Summary:            

Buffy meets a boy from the wrong side of the tracks and ends up pregnant. She is sent to sunnydale where she keeps the fact that the baby is hers a secret. In sunnydale she meets Spike who comes to love the child without knowing that the baby is Buffy’s. What will happen when the baby’s father shows up. Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters belong to Joss Whedon and ME. Although if they want to give me James Marsters I won’t complain.

A/N: Thank you to my betas darlawinifred and kiera. And please review because this is my first story

         Child of Mine?

Chapter 1 - My life begins with or without you.

The club was buzzing with excitement as the young blonde walked
through the door. She was very pretty, her hair flowed down past her
shoulders in blonde waves, and her green eyes sparkled like emeralds.
She wore a pair of black leather trousers and a midnight blue halter-
top. She looked fantastic as always. All around her people were
dancing to the loud music. The band was one of her favourites. This
was one of LA’s loudest and most popular nightclubs. She looked
around, but didn’t see anyone that she knew or she wanted to know for that fact. She decided to sit down at a table waiting for her friends
or waiting to see if someone offered to dance. She had just ordered
her drink not old enough to buy alcohol she ordered a diet coke.  The
music changed and her favourite song started playing, not waiting for
a dance offer she got up to dance, not caring if she was on her own
or not. She started to sway her body to the beat of music and was
soon caught up in the middle of a group of people having a great
time. Near the end of the song, she heard someone call out to her
“Hey B, what are you doin’ here? I don’t think daddy dearest will be
happy if he finds out where you are,” The new arrival said.
Buffy smiled.
“Hey Faith” Buffy replied, “well you know me. They say father knows
best but I never was one to do listen to my father. ”
“Yeah, you got the whole rebel thing goin’ on don’t you”
Faith said walking up to the blonde.

Buffy Summers is 17 years old and everything she does is the complete opposite of what her father would want her to do. As one of the most prominent lawyers at the biggest law firm in Los Angeles, Hank Summers expected his only daughter to be friends with the other rich kids and always do what made him look good. After all, he had his reputation to uphold. It was simply because of this fact that Buffy never did these things. Instead, she was friends with all the people her father deemed inappropriate, and went to clubs and did anything else that she knew her father would hate. Going against the grain made her life feel more exciting then listening to daddy's rules. Buffy and Faith sat back down.  Buffy’s drink arrived, and the girls started talking.
“So B, does your father even know that you’re out tonight?”
“Of Course” Buffy replied, “He just doesn’t know the real location.
He thinks I’m at a sleepover at Cordy’s, as if,” She laughed. "Like I
would spend one moment with that bimbo."
“I honestly don’t know how you get away with these things B.” The
brunette smiled
“Well my dad knows I never do what he says, but I guess he’s just
stupid about some things. I think he just pretends not to care anymore, it’s starting to turn his hair gray.”
“You can say that again, I mean-“
Faith was interrupted by a male voice.
“Hello ladies”
Both girls looked up into deep brown eyes and replied in unison
“Hey”
“So” the stranger said, “I was wondering if I could have a dance with
you.” This request was directed at Buffy yet it was more demanding
than questioning. She flashed him a smile and promptly answered,
“Well, that depends because you haven’t even told me your name yet.”
She was trying to play hard to get.
“Ok” he smiled at her “In that case its Angel. My name is Angel.”
“Well Angel, my name’s Buffy and I would love to dance with you” Shesmiled and stood up.And with that, he led her onto the dance floor, and a ballad startedto play. He pulled her close as they swayed together to the melody. Buffy could not stop thinking about how handsome Angel was. He had dark hair and beautiful brown eyes, any girl would love her guy to have Angel’s looks and she had decided that she was going to make him hers.

The three young teens spent the rest of the night talking and getting
to know one another. Buffy learnt that Angel was 19 years old and
didn’t go to college. He went from job to job, currently working as
an apprentice mechanic in the bad part of LA. He was definitely the
kind of guy she couldn't bring home to daddy. This only helped her
make the decision that she was going to have him, but that wasn’t too
important. She was falling for him. Falling for his looks and that
smile.

At the end of the night, he walked the two girls to Faith’s car.
Since Buffy had decided to spend the night at her friend’s house, she
had to stay somewhere. When they arrived at the car, he gave her a
kiss on the cheek and handed her a piece of paper, which she noticed
contained his phone number. He started to walk away then looked over his shoulder. "Call me."
As he continued to walk away, she mumbled to herself.

“You can count on it.”
She didn’t realize that this was the start of something big,
something that would change her life. For the better or for the worse.

A/N: Thank you to my beta darlawinifred. And to everyone who has reviewed so far. I t means loads.

Chapter 3: Happiness Changes Everything

“Hey baby.” Buffy said as she rolled over to look at Angel, who was lying in the bed beside her.

As she looked at him, she thought of everything that had happened between them. It had been a month since their first night together. She remembered that night vividly. Every touch, every kiss. She remembered how gentle he had been with her. It had been her first time so she was obviously nervous, but everything that scared her melted away when he kissed her. Everything had changed that night, she just wasn’t sure how yet. She was knocked out of her reverie by the sound of Angel’s voice

“Hey you . Sleep well?”
“Yeah.” she replied sleepily “slept really well.”

“That’s good. So what are we gonna do today?”

