Part 7:

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Anya and Willow had spent the whole day together. They discussed Willow's dilemma, and her fears as she poured her heart out. Anya realized how much the two of them had in common and wondered why they were never good friends before. She figured that Xander played a part in keeping them from forming a tight bond. The jealousies that silently raged between them kept them distant. The talking was a good therapy and they resolved their differences in one day.

A few hours after sunset, they headed to the school to see if they could snag a particular blonde vampire at the start of his day. Willow laughed to herself as she thought about what a strange group of friends the three of them were. They were in luck as the two found him making his way out a back service door.

"Hey there, stranger."

"Oh, look, a couple of lovely birds come calling on lil' ol' me. What have I done to deserve such an honor?" The girls stood there for a while not saying a word, then both burst into a fit of giggles. Spike soon joined in.

"I was just on my way out to patrol a bit. Gonna come along, are you?"

"Well, I suppose we can tag along. Got extra weapons just in case?" Willow asked, knowing Spike was strong enough to protect them if they did come across any demons.

"Sure, pet."

"So, what new big bads are lurking these parts nowadays?" Spike and Anya weren't sure whether to let her in on the newest pest that was skinning "poor, defenseless" demons and leaving them hanging around. But---"Oh, what the hell---" Spike exclaimed and he filled her in on everything by the time they reached the cemetery. She faltered a bit with the mention of skin being ripped off but both Anya and Spike placed a comforting hand on each shoulder and reassured her. He continued his account of the unseen assailant.

**********

Xander pulled up at Buffy's to go on patrol with the slayer. They would have to take Dawn along. Buffy still felt uneasy leaving her sister alone in case Glory was actually back in town.

They had been at the cemetery for only a few minutes when Xander heard voices and looking up, he saw a sight that made him reel with anger. His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach.

"I'm going to kill him," he growled. Buffy had felt the familiar twinge at the same time Xander spoke and she looked in the direction he was talking to and noticed Anya and Spike walking together, seeming to be overly friendly with one another. Buffy felt a green tinge creeping up her cheeks and wondered why these feelings were coming over her.

Both groups stopped a good distance from one another. The air sizzled with an awkward silence. Xander broke it first.

"What are you doing here, Anya, and with dead boy?"

She answered matter-of-factly, "We're patrolling, if you really need to know."

"How convenient, the two of you together, to patrol?" Sarcasm dripped from Xander's voice.

She corrected, "No, the three of us." Willow stood there looking at her companions a bit confused. She slowly realized they must have run into her "other" friends.

"What the hell are you talking about, An?"

"The three of us?---Willow, Spike and I? Oh, I forgot, you can't see her. She's invisible to you as well as the three of you are to her. She believes you really don't want to see her and she's concerned you will all desert her."

Spike snorted, "Funny, why would she ever think anything like that of you, Harris?"

"I so much want to see you in a little pile of dust tonight. There's a nice breeze, wouldn't take long for you to be swept away." Xander was seething.

Spike took a step towards him, "Bring it on, Slayer's pet. If you can't be man enough to show up to your own wedding, I can just bet---"

Willow stood motionless, shaking her head. The way Spike was talking she knew instantly he was speaking to Xander. Finally, she stepped forward and interrupted the exchange. She looked over at Spike. Xander cocked his head and wondered why Spike had stopped his abusive rant.

Willow started out calm, "Enough. I don't want any more fighting between my friends. Friends are supposed to respect and trust one another. Stand by each other and love each other unconditionally." The other three could hear Willow's voice faintly and as she rambled on, a mist started to form where she was standing. They looked on in amazement as Willow took solid form and finished her speech. Spike raised his eyebrows and pointed around her. She slowly turned and was shocked to see Xander, Buffy and Dawn standing there in complete awe. Xander quickly walked to her and hugged his best friend tightly.

"Oh, Will---I am so happy to see you---now. I've missed having my Willow around."

"It's good to see you, too, Xand. So good." Buffy stood there with tears rolling down her face.

"Buffy, I've missed you so much. Forgive me for---" Buffy wouldn't allow her to finish as she rushed to her and threw her arms around her.

"All is forgiven, Willow---I love you, and I've missed you, too."

"Oh, good, Buffy?---Need to breathe a little but---this is nice."

"Sorry, Wills, it's just been---"

"I know.---Dawnie, hi. I've missed you as well. Seeing you gives me good memories of Tara. I'm sorry for everything, sweetie. I hope we can be good friends again."

Dawn walked over to her and wrapped an arm around Willow's waist. "I can see that happening soon. Good to have you back home."

The three best friends stood in a circle and caught up for a bit as Dawn slipped away behind them. Dawn and Spike's eyes met briefly as tears spilled over her face. She slapped Spike on the arm, he grabbed it and winced. "Oww". She threw her arms around his neck and held on for dear life.

"Don't you ever leave me---or Buffy---like that again, you understand? You broke a promise and I expect you to never break another one as long as I live."

Spike ran his hand over his bit's hair and whispered in her ear, "I promise, sweet bit. And I'm so very sorry I hurt you---and big sis. I'll try my best not to do that again."

"I love you, Spike. You're like my big, over-protective, pain in the butt brother. A little grrr and fangy sometimes, but I like having you around."

"I think I like this being needed thing----and I love you, too, Nibblet," he quietly added that last bit.

Buffy saw the exchange taking place and a wave of worry crashed over her. She still wasn't sure how to deal with Spike just yet, or whether to trust him completely.

"Dawn, do you mind going home with Willow while Xander and I finish patrolling?" She shook her head no and walked back over to stand next to her.

Willow asked, "We'll all get together later for some quality catch up time?" Buffy smiled. Dawn slipped her hand into Willow's and the two headed back to the Summers' home. Buffy and Xander continued on.

Spike asked, "Mind if we tag along?"

Xander, exasperated, replied, "Yes, we very much do."

"I wasn't asking you, whelp!"

Xander looked over to Anya. "Anya, you can go on home. I----."

"She doesn't take orders from you, you spineless wanker. She's an adult and not your concern anymore."

"Ok," Buffy interrupted once again. "That's it. I am so tired of all this male pride. Grow up, the both of you. Spike, it would be best if you just go."

