(Bronze. Buffy arrives alone, and sees no familiar faces at first.)

XANDER: The whole world in front of her, and she comes back to this dive.

BUFFY: Xander!

(She gives him a one-armed hug.)

XANDER: Hey, Buff.

BUFFY: Oh, when did you get back?

XANDER: Couple days ago.

BUFFY: You freak of nature. Why didn't you call me?

XANDER: Well I knew you guys were starting the whole college adventure and I didn't want to, um, you know... help you move.

BUFFY: I missed you. How was your trip? Is America nice? I hear it's nice.

XANDER: There's some purple mountains majesty, I'm gonna have to say.

BUFFY: What'd you do? What'd you see?

XANDER: Well...

BUFFY: Tell me!

XANDER: 'Grand Canyon!'

BUFFY: You saw the Grand Canyon!

XANDER: Well, I saw the movie 'Grand Canyon,' on cable. Really lame.

BUFFY: Hunh?

XANDER: Basically, I got as far as Oxnard and the engine fell out of my car, and that was literally. So, I ended up washing dishes at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club' for about a month and a half while I tried to pay for the repairs. No one really bothered me or even spoke to me until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say I traded my car in for one that wasn't entirely made of rust, came trundling back home to the arms of my loving parents, where everything was exactly as it was except I sleep in the basement and I have to pay rent. How's college?

BUFFY: Male strippers?

XANDER: No power on this earth!

• Funnies

written by: Joss Whedon; Transcribed by: Diov Llun . Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/57freshman.html