She felt nervous as he asked her this but she didn’t have any choice
but to tell him

“Um, well, I don’t know what you’re doing but I have to do something this afternoon.” She was trying her best not to give a straight answer but he wasn’t buying it. She really didn't want to tell him.
“Oh, well where are you going?” He didn’t really care. Truth be told
he’d like to have time away from her. Go out see his friend, that kind of thing.
“Well I have a doctor’s appointment.”
Angel was surprised by this and felt compelled to ask
“Why are you going to the doctor?”
“Nothing big. Probably just a routine thing.”
“Ok” he sighed.

He felt a wave of relief wash over him at her words, it didn’t seem like there was anything going on. However, Buffy knew there was more to the appointment. She just didn’t want to tell him yet. ‘Oh God, what am I going to do? If the doctor says what I think he will, I don’t know what will happen’ Buffy’s mind was shouting at her. She couldn’t relax anymore so she got out of bed and headed for the bathroom to take a shower. When she emerged twenty minutes later Angel was dressed and getting ready to leave the apartment.
“Going somewhere?” she asked him.
“Well I figured since I wasn’t going to see you this afternoon, that I’d meet up with some of the boys. So we should go.”
“Oh, ok” She felt quite dejected by this but decided to let it go.

She continued
“I guess I’ll see you this evening then. Say around six. Wish me luck.”

He smiled at her, gave her a peck on the cheek and wished her good
luck even though he wasn't sure what he was giving luck for.
“See ya later.” he said
“Ok, goodbye. I love you.”
He stared at her, a look of surprise on her face, she simply kept talking
“Don’t worry you can tell me later. Bye”

As she walked out the door Angel’s mind was screaming at him ‘what
the hell. I knew I should have finished with her already. This was
only supposed to be a bit of fun. Well, I guess there’s only one
solution. ’He had made his decision, and knowing that he walked out the door.

Doctor's Office

Buffy chewed her lip nervously as she sat in the waiting room, waiting to be called back in for her test results. She sat staring into space for thirty minutes until she heard someone call out.

“Buffy Summers”

she looked up at the receptionist who smiled and told her,

“The doctor will see you now.”

She had butterflies in the pit of her tummy as she entered the office again and sat down. The doctor looked at her and cleared his throat

“Well Miss Summers, I have your test results.”

Buffy knew by the tone of his voice what he was going to say before he even spoke the words

“You’re pregnant”

Buffy’s mind was reeling. She wasn’t surprised, somehow she knew that would be the result, but she was still finding it hard to take the doctor’s words in. She wasn’t sure how she felt or how she should feel. The doctor was watching her and waiting for her response. She looked at him and gave a small smile. She sat for another ten minutes while the doctor went through the motions of explaining things to her and telling her options. When he had finished, she uttered

“Thank you”

She stood up and left the office in a daze.

She spent the next three hours walking around the streets of Los Angeles, trying to get her head around what the doctor had said. Those two words were going to change her life forever. She felt happy with Angel, but she knew everything would be different. She thought of the implications of her being pregnant. She tried to imagine Angel’s reaction, but she felt unsure. But there was one thing she was sure of, she was keeping the baby. There was no way she would
murder the baby. She kept walking, with the thoughts running through
her head until it was time to go back to Angel’s. She was going to
tell him. Tell him the news she was sure he wouldn't like.

Angel’s Apartment

Angel was waiting for Buffy to arrive, he had been thinking all day and had decided what he was going to do. He was going to tell her. She had to her this before they got further into the relationship. He was watching TV. when she knocked on the door. Buffy tried to act like everything was fine, but her head was completely mixed up. She felt so confused.

“Hi.” he greeted as she walked in the door.
“Hi.” she replied with a smile.
They looked at one another and both spoke at the same time.

“I have to tell you something”
“We need to talk”

“You go first” Angel told her

‘You can do this’  was the mantra that was running through her head as she started to speak.

“Angel, when I told you I loved you this morning, I meant it. Angel,
I’ve never felt this way before.”

“Buffy.” he cut her off “I don’t love you. I only wanted some fun. So, we’re  over. I don’t want to see you anymore.” He thought saying it fast and simple would help.Tears sprang to her eyes as she pleaded with him

“Angel, no. You can’t mean that. I know we haven’t been together
long, but you said you cared about me.”

“Well I don’t. I lied Buffy. Get over it.” He was turning cruel, she hasn't seen him like this before.

“No.” she cried “you can’t do this. Not now”

“And why not?” his voice had a menacing edge to it as he spoke “why
can’t I do this now. No forget it, I already did it.”

“Angel please.” she was begging now a steady stream of tears falling
down her face “please Angel, don’t do this I have to tell you
something”

“So tell me.” he yelled out stretching his arms.

“I’m pregnant.” she only just managed to choke the words out.

Angel looked at her, he looked stricken at her words, but just glared at her.

“You idiot. How could you be so stupid? How can you be pregnant
you’re on the pill?” he screamed.

Buffy sobbed as she answered him

“Not that first night. I wasn’t then. I went on the pill straight after. I didn’t think“

“You didn’t think. You stupid bitch.”  His voice was cold and
menacing.

“Angel, I’m sorry. But please let’s try and fix this” She was actually afraid of him. The first time she has ever been afraid of him.

Angel replied in a cold voice

“I don’t want to fix it. I don’t want you. And I definitely don’t want a baby. We’re through., get used to it and get out.”

Buffy fled the apartment in tears. She ran until she reached her
house. She hoped to avoid her parents but as she walked through the door her mother came out of the living room, she frowned when she saw her daughter’s tears.
“Buffy, honey, what’s wrong?” Joyce Summers asked, concern lacing her voice.
Buffy broke down and her mother wrapped her into a hug.
“Buffy, sweetheart what’s the matter? You need to tell me.”
“Mommy, I’m so sorry.” she sobbed.
“Sweetheart why are you sorry?” Joyce was really starting to worry
and with her daughter’s reply, her whole world changed
“Mommy, I’m pregnant.”

