(Wesley bursts into the living room of an elderly couple)

WESLEY: Don't move a muscle! Demon spawn! Cowards! Don't make me thrash it out of you. Where do you lay your eggs? In the cellar?

ANGEL: (in doorway) Wesley...

WESLEY: In the bedroom?

ANGEL: Yeah, that's right, termites lay their eggs anywhere, such as next door. (gestures towards other house where demon eggs are visible through window)

WESLEY: Oh.

ANGEL: And we fight termites, wherever they may roam.

WESLEY: (to couple) Sorry about the door.

(They leave)

(...)

(During fight with demons next door, Wesley is thrown through the front door of the house into the yard.)

WESLEY: (charging back inside) You'll pay for that!

(Angel and Wesley emerge victorious...and out of breath)

WESLEY: That was bracing.

ANGEL: Yeah. Baby just hatched. Wouldn't want to run into him when he grows up and gets his drivers license.

WESLEY: And thank you very much, Cordelia, for sending us to the wrong house. Another five minutes and that thing would have been loose in the world.

ANGEL: Huh, well, it all worked out.

WESLEY: This time. Maybe we should, uh, clean up...You think a Tahval demon leaves a hefty security deposit?

ANGEL: I'm sure of it.

WESLEY: Well, it's not my place - Cordelia works for you - but she doesn't seem to be paying attention to her duties lately.

ANGEL: She's had a lot to deal with. I mean, Doyle's death, inheriting his visions, she's young. She's still trying to find her way in the world.

WESLEY: But we're not in the world. Demon hunters like us have a higher calling.

ANGEL: You, uh... (Angel points out demon splatter on Wesley's cheek)

WESLEY: Thanks. I mean, no one is more fond of Cordelia than I, but if she wants to go gad-abouting with those doxies...

ANGEL: I think they liked you.

WESLEY: Really! I - I didn't mean doxy in the sexual promiscuous sense, exactly. I - You don't think sticking the axe in the wall put them off?

ANGEL: That was charming.

WESLEY: What about the fact they thought we were gay?

ANGEL: Adds mystery.

• Angel & Wesley
• Funnies

written by: Howard Gordon; Originally transcribed by anonymous. Edited and formatted for this site by ros_fod. Checked against source by renenet and me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season1/transcripts/12_tran.shtml