Title: Real Friends
Author: Paradox761
Email: Paradox761@mail.com
Website: members.tripod.com/~Paradox761
Disclaimer: Joss and co. own all things Buffy, no copyright infringement is intended so please don’t sue. I don’t have any money anyway.
Summery: Post “Superstar”, Xander confronts Buffy about the way she’s been treating him lately. Buffy denies it of course, but when Willow takes Xander’s side she’s forced to do some series thinking about her friends. Also, things heat up in the romance department for Xander and Anya, as well as for Willow and Tara. Can Xander, Willow and Buffy make it through all this and still come out friends on the other side?
Spoilers and such: General spoilers for season four, specifically for “Superstar”. Also, this is my first attempt at a Xander/Anya, so please be gentle. I’m of the mindset that Anya is different when she and Xander are alone, so you might find her characterization off a little bit. It’s all a matter of perspective. Also, this story was written before “New Moon Rising”, which kind of makes it a moot point as far as W/T, but I don’t think TPTB have been very far with the relationship as far as showing how they fell in love. Consider this an alternative explanation.
Also, acknowledgments and thanks have to go to the denizens of alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer. This story was inspired by the discussion threads that sprung up around “Superstar”. I’d like to thank you all by name, but I don’t have that kind of time here.
(BtVS, Xander/Anya, Willow/Tara, NC-17)

(4/9)

Willow was walking through campus, not really paying attention to where she was going when she heard a voice call her name. It took her until the voice called it again before her mind registered it, and she turned. “Oh, hey Tara.”

“You all right Willow?” Tara asked as she walked beside her along the path.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Willow answered, her voice betraying that she was anything but fine. “I’m just a little distracted.”

“What happened?”

“Well, remember I told you Buffy and I were having lunch with Xander today?” Tara nodded. “Xander and Buffy had an argument, a pretty big one too.”

“Oh my, what happened?”

“Well, Xander told Anya that he loved her, and I know that they haven’t been together very long and that Anya used to be a demon but I trust Xander and he really seems to care about her and so does she, care about him I mean. So I told Xander I was happy for him, but Buffy being all critical and saying how we can’t trust her and that Xander was just in it for sex, and Xander got upset because he didn’t think she was being fair, and he was right, she wasn’t. I mean, how could she really think that all Xander cared about was sex, he’s are friend, we mean more to him then just eye candy.” Willow finally stopped to breathe while Tara tried to absorb everything she had just said.

“Whoa, you really must be upset. You’re really babbling.”

“Sorry,” Willow said sheepishly.

“Nothing to be sorry about,” Tara said. “Come here, sit down,” she said leading her to a nearby bench.

Willow sat down and took a couple deep breaths. Her brain had been going a million miles a minute ever since she had told Buffy off, and she was finally slowing down and forcing her body to relax some. “That’s not even the worst part,” she said after a moment. “After Xander left, Buffy was like ‘Can you believe him’ and I was like, ‘Yes, I can actually’. And I told her that I thought Xander was right and that she hadn’t been treating him like a friend lately and that she wasn’t being fair to him by questioning his feelings for us. She looked so shocked that I would dare to disagree with her, and I was just so angry. Oh Goddess, she probably hates me now.” Willow let her head fall into her hands.

Tara placed a reassuring hand on Willow’s back and rubbed up and down a little. “It’ll be okay Willow, I don’t think Buffy could ever hate you, she’s your best friend. I mean, you guys have had fights before right? It didn’t end the friendship.”

“No, it didn’t. I guess so. But I still can’t believe I said all those things.”

“You meant them, didn’t you?” Willow just nodded. “Well, if you ask me, it was pretty brave then. You shouldn’t be afraid of her Willow, she’s your friend. If you think she’s wrong then you have to tell her. And if she’s really your friend, then she’ll understand.”

Tara was still rubbing Willow’s back and Willow was starting to feel better about things. Maybe Tara was right, maybe Buffy would understand. All she needs is some time. Willow turned to her friend and gave her a hug. “Thanks Tara, I needed to hear that.”

“Any time, Willow,” Tara answered.

Willow hugged her friend tightly and smiled with contentment. She was lucky to have someone like Tara. After Oz had left, she felt so crummy about herself. But Tara always made her feel better. It was probably the first relationship she had where she wasn’t the submissive party. Tara always made her feel wanted, needed even. Willow was still hugging Tara as all these thoughts ran through her head, and she slowly began to realize that the hug was going a little longer then the typical friendly hug. She pulled back a little and smiled at Tara.