/N: Thanx to my beta darlawinifred for helping me out with yet another chapter.

Spuffy101- I took your hint. There’s not much, but it’s something. Please keep reviewing everyone. I love reviews.

Chapter 5: Not My Son Anymore

It had been 3 days since the birth of baby Anthony and he and Buffy were being released from the hospital. Buffy had spent those three days thinking about everything. She had doted on her beautiful son and still couldn’t believe how blessed she felt that he was hers. But she also felt unbelievable pain at the fact that tomorrow would be the last time she could openly call him her son for a long time. She had also thought a lot about Angel. She had called to tell him he had a son but he simply sneered, declared he wanted nothing to do with it and hung up. Buffy had decided then and there that she didn’t want anything more to do with him. It was one thing to hurt her, but to deny their son was unforgivable they didn’t need him.

“Buffy, your parents are here to take you and Anthony home”

Buffy looked up and smiled at the nurse in a silent thank you. She went over to the baby’s portable crib and gathered him up in her arms. “Come on baby boy, let’s go”

She walked out of the door of her hospital and met her parents. She followed behind them to her father’s car. She strapped him into his car seat and settled in beside him. As the car drove her back to her parent’s house, she thought about what awaited her in Sunnydale. ‘Oh well, guess I’ll find out tomorrow’ That night after she had put Anthony to sleep, she set about getting everything ready for leaving tomorrow. She packed up her most treasured possessions as that was all her father was allowing her to take from his house, those few things like pictures and keepsakes, along with her clothes made up all of her worldly possessions. She was relieved that her parents had at least been kind enough to buy Anthony some baby clothes and essential baby things. But there wasn’t much. After everything was done, she settled down for one last night in her own bed. They were leaving first thing in the morning. She knew her parents were eager for her to be gone. Needless to say, she didn’t sleep well that night.

Next Morning: Summer’s Car

Anthony hadn’t been of any trouble the night before, having woken only for his feed before nodding off to sleep again. Since he was born, Buffy had noticed that he was a very good baby. He slept well at night, and only cried for feeds or diaper changes and the like. But Buffy still hadn’t slept well. She was nervous, she had no idea who the people she would be staying with were. She knew it was a man of about her father’s age and his son, but that was all she knew. She was also replaying the fact that she could not call Anthony her son and it was tearing her apart inside.

“Buffy” she heard her mother’s through the haze of thought swirling in her mind

“hmm?”

“Buffy did you hear a word I just said” her mother asked

“sorry mom, I was miles away. What did you say?”

“I said we will be there shortly, so make sure you’re all set to meet the Giles’”

“Ok mom” she said absently Her mother just frowned and went back to looking out the front window, while Buffy went back into her thoughts.

Same time 1630 Revello Drive- Sunnydale

“William, will you come down here please” Rupert Giles called to his son.

He was waiting impatiently at the foot of the stairs when a his teenaged son came stomping down the stairs. A tired look on his face.

“Yeah dad, what can I do for you?” his London accent coming across very strong as he spoke.

“William, our new lodgers will be here any time and I want you to be here when they do.” Rupert said irritably .

“Dad I can’t I’m meeting the guys today, we have practice I can’t miss it.”

“William, please, can’t you just miss it this once, I’d really rather you be here when they arrive.”

“I would if I could but I really can’t. I’m sorry” Giles let it go as his son did sound genuinely apologetic.

“Ok, if you really can’t. But I want you back here by 5 for dinner. We will have a proper meal to welcome the girl here properly.”

“Yeah, dad, why exactly is she coming here anyway?”  he enquired.

“I told you a distant relative of mine died during childbirth last week. I’m her only relative so I was asked to take the child in. I couldn’t let them pot him in foster care. The young girl was my relative’s best friend, she is going to look after the baby, serve as his nanny. She has been caring for him since he was born.” He had practiced the story so many times that the lie rolled easily off histongue. William just shrugged

 “Ok, see you later dad.”

“Bye.” he called to his son’s retreating back.

15 minutes later Rupert heard a car pull up into the driveway. He went out to the door to meet with his old friend and Colleague.
“Rupert” Hank said cheerily “How have you been?”
“I’m doing alright thank you, Hank”
“Good I’m glad. Rupert I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you are doing this favour for me.”
Giles cleared his throat “Perhaps we should take this conversation inside, Let’s get everything into the house.”

Buffy watched the hustle and bustle as everyone pulled bags from the car to the house. She stood in the driveway holding her precious bundle. Wanting to squeeze in as much time as she could where he was still "her" son. Eventually though everything was inside and she was called on to, go into the house.
“Rupert, you remember my wife Joyce.”
“Yes of course. It’s lovely to see you Joyce.” he said as he shook her hand.
“And this” Hank continued “is Buffy, my daughter” he spoke the words with disappointment in his voice.
“It’s very nice to meet you Buffy” he greeted “Please call me Rupert,
or Giles whichever you prefer. And please treat this place as what it
is your home.”
Buffy just smiled at him gratefully still clinging to her son.
“And who is this.” he questioned.
Buffy looked at him with a proud glint in her eyes as she spoke.
“This is Anthony, my-“
“Your cousin’s son, Rupert” Hank cut in.
Buffy looked hurt and on the verge of tears.
“Dad please let me say it. Let me have this one time to say, please.”
Hank did not look best pleased and was about to say something but Giles beat him to it.
“Of course you can say it Buffy.”
Buffy felt an overwhelming gratitude to this man. And somehow, she knew that he wasn’t a bad person.
“Thank you” she said, tears glistening in her eyes “This is Anthony, my son.”
She looked down at him with so much love and it did not go unnoticed. Giles felt immense sympathy for the girl standing before him, but he knew that he had to go along with what Hank wanted. The man had too much power, he couldn’t risk going against his wishes. And he had an idea that his daughter knew this too.