Xander smiled evilly and Spike glared at him. "Bugger this." and in a huff, turned and walked away. Anya crossed her arms in front of her, shook her head sadly, and turned to follow Spike.

**********

Dawn was a non-stop chatterbox all the way back to the house. Willow actually enjoyed the incessant ramble because ever since they left the cemetery, she had an uneasy feeling creep over her. She felt they were either being watched or followed and she just wanted to get safely indoors.

Dawn unlocked the front door and they crossed over the threshold. Just as Dawn turned to say something and before Willow could shut the door, an ugly, evil demon stepped in behind them. With a wave of his hands, both girls were overcome with paralysis. He snarled and pointed at Dawn, who started to levitate. She felt helpless especially when the monster grabbed Willow by the arm and exited the house.

TBC

Part 8:

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Spike had decided to head over to see Dawn after Buffy had dismissed him. Right at that particular moment, he felt the anger rising up and he was trying his best to push it back down. Seeing Dawn would calm him down slightly and he really wanted to catch up with her. He had missed their time together over the past year. Anya called to him and he stopped and turned.

"Where are you going?" she breathlessly asked.

"Heading over to see the bit and Will," he turned and continued on.

She stepped in next to him. 'Boy he's walking fast', she thought. "Mind if I come with you? I mean anything better than going home to an empty house."

"I don't care," he mumbled. She could tell he was upset so she decided to keep quiet the rest of the way there which was a task all in itself .

Spike had an odd and peculiar sensation creep over him once they stepped onto Revello Dr. His suspicions were confirmed when he spied the front door of the Summers' home standing wide open. He suddenly bolted towards the house and bound up the porch steps, but halted at the door, hands spread out expecting a barrier there to keep him out. At that moment he spotted Dawn floating a few inches off the floor. He ran through the doorway and over to her, relieved that he was still trusted by them not to de-invite him. He called her name, thinking the worse. Her eyes fluttered open, fright evident in them. He pulled her to him, seeing she was unharmed, but not able to move.

"Can you speak? Are you alright?" He glanced over to check for any wounds and didn't see or smell any blood.

"Yes," she barely whispered.

He laid her across the couch and propped up her head. Kneeling beside her, he asked calmly, "Did you see who did this?"

"Yes---demon---short---ugly---red eyes---took---Willow---help her." Tears were sliding down her face.

Spike brushed her tears away. "I will, no worry, luv.---Anya, stay here with her, keep all the doors locked. Tell Buffy, when she returns, what happened. I'll check the woods by the cemetery." He looked over at Dawn. "I'll find her, bit, and bring her home." He grabbed a large sword out of Buffy's chest and headed out, slamming the door behind him.

**********

Willow was indeed frightened beyond imagination. Why her of all people? She wasn't a demon and Spike had specifically told her only demons were being found skinned. She had only been back for a day and now this demon was going to skin her alive? Perfect payback. Give and take. Her thoughts ran rampant. This thing had left her, wrists bound between two trees in the middle of the woods. She couldn't think straight, could not come up with a spell to get her out. She wondered if it was because of the fear, or being paralyzed, and how long she actually had before the demon made a return appearance. At that last thought, he reappeared right in front of her. She could hear him in her head; he was talking to her telepathically.

~Witch, you're still here. Not as strong as I suspected---or are you? When I watched you in your dreams, I could feel the power. You know you can't save them, not all of them. There is one greater who will prevail. You've failed them all before, you will do it again. This? This was all just a test. I'm not going to kill you---tonight.~

"Yeh, but I am," Spike, with his predatory skills, had managed to sneak up on the demon, catching him off guard. The demon tried to stop him, but his magic didn't work as Spike lifted the sword up and with an agile stroke, brought the blade across it's throat severing its head from its body. He stood there a while basking in his kill. He had saved the girl; at least that's what he kept telling himself. He ran over to Willow and untied her wrists. She slumped forward into his arms.

"Thanks." she said hoarsely.

"No problem, pet---a man, um---a vampire, could get used to this. Saving damsels in distress," he grinned.

"Yeah, damsel, right. How did you hear him talking to me?" She had quickly changed the subject so she wouldn't tarnish his pride right then.

"Don't know, I could hear everything he said in my head. Strange. Can you walk, now?" he asked.

"I think, just give me a sec, it's still wearing off.---How's Dawnie?"

He stood there holding her up. "I left her with Anya---she was scared but not hurt. What did the chap want with you?"

"Not sure---yet. I think he's the one that is either sending me my dreams or he's the shadow floating around me. Parts, I believe, have already happened. I don't know if I will still have them now that's he's gone." They had made it out to the edge of the graveyard grounds. Right at that moment, Buffy and Xander ran up to them, both sporting swords.

"Willow, are you ok? What happened?" Buffy was still in slayer mode, eyes darting around looking for something to give her reason to kill it.

"The bloke is back there," Spike motioned to behind them. "His head should be close to the body. That thing followed them home and took them by surprise. Zapped them with some kind of mojo, paralyzed them both. I think he may have been the demon skinner---not sure."

"Can we go home, please?" Willow asked groggily. "I need some sleep."

The four trudged back to Revello Drive to find two very relieved faces peering through the window. Spike had helped Willow all the way there, and neither Buffy or Xander tried to take over for him.

**********

Willow slept peacefully that night with no dreams to interfere her slumber. Buffy, on the other hand, was plagued once again with the same visions she had received a few nights earlier. Who were these hooded people? The girl running from them was yelling again, "Be ready, they're coming." Tonight, Buffy was treated to a bit extra. One of the hooded figures turned as if it were looking at her with only two beady red eyes staring out from under the hood. "You do not walk in your world." A man stepped in front of this figure, his back to her, and effortlessly decapitated it. His head turned to show his profile, but the voice was not exactly right. It was more upper class British, educated, almost sounded like her stuffy Watcher.

"Once you know who you really are, then you will know what you need to do." Buffy sat up in bed with a jolt.

'Why would Spike be in my visions and why was he talking like that? What does he have to do with this?' She needed some answers and needed them soon. "Hurry home, Giles."

