(underground crypt)

HARMONY: Hi baby. I'm back.

(we see she's talking to Spike. Cut to commercial and resume on Spike arguing with a vamp minion)

SPIKE: It's definitely the crypt, right? I'm not keen on tunneling into someone's septic tank.

Vampire: It's the crypt. The radar soundings are clear. The walls are thinnest here at the bottom. We'll have to tunnel underneath. More work but I'm sure -

SPIKE: You'd better be more than sure. Cause I'd hate to have to hurt you.

Vampire: I swear, I swear.

HARMONY: How's my little Blondie bear?

SPIKE: Harm, does this look like a good time?

HARMONY: Are you gonna kill Willow tonight? Cause I want you to say, 'This is for messing with my sweet girl.' And then, you know.

(He throws the vampire aside then takes Harmony by the waist.)

SPIKE: Nobody knows I'm here. And I'm not killing the slayer's best friend because that would tend to announce my presence. And we're too bloody close.

HARMONY: But you almost killed her last year. Suddenly it's a big deal.?

SPIKE: SOD OFF! Now go eat something, I've got work to do.

(Spike and the vampire return to the table. She walks over to wear a boy is chained up and looks irritated.)

HARMONY: This one tastes funny. Take me out to eat.

SPIKE: He's perfectly fresh.

HARMONY: I think I had a math class with him last year and I didn't like him that much then either.

SPIKE: Harm!

HARMONY: I want to go to a party.

(Spike slams his fists into the table, then heads over to where she is. He grabs her and slams her into the wall. She smiles coyly at him.)

HARMONY: Oh. Right here baby. In front of Bernie.

SPIKE: You'd like that wouldn't you.

HARMONY: Maybe I would. After a party.

SPIKE: Tonight. I'll take you somewhere nice.

• Spike & Harmony

written by: Jane Espenson; Transcribed by: Jillian Tatterton . Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/59theharshlightofday.html