Tara smiled back shyly and glanced down at her watch. “Shoot, I have a class and I’m going to be late if I don’t hurry. Are you going to be okay Willow?”

“I’ll be fine, thanks again,” Willow said.

Tara reached out and touched Willow’s hand for a second, favoring her with one more smile before standing form the bench and continuing on her way. Willow watched as she walked away as her thoughts drifted back to the hug. She felt so secure in Tara’s arms, so loved. Loved? Where did that come from?”

“Willow?”

Willow turned at the sound of her name. “Anya?”

“Hey Willow, got a minute?”

“Sure,” Willow answered. She was already finished her classes for the day and was just on the way to the library to study.

Anya sat down next to Willow. “Uh, Xander told me what happened.”

“Oh,” Willow said simply.

“And I wanted to thank you.”

“Thank me?”

“Yeah. It really meant a lot to Xander what you said, about being happy as long as he’s happy. He really cares a lot about what you and Buffy think. That’s why it hurt him so much when Buffy said what she said.”

“How is he?” Willow asked.

“Worried, that he’s lost the friendship of the two people he cares most about in the world. Well, besides me of course.”

“Well, I…wait, two? Why would he be afraid of losing my friendship?”

“Well, I think maybe he thinks you’ll side with Buffy,” Any said.

Willow just nodded sadly. “I guess I can’t blame him for thinking that, it isn’t very often that stand up to Buffy, even if I do think she’s wrong. But Xander could never lose me, he should know that by now.”

“I think deep down he does, but he’s still concerned.” Anya sighed. “It was what Buffy said about the crush, that’s what stung the most. Do you really think that’s what she thinks?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t stick around to find out,” Willow said.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, after Xander went off…I kind of went off too. I mean, I was just so angry about what she said, she wasn’t being fair. I don’t know how Buffy really feels, but whatever it is, Xander and I are in the same boat now. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.” When Anya didn’t speak, Willow turned to face her. She was smiling. “What?”

“Sorry, I just never thought you had it in you, I’m surprised. No offense.”

“None taken, I was a little surprised myself.” Willow paused. “Can I ask you a question Anya?”

“Sure.”

“Do you really love him?”

Anya didn’t answer right away. She just looked introspective for a second before she responded. “Eleven hundred years ago I was human,” she started. “And I thought I knew what love was, but all I knew of it was pain. I was so angry, but what I didn’t realize is that the pain is part of the process. No one can be happy all the time, it doesn’t work that way. I made a decision, a rather rash decision, and I excepted the powers that were afforded to me by my amulet. For over a millennia I tortured and tormented men, because I thought they were evil. Because I blamed them all for my pain. But the truth was that I didn’t understand love. After all those centuries in which I witnessed it, all I saw was the damage it caused. It wasn’t until I was human again that I realized what love really was. It’s a force, and if you don’t respect it as such you’ll end up hurt. And even if you do, you still might end up hurt. But if you don’t take the chance, if you don’t play the game then you can never win.” She laughed a little. “I guess the truth is that I still don’t really know what love is, but I can feel it inside me. Every time I look at Xander, every time he smiles at me, I melt. If it isn’t love…well, then I don’t know what it is and I don’t care. All I care about is Xander, and being with him.”

Willow was silent for a moment. “Wow,” she finally said. “You really do love him. I wish I could feel like that about someone. I mean, I thought I did once, but I’m so sure anymore. Maybe it’s just not meant to happen for me.”

“I wouldn’t say that Willow,” Anya said. “You might even find it right under your nose, some place where you’d least expect it.”

“Sorry Anya, but I don’t believe in storybook romances.” She paused. “Not anymore.”

“Willow, I was a demon for over a thousand years. If I can fall in love, then anything’s possible. You got to believe.”

Willow smiled, but deep down in her heart, she wasn’t sure. She could feel what Anya had described, that true love that was thought to only exist in cheesy novels with Fabio on the cover. But it was so muddled, so confused that she didn’t know what was what anymore. It would take time, that’s what everyone kept telling her. Maybe they were right. Maybe all she had to do was wait it out and everything would make sense again. “Maybe.”




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