his childlike behavior and went to sit in front of him. “So that was a good idea then? I wasn’t sure.”

“Are you bloody kidding me? That’s a brilliant idea, pet!”

“The lady who owns the bakery close to my house is British. I talked to her this morning and when I told her my boyfriend was British and I wanted something special for him, she said that plum pudding is a big holiday tradition in the UK. She didn’t have any left for sale but she had some that she makes for her friends and family and since she likes me, she gave me one. If it’s as good as her croissants, it must be pretty amazing.”

He dug in the chicken wings and eagerly shoved one in his waiting mouth. “She said the truth. It is a big holiday tradition in England. But that’s not why I’m so happy. My grandmum used to make the best plum pudding in all the country. Nana would cook such an incredible feast for Christmas eve or New Year’s eve that I would make sure not to eat all day to make room for all the food she’d make. She was great. An old, wise and loving angel. She had white hair down to her waist that she’d always pull up into a complicated knot, smelled like candies, had a warm smile and sparkling blue eyes.”

“Is that where you get your eyes from?”

“We looked a lot alike, yeah.”

“What happened to her?” Buffy asked while helping herself to a generous portion of green curry chicken.

The only restaurant she had found that was open on New Year’s Eve was a Thai restaurant, but it was all good because Spike had already told her not too long ago that he loved Thai food. Then she had stopped at a pizza place to buy tons of chicken wings, another of Spike’s weaknesses. So they had green curry chicken, beef satay, coconut steamed rice and chicken wings. Enough food to feed an army, but at the rate Spike was shoving the food down his throat, it wouldn‘t be a problem at all.

“She died of cancer when I was eight. My life sucked after that because she was the only person in my family who gave a damn about me.”

Buffy looked up at him. “Don’t say that. I’m sure it’s not true. What about your mom and your dad?” She had such a loving relationship with her own mother that it was hard for her to believe that a mother could not love her own child. But the sadness in Spike’s eyes told her otherwise.

He snickered. “My mother left dad and I two years after nana‘s death. The day of my tenth birthday. The woman never loved me.”

“Spike. You are her son. How could she not love you?”

“Let’s just say I wasn’t her idea of the perfect son. My parents, Ethan and Cecily, both had flamboyant personalities. They were wealthy socialites and they always had something exciting going on in their lives. I can see why I wouldn’t be the kind of child they had dreamed of. I was a shy, romantic, introverted boy who would spend entire afternoon reading books or writing poetry under a tree at the far end of the estate. I was lonely but it didn’t bother me. The only kids my age I would hang out with were my parent’s friends’ children. And they always had a great time torturing me and making fun of my poetry. My parents had nothing else to say about it but that I should toughen up and stop embarrassing them. Mum--God bless her--once told one of her friends that she was ashamed to say I was her son. I overheard and never forgot those words. So you see, I doubt she had that much trouble leaving me behind.”

Buffy couldn’t quite meet his eyes. “Did you… love her?”

The chuckle he let out was devoid of any of humor. “With all my foolish young heart. Which made it even harder. The bloody bint never even mentioned my name in the note she left my dad that day. She said she wasn’t happy with her life, she needed to find herself, and that was it. Two years later, I got a postcard from her. I remember because it was a week after my birthday. It didn’t say anything about me, didn’t say that she missed me, that she apologized, that she loved me, not even a mention of my birthday. All it said was that she was doing well and that she had met someone and that Brazil was fabulous. Never heard from her again.”

“I’m sorry I brought it up, Spike.” Buffy whispered, playing with her chicken. She had lost her appetite.

“Don’t be. You were right; you should know these things about my past. Besides, it doesn’t hurt all that much anymore. I’m more angry than hurt.”

“What did your dad and you do after that?”

“My dad decided that we should move to the promised land. The bloody United States of bloody America. He wanted to do business here. I learned to love it--though I’m not so sure anymore--but at first, I hated it. The moving from one city to the other probably didn’t help any. I think we lived in ten different places in five years. New York, Boston, Chicago, Seattle, Houston, Louisiana and finally, L.A. That’s where I drew the line. I told him I was going to finish high school and go to university there. He said fine, and left. I think he was glad to be rid of me. He always blamed me for my mom’s departure. So he sent money to pay for my expenses, but that was the only contact I had with him.”

A little voice in her head was telling her to shut up because the conversation was so emotional for him and she didn’t want to make it worst, but Buffy couldn’t help her curiosity. “Clem told me that…”

“He died?”

She nodded.

“Yeah, he did. Last time I heard from the bloody bastard was after I got arrested. I called him and he told me I was a disgrace to his name. Never heard his voice again. Two months later, just after I arrived here, I was told that he had been shot. Probably someone he owed money to who was tired of waiting for him to pay back. He left me all his money, which was absolutely nothing compared to the fortune we had when I was younger, but it’s still a bit of money. Clem is taking care of it for me.”

“Geez, way to bring the mood down with my stupid questions, huh? But I’m glad you told me all that. Sure, I could have chosen a better time to ask, but I want to know everything about you.”

He leaned over the table to give her a quick, chicken wing flavored, kiss. “Don’t worry about the mood, pet. Nothing could ruin this night. But since we’re into dark, depressing topics, you’ll have to share something too.”

“I guess that’s fair.” She served them a refill of champagne and then told him the story about her mom’s cancer.

“Well, pet, I can honestly say that this story contributed nicely to our little moping session.”

Buffy gave him her warmest smile, despite the seriousness of the conversation. “Oh no, don’t think it’s a sad story. I mean, yes, these were very hard days for our family. But some positive came out of it in the end.”

“Really? How so?” He asks, genuinely curious how she could turn her mother’s cancer into something positive.

“Well, for one thing, I will never take my mom for granted again. I now cherish every single moment I spend with her. Every second in her company is precious to me. If it hadn't happened, I would still think that mom would always be there. Also, before the whole thing happened, Dawn and I were the very picture of sibling rivalry. We loved each other, but we were arguing non stop. We still bicker, but it’s all in good fun and we grew closer because we had to rely on each other. I love that little brat and would give my life to protect her. That’s something I didn’t have before and I’m grateful for it.”

Spike was looking at her with undisguised admiration. Every reason he had to love her had been multiplied by a hundred after what she’d just told him. How could he not find the good in what had happened to him, when this woman sitting in front of him could find it in the darkest moment of her own life?

“You are so courageous, Buffy. I wish I could have your strength. Sure, you brought some light into my life, but when I’m not with you, it’s dark everywhere I look. ”

“Spike, don’t give up hope. I don’t think I’m strong enough to hope for both of us.”

“Hope for what, luv? It’s not like I have a future you know.”

He cut two portions of plum pudding and served them in the little plastic plates she had brought. Buffy looked away to hide the tears that welled up in her eyes at his statement.

