ANDREW: You're English, right?

SPIKE: Yeah.

ANDREW: I've seen every episode of Doctor Who. Not Red Dwarf, though, 'cause, um...

JONATHAN: 'Cause it's not out yet on DVD.

ANDREW: Right. It's not out on ... (weakly) DVD.

SPIKE: (yells) Warren!!

WARREN: Here I am, here.

SPIKE: Bloody hell. Get on with it then. (Warren hands him printouts) Help me out here, Spock, I don't speak loser.

WARREN: Okay, right, um ... your chip works fine, yeah.

SPIKE: There's gotta be something wrong-

WARREN: No, no, listen. I don't know what that thing does ... I'd like to... (leans closer)

SPIKE: Hey!

WARREN: But whatever it is, it works fine. There's no deterioration of the signal, it still is coming through on a steady pulse. Which it's supposed to.

SPIKE: If you're lying to me-

WARREN: No! It's all right here. I, I mean, it is. It's really not that hard to figure out, if you just... What?

SPIKE: You tell anyone about this...

WARREN: No, I promise. Who would I tell, I don't even know what this is about!

SPIKE: It's about the rules having changed. Everything's different now. (to himself) Nothing wrong with me. Something wrong with her.

• Buffy vs the Legion of Dorkness (Trio)
• Spike & Andrew
• Spike's defanging

written by: Drew Z. Greenberg; transcribed by Joan the English Chick (pisces@englishchick.com); action descriptions shortned by me. . Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/109smashed.html