**********

Two days later, Buffy finished up her work at the school, closed and locked her office door, and walked downstairs to the vampire's makeshift crypt in the basement. She wondered if she should barge into it like she normally would any other time, but visions of a naked Spike briefly flashed in her head and she didn't think she could keep herself from getting flustered if she even saw half a naked Spike. So, all debating aside, she softly rapped on the door. When no answer came, she opened it slightly and called his name. He didn't respond, and she wandered in thinking she would sit and wait a bit for his return. Sitting down on a few stacked crates, she heard a slight moan from the dark corner.

"Spike?" No answer. She found a lamp and switched it on, turning it to face the dark mass. It was him, hunched over, legs pulled up, arms wrapped around them and forehead resting on his knees. By the look of him, she thought he was sick or hung over. She silently walked over to him and knelt directly in front. She didn't want to touch him for fear of startling him.

Quietly she called his name. His head shot up, eyes wild, face streaked with dirt and traces of old tears. He looked lost at first, momentarily crazed and wild-eyed like he didn't know where he was or who she was.

"Are you alright?" Buffy was very concerned at this point.

In that instant he saw her and recognition came back to him. "Buffy---I--- ".

"What happened? You didn't show up last night, and Dawn was expecting you. She was very concerned."

"I'm not well, Buffy. I keep seeing things. Why are they tormenting me? Could this soul be doing all this? I never really did anything to them. Glory, Adam, Warren, the Master. Why are they haunting me?" He was rambling on now.

"Do they attack you?" She felt a need to help him.

"No, I think they are just figments of my really messed up imagination," he honestly replied.

"You look like you haven't slept. Have you been eating? ----And may I just ask, why is there a cross sitting here next to you?"

He looked down at it for a couple of seconds. "You mean this?" and he picked it up, hissing between his teeth as smoke rose up from his hand.

"Spike," Buffy yelled. She took it quickly from him. He stared at his hand for a moment, completely entranced. She looked at him sadly. "I don't know what---how do I help?"

"You will know what you need to do," he murmured. Buffy gasped, jumped up suddenly and screeched, "What?" making Spike jump and look up at her in shock.

"What, what?"

"You said something---something I just---you've said---how?"

"I don't remember what it was. It just came out. See, I told you I'm losing it."

Buffy looked at his burned hand. She was worried, worried to leave him all alone, but what could she do? Maybe they could help each other in some way.

"Hey, I think that maybe you should come home with me." Was she really saying this? Inviting him to her home? Was this a good idea? All these thoughts flitted about her head.

He shook his head. "No---no, I couldn't Buffy---I don't belong there. I'm worthless, not even worthy to be around you, let alone your sister and in your home. You shouldn't---"

"*Enough*", she said forcefully, then a bit quieter, "that's enough. You are *not* worthless. Besides, I have a full basement. You can stay there, you can help patrol and research, and we can work on this problem of yours together. Sound good?"

"I don't think---"

"Sounds good," she interrupted him. "Do you need to grab anything?"

"Buffy," he whispered.

"Ok, then let's get out of here." She held out her hand to him as he stared at it, and then diligently accepted it with his good hand.

TBC

Part 9:

Dawn, Buffy and Willow set up a temporary sleeping area in the Summers' basement that evening for Spike. Afterwards, Buffy dragged him along to the Magic Box to do some research. Just maybe some of Giles old books he had stored in the back could help her with some information about her Slayer visions she was dreaming. There might possibly be something about "soul having" vampires as well. Besides it would keep Spike focused on something else besides his delusional outbursts.

Buffy sighed when they walked into the shop. Xander was sitting and talking to Anya and looked up when they entered. He stood quickly. "Why is he here?"

"We're doing some research, Xander. Want to help?" Buffy was trying to get his attention on something other that the vampire standing next to her.

"Researching what?"

"I've been having my slayer dreams lately, and really want to find out what they mean. And---just maybe skim through some books and notes to find some information about vampires and souls."

"Nuh-uh---don't think so. Count me out. I can tell you right now why ol' Spikey went to get his soul. He's an Angel wannabe." Anya silently left the room as Buffy stood there looking at Xander, hands on her hips. Spike look pissed.

"Listen, mate, I'm sorry about everything in the past. But you gotta get over this holier than thou attitude."

"I am not, nor will I ever be your friend. *You* will always be an evil *thing* to me. I know what you did to Buffy. It's inexcusable and unforgiving. You may have her blinded by your charm and hoo-boy, now you got a shiny, new soul to boot. Are you keeping record of your conquests? How long it will take before you're allowed in her home, around Dawn by yourself, if she doesn't stake you first, or how long it will be before you sleep with her again? I can just about put money on it that this is all an act. Poor, pitiful Spike walking around looking hurt and broody. Been through it all before."

Spike was now clenching his hands into fists, not even feeling the pain from the burn. "So help me, I don't care how bloody much this is going to hurt me---", and he lunged at Xander with hands outstretched to wrap around his throat. Buffy was quick on her feet as she grabbed Spike and threw him to the ground. She wouldn't look at him as she hung her head.

"Just go." she mumbled.

With a feral growl, Spike pulled himself up and marched out, slamming the door in the wake.

**********

Spike burst through the front door of the Summer's house, frightening Willow and Dawn who were sitting on the couch watching a movie. Willow stood and wondered why her new friend was so distraught.

"Spike, what's wrong? You look like you're about ready to murder someone.--- You're not, are you?"

"No Red, unless Harris can be considered someone. Hurt, maybe. Why does he always mess my un-life up so much? Makes me want to throttle him if I didn't think it was not right. Can't I hurt him just a little bit?"

"No, no I'm sorry. Throttling is bad and we don't do bad anymore, right?"

"Then tell me, what does Buffy see in him that makes her believe everything he says about me is true? He doesn't know me. Sure I had a bit of rough and tumble with his ex, but I actually told him I was sorry. It was a mistake. Do you think he would buy my apology? Of course not. Then he starts rambling off to Buffy 100 reasons why Spike is an evil thing. Which got me so pissed and I almost let him have it." He looked down at his shoes. "Of course, Buffy got a bit cranky with me. Shooed me out the door like I was a bad dog. I can never do right by her. Never will be good in her eyes." He paused a bit. "At least I still have the two of you. I do, don't I?" His face conveyed the hurt and worry he was feeling at that moment. All he wanted was some kind of acceptance and to actually have some friends in this world.