“Why can’t you hope? Don’t you have any faith in me? Do you think I’ll just sit back and watch you suffer in this goddamn hellhole? You know what I did when I woke up this morning and realized it was the last day of the old year? I promised myself that next year, we’d be celebrating New Year together, at home, surrounded by friends and family. I’ll cook all day and pray that it will be edible, you’ll help me by cleaning up the house and doing grocery runs for whatever I forgot to buy, you’ll complain about the tie I’ll make you wear saying that it makes you look like a pansy. Your friend Clem will come, and my mom and Dawn, and…”

With every word she said, Spike’s expression darkened. His jaw was clenched and he closed his eyes until he couldn’t take it anymore and had to stop her.

“Stop! Please, stop, Buffy. Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”

His words were hard, efficiently snapping her out of her little fantasy.

“W-what?..” She asked, confused by his outburst.

“Can’t you see? You put all those ideas in my head and make me believe. You dangle something I can never have in front of my eyes, but just out of reach.”

He stood up abruptly and started pacing. When he stopped to look at her, his face was angry, but his eyes were glistening with tears.

“What is this? Why are you saying these things to me? Do you really believe what you’re saying, or are you just cruel? I don’t get it! What are you thinking?! Do you have any soddin’ idea how much it hurts? Do you know how much I want all this? I dream about this every fucking night, Buffy. Every night. I want it all, but I won’t have it. I. WILL. DIE. HERE.” He spat the last words as if it were poison burning his tongue.

He was breathing hard, his chest constricted by the pain her words had awoken in him. It was always there, and the images she’d brought up reopened a wound he had been careful not to touch. But his anger came to a screeching halt, and his pain took a backseat to hers when he realized she was sobbing with her face in her hands. Her small body shaking from the force of her tears. She was mumbling something that he couldn’t hear.

Realizing what he had done, Spike rushed to her side and gathered her into his arms. “Oh God, Buffy…”

“I’m so sorry! I’m sorry, Spike. Please… so sorry.” She hiccupped, hiding her face against his chest, her hands clinging to his shirt. “I didn’t want to make you hurt, I swear. I just thought--I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry.”

“Buffy! Stop. Come on, pet. Stop crying, you’re gonna make me cry too. Please, kitten, look at me.” He took her face between his hands to force her to look at him. Her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks wet with tears.

“I’m the one who should be sorry, not you. You have nothing to be sorry about. I’m a right bloody wanker for doing this to you. No matter how I feel, I should have had some control instead of going off like that. I know you meant well.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you. I just wanted… to give you hope.” Her voice was so low that he could barely hear what she said.

“Buffy, it‘s OK, pet. Don‘t cry. Hey--It‘s OK.”

She tried to look down, but he stopped her. “No. Look at me. What you’ve done for me tonight, it’s amazing. I had no right to act like this and ruin it. No one has ever done something like this for me, Buffy. No one. I can’t begin to tell you what it means to me that you’d go through all this trouble for me. And there I am, ruining it by being a selfish bastard. Don’t cry because of me, please.”

She threw her arms around his neck and hid her face against his shoulder, holding him to her. “I don’t want us to fight, Spike.” Her words were muffled by his shoulder.

“So let’s not.”

He held in his arms for the longest time, just caressing her hair and not saying anything. Then, he reluctantly pushed her away.

Her eyes searched his face for answers, wondering why he wasn’t holding her anymore. But he only smiled.

“The clock on that wall says its thirty seconds to midnight. I thought you’d want to know that.”

Her mouth opened in realization. “Oh! I almost forgot!”

They watched in silence as the seconds ticked by, then, when it hit midnight, their lips met in a heated kiss.

“Happy New Year, Buffy.” Spike said when they broke apart.

“Happy New Year, Spike. I love you.”

“I love you too… and I’m sorry for being such a buggering wanker earlier.”

“And I’m sorry for being such a buggering insensitive idiot earlier… whatever buggering means.”

They kissed again, lost in each other. This time, Buffy was the one to break the passionate lip lock. “Should we eat dessert, or keep making out?”

“Can’t we do both?”

She smiled. “I don’t see why not.”

Spike pulled her on his lap and started feeding her plum pudding, alternating between bites and kisses. That’s how Giles found them a couple of minutes later.

His already somber expression got worst when he realized something. “You didn’t lock the bloody door!”

Buffy paled. “Oh God! I forgot…”

“So much for being careful, Buffy.” Giles snapped at her. “But that’s the least of our worries right now.”

Both Buffy and Spike stood up at once.

“Why? What’s going on?”

“Turns out, the excuse I used to get you here wasn’t as unjustified as I thought it was. A riot started in the cafeteria ten minutes ago. We contained it, but Devon got hurt. He’s in a bad shape and I’m not sure he’ll make it. He was rushed to the hospital. Jake was with him and he’s really shaken.”

“Shit. Anybody else was hurt?” She asked while readjusting her clothes.

“A few prisoners, but nothing too serious. You’d better come with me. We’ll drop Spike by the infirmary on the way.”

“Why?”

“Because that’s where he’s supposed to be right now. That was the excuse I used to buy him time with you. Let’s go.”

Giles put the handcuffs back on Spike’s wrists and the two blondes followed him out of the office.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 29
Support in rough times

“Be nice to prison boys,” Faith snickered after taking a vicious bite out of her double chocolate doughnut. “Offer them a midnight gathering in the cafeteria with half-decent food to celebrate New Year, and they turn it into something bloody. I mean, Devon was no angel, but he still didn’t deserve this. It could have been me, you know?”

“No Faith, it wouldn’t have been you. The only reason it happened to him is because Devon never respected the prisoners and by acting the way he did, he made himself a main target for their anger.” Willow said while blowing on the steam rising from her cup of coffee. The week’s events had left her usually perky voice flat and lifeless, and her tired green eyes didn‘t have their familiar spark.

Buffy remained silent, staring pensively out the window of the coffee shop at the passerbys. The Espresso Pump was bursting with activity, crammed with loud and cheery people, but the happy atmosphere wasn’t nearly enough to chase away the gloom at the table by the window. Willow, Faith and herself had stopped for comfort food and coffees after the guard’s funeral, hoping to calm their raging emotions. They had asked Giles to come with them, but he had declined saying that a stiff drink was waiting for him at home.

The past week had been hell for all the prison staff. It had been even harder on Buffy. The warden had been the one to contact Devon’s family to tell them the gruesome new, then she’d spent the week going back and forth between Sunnydale and L.A. to hand out reports, talk in front of an assembly of men in suits who looked at her as if she was the cause of the guard’s death, and sign paperwork. She was emotionally drained.