“Well,” Hank started “I don’t see any point in us staying any longer. Come on Joyce, this isn’t our problem anymore. Don’t worry Buffy we will come and see you sometimes. Maybe you can begin to redeem yourself.” all of this was said with a hint of contempt. And it cut Buffy to the bone.
“Goodbye Rupert.”
“Goodbye Hank.”

Buffy watched as her parents left, and felt a mixture of both relief and hurt, but she didn’t ponder on it. They were gone now, nothing could be done about it. When she turned around and Giles started to speak to her.
“Well, Buffy.” he removed his glasses and started to clean them “
what do you say we put young Anthony in his crib and I’ll show you where everything is?”
She shook her head frantically,
“No, I don’t want to put him down.”
“Why ever not” he asked surprise.
“Because if I put him down then it’s real. The lies start. He’s not my son anymore.”
Giles could sense the hurt and fear and anger that she had felt for months roll off her in waves. He tried to comfort her with words.
“Buffy, dear, sit down”
she did as he instructed and awaited a lecture. She was surprised when all she heard was a gentle voice.
“Buffy, he is still your son. No one can change that.”
“But no one can know. And if no one knows then it isn’t real."
She was openly crying now.
“Buffy, whether people know or not he is still your son. You are the one who gave birth to him. Nobody can take that away from you” his voice was soft and soothing and she couldn’t help thinking, ‘ his son is so lucky. This is the kind of person a father should be’
“But my dad-“
“Forget what your father has said to you Buffy, Anthony is your son. People may not know but you will still be here. You will be raising him, but you will have my help because of this arrangement. And what your father seems to have forgotten is that you are seventeen in a couple of months. And then there will only be a year until you turn 18. Think about it Buffy, when you turn eighteen, there is nothing your father can do. You will be an adult and be free to do what you
wish. That includes openly raise your son.”
She couldn’t help herself, she threw herself into his arms. She hugged him with tears in her eyes.
“Giles, thank you. Thank you so much. You have no idea how much those words meant to me.”
He was very flustered by her affection.
“Ah, well, you’re uh you’re welcome Buffy. Now, let’s put him in his
crib and get you settled in.”

After they were through with the grand tour and Buffy had freshened up a bit, she and Giles sat at the kitchen table talking.
“Giles, does, um, does your son know the truth?”
“No” he answered "William isn’t aware of the situation. Your father requested that be one of the terms of the arrangement.”
“oh, ok.”
“You will meet him later, he wanted to be here to meet you this afternoon but he had a prior engagement I’m afraid.”
“That’s ok. I’m kind of glad. No offence it’s just that I was a bit of a mess earlier.”
“None taken” he told her with a smile on his face “I completely understand.”

He looked up at the clock and noticed it had just gone 5 o’clock. And like clockwork, he heard the front door open. Buffy looked up when she heard someone call

“Hey dad, I’m home.”

Buffy looked at the kitchen door and was met by a beautiful sight. Standing there was a boy of 18. He was little bit taller than average, he had cheekbones so sharp they should have been illegal. He was lean and had well muscled arms, and chest by what she could see through his tight black t- shirt. He also wore black jeans and black boots. He had bleached blonde hair, which looked stunning next to his features. But looking up she found herself looking at the best thing about him his beautiful, clear blue eyes. She couldn’t think of a shade of the blue that matched his eyes.

Meanwhile, he was having similar thoughts about the girl in front of him. He took in her long blonde hair, eyes the colour of emeralds and beautiful face. She was a tiny little thing. Both of them shared the same thought of what the other was.

‘Perfection’.

Both teens were snapped out of their thoughts when Giles cleared his throat.
“Buffy I would like you to meet my son.” he said.
“Hi” she said to him “I’m Buffy.”
“Hello pet,” he replied to the vision in front of him. He held his hand
out to her, “I’m William, but you can call me Spike.”

Chapter 6: Getting To Know You

30 minutes had passed since Buffy and Spike had first set eyes on each other, neither one had said much to the other, mainly because a few minutes after Spike came in Anthony awoke for his feeding. Buffy was currently in his nursery feeding him his bottle. Completely unaware of what was going on downstairs.

In the Kitchen

“Well, what do you think of her?” Giles asked his son.
“She seems ok. Haven’t exactly spoken to her much, can’t really say
I’m qualified to judge what she’s like. Why don’t you tell me.”
“She is a very charming young lady.” Giles informed his son “She’s taking this whole situation pretty hard.” Giles was relieved that in some ways he could be honest about what was going on, it was not a lie to say that Buffy was finding the situation upsetting.
“Don’t worry dad, was goin’ to be nice to her anyway. Seems like a
nice enough chit.”
“Yes well, quite.”

