SPIKE: (searching Spike's apartment) If I was a ring, where would I be? Well, this is fun. But it?s going to get old real fast.

(...)

CORDELIA: When you?re through giving the place the full Johnny-Depp-over, I hope you have the cash to pay for all of this.

SPIKE: Cordelia. Love the hair.

CORDELIA: Wish I could say the same to you.

DOYLE: That?s close enough, dimwit.

SPIKE: What is it with you good guys running in packs? Who is this one then?

DOYLE: More than meets the eye, blondie.

SPIKE: Ooo, the Mick?s got spine! Maybe I?ll snap it in two.

CORDELIA: Do you want me to use this?

SPIKE: You?ll be dead before that arrow leaves the bow. (Cordelia lowers the crossbow slightly) Now where was I? Bloody tired of looking for that ring. I think you two should take over now.

DOYLE: Where?s Angel?

SPIKE: Um...tall brooding guy, caveman brow? He?s having the living hell tortured out of him. And you know how stubborn he can be, he might die before he gives up the ring. Why don?t you two find it real fast and give it to me? I?ll let Angel go.

CORDELIA: I don?t trust you.

SPIKE: To coin a popular Sunnydale phrase: duh. But you have until sundown to save him. You?ll find me behind Peterson?s Fishery between Seward and Westminster. Don?t be late.

written by: Douglas Petrie; Originally transcribed by anonymous. Edited, formatted for this site and checked by M'lyn.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season1/transcripts/03_tran.shtml