“It wouldn’t have happened to you.” The redhead continued, trying to sooth Faith‘s restless agitation and anger over New Year‘s drama. “You know how the guys respect you and how protective of you they can get. Remember when that new inmate tried to attack you?”

“Yeah, the poor dude got some major ass-whupping for that one.” Faith managed a small smile at the memory. “Good times.”

The brunette sighed heavily and they all remained silent for a moment, lost in their own not-so-happy thoughts.

“I know it happened at Donovan last month--a guard got stabbed in the yard--” Faith finally said, breaking the heavy silence. “But that’s something I never thought would happen in our neck of the woods. Things are always so quiet at SunnyD that it came as a shock. I always thought we ended up with all the fluffy puppies of the criminal world.”

Willow smiled slightly at the comment, but Buffy didn’t react. Faith gave Willow a meaningful look. Both women had noticed Buffy’s uncharacteristic silence and they were worried about her.

“B? Are you all right?”

It took a moment, but finally processing the fact that she was ‘B’ and therefore, she was the one Faith was talking to, she turned to look at her.

“I’m sorry. What did you say?”

“I said, are you all right? You haven’t said a word since we arrived here. You’re getting me all worried and I’m not used to caring. So spill before my brain explodes.”

Buffy took a sip of her now cold vanilla latte before answering. “Jim dandy. Why? Should I have a reason not to be on board the happy train?”

“Hey, sarcasm girl, chill. Excuse me for caring.” Faith snapped.

The blonde looked down, ashamed by her own attitude. “Sorry, Faith. I didn’t mean to sound like a bitch. It’s just…”

“Too much emotion for a week?” Willow provided helpfully.

“Yeah, that. It feels like I’m stuck in a tornado and it won’t let me go until I’m dizzy enough.”

“Not in Kansa anymore, Dorothy?” Faith smiled slightly.

“Nope. More like the mouth of Hell if you ask me. This week has been so intense and crazy that I can’t even think straight anymore. I can’t wait to get my life back. After hearing the news on TV, my mom left about ten messages on my answering machine, along with the other forty I had waiting, and I haven’t had time to call her back yet.”

“You’re mom worries about you?” Faith whistled. “Nice. You know, I’ve heard of mothers caring about their kids, but it never happened to me so I assumed that was fairytale bullshit.”

“I’m sure your mom understands, Buffy. And if she got it from the news, she probably knows you’re fine. They did say the victim was a male…” She looked at the two women sitting at the table with her. “Didn’t they? I think they did, but you can never be sure. Because if they didn’t, then that’d be of the bad. She could think…”

“They did, Willow.” Buffy interrupted before the redhead’s babbling got too out of hand. “Doesn’t matter though. She still worries about me and now, she’s going to worry even more. She knows the prison is a rough work environment. Hearing that a guard was killed at my prison isn’t gonna give her warm happy feelings. But that’s not why I’m so upset. The guy was under my protection. All of you are. And I let that happen to him. I should have prevented it.”

Faith snorted at that comment. “What’s with the super hero complex, girl? Give me a break… No one could have prevented this and you know that. The only way to avoid a riot would be to have the guys locked up 24/7. Things like that are bound to happen. Especially since they’re getting more clever every day when it comes to making weapons from scratch. If those damn bastards used their brains as much for studying as they use it to come up with new and interesting ways to hurt others, the prison would be full of doctors, lawyers and engineers.”

“That’d be interesting. We could turn the prison into a genius factory.” Willow added, her green eyes dancing with humor.

They all chuckled but their mirth died quickly. Buffy sighed.

“I feel like such a hypocrite. I mean… here I am, all upset, and I didn’t even like the guy. He devoted all his waking hours to talking behind my back and making sure that everybody hates me.”

“It’s normal you feel that way, Buffy. When someone dies, people usually spend hours saying nice things about that person and how they’re going to miss him. But Devon wasn’t really nice.”

“Did you know him well?” Buffy asked Willow.

Faith snorted and Buffy gave her curious look.

“What?” Then she jumped to the wrong conclusion and looking at the red head, her eyes widened in shock. “You didn’t sleep with him, did you?”

Faith burst out laughing and Willow turned red.

“God, NO!”

“Then why did you laugh, Faith?”

“Because it’s kinda funny how Will hated the guy’s guts, and yet, owes him her sappy romantic love story. It’s deliciously ironic… But I think Miss Smarty-pants should be the one to tell the story.”

Buffy looked at Willow expectantly.

“It’s no big deal, really. It’s just that--well--Devon used to be the front man for Dingoes Ate My Baby before they were known. He was a jerk, but one day, he came to work and invited everybody to his gig at The Bronze. I hated his guts, but you know me… I’m a softy. So when I found out no one was going, I decided to be nice and stop by. That’s how I met Oz. A few weeks later, the guys decided to kick Devon out of the band and Oz became the lead singer. After that, Devon started calling me Yoko. As if I had anything to do with him getting kicked out of the band” Willow pouted, obviously still upset.

Buffy didn’t know what to say. “Wow. That’s… wow. So I guess I’m not the only one with conflicted feelings here today?”

“Nope. Make that two of us.”

“Hey! What about me?” Faith huffed, annoyed at being left out. “I have conflicted feeling too you know.”

“That’s hardly front page news, Faith.” Buffy pointed out, a smirk on her face. The brunette narrowed her eyes threateningly, but didn’t answer.

“Did something happen with Devon?” Willow asked, unable to help her curiosity.

“You bet! I kicked his ass good and proper once. I had just started at SunnyD and Devon thought his seniority gave him the right to try the goods. He cornered me one night in the lunch room and tried to feel me up. Let’s just say he left the room with a nasty black eye and couldn’t sit for a week. I’m sure his balls where the size of grapefruits when I was done with him. Or maybe just regular size since he had very small ones to start with. ”

“And now that he’s dead, you’re feeling guilty about this?” Willow asked with a warm, compassionate smile.

Faith snickered. “As if. I just wanted to share a funny story to cheer you girls up.”

Willow rolled her eyes while Buffy tried in vain to suppress her laughter. But all the stress she had accumulated over the past week was suddenly too much for her and she started giggling madly. Her hilarity was contagious and it didn’t take long for the two other women to give in. Soon, they were all in hysterics with people at the tables around giving them strange looks.

When Buffy calmed down enough to speak, she wiped the tears from her eyes and looked at her two friends.

“You do realize we’re nuts, right?”

“Speaking for myself, I’ve always been on the crazy side of the tracks so I’m not too worried. But I seriously think the last week would have turned anybody wacko. I‘m just shocked that we haven’t been trying on straight jackets for size yet. ” Faith winked playfully at Buffy.

“At least, we can still laugh. So I think there is hope for us.” Willow added cheerfully.