The men were interrupted by Buffy’s reappearance in the kitchen.
“Buffy, good you’re back, we were just about to order dinner.”
Spike looked at his father’s flustered attempt to cover up their conversation, with amusement, but managed not to show it.
“I thought that seeing as it is your first night we would order in.”
“Oh, can we have Chinese or pizza” Spike jumped in.
“William, I was thinking we might have something a little nicer, after all this is for a special occasion, and I was also intending to give Buffy the decision of what we eat.”
He smiled reassuringly over at her while Spike pouted from his seat on top of the counter.
“Actually Giles, I really appreciate the effort and all but I think Chinese sounds good.” she said sheepishly. Giles however did not seem put out in the least.
“Don’t look so worried Buffy, I’m not going to be annoyed that you want Chinese food. However, I will have to put up with my son’s smug look for the rest of the evening.”
Buffy giggled nervously at the comment and Spike didn’t think he had
ever heard a nicer sound.
“Chinese it is then, is there anything in particular you would like?”
She shook her head no and Giles went to call in the order. She looked around the kitchen nervously as now only she and Spike were left in the room. She felt she should start a conversation with him, but she had no idea what to say. However, she didn’t need to worry.
“So, Pet, how are you liking the place so far?” he inquired.
“It seems ok. I haven’t left the house yet, but it seems like a nice enough town. Different though.”
“Well there isn’t much to do around here, only really one good hang out for people our age, but the people are nice enough” he told her.
“That’s good...” she was interrupted by Giles calling them into the
living room to watch TV while they waited on their delivery. The next hour and a half passed in relative peace. Their dinner arrived, and they ate around the kitchen table with scattered conversation. Buffy had decided that Spike seemed like an alright guy, but she wasn’t going to let herself get too involve ‘not after what happened with Angel’ she told herself ‘it just causes too much heartache and the
fact I have a child' After the meal was finished and the dishes were in the dishwasher, Buffy started to feel awkward.  She didn’t know what she should do now. Anthony wasn’t due to be fed for another hour or two. And she was still getting used to her new environment. She wasn’t sure if she was expected to just go to her room and wait until Anthony needed something. At home all she ever did was get sent to her room. She saw Giles looking at her with a concerned look on his face before he spoke
“Buffy are you ok?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just not sure, what I should do now. Did you want me just to go to my room until Anthony wakes up?”
Giles removed his glasses wiping them in exasperation.
“Buffy don’t be silly. This is your home now and you must feel free to treat it as such.”
“I have an idea.” Spike interjected “why don’t I take Buffy out for a couple of hours. Show her around town help her get used to the place. What do you say, luv?”
“Um, thanks for the offer Spike, but I don’t think so. I need to stay here in case Anthony needs anything. That’s my job after all.”
“I’m sure dad doesn’t mind looking after the little one for a while. Do you dad?”
“Of course not” he assured her.
“I still think I’ll pass. Thanks though.”
“Buffy can I speak to you a minute.” Giles requested.
She followed him into the hall.
“Buffy” he began “were you not listening to me this afternoon. I told you that nothing is going to change the fact that Anthony is yours. But you can’t keep yourself locked up at home all the time.”
“I know, but I just don’t want to leave him. I, I’m afraid.”
“Buffy, you don’t have to be afraid, he will still be here when you get back. I’ll take good care of him. I promise. Trust me.”
“I do” she assured him “It’s just-“
“It’s just nothing. Go with William. Have fun.”
“OK, ok you win. I’ll go” she said, pretending to pout. Giles led her back to the kitchen where Spike was waiting.
“So, where are we going.” she asked.
Spike smirked and opened the door for her.
“You’ll just have to wait and see.” he said “Let’s go.”
Giles watched them go, glad that Buffy was at least making an effort to overcome her fears.

 

Main Street

“That is the Sun Cinema” Spike pointed to a building on his right. It’s the only cinema they have in this town, so you’ll see a lot of kids hanging around.

“That is my dad’s shop ‘The Magic Box’ and before you say it I know, what you’re thinking, my dad was a lawyer but when we moved here he wanted a change. So now, he owns the shop. There aren’t many shops around but there is a bookshop next door, if you like to read” he continued enthusiastically. They crossed the street and came to stop outside of a coffee shop.