Dawn looked at him and replied, "You know you do. Just give Buffy some time. I know my sister, she will come around. But I think you need to talk to her, explain some things to her. She's in the dark about a lot of things, Spike. I know she does care about you, I know she does."

He looked perplexed, "If she really does care----". Just then Buffy whirled through the front door, slamming it just as loudly as the first who entered. Willow's eyes got big and she grabbed Dawn by the arm.

"Buffy, uh, we were just going to bed. Goodnight." And they hastily made their way up the stairs.

Spike walked away from her, to stand closer to the kitchen in case he needed to make a quick getaway out the back door.

"Come to finish what Harris started, luv? You think he hasn't gotten the point across about how much you both hate me?"

"I don't hate you but you wanna know what I think?"

"No, luv, what *do* you think, do tell."

"I think you went to get this *soul* because you were thinking since I fell in love with a souled vampire once upon a time that I would do it all over again with you."

Spike stood there in front of her, arms crossed tightly in front of him, shook his head in disappointment. "Buffy," he softly started, "contrary to what you believe to be, I did *not* get a soul just to make you love me. Because I love you, I didn't want to hurt you, didn't want you to suffer because of me. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy and to live, but for you to have to put up with an "evil, soulless thing" wasn't easy for you I know. Granted, I will admit I wanted nothing more than for you to love me, but I knew I'd never be able to make you do something you didn't want." Spike turned and started to pace about the room.

"I was so torn that night, angry at myself for allowing things to go the way they did. I knew what I did was wrong, felt the guilt and pain rip through me. I was constantly struggling between what was right and wrong. I'm a vampire, not a man, but you have made me feel human again and I cringe at the thought that I allowed my demon to win over the humanity in me. So I went to get the soul because I needed to feel that humanity, more compassion, to have my conscience back. You deserve to be happy and I was making your life hell." He stopped pacing and turned to her, staring right at her, his eyes bright with unshed tears.

"Buffy, I could never apologize enough for what I did to you, but I *am* so very sorry. So very sorry," and he looked away from her. "If I could do anything to go back and change what happened, I would do it in a heartbeat." He glanced at her and in a softer voice, "I didn't know *what* I was doing. I wanted you so much, wanted your love so desperately, the pain was unbearable."

He started to pace again. "You know what I am, or what I was, but what I want to be is someone better, better for not only myself but for you. I am capable of distinguishing between good and evil." He stopped and again looked at her.

"I am *not* Angel nor will I ever be. I am not trying to take his place; you of all people should know that. But I want to be good, I truly do and I want to fight alongside you for that greater good. I want to be able to fit into your world, with your friends, your family. I can overcome this demon still inside and become stronger everyday. All I ask is for your help. *You* are the one that got me here whether you think so or not. *You* are the one I want to lead me down this path of righteousness and redemption. You are my light and I can't do it alone, not yet. I'm not asking---"

Buffy held up a hand. "Wait, don't say anymore. I understand now. Giles was right, and I had almost given up on you. I want to admit to you now that I have done wrong by you so many times and I am sorry. I had already forgiven you that night you ran off and left. I brought all that madness on just as much as you. I could have put a stop to it so many times. We started out as mortal enemies, then slaying partners in a sense. But I cherish the friendship we built the most when I came back to this world. I messed it up. It turned ugly when it could have been so wonderful." her voiced trailed off as she looked at her feet.

"If you are absolutely serious about wanting to change, I am willing to be a friend to the end and I will help you as much as I can allow. It will be a rough journey, you do realize this?"

He shook his head yes, the tears returning to his beautiful blue eyes. "I figured as much."

Buffy's eyes were beginning to tear up as well. All she ever wanted was to have that companionship back that they started out with, her slaying buddy, her equal. "And you will try to get along with Xander if I talk to him?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, luv, if I have to." He snickered and she joined in. "Buffy,---I do need to say this though, so bear with me just a bit?--- I do love you." She went to stop him from continuing. He shook his finger, "Ah, ah, ah, just give me a few.--- I do love you and I will always, that is real, but I will never push it on you ever again. I like the start of this friendship already. If I ever get out of line, just slap me about. I may have a soul, but the cockiness, I'm sorry to say, hasn't left. I've still got some "bad" left in these old bones. Can't help it, just the way I am sometimes."

Buffy smirked. "I can handle a bit of the big bad sometimes, but don't worry, if it gets away with you, I'll let you know---with a trusty punch to the nose."

"No, no not the nose, luv, please. It's seen to many wraths of Buffy. A punch in the arm would do much better, I should think." They both started laughing at this.

"Got it," she agreed. They stood there for a bit, smiling goofy grins at one another until she walked over to him and slid her arms around his lean waist for a long, friendly hug. "By the way, oh newly souled one, I missed you."

He wrapped his arms around her as well. Spike kissed the top of her head. "And I missed you, luv. Thank you."

Still sitting at the top of the stairs, Willow and Dawn were holding onto one another blubbering away. They were both very overwhelmed that it all had ended on a happy note. The future of this odd family was looking very good indeed. They made their way down the stairs both wanting to join in the "moment". Dawn threw her arms around the both of them and the couple embraced her as well. Willow waited a moment and then joined in the fray of bodies. Spike and Buffy both started laughing deeply, a sound that neither had ever heard from the other. The two girls joined in and happy tears were shed in the huddle. Everything was going to be good from now on. At least, they hoped.

TBC

Part 10:

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Everyone standing in the group hug was now doing a combination of laughing and crying. All four had failed to hear the continuous rapping on the front door.

"Excuse me for interrupting the, um, celebration?" A very familiar voice called.

Buffy's head snapped up at the sound of that voice, her eyes wide, mouth open even wider.

"Giles," she screamed and ran to him with arms wide. Giles at first grinned as he placed his bag on the floor next to him. When it hit him just how excited Buffy actually was to see him, the grin melted.

He leaned back a bit and quickly said, "Slayer strength, the slayer strength."

Buffy stopped abruptly in front of him and he relaxed. They both smiled at one another before wrapping their arms around each other. He pulled away and held her face in his hands, looking at her. She looked genuinely happy. When he had left this last time, he was once again concerned she would fall back into a life of depression.

