LORNE: (To bartender in Caritas) I don't care. Substitute it with something. Be creative. I know you can. (To Angel) Can you believe this? Not even ten o'clock and we've already run out of yak's bile.

ANGEL: We need to talk.

LORNE: And you should have booked in advance. I don't think we can get you on stage tonight.

ANGEL: I'm not here to sing.

LORNE: Oh, is that what we're calling it now?

ANGEL: Something's coming.

LORNE: Really? I thought it was just the complimentary nachos bringing in the morally ambiguous crowd.

ANGEL: (Turns to see Caritas packed with humans in business suits) Lawyers.

LORNE: Easy, big fella. I know what you're thinking. And the throwing yourself across six tables and twisting the head off their their necks part? Not a good idea.

ANGEL: You've read them. You've seen it. You know what's coming.

LORNE: Now, Angel-cakes, you wouldn't appreciate it if I were to blab your personal stuff to every Tom, Dick and vampire that walked in the door, would you?

ANGEL: Is it bad?

LORNE: Oy. But I really can't divulge to you what I read in another being. - But I can tell you what I overheard in the men's restroom. It's coming Friday. And it's got all their legal briefs in a twist about it.

ANGEL: What?

LORNE: Well, about every seventy-five years your friends over at Wolfram and Hart have this review. I think the general angst isn't so much about the review, but more about the reviewer. And let's just say it ain't Rex Reed.

ANGEL: What is it?

LORNE: It's evil. It's dark. It's merciless. Actually, now that I say it out loud it sounds an awful lot like Rex, doesn't it?

ANGEL: Maybe you could just tell me in one word what it is.

LORNE: Not likely. But I *can* tell you in two: Senior. Partner.

• Angel & Lorne (the Host)
• Caritas/Karaoke
• Wolfram & Hart

written by: Tim Minear; Original transcript anonymous. Edited, formatted for this site and checked against source by Sylvia.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season2/transcripts/37_tran.shtml