Buffy smiled at her childhood friend. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy walked into the cafeteria, closely followed by Giles and Faith. The rest of the staff was already there waiting for her to arrive. Two hundred and forty six inmates were gathered in the room, sitting at the tables. Their usual rowdiness had been somewhat toned down by the seriousness of the situation. Even the ones currently in isolation had been brought out to hear what the warden had to say. The only ones who would be missing the speech were the twelve who were locked away permanently in what they called the ‘prison inside the prison’. These were guys who had committed crimes while inside, and that included the two guys who had attacked Devon on that fateful night of New Year’s Eve. But they didn’t need to hear her speech because they’d already had their own version of it when Buffy had stopped by for a personal visit. Unfortunately for them, their version had been a whole lot scarier than the one the rest of the guys were about to hear.

The guards, as well as the other staff members, all looked up when the woman they now recognized as their boss walked in. Her gaze was glacial, her body rigid with barely controlled rage. The inmates instantly started whispering amongst themselves, the hushed sound growing louder as Buffy stood there in silence. The longer she remained immobile and quiet, the more confused both staff and prisoners became. It lasted until her cold stare started making everybody uncomfortable. One by one, the prisoners shut their mouths, until silence was finally restored. Almost.

One man kept talking, not caring that he could be heard, and showing a lack of respect that was typical of him. Buffy focused her murderous stare on the dark haired prisoner, but he seemed oblivious. When he chuckled at some clever comment he’d made, she lost it.

In three quick strides, she was in the prisoner’s face, grabbing him roughly by the front of his shirt and lifting him slightly off the chair in her fury. “Do you think it’s funny, Parker? Do you? Cause watch me not laugh.”

She held his glare steadily until he looked down, intimidated by the hatred he saw in the young woman’s eyes.

Buffy finally turned to look at two of the guards standing there. “Take him away to the hole. See who’s laughing now.”

She smiled coldly as both of Parker’s arms were grabbed by the guards and he was lifted off the chair.

“Anybody else thinks it’s funny?”

She waited a beat for an answer, but the inmates were all looking down in silence. Even Spike, who was sitting with Gunn right next to where she was standing, couldn’t quite look at her.

“Didn’t think so.”

But as the guards attempted to put the handcuffs on an enraged Parker, the prisoner managed to shove them away and lunged at Buffy. In a heartbeat, Spike was on his feet to interfere, closely followed by Gunn. To her credit, Buffy didn’t flinch or even back away. She just stood there glaring menacingly at Parker while more guards rushed to her side, worried that this would turn into another riot.

Spike put himself protectively between the warden and Parker while Gunn held the other prisoner back from behind, his arms wrapped painfully tight around the smaller man.

“What the bloody hell did you think you were doing there, you stupid git?” Spike said, his voice dangerously calm. The look in his eyes was a promise of excruciating pain in Parker’s near future if he didn’t back off.

“Attempting to wipe the smile off that fucking whore’s face. That’s what.”

Spike took a step forward, his self-control wearing thin. No one called Buffy a whore. She put her hand on his arm to stop him, and he did, but the clenching and unclenching of his fists and the tension in his jaw told her that one more word from Parker and Spike would lose it. She prayed that the bastard would shut his mouth; she didn‘t want Spike to get into a fight with him.

“Watch it, mate. The bird’s doing her job, just like Devon was. He might have been a right bastard, but he didn’t deserve what happened to him. It’s wankers like you that make all our lives miserable in here. So maybe you should take a moment to rethink what you were about to do. I wager you’ll have a lot of time alone in the hole to think, so use it. And if you don’t see the light and still feel like attacking the warden, you and me will have a go. You can be sure of it. Now bugger off.”

As if on cue, the two guards, angry that they had let Parker escape their hold, pushed him roughly face first against a table and slapped the handcuffs on his wrists.

The whole room watched in silence as Parker was led away. Buffy turned to Gunn and Spike and gave them a quick grateful nod.

“Thank you. Both of you. You’re Gunn, right?” She asked the tall black man.

“Yes ma’am. Don’t worry, it was nothing. Parker’s an asshole.”

She smiled at the comment, her eyes darting to Spike. He was trying to pretend that nothing happened, but she could tell he was upset. Deciding not to say anything and thank him in private instead, she turned back to the room.

“Life just got a whole lot harder… for all of you. Leaders, followers, innocent, guilty, I don’t give a fuck. I try to keep life bearable for you in here, and THAT’S HOW YOU THANK ME?! Mark my words: you will all pay for this heinous crime. The next month will be HELL.” She paused to look around the room, making sure she put her point across. “Maybe this way, next time some smart ass decides to start a party, you’ll stop him instead of following like sheep. You lost my trust and now you’ll have to work to get it back. Let the lesson be learned.”

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Buffy was emotionally exhausted after talking to everybody for more than half an hour, describing the punishment in detail and laying out the new rules that would be applied for the next month. She was now walking down a hall with Giles and Faith after leaving the cafeteria and the protesting prisoners, when a small group of the guards stopped her.

“Ms. Summers?”

She turned to face them, unsure of what they wanted. She looked up at the one who had addressed her, a tall black guy who looked like a bodybuilder. For a second, she tried remembering his name. Roger?… no, Raymond.

“Yes, Raymond. Is there something wrong?” She looked questioningly at the five other guards standing a step behind him.

The black giant looked almost embarrassed. He couldn’t quite meet her eyes when he spoke. “We’ve been talking, Ms. Summers. Ya know… After all that happened this week and all that. We just thought, well…”

Buffy sighed tiredly. “What is it you want to tell me, Raymond?”

Her voice was lifeless, as if she’d used all the energy she had left to speak to the prisoners and now the fight had drained out of her. If these guys were there to tell her how incompetent she was or how much they hated working for her, she wouldn’t have the strength to even answer, let alone to defend herself.

“We’ve acted like real jerks towards you Ms. Summers. That wasn’t right.”

There were a few nods from the men behind him. Buffy frowned in confusion, but let him finish what he had to say.

“Since you arrived here, we did everything we could to make your life horrible and you didn’t deserve that. You’re doing a great job here and we wanted to say that we’re sorry and you can count on us to back you up from now on.”

Buffy was dumbfounded and it took her a few moments to collect her thoughts and get over her shock. She finally managed a smile, eyes bright with the tears she was not going to shed in front of them.

“Thank you… All of you. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

She could at least say that today, she’d won a battle.

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Chapter 30
Intervention

The door bell rang for the third time when Buffy finally decided to get up to investigate who had the audacity to so rudely interrupt her sleep. Didn’t matter that it was three in the afternoon… still rude.

She put on her baby blue satin robe and matching fluffy slippers and tiredly dragged her feet to the front door. There, on her porch, stood almost everybody she knew. Her jaw dropped and she stared at them, unable to form a word.

