Title: Upsetting The Average I/VI (NC-17)
Author's: Evil Hands of Akasha and Seabreeze
Email: AngelsChilde@aol.com and LornesGirl@hotmail.com
Rating: NC-17 for graphic sex and some violence in the UTA series R for Chapter One
Pairing: Mainly Aus/C, but also some Aus/B in the UTA series
Spoilers: ATS up to Double or Nothing, BTVS up to Gone.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to ME and 20th Century Fox. No profit has been made.
Feedback: Yes, please, we crave for it!!!!!
Summary: Alternative ending of Double or Nothing in a slightly altered universe. Angel lost his soul in a card game. Cordelia didn't have the heart to obey Angel's advice and stake him. Crossover.

Chapter One


This was it.

This was it? How did this happen? It was still a blur to Cordy.

Yesterday morning, she was waving good-bye to the sandy beaches and endless evenings in Mexico, the whole flight, she had tried to come to terms with the fact that she was alone. Again. What started out as the happiest trip in a long time had ended in a meditation trip for Groo, being convinced that he had to improve to be worthy of his "Princess" and Cordy flying home herself.

All she had wanted was to be consoled by Angel, who was the only one who could maybe bring some sense to it all. Whatever she had expected the trip to be, it wasn't. As if that wasn't enough, coming home wasn't coming home at all, she had walked into utter chaos.

Connor was gone, Wesley was in the hospital and Angel was beyond grief. She didn't think she was going to get through to him.

Then discovering that Fred and Gunn had become an item, her only silver lining as it turned out. Just as she was ready to hold on to that little bit of good news, she had to find out that Gunn owed his soul to this guy.

Cordy gave Jenoff another disapproving look.

So here they were, at the casino. Unfortunately, it hadn't been a 'kill the bad guy and get away clean' kind of deal, but was it ever?

That still didn't justify Angel making the stupid double or nothing bet. Cordy wasn't quite sure she had heard right until she saw Angel sitting down at the black jack table along with the nasty demon and bets being placed all around her.

Had he really just wagered his soul on top of Gunn's in case he lost? Since when did Angel know anything about gambling and what hell beast was riding him to place such a bet?

The stake in her hand failed to give her the reassuring feeling she usually got from a pointy piece of wood.

What, how was she supposed to end it all in case it went bad because of Angel?

Cordelia just wanted to scream for a time out, right now, regroup, everybody back up a little, please. This was so not how her coming home was planned to be.

Apparently, for everyone else, this seemed to be the most normal thing to happen, judging from the eagerness in which bets were placed, it wasn't all that unusual.

She tried to focus, after all she had to be ready. For what, she wasn't sure, but it couldn't hurt to pay attention.

She got back to the task at hand just as Angel was turning his card. A 3. A 3?????

Wait, no, that meant... at that moment, all hell broke lose.

Cheers and curses were uttered all around her, Jenoff's lackeys were closing in on Gunn and Angel.

Suddenly, Cordy knew what to do: she dropped the stake and fished for the stun-gun in her purse.

She had taken one more look at Jenoff and knew he was absolutely going to go through with this and Angel seemed to be first.

She yelled at Fred to try to get Gunn to safety as her hands closed on the tazer, while taking a few steps into Jenoff's direction. But she couldn't pull the little device free fast enough, by the time she finally managed to get it out from under the crossbow and the rope, Jenoff's hands were on either side of Angel's head and a strange light formed around it.

Angel's eyes lit up in an unworldly fashion and a beam left his face to travel to Jenoff's.

From the corner of her eyes, Cordy could see Gunn and Fred trying to fight their way through a couple of muscle men, obviously on Jenoff's payroll. She couldn't help them right now.

Quickly realizing that it was too late to stop the soul transfer, if that was indeed what it was, Cordy decided that she wasn't going to take any chances.

Angel was already trying to break the grip the demons had on him, his shirt tearing in several places where their hands tried to hold on. She charged the stun-gun and jumped at Angel, the weapon in front of her. She could almost feel the shock of electricity hitting the vampire, but he seemed more surprised than hurt. She added another shock for good measure.

When she realized most of the casino guests were just bystanders, watching the action she had an idea:

"Hey!" She shouted, "Does anyone else owe this guy? Now's your chance!!"

Angel went down to the floor, apparently the third shock had done the job. Cordy wasn't quite sure the bystanders had caught her meaning and panicked for a moment, until she saw the mob move as one, closing in on Jenoff! It had worked!!

