ANDREW: (reading) "Getting the most out of your new microwave." Hm. Nice. "Clock comma setting the, page 3."

JONATHAN/FIRST: You don't need a manual, it's intuitive. There's a button marked "Clock Set" for pity's sake. What kind of a nerd are you? No wonder you crashed your jet pack.

ANDREW: No, get thee behind me. (takes a cross out of his jeans pocket) I rebuke thee. Take that, The First!

JONATHAN/FIRST: Look, you monkey. (walks up to Andrew, sticks out his hand and passes through the cross) Ooh. Ahh. It burns as it ineffectually passes through me. I'm not corporeal, remember? Also, not a vampire, so?a cross?

ANDREW: What do you want from me, Jonathan slash The First?

JONATHAN/FIRST: I have an assignment for you.

ANDREW: Um, I follow Buffy's orders now. I'm redeeming myself for... killing you?I mean, for... killing Jonathan.

JONATHAN/FIRST: Really, why? So you can earn a spot on her little pep squad? You think she'll ever let you in? You're a murderer.

ANDREW: Confidentially, a lot of her people are murderers. Anya and Willow and Spike.

JONATHAN/FIRST: Interesting. And you're the only one she makes seek redemption. Does that seem fair to you?

ANDREW: (squirms) I guess not.

JONATHAN/FIRST: You know we're headed toward a fight, don't you?

ANDREW: Yeah.

JONATHAN/FIRST: What do you think the world's gonna be like after that? Newsflash. There's not going to be a slayer gang anymore. But there is going to be Evil. And as long as there is Evil, I live. And as long as I live, you can dwell at my side.

ANDREW: That sounds nice.

JONATHAN/FIRST: Your assignment won't be hard. They're just little girls.

ANDREW: You want me to hurt the girls?

JONATHAN/FIRST: Uh, no, not all of them. Not Dawn, not Anya, not Willow, and not your friend Buffy. Just the potential slayers.

ANDREW: That's?that's horrible. I'm-I'm gonna scream and?and get Buffy in here.

JONATHAN/FIRST: She can't see me, and I'm gonna keep talking until you hear what I have to say, so listen up, OK? The girls must die.

ANDREW: I could never do that. All those girls, a-all that blood?I-I didn't like the stabbing before.

JONATHAN/FIRST: You don't have to stab. This'll be easy. Andrew, I want you to think. Willow brought something to this house?something good, something you can use.

ANDREW: The new microwave?

JONATHAN/FIRST: The gun. I want you to think hard. Where did they put the gun?

ANDREW: Hmm.

• From Beneath You it Devours

written by: Jane Espenson; Transcribed by: CariCranberry. edited by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/buffy/season7/transcripts/136_tran.php