Cordelia, holding Camille in her arms, led the pack. One step behind her where Xander, Willow, Dawn and Joyce, and they were all wearing smiles that were almost creepy in their put on cheerfulness.

“What a lovely vision you are, Miss Summers. The ‘I-just-rolled-out-of-bed’ look suits you.” Cordelia said, fake smile still firmly in place.

Buffy glared at her friend, still too groggy to think of a suitable reply.

“You do know it’s, like, three in the afternoon, right?” Dawn commented. She was the only one who didn’t bother hiding her amusement at the pathetic sight her sister presented.

“Didn’t know there was a law stating that I have to get up in the a.m. But then again, I’m no lawyer so what do I know?.. What are you guys all doing here?”

“The L.A. gang is here to cheer you up Sleepy-head.” Cordelia exclaimed with enthusiasm. You could take the girl out of the cheerleader’s squad, but you certainly couldn’t take the cheerleader out of the girl.

Cordelia turned to the others, waiting for them to approve. “Isn’t that right?”

Everybody nodded vigorously, except Joyce.

“Technically, I live in San Francisco, so…”

“And I live here in Sunnydale.” Willow added, frowning slightly.

But at Cordelia’s raised eyebrow, they both hurriedly changed the subject and decided it was safer to agree with her.

“Cordy is right, honey. We’re all here to see how you’re doing and show you support after the horrible week you probably just had.”

There it was, Buffy thought. The worried-mom look. She tried her best to smile comfortingly at her mom, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Look guys, that was nice of you and all, but…”

Xander, who was loaded with bags, pushed his way through the door. Buffy didn’t have a choice but to step aside to avoid a collision.

“We’ve got food.” He said as a form of excuse.

Everybody else followed him inside, ignoring Buffy’s groan of protest.

“What IS this? An intervention? I appreciate the thought, really, I do. But I’m not depressed, I’m TIRED. And what is the best way to help tired people?.. Letting them sleep!” She waited for a reaction from the invaders, but they merely started setting the table. “Please?”

Buffy’s brain was having a hard time processing what had just happened. One minute, she was comfortably cocooned in her warm bed, the next, she was in the living room and there’s a bunch of people happily chatting and moving around in her kitchen. The smell of food, probably lunch if the smell was any indication, made her grimace in disgust. All she wanted was a very strong cup of coffee, maybe a toast, and some peace and quiet. She wouldn’t get what she wanted any time soon.

**God, what is this smell?.. Lasagna?! Ew.**

Seeing her big sister turning slightly green, Dawn walked up to her. She took Buffy’s hand and started tugging her towards the stairs.

“C’mon. Let’s get you all decent and pretty.”

“I don’t wanna.” Buffy whined.

Dawn stopped and turned to look at her. “What,” She whispered in a conspiratorial tone “You don’t want to get away from the cheerful intervention? I thought…”

She giggled when Buffy perked up at the thought and quickly nodded. They made their way to her bedroom and Dawn closed the door behind them. But when Buffy ran and took a dive into her bed, swiftly pulling the sheets over her head, Dawn’s mouth opened in disapprobation.

“Hey!.. That’s not… HEY! You’re cheating you big freak! I brought you here to get you dressed, not go back to bed.”

Buffy’s face reappeared from beneath the sheets, but only long enough so she could speak. “And I told you I don’t WANNA.” And she disappeared again.

“God, you‘re such a baby. Anybody looking at us right now would definitely think that you’re the college kid and I’m the mature adult. You do realize that, right?” She sighed when she didn’t get an answer. “Fine. Be that way.”

Dawn took her shoes off and climbed into bed with her infuriating sister. “Come on, move over, you bed hog.”

Buffy scooted over to give Dawn some room, and sighed contentedly when her not-so-little sister put her arm around her and cuddled. After a moment spent in that peace and quiet Buffy had been dreaming of since the moment her friends had walked in, Dawn spoke again.

“So Buff… What up?”

“Dawn! Don’t say that! ‘Wassup’ was already bad enough, now you kids had to go and remove the ‘s’ all together? That sounds so dumb.”

“And it also makes you feel like an old fart, doesn’t it?”

Buffy pouted. “Yeah.”

The brunette giggled, her blues eyes sparkling with mischief. “All right. What’SSsss up then? How come you’re not happy to see us? And what’s with your sudden inability to get your ass out of bed?”

“What’s wrong with sleeping the day away? I’ve had a rough week and it’s my day off. ”

“Yeah, I figured that much after I called you for the tenth time and you still haven’t called me back. So… That bad huh?”

“Yep. But it’s over now and everything seems to be back in order. Except that I’m exhausted. I think you’re right. I am an old fart.”

They smiled at each other.

“I’m always right. I get that from mom.”

“Smart ass.”

Dawn grinned at the comment, but her smile vanished quickly. “… You’re not happy to see us then?”

Buffy played with a strand of her sister’s long chocolate hair and waited a beat before answering.

“Of course I am. All my favorite people in the world here to show me support. How could I not be? But…”

“But you didn’t feel like having company today?”

“Something like that, yeah. But it’s ok. I’ll get out of bed, put on some clothes and a happy smile. I’m fine, Dawnie. I swear.”

The younger girl hesitated for a moment. “It’s not your fault what happened to that guy. I know you have a tendency to hold yourself responsible when something bad happens, like with Tara…”

“I know, Dawn. But I can’t help feeling a little bit guilty. The fact that I was spending some quality time with Spike when it happened…”

“Has NOTHING to do with it. If you hadn’t been with Spike, you would have been here, or in San Francisco with Mom and I. Same diff. Don’t go thinking it was some kind of punishment for spending time with your sweetie. Shit like that happens. At least, now you know not to throw the prisoners a Valentine’s Day bash.”

Buffy snickered. “Cute.”

Dawn grinned and disentangled herself from her sister’s arms to get up. “I know. Come on. Get up and put on that happy smile. I’ll go get you some clothes.”

Buffy sat up while her little sister disappeared in the walk-in closet. There was a soft knock on the door.

“Yeah?”

The door opened to reveal Cordelia.

“Hey Cord.”

“Hey yourself. Can I come in?”

Buffy’s eyebrows shot up in mocked surprise. “Since when are you all Miss Polite? Who are you and what have you done to my Cordelia?”

“You’re a riot, Summers. You know I can be polite… sometimes.” She sat on the bed next to Buffy. “Where’s Dawn?”

“In there stealing all my clothes.” She motioned with her head toward the closet door. “She said she was gonna find clothes for me to wear, but I’m pretty sure she’s putting half my stuff in a bag so she can sneak back in later and take it with her to L.A.”

There was a muffled “Hey! I heard that!” from the closet and Buffy and Cordelia both smiled at the familiarity of the scene. Dawn borrowing Buffy’s clothes had been the sisters’ number one argument topic when they were younger.