The bodyguards, who, moments before were only focused on keeping Angel in check, now left his side to assist their boss. It looked like a battle they were about to lose, but it would keep them busy.

Cordelia grabbed the unconscious vampire around the chest from behind and looked around for help. When did he become so heavy?

She noticed Gunn and Fred near the exit and just when she was about to get their attention, she noticed Gunn had his hands full with two of Jenoff's men.

Fred found a heavy ashtray that she swung at one of the demons, it connected with his head making a nasty sound and he went down. Gunn was about to get the upper hand with the other guy, when the demon flashed a knife, too fast for the former street fighter to see. Before he could disarm him, he had used his forward momentum to bury his knife into Gunn's thigh and he went down with a howl of pain.

Fred swung the ashtray column one more time and managed to at least disconnect the hand holding the knife from the weapon. Cordy had left Angel where he was, deciding that he wouldn't go anywhere this minute.

The whole room was utter chaos now, people and demons alike shouting, fighting or trying to escape. With a quick look around, Cordelia noticed that all other Jenoff employees were distracted. She charged her stun-gun on the way over and quickly rendered Gunn's attacker unconscious. Fred was by Gunn's side in a heartbeat. His face was distorted from the pain, his jeans were already red from the blood the gaping wound was oozing.

"Let's go. Now!!" Cordy yelled, running back to where Angel lay, still unconscious. She again placed her hands around his torso and dragged him towards the exit. Fred was helping Gunn up, they were ready to roll. She never knew how well her training with Angel would pay off, somehow she managed to drag the dark haired vampire all the way to their car without collapsing.

Fred helped Gunn into the passenger seat before yanking the back door open and helping Cordy drag Angel the last couple of steps. All they could think of was to leave this place as fast as possible. Fred jumped into the back seat and pulled Angel inside, while Cordy was pushing, barely placing his right foot inside, before slamming the door shut and rounding the car to take the driver's seat. It had been careless to leave the keys in the car in a place like this, but now she was grateful for it.

The engine started as soon as she turned the key and she set the car in motion. Gunn was moaning next to her as she ran over a bump in the lot.

"We have to get him to a hospital" Fred said from the back seat. It came out muffled because she was partially buried under the unconscious Angel.

"Yes, hospital," Cordy realized, of course.

Gunn seemed to be barely conscious himself, the blood already forming a puddle on the seat. Oh God, blood. Vampire. What if the smell of the blood would wake Angel up before she could get him out of here and safely determine whether he was Angelus or her friend?

"Fred, we so don't have time. I'm going to drop you guys off at the ER, do you think you can manage? I have to get Angel home before he comes to."

Fred suddenly realized that they were far from out of danger if Angel had indeed lost his soul. She quickly agreed and gave Cordy directions to the nearest hospital.

Barely missing a leaving ambulance, Cordelia pulled into the ER's driveway and jumped out of the car, grabbing the closest nurse, "We need help. He's bleeding. Bad. Please hurry."

Her quick, almost unconscious prayer must have been heard, she had obviously grabbed the right nurse. While she was still helping Fred to exit the car, a wheel chair was already set in motion and two more orderlies were helping Gunn into it.

"We catch up later", Cordelia yelled at Fred over her shoulder, already running around to the driver's side again.

"Get help!" was all Fred could yell back before Cordy started the engine.

Cordy was already pulling away when Fred reached the emergency room's doors behind Gunn's wheelchair. Only now did Fred's words register with Cordelia.

"Help? But who..." Wesley was in the hospital himself and Gunn was out of commission so that left..."The Slayer!! Buffy!" Cordy exclaimed, of course, who better to help with a probably lethal vampire! She was so preoccupied with what to do next that she hadn't time to realize the danger she was in, now all alone with a potential monster.

Luckily, she knew this area, trips to the hospital came with her job, and she knew the shortest way home. Rush hour was long over so she managed to get back to the hotel in fairly light traffic. Not a minute too soon, as she realized when she tried to pull Angel out of the car. He was already moaning when she dragged him toward the courtyard. With what she was sure was the rest of her strength, she dragged him through the front doors and the foyer. She only had a moment to come up with a place to put him for now, when she suddenly remembered the basement.

