DEMON TEEN: Geez. What is the holdup?

DAWN: Can you keep a secret? Nobody knows this, but the groom? He took off and no one can find him.

ANYA: (overhearing) What?

DAWN: (uh-oh) Um...

DEMON TEEN: I'll catch you later, Dawn.

ANYA: Xander's gone? Xander is missing? (loudly) What do you mean Xander's missing?!

(everyone hears her)

UNCLE RORY: (chuckles) It's a joke. Xander's playing a joke. It's like one time, at one of Carol's weddings, I had this ape suit-

TENTACLE DEMON: Oh, great.

UNCLE RORY: -and I put it on-

TENTACLE DEMON: Another Harris family joke. (to Mr. Harris) Why don't *you* have another drink?

MR. HARRIS: (slurred) Drinking ... is the only way I can dull the pain ... of looking at your ugly face.

TENTACLE DEMON: You better think real hard about this, Harris.

MR. HARRIS: Don't touch me with those nasty circus things!

TENTACLE DEMON: That's it!

(brawl ensues)

written by: Rebecca Kirshner; transcribed by Joan the English Chick (pisces@englishchick.com). action descriptions edited by me. . Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/116hellsbells.html