When it seemed obvious that Cordelia wouldn’t elaborate on why she was there, Buffy sighed and asked.

“So, are you here to ask me ‘what’s up’ too, or is there another reason you wanted to see me alone?”

“Well…” Her best friend looked down at her hands, hesitant, which was very uncharacteristic of her.

“Well what?”

“I was just wondering if you’re still trying to find a way to prove that your ‘boyfriend’ is innocent. I know with everything that happened since the holidays, you probably didn’t have much time to work on it.”

Buffy frowned, wondering where her friend was going with this. “Yes. I’m still trying. Not right now because things have been a bit crazy for me, but I’m not going to give up if that’s where you’re going with this.”

Cordelia stood up and handed Buffy what looked like a business card. She took it and looked at it curiously.

“No, that’s not where I’m going. I’ve been thinking about your situation and I realize that you’re going to go through with this. So I thought of this friend of mine who could help you. Give him a call. I already talked to him and he said he’d give you his ‘friendly price’. Believe me, his usual prices are not so friendly.”

Her eyes still on the card, Buffy didn’t know what to say. “Thanks Cordy. It means a lot…”

“Hey, don’t mention it.” She tossed her long hair over her shoulder and gave the blonde her brightest smile, her usual confidence firmly back in place. “Get dressed. Lunch is ready.”

Cordelia walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her.

“What was that?” Dawn asked, walking back into the bedroom with an armful of clothes.

“Not sure, Dawnie. I’ll find out tonight.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy was sitting at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee and the phone in front of her. Everybody had left about an hour ago and she’d been sitting there since. The sun had set, leaving her in the dark, the only light coming from the halogen spots above the breakfast bar. She turned the business card in her hand, looking at it as if she’d just seen it for the first time. She was stalling and she knew it. So she grabbed the phone and dialed the number quickly before she could change her mind.

“Wyndham-Pryce Investigations, How may I help you?”

“Mr. Wyndham-Pryce ? My name is Buffy Summers. A friend of mine gave me your number… She said you could help me.”

“Ah. Miss Summers. Yes. Cordelia told me you might call. Please, you can call me Wesley.”

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Chapter 31
Cyber Virgin

Spike put the paint buckets down and rolled up his sleeves. Gunn was still pouting so he tried ignoring him. The wanker hadn't stopped bitching for the past twenty four hours about being treated like everybody else. Spike hadn't expected anything when he'd jumped to Buffy's help and wasn't surprised at all that he'd have to go through all the punishments just like everybody else. He knew Buffy couldn't risk having someone question her actions by giving him special treatment. But when she had described what everybody would have to do and what the new rules were going to be over the next month, Gunn had just assumed that it didn't apply to them because they had helped her. So when he'd learned that just like everybody else, he'd be allowed only one visit a week, one phone call a week and one hour of free time a day, not to mention all the chores she had planned for them, he hadn't been too thrilled. He still wasn't.

"Damn! You'd think they'd give us the 'warden saviors treatment'. Maybe some fried chicken and a beer. But noooo. Instead, were stuck here painting the fucking fence like everybody else, with half the guys giving us murderous looks. That's not the kind of gratefulness I was expecting."

Losing patience, Spike smacked Gunn behind the head with a paint brush. 'Would you shut your bloody gob about this? We helped because it was the right soddin' thing to do. Not because we were expecting some kind of special treatment."

"Maybe that's why you did it, you being all British and gentlemanly. But I did it because you were about to get your face broken... And because she's kinda hot and I don't like seeing hot chicks being slapped around by a little bitch like Parker." Gunn knelt down to open the bucket. "But I was at least hoping we'd get to watch and laugh while everybody else did the chores."

"News flash, mate. You don't always get rewarded for doing something good. Besides, we're already in enough trouble as it is. In case you haven't noticed yet, everybody here, except the two geeks of doom, want to kick our arses for helping the bloody warden. Miss Summers probably knew that if she'd do us any favours, it'd be like signing our death sentence. Now shut up and paint."

Gunn started dipping his brush in the paint, but stopped when he saw what Spike was doing. The blonde man was busy lighting up a cigarette, leaning casually against the wall.

"What do you think you're doing?" Charles shouted indignantly. "You think I'm gonna paint while you're just standing there doing nothing?"

"Not doing nothing, mate. I'm watching to make sure you don't miss a spot. Being bloody helpful, is what I am."

Gunn threw a brush at him and Spike ducked just in time to avoid it, chuckling as he did.

"No bleedin' sense of humor." He bent down to pick up the brush and started working.

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Buffy sat at her desk at home, working on some paper work. She had left the computer on all day, not wanting to miss Spike if he got online. Thanks to her own stupid rules, he only had an hour of free time a day, and that for the next three weeks. And hour of free time, an hour of yard time, and meals. The rest of the prisoners' time would be used for the various chores her evil brain came up with. She was almost surprised Spike hadn't been pissed at her for making his own personal Hell even more Hellish. To be honest, when she had decided that the most effective way to make sure prisoners understood that riots would not be tolerated would be to punish everyone instead of just the instigators, she'd had a moment of hesitation when the thought of Spike crossed her mind. But she had gone against the impulse to be lenient on Spike's account; she couldn't not do her job because she was in love with one prisoner. That kind of attitude would only lead to badness. So that day, while speaking to the convicts, she had carefully avoided Spike's gaze, afraid that looking at him would make her resolve crumble. She had gone through with the punishment... which led to her current state of pouting. Yes, Buffy Summers, warden extraordinaire, was pouting like an upset little girl.

She wanted to hear Spike's voice but couldn't. They had agreed that he would keep his weekly phone calls for emergencies, or for the end of the week. Today being Monday night, the 'end of the week' thing couldn't be used. And there were no emergencies so to speak...

**I miss him, damn it. Doesn't that count as an emergency?** She thought in a way that even she found childish.

She knew she sounded like a spoiled brat, but she couldn't help herself. She just wanted to hear the sound of his voice. Instead, she was stuck waiting for him to instant message her, or email her. And that was if he'd even get online, which was a big 'if'. The prison only had ten computers for everybody's use. They could all be taken... or he could be busy doing something else, or he could...

Groaning in frustration, Buffy pushed aside the file she had been working on and put her head in her hands. It was almost 9 p.m. If he wasn't online by now, that meant he wouldn't be at all.

As if on cue, the MSN window popped up. Buffy's frown vanished in an instant, replaced by a brilliant smile.

[Bloody_poet] Hello Cutie

[Anne_pet] Hey Sexy. Been waiting for you all day :::pouts::: Missed you

[Bloody_poet] Sorry luv. Don't like to keep my girl waiting. But I have been waiting for the soddin' computer for hours. I put my name on the waiting list, but even the geek in charge of the room—who just happens to be my number one fan—couldn't get me in faster.