It was where she and Angel had sparred in better times, which seemed to be ages ago now. Back then, when Angel installed the restrains in the ceiling, she had raised her eyebrows at the thought of a violent demon chained up in the basement for questioning, it seemed so torture-y and Angelus-y, but now she was grateful Angel had gotten his will.

The chains had to be there still, surely not everything could have changed in two weeks. Once she reached the stairs, she couldn't hold Angel's still body before he tumbled down the steps. It was not how she had planned it, if anything could be called a plan, but he was downstairs and only steps away from the chains, which were indeed still firmly attached to the ceiling.

Sweating, she chained Angel's wrists into the steel cuffs. A quick glance confirmed that he was about to come to. Cordelia panicked before realizing she knew what to do. She ran back upstairs, into the office and almost knocked the phone of the desk while trying to grab it. It took her four tries before she had finally calmed down enough to dial the correct number. There was no way she could go into any details, so as soon as she had Buffy on the phone, she uttered three sentences that wouldn't have made sense to anybody else:

"Buffy, you need to come to LA, now. Angel may have lost his soul and I am all alone with him. Hurry and bring help!!"

She thanked the heavens for Buffy's sometimes quick mind. After only a spilt second's hesitation the slayer answered: "All the help we need is Willow to recast the spell! We'll be there as soon as we can, leaving now," and the connection went dead.

If Cordelia hadn't been standing right next to her desk, she would have collapsed on the floor. As it was, she almost broke the chair she fell into. Suddenly, all the terror of the last hour caught up with her and she was shaking all over. After a minute of catching her breath, she had one thought:

"I need a drink."

She wasn't a regular drinker, but all she could think of to calm her nerves right now was strong alcohol. She got up, crossed the room towards the bar and found what she was looking for: The full bottle of Tequila she had brought from Mexico. Had that really been only yesterday? Pushing that thought away, Cordelia poured herself a shot and downed it - it worked.

She filled the glass again and drank it as quickly as the first. As she could feel the burning liquid make its way down her throat into her empty stomach, she sensed the immediate panic leaving her. She took a couple of deep breaths until she felt she was ready to face reality. Well, as ready as she could possibly be, she figured.

"Well, what's it going to be, ladies and gentleman, handsome dark avenger, the helper in need or the Scourge of Europe?" she mumbled as she opened the door to the basement and took the steps downstairs.

All hopes that Angel was still out were quickly destroyed when the vampire lifted his head as he heard her on the steps. Cordy took one look at him and couldn't help but wonder if he had known what was going to happen. When was the last time he had worn those sexy leather pants and tight shirt? `Oh God, that must be the tequila talking!' she thought when she realized what directions her thoughts were going.

Angel's shirt was torn in so many places, it barely resembled a piece of clothing. Cordy took it all in, her wandering eyes not noticing how the vampire had caught her look. She was looking for something, anything to give her a clue of which version of tall dark and handsome she was dealing with.

"If you like what you see, wait till you feel the touch, I promise you won't be disappointed."

Cordelia almost jumped at his voice which shattered the silence of the last minutes.

"Angelus, then," she answered her own question under her breath. One look into his eyes confirmed her suspicion. She was quite sure she would have noticed if her friend had ever tried to undress her with his look before, she quickly came back to her senses though.

"You better think twice about everything you say. The Slayer is on her way here and whatever you express right now may come back to haunt you."

Now, that the moment she had feared was here, Cordelia found she was calmer than she had expected.

Angelus, the mere thought of him had her scared until today. Seeing him now, smiling seductively at her, chained to the ceiling, she felt stronger and more in control than she had imagined.

"Is that so?" he whispered dangerously, one eyebrow raised.

"Yes, that is indeed so. You will have your soul back in no time and will regret anything you say now!"

"Anything?", he asked, not covering the humor in his voice. "You don't mean everything?" Chuckling under his unneeded breath she could sense he was far from finished.

She tried to silence him with a cold stare but she realized all her weapons against Angel were useless on Angelus.

"Like if I started pointing out the obvious? How you ran off with the Magnificently Stupid One to a getaway that could have been the shag of a lifetime? The same shag-fest that has him running into the arms of a sect just to get away from you? I have to give it to you, Cor, you sure know how to lose your men!"

Clearly, Angelus was warming up to the subject, instinctively sensing her weak spot. Cordy willed herself not to participate in this lame game and, taking a calming deep breath she sat down on a chair facing Angel, but Angelus wasn't discouraged that easily.

