ANGEL: Teddy isn't crying. Do you see Teddy cry? Teddy isn't crying. Do you see Teddy crying? No, Teddy isn't crying. Come on, kid, you gotta give me something here. Alright. Last ditch effort. (singing) Toora-loora-loora, toora-loora-lay... Toora-loora-loora, that's an Irish lullaby...

(Angel breaks off, leaning his head against the side of the cradle in defeat as the crying never even slows.)

LORNE: Here let me give it a try. (Sings) Ooh, ooh, baby, baby. Ooh, ooh, baby, baby. Mistakes I know I made a few, but I'm only human. You'll make mistakes, too. And I'm crying... (Stops singing) He doesn't like Smokey Robinson and the Miracles? I thought you said this kid had a soul.

ANGEL: You know what, you're fed, you're changed. I hold you, you cry. I put you down, you cry. What do you want me to do here? (The baby cries.) I'm a terrible father. I can't even get him to stop crying.

LORNE: Yeah, well, it's getting a little tense - your vibe, that is.

ANGEL: My vibe? What vibe?

LORNE: Oh, just the incredibly anxious one that's been coming of you in waves ever since he was born. He's deeply connected to you. If you're wound this tight, how do you think he's gonna feel?

ANGEL: Hey, he's not even a day old and he's got an enemies list. How would you feel? Wouldn't you be a little edgy?

LORNE: Yeah. I'd also be in awe. Look at him. He's more than a mission, bro. *Look* at him. Look at him.

(Lorne turns and walks out of the room as Angel keeps looking at the baby, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Angel sits down in a chair.)

ANGEL: It's all right. It's gonna be alright. It's gonna be all right. Hey. Shh.

(Angel makes a face and silly noises.)

ANGEL: Do you like that? Well, obviously. Okay. How about this one?

(Angel pulls on his ears, makes another face and silly noises. )

ANGEL: Okay. I only got one more in me.

(Angel sighs and morphs into vamp-face. The baby looks up at him, stops crying and after a moment its eyes start drooping. A big smile spreads over Angel's face.)

ANGEL: Yeah, that's my little guy! You like that, don't you? A bootchee-wootchee...

• Angel & Connor
• Angel & Lorne (the Host)

written by: David H. Goodman; Original transcript anonymous. Edited and formatted for this site by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season3/transcripts/54_tran.shtml