BUFFY: Uh ... we missed the bed again.

SPIKE: Lucky for the bed.

BUFFY: Is this a new rug?

SPIKE: Mm...no. Just looks different when you're under it.

BUFFY: You know, this place is okay for a hole in the ground. You fixed it up.

SPIKE: Well, I ate a decorator once. Maybe something stuck.

BUFFY: I've been thinking about doing something to my room.

SPIKE: Yeah?

BUFFY: Yeah, I think the New Kids On The Block posters are starting to date me.

SPIKE: (chuckles) Well, if you want, I can... (surprised) Are we having a conversation?

BUFFY: What? No! No. (pause) Maybe.

SPIKE: Hmm.

BUFFY: What?

SPIKE: Well, isn't this usually the part where you ... kick me in the head and run out, virtue fluttering?

BUFFY: That's the plan ... (embarrassed) ...soon as my legs start working.

SPIKE: (whispers) You were amazing.

BUFFY: (softly) You got the job done yourself.

SPIKE: I was just trying to keep up. The things you do ... ...the way you make it hurt in all the wrong places. I've never been with such an animal.

BUFFY: I'm not an animal.

SPIKE: You wanna see the bite marks?

BUFFY: You know, it's late, I-I should ... get home before Dawn goes to sleep.

SPIKE: And she's off.

BUFFY: Have you seen my underwear?

SPIKE: (sighs) What is this to you? This thing we have.

BUFFY: We don't have a ... thing, we have ... this. That's all.

SPIKE: Do you even like me?

BUFFY: (softly) Sometimes.

SPIKE: But you like what I do to you.

SPIKE: (dangling hand-cuffs) Do you trust me?

BUFFY: Never.

• Buffy & Spike

written by: Steven S. DeKnight; transcribed by Joan the English Chick (pisces@englishchick.com). . Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/113deadthings.html