Quotes

"Redefinition"

Written by: Mere Smith
Quote List compiled by: AnGeL X

Cordelia: What just happened? Can someone explain to me what just happened here?
Wesley: I believe we were fired.
Gunn: Canned.
Wesley: Let go.
Gunn: Axed.
Wesley: Shown the door.
Gunn: Booted.
Cordelia: All right! I get it. But what just happened?

Cordelia: One thing you can say about Angel, at least he's consistent. It's always some little blonde driving him over the edge.

Gunn: Hey, this was a side gig for me. The extra cash was nice while it lasted, but Angel wants to go all commando? No skin off my nose.
Cordelia: Well, my nose skin is angry. And hurt.

Angel: I'm not ready yet. Too many years spent sleeping in soft beds, living in a world where don't belong. I can't fight them. Not yet. But soon.

Lindsey: I'm the only one left.
Cororner: Hey, we got a live one here!
Lindsey: We do?

Virginia: He fired you? He can't fire you. You're on a mission to protect the innocent. You can't fire someone on a mission. What did he say exactly?
Wesley: "You're fired."
Virginia: Oh.

Wesley: Your father tried to sacrifice you to the Goddess Yeska.
Virginia: Yes. One of the many reasons I'll never talk to him again... although I am healing now thanks to a lot of therapy and a gigantic trust fund.

Lilah: Oh, what's wrong, Lindsey? You bitter because your girlfriend didn't slit my throat?
Lindsey: "Bitter" might be overstating it. More like "bummed."

Lindsey: We did nothing wrong.
Lilah: I'm sorry, have we met? Because I work for Wolfram and Hart. Responsibility has nothing to do with it. If they're looking for a scapegoat, we might as well grow horns and start eating garbage.

Drusilla: He's got cow-eyes, big and black... Moooooooo...

Lindsey: Why did you spare me, Darla?
Darla: Do you really have to ask? I'm in love with you.
(Ladies laugh, including Lilah)
Darla: Shut up, Lilah.
Drusilla: Shhhh.

Lindsey: You've put us in a difficult position, Darla.
Darla: Have I? Smart young lawyers, hungry for their big break... and whoops! The boss gets eaten. Somebody's gotta step in. Someone promising, pretty, with questionable ethics, and $1200 suits that look good on the 6 o'clock news.

Lindsey: What is it exactly that you want, Darla?
Darla: Power. See Lindsey, during my stint as Wolfram and Hart's puppet, something occurred to me. I loathe being used. As I recall, I sent you a 15-body memo to that effect.

Darla: I spent two hundred and fifty years without Angel. You think just because I went through a little "human" phase, I'd go all gooey?
Lindsey: No. No, I thought you'd kill him.

Wesley: A Bloody Mary, please.
Bartender: You want real blood with that?
Wesley: Uh... no. Bloodless. Thanks.

Cordelia: Oh, uh well... I was, um, in the neighborhood.
Wesley: You live fifteen miles away.
Cordelia: Well, you know L.A. It's all one really... big... neighborhood.

Cordelia: Well, I, for one, would just like to point out the patheticness that is us. Goodbye A-Team, hello Suck Team. This is all Angel's fault. I hope he's happy now, all alone in his demon world with no one to talk to.

Merl: I heard about your girls, Godzilla, Darcilla, whatever. They been hittin' all the underground hotspots, lookin' for demons to join some... crew they're running. That's all I know, man, I swear.

Merl: Hey, hey, hey! You're gonna cut me down, right? You're not just gonna leave me hanging here man...hey! Hey! I'm spinning here, man! Freakin' vampires.

Darla: My name is Darla, and this is Drusilla. We're new in town, though some of you may know us by reputation.
Demon: I ain't ever heard of ya.
(Drusilla rips the demon's ears off)
Darla: Now you never will.

Darla: Me and my girl, we're not just the new thing in town, we're the only thing in town. And we're in the market for some... well, one doesn't really want to use the term "muscular slaves"... Actually, one does.

Lilah: One of us is going to die, Lindsey.
Lindsey: Everybody dies, Lilah.
Lilah: But not everybody ends up in a dog food processing plant in San Pedro.

Cordelia: But see? That's what I'm saying. If Wesley hadn't been all shaking-his-finger and no-no-no, this whole Darla thing would have just... you know, blown over.
Wesley: What? Blown over? Angel is obsessed with Darla. Obsessions don't just... blow over.

Gunn: I don't know. If I had to listen to you two, day in, day out, snipe snipe snipe, bitch bitch bitch... I figure ya'll got off easy cause I woulda killed you.
Cordelia: Oh, that's rich, coming from Mr. I-Don't-Take-Orders-Now-Where-Do-I-Stick-My-Axe.

Gunn: Was one of his directives "Hire pansy ass British guy?"
Wesley: My ass is not pansy!
Gunn: And what about her? Maybe if she'd had a few more visions, Angel woulda been too distracted to think about this Darla chick, hm.
Cordelia: Earth to retards! You have an obsession, you pretty much squeeze it into your schedule no matter what.
Wesley: A ha! So you admit it's an obsession?
Cordelia: No! I mean, yes, but... no!
Wesley: Hypocrite!
Cordelia: Ass pansy!

Cordelia: Vampires... sloth demons... you know what's really, really evil? Tequila.

Wesley: I need to be dead now.

The Host: I was very impressed with your musical recitation of pain earlier. And when I say "pain," I mean mine. Although props for singing your little hearts out. Cordelia: Yeah, our hearts were out and you, Mr. Big Mojo Guy, are s'posed to give us guidance now.
Wesley: She's right. We came, we sang, we... (swallows) fought the urge to regurgitate.

Cordelia: So spill already. (to Wes) Not you.

Wesley We start with basics. First, we examine the area for any tell-tale signs of a particular kind of...Yeuggh.
Gunn: There's different kinds of "yeuggh?"

Drusilla: I didn't like that barkeeper. I can't get his eyes off my fingers.

Drusilla: You miss him. Like a heartbeat. Darla: I don't miss my heartbeat, Dru. It was a symptom of a disease I've since been cured of.

Darla: You know, in a perfect world, Angel would be here right now, helping me burn this city to the ground. This is his job I'm doing. But where is he? Probably flogging himself in a church somewhere.
Drusilla: Ooh. Flogging. Ooh. Churches.

Cordelia: Ugh. Always the same. A smelly, old abandoned building. Are there no demon hide-outs in Beverly Hills?

Wesley: We need to get her to a hospital.
Cordelia: Yeah.
Gunn: What about you?
Wesley: I'm fine, just a... we should leave before I pass out. Or possibly during.
Gunn: This thing just about ripped us to shreds.
Cordelia: Yeah, but out of everybody here, which one of us is the dead one?

Drusilla: Ten little soldiers all in a line... A shot rings out... (clap) Down to nine.
Darla: Ten? I'll be happy if we find three who can hack it.

Drusilla: Dead already? Bad soliders.

Darla: That wasn't Angel.
Drusilla: He's gone! He's all gone! Oh, it hurts... it hurts...
Darla: Wasn't Angelus, either.
Drusilla: Help me...
Darla: Who was that?

Hunt Acrey: And as for your relationship to on another: your competition is vicious, destructive... and healthy. We think you keep each other on your toes.

Wesley: I thought you might like to know we're keeping the agency open...with or without you. You may have turned you back on your mission, but we haven't. Someone has to fight the good fight.
Angel: Let them fight the good fight. Someone has to fight the war.

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