"It's so good to see you so happy." He wondered what had made her glow so much, then remembered the commotion going on when he had to let himself in. Still smiling, he looked up at the small crowd standing in the middle of the living room. His eyes fell upon the one thing he was really sure he didn't want to see in Buffy's presence. His face fell.

"Spike", he said blandly.

Buffy noticed this. "Giles, we weren't expecting you til tomorrow."

He looked back at her. "Caught an earlier flight."

Buffy looked back over at her friends who at that very moment seemed tense. "Giles, Spike is staying here---" Giles looked at Buffy sternly. "in the basement."

Giles tone berated, "Buffy."

She piped in quickly, "Temporarily."

Spike wiped his shirt sleeve across his face, getting rid of any evidence showing that he had been crying. Mind you, they were tears of happiness, but still made him feel like a pouf. He stepped towards the watcher who was looking at him.

"Watcher---Giles. Buffy is putting me up until I can find suitable living quarters elsewhere. I think she wants to baby-sit me. Make sure I don't stake myself." He smirked and looked at Buffy who smiled back while lowering her eyes.

Spike started for Giles bag. "Here, let me show you where you'll be staying," he said as he picked up the suitcase and headed for the stairs. Buffy and Giles exchanged a look of surprise between each other. Giles turned and followed him.

Spike had stopped at the top of the stairs. "You'll be staying in Joyce's room. Will and Dawn share a room." Then he quietly added, "Between you and me, I think Red doesn't want to be alone at night especially in Joyce's old room."

Both walked through the doorway and Giles discreetly closed the door. Spike took notice and shut his eyes momentarily knowing the impending lecture was about to begin. He could already tell the Watcher was standing there cleaning his glasses.

"Spike," he started.

Spike spun around. He really wasn't in the mood to be scolded by Giles. "Look, I know I have done some really bad things in the past, but I know what I am and what I'm capable of. You at one time believed I was redeemable, you said so at my crypt right after the chip was put in. Remember what you----".

"Spike," Giles held up his hand to stop Spike's continuing ramble. "I'm not going to chastise you. Though I'm astounded you took notice of my speech back then. Granted, I am a bit concerned about Buffy's and Dawn's and yes even Willow's welfare. It's not any of my business, but are you and Buffy-- -".

Spike tilted his head, wondering where the man was going with this.

Giles just stared at him for a few seconds realizing that Spike wasn't understanding his question. "---involved?"

Spike straightened as a look of understanding swept over his face and he took a quick gasp of air. "Ohhh----no, nothing like that. Partners---in the sense of she helps me, I help her. Good friends."

"You still have feelings for her?" There was a brief pause.

"I will always have feelings for her. She's mostly to blame for me turning out this way. She took me seriously, I guess, when Red had our memories erased. I told her I was a noble vampire here to help the helpless." He chuckled, remembering what he had said to Buffy when she reminded him he was a vampire.

Giles was still serious looking. "Are you prepared to do battle within yourself?"

"Prepared?" he scoffed. "Why do you bloody think I'm staying here? Because I can't protect myself from me. Not yet---but I will be---I swear to it."

Giles remained in the same spot looking at him.

"Don't worry watcher, I will never harm them, not ever again." His voice trailed off as he looked around the room then turned his attention back to Giles. "So is this the end of our father-son talk?" He gave him his usual smirk.

Giles smiled slightly at Spike. "Almost.---If you ever---", Spike thought he knew of the coming threat. "---and I mean, ever, have any questions or feel out of sorts, don't feel too big and bad to come to me. Any problem, whatever the case may be, I would like to be of help. Anything that I can possibly do to aid you in your absolution."

Spike's jaw dropped to the floor as he processed the information in his head. "Are you serious? And I always thought you a bleeding git for all the times you made me out as the "evil, soulless thing". Go figure. A slayer and a watcher looking out for a souled vampire's best interest.--- Thanks--- dad." He finished with a glint in his eyes.

Giles chuckled. He placed a hand on Spikes shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze. "Anytime---son."

**********

Buffy paced nervously around the kitchen, opening and closing the cabinet doors. Dawn and Willow sat at the island watching her. Dawn couldn't take it any longer.

"Buffy, please, sit down or find what you are looking for."

She turned to her sister. "I wonder what is taking them so long upstairs. You don't think Giles has dusted Spike, do you?"

Willow snickered. "You act like you've been caught by dear old dad making out with your boyfriend on the living room couch. Which I know you haven't been doing--lately." She looked over at Dawn who just looked at her and grinned. "Buffy, he's just probably asking Spike some questions. I'm sure it's alright. Really."

"You're right. I'm an adult now. I can live with anybody that I choose to live with. Oh, I didn't mean it like that, he's not living with me, he's just living under my roof, in my basement, until he's better."

"Buffy you're rambling. He's here because he's our friend and he needs a place to stay. Where we can look out for him and help him." Dawn was so calm and grown-up.

Buffy took a deep breath and released it, finally settling down next to her sister. When they heard the voices approaching, she jumped up out of the chair again and started wringing her hands, watching the kitchen doorway.

Willow laughed and shook her head. "At least you know they're both still alive."

Giles and Spike walked into the kitchen looking as if none of the tension existed between them anymore. Buffy felt relief that instant. Both men noticed the silent stares directed at them. Giles spoke up first.

"Buffy, I am very proud of you. You have overcome so many obstacles and you have learned the fine art of forgiveness. You are truly becoming the person, the adult, I always wished you to be."

"I had a wonderful teacher---and father-figure."

Giles cleared his throat. "Yes---of course. Well if you don't mind I think I'm going to head to bed. Long flights tend to make me a tad groggy. Mind if I come to the school with you tomorrow and look around? Then I can spend the rest of the day with Willow and Spike, catch up on the lot of you."

Buffy smiled. "I would like that. Goodnight, if you need anything just call."

"Will do. Goodnight all."

Buffy turned to Dawn. Dawn rolled her eyes and scooted off the stool. "I know, I know. I'm going to bed, too." She kissed her sister on the cheek and hugged Willow but before she made it through the doorway, she turned and walked up to Spike who was standing at the microwave waiting for his snack to warm up.

