HAROLD: I really need some help. They say he handles things. You know, unusual things. I'd like to see him right away.

CORDELIA: And he wants to see you, just as soon as he returns from an important case. Why don't I take a preliminary report and give you a list of our convenient payment plans.

HAROLD: Well, it's my wife, Claire, she's really a lovely...

WESLEY: Go on, it's all right.

HAROLD: She gets abducted by aliens, on a regular basis.

WESLEY: Aliens?

CORDELIA: From outer space?

HAROLD: It's more common than people realize - one minute she's there and the next - she always comes back in a day or so.

WESLEY: What is it you'd like us to do, Mr. Jeakins?

HAROLD: I trust Claire - but I found this receipt from the Franklin Hotel, weekend before last when she was supposed to be in the Trifid Nebula!

CORDELIA: I'm sure we can get to the bottom of this.

HAROLD: I mean if it's not aliens... (spots Angel arriving; to Wes) Is that? (Wes knods)

CORDELIA: Mr. Jeakins, say hello to your new best friend.

HAROLD: Do you think my wife's cheating on me?

ANGEL: (keeps walking) Probably.

CORDELIA: Oh, he really likes you, he's jumping right in.

HAROLD: He's taking...? He didn't seem that...

WESLEY: (ushering Harold out) Oh, he's aneccentric, all the great ones are. Sherlock Holmes, Phillip Marlowe...

HAROLD: Those are fictional characters.

WESLEY: Yes, right you are! Which gives Angel rather a leg up when you come to think of it.

• Funnies

written by: David Greenwalt; Originally transcribed by anonymous. Edited, formatted, and checked against source by me.. Full transcript at:
http://ww3.buffy-vs-angel.com/angel_tran_27.shtml