“This is the ‘Espresso Pump’ he told her. Most of us youngsters hang around here. It’s where we’re going now.” he told her as he led her inside. She looked at him as they sat down wondering why he was being so nice to her. She decided the only way to find out was to voice her questions.
“What do you want to drink pet?” he asked as he stood to go to the
counter.
“Um, Cappuccino please” she asked politely.
“Sure thing, I’ll just be a minute.”
She watched him as he departed and couldn’t help the small smile that crossed her face. When he came back with their drinks Buffy decided to get straight to her question.
“Spike, not that I don’t appreciate it, because I do, but why are you being so nice. What is this all about.”
He was taken aback for a moment, but he understood where she was coming from, they had only just met and had hardly spoken to one another.
“Well pet, we don’t really know each other, but you seem to be really decent. Especially compared to people around here. Somebody I could come to like.”
She was panicked for a minute so had to say something.
“Spike, I’m sure you’re really nice and everything but I’m not looking for a relationship of any kind.”
“Oh no, Buffy. I don’t want you to think that’s what I’m after. I’m not saying I couldn’t like you in that way but, I’m happy to be friends with you. This is just all about getting to know you.” he smiled warmly at her and she smiled back
“Friends” she repeated “I’d like that.”
“Good.”
They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before he started.
“So, how come you came to be Anthony’s nanny instead of being at school?”
This was the question Buffy had been dreading, but she felt it was probably better to get it over with from the beginning.
“Well” she started “Your dad’s cousin and I were close back in LA. She was my best friend and she didn’t have any family so she confided in me when she found out she was pregnant. I helped her through it. She had a lot of health problems and didn’t make it through the birth. She had always said if anything happened she wanted me to look after her baby.” her voice faltered and she paused a moment to get it back .
“She wanted me to look after him, and I wasn’t doing great at school. When they said they were bringing him here, I contacted your father. I couldn’t take care of him from LA so I asked about working as a nanny so that I could be there like she wanted. Your dad agreed and the rest as they say is history.” Spike listened intently as she spoke, unlike Angel he was genuinely interested in what she had to say.
“My turn” Buffy said “you’re 18 right?” he nodded in reply.
“So are you still at school or college or what?”
“I’m still at school. I’m a senior. Graduate in the summer.” he replied to her question.
“Now me.” he smirked “Who named Anthony?”
She looked away nervously as she tried to think of a convincing answer
“Um... Faith did. That was your dad’s cousin’s name. She had picked it out a few days before he was born. I thought she would want to keep it.” there that should do it
“What do you want to do after you graduate?”
“I wanna go to college, don’t tell anyone I told you, but I wanna be a writer. I was thinking that’s what I would major in Creative Writing.”
Buffy couldn’t believe her ears. This boy whom she had known only a few hours shared one of her biggest dreams and she let it slip out without realizing.
“Me too.” It cam out barely a whisper.
“What?” He asked confused.
“Oh, I said way cool.”
“Oh. Thanks.” He bought it.
“So I’m up next. Right pet?”
She nodded her agreement.
“What’s Anthony’s surname?”
“Why are you so interested in Anthony?” she asked, slightly annoyed at his questioning.
“Sorry pet, it’s just dad hasn’t really told me much about what’s going on. I guess I just want to know. I’ll drop it.”
“Thanks.”
“So, what did you want to do if you had stayed at school?” he asked
changing the subject.
“I was thinking I’d like to go into some kind of design.” she told him. Her face lighting up as she talked. They stayed that way for about another hour, firing questions back and forth at one another. Before they left, Spike had one last question.
“When are you going to tell me whatever secret it is that you have?” She was surprised to say the least, she hadn’t been expecting any
more questions
“What makes you think I have a secret.” she asked defensively.
“Look, pet. Buffy, I can tell by looking at your eyes that you’re hiding something, but I won’t push you. I just want to know, when you're ready to tell me.”
“Someday.”

They left the coffee shop and walked in silence back home. Wen they arrived back, they went in to the living room to see both Giles and Anthony asleep on the couch. Buffy smiled at the sight of her son and the man who so far had been more like a dad to her than her own, and she had only known him a few hours. She tiptoed across the room to pick up the sleeping child. She walked quietly up the stairs, Spike close on her heels and headed towards the nursery. Once inside she set about getting him ready for bed. She turned around and saw Spike watching her silently. When he knew she had seen him, he joined her in the room and took the diaper from her hands and set to
work. Buffy watched in amazement. She thought he was the perfect man. Unfortunately, she couldn’t do anything about it. She couldn’t take the risk. She knew however that she could fall in love with him. And Spike was thinking exactly the same thing of her. When he had finished, Buffy picked her son up and headed to the crib. Before placing him in it she turned to spike and whispered
“Spike meet Anthony.”
He gave a soft smile and whispered back.
“Hey little one, nice to meet you but it’s time for bed.”
He watched Buffy place him in the car and saw the look of love and contentment in her eyes. when she leaned down and kissed his forehead. Something was definitely going on. He wanted to know what, but he trusted she would tell him when she wanted to. As they turned to leave he turned back placing a soft kiss on the baby’s forehead
“Night, little bit.” he whispered to the baby’s sleeping form. He heard Buffy utter a soft
“Goodnight sweetheart." before they left the room.
He walked her down the hall to her room. When they got her door he stopped and said goodnight.
“Thank you for tonight.” she said softly “I had fun.”
“Me too” He replied “I enjoyed getting to know you.” he gave her a smile and turned to walk away. She watched him go thinking of how easily she would fall in love with him before turning into her room and closing the door.

/N: Thanks to my beta darlawinifred. Keep reviewing, I love reviews.

Disclaimer, all characters other than baby Anthony belong to Joss Whedon and ME. The song “Sounds Like a Personal Problem” belongs to Ghost of the Robot

Chapter 7: Living Life

It was Saturday again. The past week passed uneventfully for Buffy.
She stayed in the house most the time so still hadn’t met anyone
other than Giles, Spike and their immediate neighbours. Buffy filled
her days with looking after Anthony, relishing in being able to do so
without having to worry about what people, namely her parents, would think. It still hurt not to be able to say he was her son, but she
said it as often as possible when she was in the nursery with him.

Over the past few days, that night with Spike had played repeatedly
in her head. She was awed at his reaction to Anthony; she had been
even more surprised since then as he always tried to help her out
with the baby as best he could. She found it unbelievably sweet that
he was making such an effort, but she had no idea why he was. Of
course, he hadn’t been around much during the day because he had
school and he had some sort of practice for some thing he had coming
up later in the week, but he always helped her in the evening when he
was home. They had also spent a lot of time talking after Anthony was
put down for the night and Buffy had found her prediction to be
correct. She was quickly falling for the young man but was determined never to act on the feelings. She felt it would be unfair to him, so she worked hard at being his friend. She had come to realize that most people had no idea who he really was. He put on an act of being the tough guy. But it wasn’t true, he was a teenager who had been through a lot and put up a front so that he wouldn’t be hurt. And
Buffy was in awe that for some reason he seemed to be allowing her to see who he really was. Later that day Buffy was in the nursery with Anthony. She was sitting on the rocking chair in the corner with him in her arms singing softly to him, when she heard a soft knock on the door. She looked up to see Spike standing in the doorway.