"I'm happy you're back and staying with us." She hugged him, taking him by surprise as he hugged her back.

"Goodnight sweet bit. Have pleasant dreams."

The remaining three sat at the island and talked a while longer knowing that the next few days were going to be filled with loads of research. Buffy wanted to find answers to her dreams before something really bad happened.

Deep down, Spike felt a growing concern about whether he could actually shun his demon and leave all of the evil behind. He knew it was going to be a bumpy ride but he now had acceptance from the people he cared about, and they were willing to help him through the torment.

TBC

Part 11:

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Buffy and Dawn came home the next day, both dragging their tired and weary bodies through the front door. Giles, Willow and Spike were in the dining room, books and notebooks spread all over the table.

"Hello, honey, we're home," she droned out. Dawn giggled at her as she made her way up the stairs and into her room to drop off her school bag. She soon bounded back down with renewed energy.

"Geesh, is their some magical potion up there that I need to get a swig of? Where did all this bounciness come from? Just a minute ago you were dead on your feet."

Spike came from the other room and heard the remark. "Hey, I resemble that."

Dawn shrugged her shoulders, laughing at Spike's lame joke. "I'm home; not at school."

Buffy rolled her eyes at both of them. "Funny. What have you all been doing today? And where is my dining room table?" She peered around the doorway to see the structured mess lying there.

"We're either trying our hand at redecorating, that or we've set up the new Sunnydale library in the middle of your dining room. What do you think we've been doing all day? There's enough research material in there to fill enough libraries in the whole state."

"Yeah, sounds like fun was had by everyone."

"If you say. I've had more fun having a root canal," he comically stated.

She laughed at him. "You've never had a root canal."

"No, but I've heard about them. Harmony was always the incessant storyteller. Everything about anything, til my ears bled or I was ready to shove a stake through my own bleeding heart. A horror story, that one is. Harmony, not the root canal."

"Believe me, I remember."

Giles walked into the living room carrying a few sheets of paper.

"Hello, Buffy. Tough day?"

Spike suddenly realized how tired Buffy looked. He felt he should have noticed sooner and said something to her or offered to get her something. He mentally kicked himself. 'Keen on the observedness there, Spike, you ponce.' He admonished himself privately.

Buffy plopped herself down in the comfy chair and threw her head back with a sigh.

"Seems to be a lot of troubled teens at Sunnydale High these days. Just have to learn how to better prepare myself to get through it day after day without sending anyone off the deep end."

"I'm sure you're doing just fine." Giles gave her a comforting squeeze as he walked back into the dining room. "Join us when you're ready to."

Spike stood there a while watching her doze.

"Spike." He jumped a little when she spoke.

"Can I get you anything, Buffy? Something to drink, or eat."

Buffy opened her eyes and raised her head slowly, tilting it slightly to look at him. "Ok, don't start going all weird on me. But thanks anyway. I think I will head up and change into something a little less business like. Go on back to your ever-so-fun research and I will join you all soon."

He smiled slightly before turning back to the task at hand.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Later that evening, Buffy was in the kitchen preparing things for the next day. Everyone else had called it an early night. Even Spike, who was actually falling asleep at the table with his head resting on the book he was looking through. The house was so peaceful and quiet as she sat at the island sipping her chammomile tea. Without warning, a deathly scream pierced the silence. She bolted down the basement stairs hitting the light switch on the way down.

She stood there frozen, not knowing what to do or say. What was happening to him? Spike crouched in the corner of the room, eyes wide with fear, and panting heavily. A glint caught her eye and at first she thought he still had the cross with him. As she walked closer she saw the blood on his hands and chest. Fresh cuts were visible now and she saw that he was clutching a butcher knife in his hand.

She spoke his name calmly, hoping to snap him out of this state. She didn't wan't to get too close and have him lunge at her, mistaking her for someone or something else. She lowered herself to her knees to make eye contact and talked to him.

"Spike, Spike look at me. I need you to focus and look at me. That's it. Look into my eyes, just like that. Good. Remember me? Your friend, Buffy?" Recognition hit him hard. Tears poured out of him and the sobs were devastating for Buffy to hear.

Buffy moved in closer holding her hand out for the knife. She didn't even have to ask for it. He gave it to her freely and she tossed it behind her away out of his reach.

"You want to tell me something? I'm all ears."

He shamefully covered his face with his hands and his tears made the blood run down his arms in jagged rivulets. Buffy grabbed a towel out of a basket nearby and closed the space in between them. She gently took one hand and started wiping it, then did the same to the other.

"Talk to me, please," she pleaded with him while cleaning him up.

He noticed what she was doing and the crying slowly stopped.

"I want it out of me."

She looked at him, puzzled. "The soul?"

He shook his head no. "It's telling me what I should be doing, vexing me, torturing me." His voice was cracking with pain.

"I've hurt too many innocents, killed for blood. Want it to stop. Too many bad dreams. I want the demon out. It tried to hurt you. Cut it out, try to cut it out. So painful. Buffy please help me. Take it out."

He ended up in her arms, the two of them rocking back and forth. She didn't know what to say to him to comfort him. She thought maybe she should call Angel to discuss the situation. Would Spike be angry at her if she took the matter into her own hands? Buffy decided she would talk to Giles in the morning. But what was she going to do with Spike in the meantime? She couldn't just very well leave him down in this basement in his state and she wasn't really in the mood to sleep in the dank and musty place either. She grabbed the blanket and pillows off the cot and stood up pulling him with her.

"Come on." He looked at her not knowing what she was getting ready to do.

"You're sleeping in my room tonight---on the floor, mind you. First let's go clean you up in the bathroom."

He pulled back a little flustered. "No, not ready to go in there just yet. Kitchen sink will do."

She looked at him for a second then slowly shook her head up and down. She understood it was still too much for him to go into that room. It meant he would have to once again acknowledge what he, or the demon in him, tried to do so many months ago. 'Baby steps,' she thought.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Buffy slowly opened her eyes and blinked a few times to focus them. It was light in her room which meant the sun was waking up as well. Nothing had roused her out of her deep slumber. No dreams, no alarm clock, no sounds what-so-ever. She turned her head to see what time it actually was. Clock read 6:10. Another 20 minutes and it would be buzzing at her.

