WILLOW: Giles! Hi. Are you having a good time?

GILES: Yes. Yes.? There's, uh, a lot of new faces here, aren't there?

WILLOW: Yeah. Mostly kids from the dorm. A couple of Riley's friends.

(Buffy walks up with Riley.)

BUFFY: (happy) Hi, Giles.

GILES: Buffy. Happy Birthday.

BUFFY: Thank you.

GILES: (smiling) Nineteen. It's hard to believe, isn't it?

BUFFY: There's somebody here I want you to meet. Uh, this is Riley Finn . . .. my boyfriend.

(Giles gives Buffy a surprised look)

RILEY:It's very nice to meet you, Mr. Giles. Did you help plan this? It was quite a surprise.

GILES: (to Riley) The first of many. Uh, been . . . dating long?

BUFFY: Giles was the librarian at my high school.

RILEY: Ah, I've seen the library. It's gone down hill since you left.

GILES: (chuckling) Yes. I-I-I'm embarrassed to say that I actually miss it at times.

RILEY: So, you're retired?

GILES: (frowns) I'm sorry?

RILEY: Or . . . you're working somewhere else now?

GILES: (slightly embarrassed) Well, not, uh . . . sort of between projects, uh, right now, uh, it's a personal--

BUFFY: Oh! Oh, look. Giles has no cake.

RILEY: Oh, here. Here, I'll get you a piece.

(He hurries off to make the cake run.)

BUFFY: Oh, he's just nervous. But this is so nice. Having everyone together for my birthday. Of course, you could smash in all my toes with a hammer and it will still be the bestest Buffy Birthday Bash in a big long while.

GILES: Right. A-a-actually, Willow a-a-and Xander did all the planning. I'm not sure I would have gone with the surprise party. (smiles) You know, you have enough things jumping out at you in the dark.

BUFFY: Professor Walsh says that adrenaline is like exercise but without the exorbitant gym fees.

GILES: (a beat) Very witty.

BUFFY: You should meet her. She's absolutely the smartest person I've ever met.

GILES: (feeling a bit slighted) Perhaps we should have invited Professor Walsh to the party?

BUFFY: Oh, no. I mean, she's like forty. She's got better things to do than hang out with a bunch of kids.

(Giles is insulted. Buffy is oblivious.)

RILEY: Here you go, sir.

• Buffy & Giles
• Giles' mid-life crisis

written by: Jane Espenson; Transcribed by Joseph B. Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/68anewman.html