“Hi.” she greeted him softly.

“Hey, how’s the bit today?” he asked as he entered the room.

“He’s good. He’s just had his bottle, I was just trying to get him
back to sleep,” she told him quietly.

“Can I try?” he asked with an unusual shyness and uncertainty that

Buffy wasn’t used to by now.

“Of course” she put Anthony in his arms and stood to the side to let
him sit. She watched as he rocked Anthony back and forth in the chair
whispering to him sweetly.

“Hey there bit, you look kind of tired to me. Time to sleep, be good
for uncle Spike.”

Buffy’s breath hitched in her throat when she heard that. It wasn’t
that she didn’t like it she just wasn’t expecting it. But she

realized that it had nothing to do with her, after all, he didn’t
know that Anthony was hers. So, she let a smile cross her face as she
turned and headed out of the room. She returned a few minutes later
with a Polaroid camera, and snapped a picture before Spike realized
what she was doing. He looked up when he saw the flash, and grinned
at her. He looked down at the baby in his arms, and found him fast
asleep so he stood up and placed him in his crib and walked over to
Buffy.

“You know pet, that wasn’t very nice.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, not sounding the least bit apologetic “but I
couldn’t help myself. It was just too sweet looking.”

“Ok,” he smiled “Can I see it.”

She picked the picture up from the changing table and handed it to
Spike, watching as a soft smile passed his handsome features.  He
looked embarrassed as he spoke.

“Um, Buffy, do you think... would it be ok if I kept this?”

Spike found it hard to believe how attached he had become to the baby in just a week. It had started that first night when he saw the look
on Buffy’s face as she held him, he had realised there was something
more to her story, but more importantly he could see how much she
cared about this child. So, he made an effort so that he could stay
close to her. However, he had found that he actually enjoyed spending
time helping take care of him, and had quickly started to develop a
bond with the little boy. Buffy noticed the uncertainty in his
features, she squeezed his arm, gave him a small smile and answered
him.

“Of course, you can keep it. It’s all yours.”

“Thank you.” he replied genuinely.

They walked into the hall before Spike stopped and turned to her.

“Buffy.” he started.

She looked at him waiting for him to go on

“I was wondering, I know you don’t want to get involved and I won’t
force the issue. But you still don’t know anyone here, I was
wondering if you wanted to go to the Bronze with me tonight. As
friends obviously. I’ll introduce you to some people, you can unwind
a bit.

“I’d love to.” She said with a huge smile.

“Great.” He said obviously pleased.

“But I feel guilty asking your dad to watch Anthony again it’s my job
to look after him.”

“Buffy you’re his nanny but you’re allowed a night off. Hell even
parents get that.”

“Ok, I’ll asked him.” Spike’s smile widened at her answer.

“Great well we leave at seven. See you later.”

Giles had been more than happy to agree to look after Anthony for the
night so Buffy was now in her room getting dressed. Since they were
going as friends, she didn’t want to be too dressed up, so she had
picked out one of her favourite outfits that she wore going out with
friends. She wore a pair of low-slung leather trousers; she teamed
them with another of her wide selection of halter-tops, her favourite
item of clothing when she was going out. This one was deep red and
sparkly. Her hair was slightly curled and left down, pooling around
her shoulders. She kept her make-up light and natural, finishing off
with a small amount of red lip-gloss. She gave herself a final look
in the mirror and after deciding that she looked ok, she headed
downstairs.

Spike was at the bottom of the of the stairs when she started down
them, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head when he saw her. She
looked beautiful and he really wished that they were going as more
than friends. He smiled at her as he reached the bottom of the stairs.

“You look great, Luv.”

She blushed and mumbled a quick, “Thank you.”

She went to the living room to speak to Giles.

“Giles that’s us leaving.”

“Oh, yes, of course. You look lovely Buffy.”

“Thank you,” she smiled “I’ll try not to be too late.” She said
turning to Giles.

“Please don’t worry about it. Just have fun.”

“I’ll try.” she smiled and walked over. She took Anthony from him and gave him a quick kiss on the head before handing him back to Giles.

“Giles, call my cell if you need me for anything.”

“I won’t need anything. Now go, have fun.”

“Ok, ok, we’re going. Bye Giles.”

“Goodnight Buffy.”

“Night dad.” Spike chimed in.

They turned and walked out the door heading for the club.

The Bronze

They two teens walked into the busy club together. She noticed a lot
of people their age around, sitting at tables talking and laughing.
There was a dance floor where some kids were dancing to music that
was coming from a DJ or the stereo system. They all seemed to be
having fun. Spike led her to a booth in the corner of the club where
she saw a group of people sitting.

“Hey guys.” Spike said as they approached.

The people at the table turned to them and smiled. A boy with brown
hair and eyes and a friendly smile spoke up first

“Hey, Spike how’s it going’?”

“Alright, whelp.” He smirked. They boy just grinned and Spike started
the introductions.

“Ok, Buffy these are my friends. That one there,” he told her
pointing at the boy who had spoke when they first came in “is Xander.
He’s a bit of a goof but he’s alright.”

“Hey.” he said to her.

“Hi.” she said with a small wave.

