GILES: You went hunting last night.

BUFFY: Yes.

GILES: When you assured me you wouldn't.

BUFFY: Yes, I lied, I'm a bad person, let's move on.

GILES: Did you see someone with a fork?

BUFFY: More like a jumbo claw.

GILES: Oh. Well, uh, at least you're not hurt.

BUFFY: And I saw something else. Something much more interesting than your average run-of-the-mill killer vampire.

GILES: Oh?

BUFFY: Do you know Miss French, the teacher that's subbing for Dr. Gregory?

GILES: Yes. Yes, she's lovely. In a, a common, extremely well proportioned way.

BUFFY: Well, I'm chasing Claw Guy last night, and Miss Well Proportioned is heading home. The Claw Guy takes one look at her and runs screaming for cover.

GILES: He what? Ran away?

BUFFY: He was petrified.

GILES: Of Miss French?

BUFFY: Uh-huh! So I'm an undead monster that can shave with my hand... How many things am I afraid of?

GILES: Not many. And not substitute teachers, as a rule.

• Buffy & Giles

written by: David Greenwalt; Transcribed by: AleXander Thompson. Full transcript at:
http://www.studiesinwords.de/04pet.html