"Whatsa matter? Big Bulgy didn't have it in him to satisfy the spoilt May Queen? Your infatuation, dare I call it love, going up in smoke?" his voice was now dripping with sarcasm. "Poor Cor, must have left you just as horny as before with no one to fuck. Should have been more careful in your choice of a champion."

That did it, Cordelia jumped up from the chair, two could play that game! Carefully avoiding Angelus' reach, she walked around him to stand directly behind his back. She leaned forward to place her mouth directly next to his ear, aware of the fact that he could sense her warmth, her pulsing blood and the embodiment of everything a vampire could want.

"Well," she whispered, intentionally letting her breath flow over his skin "If it wasn't for the fact that you're a eunuch," she tried to put disgust into the last word "every other male in town just being after my life or impregnating me with his demon spawn, I wouldn't have to go looking for a lover in another dimension!"

A quick glance at Angelus tensed face confirmed she was having the desired effect.

She moved in for the kill, "I could have had everything right here, but no, Mr. Big Fat Hero isn't into helping girls that way!" Angelus' body's reaction wasn't lost on her, "Until now, apparently," she added, after realizing his leather pants must be getting uncomfortable right about now.

Angelus recovered a little faster than she would have expected but Cordy managed to hide her surprise as he replied, "Well then, what are you waiting for? Untie me and let me help you. I know you need my help and a little distraction after all the chaos you caused. If you hadn't run off to Mexico with your loser, none of this shit would have happened."

Cordelia was glad his words enraged her, otherwise she would have had to find harder to resist the longing his deep, sensual voice sparked in her. But he had put his finger on her sore spot, she had accused herself of the same. It was all her fault, Wesley, Connor, all on her conscience, but she couldn't let the demon win this game.

"Some hero you are. Lose the only son you'll ever have and all you can think of is sex!"

She was facing him now from a safe distance so he could see the fire in her eyes. What she could have hidden from human senses was clearly picked up by Angelus' vampire senses. Her quickened heart beat, her nervous breathing, the arousal building between her legs. Nothing escaped the demon, but he could play along.

"You know, I'm glad the little squaller is gone for good. As far as I'm concerned, taking care of the squealing rugrat for all eternity is poetic justice, and I'm glad Holtz is the one receiving it! if that's what he wanted. Personally, I can think of more humane ways of torture. At least now I have time for all the pleasures in life again." He let his eyes wander over Cordelia's breasts as he spoke.

Cordelia was clearly struggling for composure, hating her body for reacting in such a way to him. She took a deep breath and tabbed into her bitch resource, kept strictly for situations that threatened to get out of her hands. "Ugh, now I'm too grossed out to think straight" she let he body shiver from what she hoped looked like disgust, "You know what, I have the cure for all your pains!" A bright smile spread across her face. "Once you are a real eunuch, you may find it easier to concentrate on the important issues in life!"

With a look at Angelus' clearly bulging crotch she made her ultimate threat, "What's it going to be, ax or dagger? I'll give you the choice of weapons I'm going to maim you with."

But Angelus' was chuckling, "Oh, Cor, we both know you wouldn't do anything of that sort. I know you want me. Everybody knows you want me." At the look of surprise on her face at his words, he added acidly "Hey, no need to act surprised. When you turned that dickhead into a clone of me, right down to my underwear, your intentions were quite obvious for all the world to see!"

Cordelia's sense of battle was on. No way was she going to let him get to her without fighting back. She was no whiny crybaby he could have his way with. Once again carefully inching closer to him, she bent down. Angel watched her with unhidden interest, clearly enjoying himself. She reached out, as if to cup his manhood, caressing the leather over the bulge so slightly that Angelus could barely sense it. He was on fire.

"What do you think, should we put it in alcohol afterwards, to preserve it for all eternity like you? I'm sure Fred could come up with a concoction that would keep it fresh indefinitely, enabling you to have deep, meaningful conversations with 'him' at bedtime."

Before Angelus could move in, Cordelia took a step back. She was just getting started.

"Just think of all the things you can't do you could tell him about."

Angelus was not threatened by her words, still not believing she would do anything so drastic, but he was warming up to the whole encounter. He wanted her to touch him again. The air in the basement was thick with tension as both contemplated their next move.