Spike continued, he pointed to a shy looking red head and a boy with
dark blue hair

“This is Willow and her boyfriend Oz. Willow is a genius, and really
shy but she’s a gem. And Oz. Well he’s Oz he doesn’t talk much.”

Willow giggled nervously.

“H- Hi, it’s um, n-nice to meet you.” She held out her hand and Buffy
shook it. Oz nodded at her as greeting.

“Guys,” Spike went on “this is Buffy.”

“Well Buffy,” Xander spoke up “Spike’s told us all about you. You’ve made quite an Impression our boy here.”

“Can it whelp.” Spike gritted out.

“Ignore him Buffy,” Willow laughed “he just likes to embarrass Spike.”

Buffy smiled gratefully at the red head that had managed to make her
feel more at ease. She was surprised by the yelp she heard.

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry Buffy, I’m being so rude. Sit down please. Oh
I’m so sorry” Willow babbled.

“Don’t worry about it.” Buffy reassured her with a warm smile.

Spike was still standing and Buffy was about to say something when he spoke first

“Hey Oz, we need to go. We have that thing to do.”

Oz only nodded and stood up giving Willow a peck on the cheek

“Where are you going?” Buffy asked .

“That’s a surprise Luv. You’ll find out soon enough.” He answered,
shooting a look at the other two occupants at the table before
walking away. Buffy turned back to his friends.

“So, um, are you guys at school with Spike?”

“Yeah.” Willow replied “We have a class or  two together but that’s
because I have a few senior classes. But we’re juniors. I just do

well in... school.” she blushed.

“So, Buff.” Xander cut in “Are you going to be starting school with
us soon?”

“Um, no actually. I’m working as a nanny for Spike’s dad.” she
answered, her nervousness evident in her voice.

“But you’re only sixteen. Right?” Willow asked.

“Yeah.”

“So you should be at school.”

“I really don’t mind.” Buffy insisted “My friend wanted me to look
after her son, I wasn’t doing great in school so I thought, what the
hell.”

The two teens could tell she felt uncomfortable in the conversation,
so Xander changed the subject.

“So what was it like living in LA?”

“It was ok. The shopping was fantastic, but the people were so
superficial, it was hard to know who was a fake and who was genuine.” she told them her thoughts drifting to Angel.

“What,” Xander exclaimed “you mean some people in LA have real
noses?” he joked.

This broke the ice and Buffy immediately felt at ease. This started a
round of conversation, and joking, and Buffy had decided that she
liked the two. She already felt like she had another two friends. The
banter continued until they heard a voice over the microphone. Buffy
turned around and was surprised to see Spike on the stage holding a
guitar, Oz was there also, in his hand was a bass guitar ‘ so that’s
what he was practicing’ she thought. She had to admit she was
pleasantly surprised. She sat back in her seat waiting for Spike to
speak.

“Hey everybody.” he called out over the microphone “the first song
we’re gonna sing tonight is one I just wrote a few days ago. I think
it’s something most of us are gonna feel at some point. I want to
dedicate it to my new friend.”

Buffy smiled inwardly knowing he meant her, while Willow and Xander looked at each other knowingly. Surprised as she had been when she had seen him on the stage, it didn’t compare to her surprise when she heard him start to sing.

What is this crap, I'm going through,

where am I at, and who are you,

to make me feel, like I'm so scared,

caught me off-guard, was not prepared,

for you,

so smart, so cool,

to me,

life seems, it shouldn't be this way.

His voice was deep and seductive. He used every part of the stage,
looking directly at the stage as he sang. The only word Buffy could
think of to describe it was hypnotic. She felt herself being pulled
in. Paying perfect attention to the words.

Spike thought of her as he sung the words. He wrote it to get out how
he felt about her, as an explanation.  Also, because he wanted to
show her he wanted to know what she was hiding. He looked at her from the corner of his eye for the entire song.

So here I am, and there you are,

sitting so close, feeling so far,

from me and I, can't figure out,

what I should say, what's this about,

to you,

to smart, to cool,

for me,

life seems, it shouldn't be this way...

When the song finished, Buffy clapped with the rest of the crowd. She
couldn’t believe how talented he was.  She stood up to greet him as
he came back to the table

“You were great.” she said enthusiastically.

“Thanks, Luv.” she thought she saw a slight blush was he said this.

“I had no idea you could sing like that.”

“Well now you do.” He said with a beautiful smile showing.

He sat down beside her and they talked for another two hours. It was
two hours of fun and Buffy finally felt like she could fit in
somewhere. But she did miss her son, and more than ever she wanted to be able to tell them the truth. After two hours, Spike turned to her,

“Think we should be going pet.”

“Yeah you’re right. “

She turned her new friends and thanked them for being so welcoming.

“Oh Buffy, here’s my phone number. Give me a call and we’ll go
shopping or something.” Willow said excitedly “It’s gonna be great
having another girl around.”

Buffy smiled at her. “I will. Goodbye guys.”

Everyone said goodbye to each other and Buffy and Spike headed out of the club. Once they were outside Spike started talking.

“So what’d you think?”

“It was great” she replied honestly “you’re friends are really nice.
Willow is the best. And you were fantastic.”

“Thanks pet, well let’s get you home.”

As they started towards home Buffy spoke softly.

“Do you know what tonight made me realize?” she asked him

“What?”

“It’s time to stop wondering about what could have been. I can’t keep
wallowing like I have been. It’s time to start living life”

“I think you’re right, Luv.” he said, “I think you’re right.”

They walked the rest of the way in comfortable silence.