CORDELIA: Demons, Demons, Demons. Wow! They put a lot of thought into *that* title.

WESLEY: It’s a demon database. What would you call it?

CORDELIA: I don’t know. How about – Demon Database?

WESLEY: Ahh! A name rife with single entendre.

CORDELIA: Why isn’t Wolfram&Hart in here?

WESLEY: Because they are lawyers, not demons?

CORDELIA: Fine line, if you ask me. Yeesh. They have a lot of entries! Did you know that there is a dozen species indigenous to LA County alone?

WESLEY: Do they have the Vigories of Oden Tal?

CORDELIA: Nope.

WESLEY: Hmm. So - there's still a place in this world for traditional research.

CORDELIA: There are some ugly critters in here. Someone ought to create an intra-demon dating base. You know, like archfiend.org, where the lonely and the slimy connect. I was just joking Mr. Grouchy Pants. When was the last time you had a dating base?

WESLEY: For your information – I lead a rich and varied social life.

CORDELIA: Oh, I know. Every night it’s Jeopardy, followed by Wheel of Fortune and a cup of hot cocoa. Look out girls, this one can’t be tamed!

WESLEY: I’ll admit it may not be as intoxicating as a life erected on high fashion pumps and a push-up bra.

CORDELIA: Hey, if anyone is wearing a push-up bra around here it’s (Sees Angel coming in) - Angel.

ANGEL: Did you two need to see a counselor?

CORDELIA: No, I’m way too single entendre - to benefit from therapy!

WESLEY: I don’t know why you take everything so personally.

CORDELIA: Me? Oh this is rich coming from Mr. ‘Don’t talk to me before I’ve had my *flagon* of oat-bran’ in the morning.

(Door opens a guy with a beat-up face in a suit walks in.)

ANGEL: Children, we have company.

• Cordelia & Wesley

written by: Howard Gordon; Original transcript by anonymous. Edited, formatted for the site and checked for accuracy by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season1/transcripts/16_tran.shtml