BUFFY: Not late. Not late 'til the bell rings. (seea two boys fighting) Hey! Hey! Break it up! (bell rings) Get to class. (they go separate ways;) Uh-oh. (a girl is fading away in front of the lockers, Buffy goes up to her) Hey, shy girl, don't do this. Oh... (Buffy slaps the girl)

SHY GIRL: You knew I was there!

BUFFY: Yeah.

SHY GIRL: You noticed me.

BUFFY: It's OK, I promise. It may seem ba? (a girl comes out of the bathroom beside the lockers where Buffy's standing) Wh-wh-what's wrong?

CRYING GIRL: The mirror said I was fat. It said it. (walks off crying)

STRESSED OUT BOY: I'm so?I can't take this semester anymore. It's just so much for me to handle. So, not only does Mr. Hildebrand move up the trig exam to today, but he also makes it cover three more chapters. And I've got an English paper due tomorrow. I feel like I'm gonna explode.

BUFFY: Hey, uh, I can help. You just need to relax, you know? (to his friends) You know, um, maybe one of you guys could give him a foot rub?

STRESSED OUT BOY: What?

(cut to Buffy entering the administrative office)

BUFFY: Something bad is going on.

ROBIN WOOD: Oh, is that right?

BUFFY: Ooh, you're hurt. What happened?

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Someone threw a rock at me as I got out of my car. I didn't really get a good chance to see who.

BUFFY: Yeah, well, it could have been any of them. Students, teachers?something is going on today.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Yes, well, um, that occurred to me as I ducked the other two rocks. Buffy, what the hell is this?

BUFFY: (helping bandage him) Everything.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Slowly, I may be concussed here.

BUFFY: There this thing that happens here, in this school, over the hell mouth. Where the way a thing feels?it kind of starts being that way...for real. I've seen all these things before...just not all at once.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: So, what, it's like hell's a bustin' out all over?

BUFFY: Exactly.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: So, what's the worst that can happen?

BUFFY: War, pretty much.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Oh, I see you're being amusing now with comical exaggeration.

BUFFY: Being in high school can feel like being at war. Now it's true. The students feel like the teachers are out to get them. The Chess Club resents the French Club for taking the activities room, and, well, everybody hates the cheerleaders. If we don't do something about this, we're gonna have a riot on our hands. And a lot of other nasty stuff too.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Like what?

(A boy in the hallway screams, increasingly louder, until he explodes off screen, leaving bloody residue splattered all over the outside of the office window.)

BUFFY: Really should have had that foot rub.

(...later...)

PRINCIPAL WOOD: You've dealt with this before? I mean, you've seen stuff like this in a high school?

BUFFY: Sure, you know, swim team monsters or killer prom dogs. Again, not all at once.

PRINCIPAL WOOD: So, what makes now so special?

BUFFY: My guess?it's that seal thing in the basement. It's like all the hellmouth's energy is trying to escape in that one little spot, and it's getting all?

PRINCIPAL WOOD: Focusy.

BUFFY: Careful. You're starting to speak like me now.

• Buffy & Principal Wood

written by: Jane Espenson; originally transcribed by: CariCranberry. edited by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/buffy/season7/transcripts/138_tran.php