ANGEL: You?re an idiot, Spike.

SPIKE: You think? Huh, because I?m not the one chained to the ceiling with hot pokers in my side.

ANGEL: You hired a vampire. What do you think he is going to do with the rings when he finds it, huh? Hand it over to you?

SPIKE: Good Lord, why didn?t I think of...? Oh, half a mo?, I did. I hired a guy who doesn?t care about the ring, or anything else on God?s green earth except taking blokes apart one piece at a time. It?s called addiction, Angel. We all have them. I believe yours is named ?Slutty the vampire slayer.? (The music ends and Spike breathes a sigh of relief) Thank you. Speaking of little Buff, I ran into her recently. Your name didn?t come up. Although she has been awful busy jumping the bones of the very first lunk-head who came along. Good-looking fellow. Used her shamelessly. She is *cute* when she is hurtin?, isn?t she?

ANGEL: I think she?s cuter when she?s kicking your ass.

(Marcus starts the LP over and Spike sighs.)

SPIKE: I think I will go get a bit of fresh air, leave you two kids to it. (Marcus sticks another hot poker through Angel?s thigh, who lets out a short scream) Now THAT?S music.

• Angel & Spike
• Buffy & Angel
• Buffy & Spike

written by: Douglas Petrie; Originally transcribed by anonymous. Edited, formatted for this site and checked by M'lyn.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season1/transcripts/03_tran.shtml