SUMMARY: First season Buffy meets fifth season Buffy.
RATING: PG
DISCLAIMER: Not my Buffys.
Ether After
by Rebecca Carefoot
The Master taunted her; his voice low, soft against her ear. "If you hadn't come, I couldn't go." She'd sacrificed her life, done what she'd had to do, been brave. She was going to die. And if she'd run, if she'd quit like she'd wanted to, the Master would have stayed trapped. A tear slid down her cheek. But she was otherwise completely still. She could not move as he lowered his teeth to her neck and bit. Pain. Searing pain. She could dimly hear him past the grey veil that lowered over her vision, exhulting at the power, breaking free. And everything was dark.
Buffy opened her eyes with a start, and saw white. Just white. Endless. She waved a hand in front of her face to make sure she wasn't some funky form of blind. Nope. This place was just really, really white. She turned her head, then stood up. She slowly rotated, studying the place with curiousity. White, white, and wait a second. Her gaze fell on a huddled figure several feet away. She thought about it for a second, then shrugged and headed over to the figure. It wasn't like there was anything else to do.
She knelt down beside the girl, and brushed her long hair back from her face. Then she pulled back, her mouth a surprised O. The girl opened her eyes, then narrowed them.
"Who are you?" Buffy asked.
"Can't you tell?" the girl answered. "I'm you." She took in Buffy's white Spring Fling dress, and heels. "Only later."
"Huh?" Buffy said. She studied the girl. "If you're me, and I'm me, then how can we both be here at the same time?"
"I'm guessing time exists differently here, if it exists at all."
"And here would be..." Buffy prompted.
"What's the last thing you remember?" the older Buffy asked.
Buffy shivered, shrinking in on herself slightly. "The Master," she said, her voice small.
"Exactly," the other girl said. "I think you know where we are."
"But that means..." Buffy said, her brow wrinkling. "Uh... How could I die twice? I mean, that IS why you're here isn't it?"
The other girl opened her mouth, then closed it. "I think we'd both be better off if we don't go there. I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to know your future."
"Well, that last prophecy sure as hell didn't help anything," Buffy said a little spitefully. "Who writes that stuff? Why can't they just be clear? Date, year, time, name, and a couple concise directions. Would have saved me some trouble." She frowned suddenly, and stamped her heeled foot hard against the ground. "Damn it. The Master's out, and my friends are down there. I should be with them. I should be fighting." She gritted her teeth. "This sucks."
She looked at the older Buffy. "What about you? Aren't you mad?"
"Mostly," her counterpart answered. "I'm just tired." Buffy looked at her more closely. She was thin. But really thin, gaunt even. Like she'd been stretched too far. Her eyes were dark, haunted, exhausted. Dark circles sat under them like bruises. Her cheeks were white, bloodless. Her shoulders stooped.
"What happened to you?" Buffy blurted. "You look awful."
The girl gave her a half smile. "Thanks." She sighed. "I thought we agreed, no telling you."
"This can't be," Buffy said. "I mean, this can't be me. Like, what I'll become." Her eyes widened as she realized what she'd said. "No offense or anything," she quickly added. "But you look like..." She trailed off. "Never mind."
"What?" the other Buffy asked. "Like hell?"
"I was going to say, you look...defeated," Buffy answered. She frowned suddenly. "I guess I shouldn't talk. Look how great I did against the Master." She scuffed her toe against the ground. "I can't believe how stupid I was walking in there. And why didn't anyone tell me he could hypnotize me? Maybe if I'd known. God. Who am I kidding? He was way out of my league."
The older Buffy cocked her head. Then she smiled, her first real smile, and shook her head. "Nah. You competely outclass that loser."
Buffy grinned. "You really think so?"
"I know so."
"Hey," Buffy said. "I thought you decided no telling me what's to come."
"Believe me," the other Buffy said. "You don't want to know what's to come."
"I guess you're right," Buffy said, taking another look at her own face. Her face after facing who knew how many battles. After who knew how many sacrifices and losses. Her face. And not her face. Her eyes, only they were almost empty. She shivered, her throat tight. "Maybe it's better that I died," she said. "I mean, this place isn't that bad." And it can't be worse than whatever made your eyes so empty, she added silently.
The other Buffy shook her head. "Nah. You don't belong here. You've still got stuff to do. Like kick the Master's ass for one. And you know, keep the world from ending."
Buffy grinned. "You're really sure I can? Beat him, I mean."
The other Buffy flashed white teeth in a wide smile. "He'll never even see it coming."
Buffy looked up as she heard male voices fade in and out. "...have to do it....no breath." Angel. She smiled, and saw the recognition in the older Buffy's eyes. Recognition, love, and...pain. Her heart suddenly felt icy, her skin crawling, as she wondered again what was to come.
"One. Two." Xander. CPR. She met her own eyes one last time.
"So I guess," she said uncertainly. "This is... Okay. I have no idea. Not really good-bye I suppose."
"Just for now," the other Buffy said. "Hey. Kill him good."
Buffy nodded, and for a second everything went black. Then Buffy's eyes flew open; she was looking into Xander's face and air rushed into her aching lungs.
end
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