(Hyperion Lobby. Cordelia looking bedraggled and shaken.)

CORDELIA: I'd - just like to say thank you. You believed in me when no one else would. Even in my darkest hours you were there for me (Close to tears) and that means more to me that you'll ever know. I guess what I'm really trying to say is: I love you. To all my fans: (Holds up scrub brush in plastic gloved hand) this is for you!

(Fred, also wearing cleaning gloves, applauds wildly)

FRED: Wow! That was just - wow. 'Cause... oh, and with the tears! I-I got chill bumps all up my arms.

CORDELIA: Yup. That's the famous speech. Not that I'll ever use it of course - unless they start handing out awards for best slime and grime. Oh, I swear. Next time Angel decides to blow something up he's cleaning his own scorch marks.

GUNN: (enters wearing cleaning gear) Ladies. Less yammering, more scrub.

CORDELIA: My. Gunn. Don't you look - sterile.

GUNN: Couple more hours sniffing that industrial cleanser, I think I might be. Hey, don't suppose you ladies wanna trade jobs?

CORDELIA: Ah-hmm. Scrape up Wolfram and Hart's entrails off floor, hmm - Fred?

FRED: You're screwed.

GUNN: (to Fred) Wes back yet?

CORDELIA: Nope. He's still at the store picking up some more extra strength ick remover.

(Gunn leaves.)

ANGEL: Look who's up from his nap.

CORDELIA: (pulling off gloves) Oh, Conner!

ANGEL: Oh. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa - dirty people. Not touching the baby.

CORDELIA: But pig-drinking bloodsuckers are okay? I meant that in a nice way. Okay, I'm gonna go wash my hands, but when I get back I get first dibs on baby snuggles.

ANGEL: Don't forget to get under your fingernails. (Quietly to Fred) Does she know?

WESLEY: (enters carrying bags) Where is she?

(Cordelia is in the bathroom popping prescription pills.)
(She returns to find Gunn and Wesley holding a cake. Everyone sings 'Happy Birthday.')

CORDELIA: (grinning) Oh you guys. I can't believe you did this.

GUNN: Well, don't just stand there. Blow out the candles, girl.

FRED: Did you make a wish?

CORDELIA: I sure did. Ah, Jude Law was a little busy, huh?

WESLEY: Oh, how disappointing for you. Well, I guess you won't be wanting the presents we...

CORDELIA: Oh, wanting. Wanting presents.

ANGEL: Do you want to hold the baby now?

CORDELIA: Yeah. (Takes Connor) Thank you. Oh, honey. Yeah, the baby, baby.

ANGEL: Uhm, ah, I-I got you a, a little something.

CORDELIA: (takes it) Oh, Angel, you didn't have to do that. You have enough to take care of as it is.

ANGEL: Well, I'm a champion. (Chuckles) We do important stuff. Hey, I mean who's more important then...

WESLEY: You have to forgive the wrapping. Some of us seem to have fostered a strange addiction to Scotch tape.

CORDELIA: Oh - what a cruel dilemma: presents or sweet little baby face. Aww.

(Cordelia coos at Connor, then her head whips up all smiles gone.)

CORDELIA: (to Angel) Take the baby.

ANGEL: You're choosing birthday gifts over my kid?

CORDELIA: Take the baby! Take the baby! Take the baby!

(He quickly does so, Cordelia gets hit by a vision.)

CORDELIA: Oooh, ooh! Ahh, it's a teenager, a girl, she... she's...

(CORDELIA is blasted backwards into the doors of the weapons cabinet, then lies motionless on the floor.)
WESLEY: Cordy?
FRED: Is she alright?

CORDELIA: (gasping and sitting up) I'm fine, you guys. I'll be okay. I'm just...

(She turns to see the gang clustered around her body - lying a few feet away.)

CORDELIA: Dead?

• Cordelia's visions & championhood

written by: Mere Smith; Originally transcribed by anonymous. Edited, formatted and checked against source for this site by Ann. . Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season3/transcripts/55_tran.shtml