When the shrill ring of the phone interrupted, Cordelia almost jumped. Angelus only smiled, his eyes never leaving Cordelia's. Suddenly, Cordelia was thankful for the interruption and ran up the stairs, slamming the door behind her.

What she hadn't noticed, when Angelus had tried to lunge at her before, was, that one of the chains seemed to give more than the other. Angelus had noticed the fine sprinkle of plaster that rained down on him after his move. With her gone, he had all the time he needed to explore just how much the iron embedded into the ceiling would give.

Cordelia reached the phone on its third ring. She wasn't surprised to hear Fred's voice on the other end, although she realized she hadn't wasted too much time worrying about the two, having had her hands full with the dark-haired vampire. Fred quickly filled her in on Gunn's condition, he was still in surgery, but the doctors were hopeful. If everything went well, a couple of stitches would be all he needed and Gunn would have an impressive scar left he could show off later, but now permanent damage.

Cordelia breathed a sigh of relief. Good news, finally.

"How's Angel?" Fred now changed the subject.

Cordelia quickly decided not to worry Fred more than she already was, she wanted her to stay at the hospital to take care of Gunn.

"I have everything under control" she told Fred with what she hoped was confidence in her voice. "I called Buffy and Willow in Sunnydale, they'll be here shortly and will provide all the help I could ask for!"

That seemed to calm Fred. After reassuring the former physicist that she would be fine until reinforcements arrived and that Fred should be there when Gunn woke up from surgery, Fred seemed to agree. Cordelia figured she had told Fred exactly what the girl had wanted to hear, she didn't want her to feel guilty for leaving Cordy alone with Angelus. She hung up after Fred had promised to check in later. She needed a minute to gather her thoughts to come up with a next step. She figured it would be at least another hour before Buffy and Willow arrived and she needed to manage on her own until then.

Her first instinct was to go back downstairs but then she realized she had had enough humiliation for the time being. Angelus' words had hit her a lot deeper than she had let on, he had voiced everything that had been torturing her for weeks. How did the vampire know so much about her? Groo was a charming idiot, but all the tequila in the world couldn't persuade her that he was the champion she wanted. She had tried, telling herself that Groo was everything a girl could ask for, but it hadn't worked.

Just hearing Angel's voice made her realize exactly what she had been missing. And Connor - how could she have been so careless, leaving the group on their own, dismissing all concerns for them in her quest to finally quench some of her bodily desires? None of this would have happened if she had been here. She was unable to think of a single satisfactory excuse for her behavior, so she settled for numbing her nagging thoughts for now, helping herself to another drink. After all, wasn't it Angel himself who had all but sent her away? He had practically shoved her out the door, placing the wad of cash into her hand and obviously completely unfazed by her attraction to Groo. At that moment, Cordelia had been sure Angel's feelings for her would never grow beyond friendship, `You wouldn't send a friend on a semi-honeymoon with a stand-in if you had any romantic feelings for them, right?'

Downing the rest of her second drink, Cordelia couldn't help but wonder though. From the moment Angelus had laid eyes on her, his taunting words seemed to be going into only one direction: Sex with her. Was it your standard demon-horniness or was there more after all? Could it be Angelus wanted her in a way Cordelia hadn't imagined before? Just thinking of their encounter only minutes ago, she felt a tingling sensation forming in her stomach and travelling down. Nope, that can't be the alcohol itself, she felt desire. Ugh, she wanted a vampire? She, who had dismissed Angel as soon as she had found out he was a demon all those years ago? It couldn't be! But his eyes, his voice, Cordelia couldn't come up with a single man that had ever been more attractive to her. She was deeply disturbed by her thoughts, she had never thought of her friend this way consciously. Sure, he was handsome, but she had never allowed herself to focus on his physical attraction. Now she didn't seem to be able to think of him in any other way!

"Oh no," she scowled herself, realization dawning on her "So not going down the Buffy-Road!!"

She wondered if going back downstairs, to find out if it wasn't the combination of alcohol, life-threatening situations and the grief over Connor and Groo, that had her mind confused, was the thing to do now, but catching her reflection in the mirror across the room from the bar convinced her otherwise. She was a mess. Her short hair was sticking out in spikes from her head, her eyes looked tired. Her shirt was covered in now dry blood and dirt. Cordelia decided that a long, hot shower was just what the doctor would order right now. She hoped it would bring her back to her senses! Determined, she walked up the stairs to the shower in Angel's room.




Next Chapter