CORDELIA: I can't even believe you. You dragged me out of bed for a ride? What am I, mass transportation?

XANDER: That's what a lot of the guys say, but it's just locker room talk. I wouldn't pay it any mind.

CORDELIA: Oh, great, so now I'm your taxi *and* your punching bag.

XANDER: I like to think of you more as my witless foil, but have it your way. (reaching Buffy's house) Buffy! (no response) C'mon, Cordelia. You wanna be a member of the Scooby Gang you gotta be willing to be inconvenienced every now and then.

CORDELIA: Oh, right, 'cause I lie awake at night hoping you tweakos will be my best friends. And that my first husband will be a balding, demented homeless man.

XANDER: Buffy could be in trouble.

CORDELIA: And what if she is exactly? What are you gonna do about it? In case you haven't noticed, you're the lameness and she's the super chick, or whatever.

XANDER: Well, at least I'm the lameness who cares, which is more than I can say about you.

• Cordelia & Scoobiage
• Xander & Cordelia

written by: Howard Gordon & Marti Noxon; Transcribed by: AleXander Thompson. Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/21myline1.html