She sensed something very familiar, a slight tingling sensation in her lower belly. Then she heard it. A soft moan and was that breathing? Maybe it was a human habit hard to let go of. A slight smile crept across her face and she rolled to her side to stare at this creature sleeping soundly across her bedroom floor.

She wasn't sure how long she laid there and gazed at him. His curly platinum blonde hair, all messed up, the way she really liked it. Seemed so much more natural even if it was bleached. The hollows under his cheeks made by the sharp angles. She couldn't help to think how angelic he looked laying there as the first of the morning light filtered through the drawn curtains. His chest was bare and she faltered, noticing the bandaged wounds from the previous nights fit of self-mutilation. She felt a twinge of sadness for him, not pity, but a feeling that she really wanted to give him something to help with all the pain and guilt.

"Buffy, are you going to stare at me all morning, luv?" He had turned his head and looked in her direction, his eyes twinkling.

She gasped and raised her head a bit off her pillow. She reached behind her and flung a throw pillow at him, hitting him squarely in the nose.

"Bullseye," she giggled and swung her legs over to sit on the edge of her bed.

He yanked the pillow away ferociously and growled. "The nose, the bloody nose. You are gonna wish you had never done that."

He reached for his pillow and swiftly stood up, braced in a fighting stance, clutching a pillow in each hand. Buffy's eyes widened. 'Uh-oh', she thought as she stood, gripping her pillow over her head.

He puffed up and snarled, "I'm still the 'Big Bad', you know."

"What, the 'Big Bad' pillow fighter? Ooh, I'm shaking in my, well I'm not wearing any shoes, but if I were---."

"You asked for it, little girl."

She scoffed at him for calling her a little girl. He charged her, pillows swinging. They pelted one another with soft blows, both laughing like they never had before, until he retaliated by pulling out his bag of dirty tricks. He swung his arm low and behind her, hitting her at the back of her knees, knocking her on her back and across the bed. She scrambled around to reach for her lost weapon as he grabbed her around the waist to hold her at bay.

Flashes of his attack on her raced through his head and he released her, rolling onto his back next to her, breathing raggidly. She, on the other hand, was giggling uncontrollably by now. It took her a moment to realize he had quit playing. She pulled herself up in a sitting position, hugging her pillow to her chest, still chuckling. Spike was staring at the ceiling, running his hand over the bandages on his chest, a pained shadow on his face.

It dawned on her why he had stopped so suddenly. "You ok?"

"Yeah. You?"

"Then look at me." He turned his head and gazed at her with a deep sadness in his eyes.

"I'm great. That was fun. Come on, sit up and let me check your wounds."

He sat up and turned slightly towards her on the edge of the bed. She proceeded to take one of the bandages off. His body stiffened under her touch and he grabbed her wrist gently.

"You know, on second thought, I can check them. I'm sure you have better things to do than to play nursemaid to me. I may be a raving lunatic, but I am still physically able."

"I'm sure you are," she mumbled more to herself as she lifted herself off the bed and towards her closet. Of course he heard her and she knew that he did. She turned her head and gave him a sly smile, trying to lighten the mood.

"I'll see you this afternoon then." She grabbed some clothes and headed out the door. He watched her go then fell over onto the bed like a lovesick teenager. He was turning into a bloody pouf and he knew it.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

TBC

Part 13:

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

This is the way it should be, Spike thought as the two of them casually strolled through Restfield cemetery. Out patrolling for demons with your best mate, or best girl as he longed for even more. It had been another uneventful patrol, just a few vamps here and there.

"This is getting just way too creepy. Doesn't seem the little demons want to come out and play anymore."

"Buffy, if you wanted little demons---." Spike sounded funny and she looked over at him, curious. He had stopped a few paces back and seemed to be staring wide-eyed at something in front of them. She looked in the direction he was gawking at and her mouth dropped. A creature like neither one had seen before, was slowly lumbering in their general direction. "--- then I suggest you need to put in your requests a little sooner."

The demon stood around 7 ft. tall, had a long tail with razor-sharp spikes running down it. The feet had sharp claws on it as well but its arms were teeny tiny. Actually, it looked like 3 or 4 different species of dinosaurs were thrown into one pot and this is what came out.

"Any suggestions, luv, and quick?" Spike continued to stare at the creature.

"How do you kill a thing like that?" Ideas rolled through Buffy's mind.

"No idea. But as soon as possible."

"Great, thought I could go home, put my feet up, have a nice relaxing evening in front of the tv. But no, now I have to deal with Mr. Jurassic Park here." Buffy moaned.

"Huh?" Spike chanced a look at the Slayer.

"A book, made into a movie, about dinosaurs."

"I know what Jurassic means. Guess that book was never on my best reads list and I sure as hell wouldn't watch a movie about creatures older than me. Let's just hope Puff here doesn't spit out fire." Spike dropped into a fighting stance.

"I guess it's time to find out. I'll take the front you bring up the rear. And be careful. Those look like wicked spikes---Spike." She snickered under her breath.

"Bloody teriffic, I'm stuck out here with a comedienne. You slay me--- Slayer," he smirked. "Be careful, too."

The demon roared at them as it approached. It was ticked off at something or it could even be mad that they were standing in its path of destruction. Spike grabbed a sword from Buffy's bag of goodies as she grabbed a battle axe. They would have to be quick and agile to stay away from all the sharp protruding extremeties. It's first swing at Buffy was slow and clumsy. They would just have to outwit it somehow and go in for the kill.

Buffy got in a few swings, but its hide was tough and hard to penetrate. Spike had been knocked down a few times by its wicked tail, nothing he couldn't bounce back from. He thought he finally found a soft spot and jumped onto it's back. It looked like they might be bringing the demon down, when it suddenly sprouted an extra pair of super long, powerful arms from each side. Both arms ended with 4 very sharp daggers. Buffy never knew what hit her as one of the sharp implements slashed across her belly. Spike slid his sword into the spot he had eyed earlier all the while feeling a slight pain in his gut. With a groan from them both, the beast toppled over, dead as a door nail. Spike had rolled off of it as it plummeted to the ground hard.