[Anne_pet] It's OK. You're here now. Wait. You have a fan? :D lol

[Bloody_poet] 's not bloody funny. The kid is a soddin' nuisance and I have to put up with him every time I want to email you.

[Anne_pet] Awww. Poor baby. The things you wouldn't do for me. Is it that little blonde guy who's into comic books and Sci-Fi stuff? The only time I talked to him, he compared me to some female super hero and went on and on about X-Men. He said something like "You are deceptively tiny and girlie, and yet, you hold the power to bestow unspeakable pain upon men. I can see you as a sexy comic book heroine."

[Bloody_poet] You'd need a costume. Would you consider leather?

[Anne_pet] In your dreams. Anyway, was that the guy you were talking about?

[Bloody_poet] That would be Andrew, yeah.

[Anne_pet] Geez, now I really do feel sorry for you. Do annoying people follow you everywhere you go? First your cellmate, now the comic book rat... Want me to send him somewhere else? Cafeteria duty maybe?

[Bloody_poet] No, don't worry about it. That'd be too cruel. The computer room is his sanctuary. Take him away from it would be like taking me away from my library.

[Anne_pet] All right then. Can't say I didn't offer. I just don't like my man to suffer.

Buffy reclined in her chair, making herself more comfortable. She rested her bare legs sideways on the desk and put the keyboard in her lap. Spike had an hour, and she intended to greedily use every second of his free time to talk to him.

[Bloody_poet] Where are you right now, pet? Just want a visual...

[Anne_pet] In what I call my office away from the office. It's my computer room.

[Bloody_poet] Bit more specific? Give me details; I just want to imagine I'm there with you.

[Anne_pet] Hum, details? OK, let's see... The walls are a dark shade of purple. On my right, there is a large window that takes almost the entire wall and gives me a view on the backyard. It has chiffon curtains same color as the walls but lighter, with gold embroidery. There's also a large painting in a tarnished gold frame on the wall behind me. It's of the ocean right after sunset when the sky is still reddish, with dark blue and some mauve. Very beautiful. Then, of course, you have my desk with my computer and all the gadgets that come with it... printer and all that stuff. It's covered with bills, envelopes, papers... you know me lol. And last, but not least... the piece of furniture that makes my designer friend, Cordelia, fall on her knees and beg me to get rid of it every time she sees it: an old, ratty, grey padded office chair that I stole from my mom when I left home. That thing must be at least a 100 years old, but it's comfy and I like it even if it doesn't go with the decor. Was that detailed enough for you?

[Bloody_poet] Yeah sweets, it was. Almost feels like I'm there. But you forgot a detail.

[Anne_pet] Huh? I did?

[Bloody_poet] What are you wearing?

Buffy blushed, suddenly realizing where he was going with this. But she wasn't against trying something new. Plus, she felt like her hormones had been doing the crazy dance of horniness lately... probably from being Spike-deprived. Maybe this would help.

[Anne_pet] Snow suit? Very ugly one too. Brown.

[Bloody_poet] L You're no fun, pet.

[Anne_pet] And you have a very depraved mind, Mr. Pervert. For your information, I'm... :::blushes:::

[Bloody_poet] You're what luv? You know you can tell me anything.

[Anne_pet] I'm a—cyber virgin.

[Bloody_poet] lol

[Anne_pet] (offended) Are you laughing at me?

[Bloody_poet] And so I repeat: What are you wearing?

[Anne_pet] I might be a cyber virgin, but even I know that's not very original.

[Bloody_poet] It's a classic. Come on, baby. I'd very much like to be your cyber first... and only. I'll be all gentle like, and I promise to make it good for you. So. What are you wearing?

[Anne_pet] Not much actually. Just took a bath. I have my baby blue satin robe on and nothing else. It barely covers my thighs. My hair is still wet and... I smell like vanilla and cinnamon.

There was a long pause before Spike answered and she was starting to worry that he might have lost the connection. Finally, she saw [Bloody_poet is typing] and she waited for his reply.

[Bloody_poet] You sure you've never done this before, you little minx? You nearly made me come in my pants. I wish I'd have some privacy. Suggestion to the warden: invest in some sound proof booths in computer room for cyber sex.

[Anne_pet] I'm sure the warden would have a hard time justifying that expense. Private booths so prisoners can play with themselves while on the internet. I don't see that going over well with everybody. But seriously... I don't want to torture you. Maybe we should stop...

[Bloody_poet] It's sweet torture, kitten. Plus, it'll give me something to fantasize about tonight.

[Anne_pet] Spike?

[Bloody_poet] Yeah Goldilocks?

[Anne_pet] I miss you.

[Bloody_poet] I miss you too. You have no idea how much I bloody miss you. Every second of the day.

[Anne_pet] Uh huh. What about the seconds of the night? You don't miss me then?

[Bloody_poet] Of course not, you silly bint... I spend every night with you. Every night, I hold you in my arms... In my dreams.

[Anne_pet] Good answer ;)

[Bloody_poet] The things I would do to you if I was with you right now, you have no idea.

[Anne_pet] Please—tell me.

[Bloody_poet] I'd walk into the room and seeing you there, sitting in your ratty old chair and looking so shaggable in nothing but your satin robe, I'd walk right up to you and...

[Anne_pet] You'd walk up to me and what?

[Bloody_poet] Thought you didn't want to play, pet?

[Anne_pet] Changed my mind. What would you do?

[Bloody_poet] I'd kneel in front of you... between your luscious thighs. I'd put my hands on your hips, over the warm satin of your robe, and slowly caress my way up your body all the way to your breasts. I'd spend some time enjoying the feel of the warm slippery fabric gliding under my fingers. Why don't you do it for me, pet? Tonight, your hands will be my hands.

Buffy crossed her arms in front of her, putting one hand on each side of her hips, and slowly trailed them upwards, pretending it was Spike touching her. She closed her eyes and shivered when she reached her breasts, cupping the soft mounds in her hands through the satin. Reaching the keyboard with one already shaking hand, she quickly typed.

[Anne_pet] Still wish it were your hands, but don't stop. Keep talking to me.

[Bloody_poet] Are you touching yourself, luv?

[Anne_pet] Yes.

[Bloody_poet] Good girl. Now, I'd play with your nipples until they'd form hard little peaks underneath the blue satin. I'd suck one into my mouth, wetting the fabric, then I'd blow on it to cool the wetness against your sensitive skin.

Buffy tweaked and pinched her own nipples until they were hard, letting out soft moans of pleasure that he couldn't hear. She was completely caught in the fantasy. She suddenly realized that Spike couldn't hear her and worried that he'd think she was bored and too nice to say it. For all he knew, she could have been filling her nails.

