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come wander through the BuffyVerse...| Xander's Dadaist pep talk from The Freshman (Season 4) | Next Clip in Episode |
BUFFY: Ok. College is good.
XANDER: Ok, uh, once more with even less feeling.
BUFFY: No, really! I-I mean, Willow's in heaven and Oz has this really cool house off campus with the band.
XANDER: And you're sitting here alone at the Bronze looking like you just got diagnosed with cancer of the puppy.
BUFFY: It's just... there was this vampire, and she took me down, and I just... I don't know how to stop her.
XANDER: Then where's the gang? Avengers assemble! Let's get it going!
BUFFY: No, I don't want to bug them. I mean they're just starting school, and they don't need this.
XANDER: Ok Buff, what's the 'what' here?
BUFFY: It's just, what if I can't cut it?
XANDER: Can't cut what? Slaying?
BUFFY: Slaying, everything.
XANDER: Buffy, this is all about fear. It's understandable, but you can't let it control you. 'Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to anger.' No wait, hold on. 'Fear leads to hate. Hate leads to the dark side.' Hold on, no, umm, 'First you get the women, then you get the money, then you...' okay, can we forget that?
BUFFY: Thanks for the Dadaist pep talk, I feel much more abstract now.
XANDER: The point is, you're Buffy.
BUFFY: Yeah, maybe in high school I was Buffy.
XANDER: And now in college you're Betty Louise?
BUFFY: Yeah, I'm Betty Louise Plotnick of East Cupcake, Illinois. Or I might as well be.
XANDER: Buffy, I've gone through some fairly dark times in my life, faced some scary things, among them the kitchen at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club.' Let me tell you something, when it's dark and I'm all alone and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think, 'What would Buffy do?' You're my hero. Ok, sometimes when it's dark and I'm all alone I think, 'What is Buffy wearing?'
BUFFY: Can that be one of those things you never, ever, tell me about?
XANDER: It's a deal. Let's put this bitch in the ground! What do you say?
BUFFY: I think I say thank you.
XANDER: And nothing says thank you like dollars in the waistband. Ok, what do we do first?