Spike was doubled over as he stared at the fallen demon. "Well, well, what do you know? It *was* killable. Buffy? Oh, god, no."

Spike ran over to a crumpled up Buffy. A wave of nausea rose up to his throat and flashes of the last time she died hit him hard. He fell to his knees next to her and cradled her head. The tears started without warning.

"Buffy, luv, how we doing? Talk to me." he whispered in her ear.

"Spike", she moaned. "I guess I should have parried when I thrust. It hurts. Is it bad?"

"I've seen uglier, gaping, oozing wounds, pet. I'm going to carry you home. Hold on tight. Buffy don't leave me, you understand?"

"Understood. Just hurry." She drifted off into a somewhat unconcious state.

The house was dark when they arrived. Thinking Giles must have taken the girls out somewhere, Spike ended up kicking the door in. "Sorry about the door, luv, I'll fix it tomorrow."

He laid Buffy on the living room couch and made sure she was still awake, which she was. She looked at him and saw how scared he was. "Towels in the linen closet, first aid kit under sink in the bathroom," she whispered.

He bounded up the stairs two at a time and rounded the corner. He suddenly froze at the bathroom doorway as if he hit an invisible barrier that was keeping him from entering even though he knew what it really was. He growled at himself. "Get over it, get over it, get over it. It's all in the past, move on. I'm bigger, better and stronger than you and I *will* come out on top."

He ran into the bathroom and grabbed what he needed. As he flew down the stairs again, the trio came in the front door.

"I need help," he hoarsely told them. Dawn went hysterical suddenly and he made her get a basin of water from the kitchen to keep her busy. Willow ran up to get some blankets and Giles stayed to help Spike clean and dress the wounds.

An hour later all five occupants were completely knocked out, laying around the living room. Buffy sat up and looked at them. She smiled knowing they again beat the bad guy and cheated death once more. Spike heard her stirring and looked up from where he was seated. He noticed how much better she looked as he stood quickly and walked over to her. When he reached the edge of the couch his knees gave way and he kneeled there beside her.

"Buffy, you doing ok, luv?" he whispered as he reached to touch her.

"Yeah, much better. Thanks for the rescue and the doctoring."

"Anytime, just not very soon and not very often, alright?"

"Gothcha."

"Buffy, I did it. I beat it." His eyes were shining.

"I know you did. I saw it lying there on the ground."

"No, not *that* demon. *My* demon. I fought it and won. I think everything is going to be alright now. Thank you for making me see what I can be. I know I have a long way to go but I'm on the right path now."

He wrapped his arms around her waist gently and laid his head on her shoulder. She returned the hug. "Baby steps," she whispered into his ear.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

It was early Friday evening and Dawn was excited about putting together a Scooby night. Everyone was going to be there, including Anya and Xander. Spike and Xander had already been reprimanded ahead of time and both warned by the Summers sisters to keep their comments to themselves. Spike agreed with a slight growl, Xander reluctantly agreed. It would be hard enough to be in the same room with him let alone not be able to throw snide remarks towards him.

Spike had reservations about even being there at all. For some reason, he still didnít feel like he belonged in the gang even though Dawn had announced to everyone he was an official member. No one complained, except of course Xander. Spike wandered into the kitchen to find Dawn preparing snacks for later. She turned to see concern evident on his face. She pulled a Buffy on him, arms crossed over her chest, hip tilted out to one side, and head cocked.

"Whatís wrong?" she asked him.

"I donít think, sweet bit, that I should even be here tonight. Donít want your little festivity ruined by anything un-festive. The whelp and I donít mix too well."

She resumed her work. "Donít be silly. Whether you know it or not, you are a part of the team. I mean, I know there wasnít an official newsletter about it, but you are and everyone is satisfied with it."

"Yeah, I bet everyone is."

Dawn squinted at him. "Are you scared of Xander?"

Spike sputtered. "What!!? Scared of the whelp? Never---how dare you even insinuate that."

She smiled. "Then youíll be here. No arguing about it ëcause Iíll win anyway."

He shook his head, disgusted at himself. "Yeah, tell me about it. Definitely a ìBitty Buffyî. Fine, Iíll stay, just for you, nibblet."

She walked past him and gave him a peck on the cheek. He grinned at her.

**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Everyone did show up as promised. An hour later, things were still civil. Spike stayed as far away from Xander as he could and Buffy noticed this, thinking that it was nice to see him at least trying to stay out of trouble. The soul, she knew, was working with him to be good.

They ate supper and discussed life in general. Before movie time, they were going to go out and patrol for old times sake. Both Anya and Willow didnít seem too thrilled about the prospect of slaying vamps and demons, but they decided to tag along.

The gang wandered through two cemeteries without exerting too much. Buffy, Spike and occasionally Dawn did most of the dustings. Upon the arrival of the third cemetery, Buffy decided once through, they would head back for movies and munchies. Of course, that was enough to jinx everything. In the middle of the graveyard, a group of vampires stood around looking like they were up to no good. Buffy and Spike were excited to get some slaying in. The others moaned in protest. She made sure everyone had a weapon and then headed towards the crowd, Spike and Dawn on either side of her.

Most of the vampires chickened out and ran away when they noticed who was marching towards them. Half of them stood their ground, ready to fight. The battle was swift and clean, as clean as you can get with vampire dust floating around everywhere. Giles was very impressed at the teamwork they had established. He was especially impressed at how well Buffy and Spike fought together. Seemed they always knew where the other was, knew what moves were coming up, and both flowed around the other like liquid. He was definitely impressed.

Giles surveyed his team. Anya and Willow were standing next to each other, talking. Buffy was dusting vampire remains off of Dawnís back as Spike packed up the weapons. Xander was standing near a very large mausoleum when it hit. A slight tremble of the earth at first, then things started to shift dramatically. A concrete slab, one side of the crypt, broke away and teetered on edge toppling outward. Spike noticed it happening and with no reservations and at lightning speed, he sprinted and tackled Xander, sending them both flying. Xander hit the ground, shoulder first, dislodging it from the socket. He yelped in pain. Spike grabbed his head as shocks throbbed at his temples.

"Bloody hell," he growled.

TBC