[Anne_pet] Huh... Spike? Am I supposed to write 'moan' or something? Cause I'm all with the moaning here. Just feels kinda weird that you don't know what you do to me. L

[Bloody_poet] Bloody hell, Buffy, you're so adorable and sexy. You drive me wild, woman. I love you.

[Anne_pet] MOAN :D

[Bloody_poet] lol

[Anne_pet] l love you too

[Bloody_poet] Put your hand between your legs... over the robe. That's what I would do if I were with you. I'd trail my fingers ever so lightly over your sex, rubbing your clit slowly with the satin and watching it get a darker shade of blue with your wetness. Are you doing it, luv?

[Anne_pet] God yes

[Bloody_poet] I'd push the robe apart to reveal your sweet little pussy to me and I'd lick it from bottom to top then give your hard little clit a quick suck. You taste so good. Are you wet, Buffy?

[Anne_pet] Always when I think of you baby

[Bloody_poet] And I get so painfully hard thinking of you, beautiful. I wish I could do something about it now. I'm going to have to wait until I'm in my cot, under the blanket, imagining your golden skin against mine, your naked body moving on top of mine... sitting on me with my cock buried inside your quim as deep as it can go.

Buffy almost came at his words. She typed with unsteady fingers.

[Anne_pet] Spike—I'm so close baby. Please.

[Bloody_poet] You're right; enough playing around. I love eating your pussy, but I'm too hard right now. Need to be inside of you. I get up and lift you up in my arms so I can take your place in the chair and have you straddling my thighs. I untie the sash of your robe and slide it along your arms until it rests at your elbows, the shiny blue fabric hanging loosely on either side of you. You're so beautiful, naked in my lap with your golden hair sprawled on your shoulders...

[Anne_pet] I unzip your pants and take your beautiful cock out. I love your cock. Did I ever tell you that? I love the way it fits so perfectly inside of me. How it stretches me and reaches so deep. I need it now. I stroke it a few times in my hand. God I love the way it feels. Your skin is so soft, baby.

[Bloody_poet] Love it when you take control like that luv. So sexy. You're by far the sexiest woman I've ever met. Put it in, kitten. I want to feel you around me—surrounding me.

[Anne_pet] I slide the head over my slit back and forth, getting it slick with my juices. I'm so wet for you, Spike. I rub it over my clit. Damn, I'm not gonna last long, honey. I'm already so close... feels like I'm gonna explode if I don't have you now. I position you at my opening and slam down on your cock, taking you all in. Fuck, you feel so amazing.

[Bloody_poet] That's it, kitten. Fuck yourself with your fingers. Come for me... for both of us.

Buffy didn't have to be told twice. She inserted another finger and pushed as deep as she could go, doing her best to pretend it was the man she loved inside of her even though three fingers were no nearly enough to match the way Spike filed her.

[Bloody_poet] Try to imagine it's me going wild beneath you, lifting my hips to meet you half way, our bodies slamming against one another so hard it almost hurt. It's my cock filling you up. Me. Tell me it's only me, kitten. I need to hear it.

[Anne_pet] Only you. Always. It's never been anybody else.

Her body was craving release. Her hips lifted off the chair rhythmically to meet the thrusts of her fingers, trying to take in as much as she possibly could. The orgasm washed over her with a suddenly that left her wide eyed and gasping for breath.

[Bloody_poet] You still with me, luv? Are you OK?

[Anne_pet] Better than OK :::blushes:::

[Bloody_poet] Should I conclude that you achieved 'little death' then?

[Anne_pet] Thanks to you and your magic words, I did. But I must say the death was more little than it would have been if you were with me.

[Bloody_poet] I bloody well hope so!

[Anne_pet] Don't worry. Nothing can compare to having you in the flesh. No amount of fantasizing, cyber sex, phone sex, sexy email, could replace you. You're irreplaceable, baby and you know it.

[Bloody_poet] Sorry to say that, but I have to leave, Goldilocks. My hour is over. And also, I'm risking a case of blue balls here if I don't do something about it soon.

[Anne_pet] I promise to kiss it better next time I see you.

[Bloody_poet] Promise?

[Anne_pet] Absolutely

[Bloody_poet] All right, then. Sweet dreams, kitten.

[Anne_pet] Good night, Spike. Love you

[Bloody_poet] Love you

[Bloody_poet is not currently signed in]

Buffy sighed and stood up on still wobbly legs. "Oh well. I guess that means it's time for my cold shower."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike sidestepped Andrew swiftly and hurried out of the computer room.

"Bye, Spike! See you tomorrow, right? Same Bat place, same Bat time?"

Spike couldn't help but stop and turn to throw Andrew an incredulous look. He shook his head in amazement at how strange that boy was, and finally left. The lights were flashing anyway, which meant it was time for all good prisoners to be tucked into their beds.

Under the instructions of the guards, the guys were now making their way to the holding cells area. Spike noticed Gunn walking ahead of him and hurried to catch up to his friend. Both their cells were in the same section so they started walking together, Gunn uncharacteristically silent.

"What's the matter with you? Bad mood, mate?"

"''m fine." The taller man grumbled, belying his words. "I mean, why would I be in a bad mood? My friend's been ditching me for a computer almost every night for a week. Really, I have every reason in the world to be happy. Everything's just fucking fine. What is it anyway? You having some kind of internet romance with one of those chicks who think it's just so 'Bonnie and Clyde' to date a prisoner?"

"Look, Charles, I know you're annoyed and all that rot, but I can't talk about it."

"Yeah. There's been an awful lot of shit you can't talk about lately. I thought I was your friend, man."

Spike stopped walking and grabbed Charles by the sleeve to force him to stop and face him. He placed his hand on the black guy's shoulder and looked him in the eyes. "You ARE my friend. You bloody well know that. And it's not just because we're stuck in here together and I have no other options but to be friends with you. You'd be my mate even if we were out there. But I wouldn't even be able to tell my confessor if I had one. You'd be the first person I'd be talking to if I could. Can you understand that?"

"Is it illegal?"

Spike sighed. "No. But it could hurt someone real bad if the word gets out. So please trust me and don't ask questions I can't answer, all right?"

"All right. Sorry dude. I've just had a bad day. I'll leave you and your little secret alone."

"And I'll try spending more time with you."

"Good."

They started walking again, but not for long. They had to stop again when they noticed three guys walking towards them, with their intents written plainly across their faces. Spike didn't have to look to the sides to know that there were other guys cutting off any possible escape path.

"Huh, Spike? I think we have a problem." Gunn said between clenched teeth.

"Oh you think?" Spike bit out sarcastically, eyes focused on the potential threat. "Thanks for pointing that out, mate, but I've noticed."

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