ANGEL: What did you find out?

GUNN: Alright. Robed vampires been grabbing people off the street for a while now, almost a month.

CORDELIA: A month? How come we didn't know about it?

ANGEL: Well, we've all been a little distracted lately.

GUNN: Yeah. Or maybe we haven't heard because not a lot of bodies been turning up.

ANGEL: They're not feeding. They're turning them.

CORDELIA: Into vampires?

WESLEY: Someone's recruiting, building an army.

GUNN: Question is, for what?

(cut to Vampire Doug, addressing a crowd of vampires)

DOUG: The time is here. The time is now. The question is: are you ready? Are you ready!?! Because it's time. Everybody, take a seat. It's time to actualize your potential. Time to maximize your personal input and get the most out of your afterlife. To those in here for the first time I just want to say - hi. Hi. You're special. You each have it in you to be the best vampire. Not just any vampire, but a master! How? I'll show you.

(He points at a poster with a multilevel pyramid on it)

DOUG: Through my personally devised, multi-level, exponential flow cooperative. Yeah, I know what some of you are saying. 'Hey, Doug, speak English, man!' Okay, don't stake me, guys, alright? This is how it works. One vampire turns two humans into vampires. They each turn to more humans into vampires and they turn to more into vampires and so on (and so on. And all it takes for each new vampire to buy their way into our co-op is one, you heard me, *one* human - to be deposited here in our very own food bank.

(The lights on stage change, revealing a cage full of humans. The audience gets to their feet and starts applauding. )

DOUG: How about that, huh? You turn two into vampires, and you bring one for the food bank. You turn two, and the rest is food. Let me hear it. Turn two, the rest is food.

written by: David Fury; Original transcript anonymous. Edited & formatted for this site by me.. Full transcript at:
http://www.buffyworld.com/angel/season2/transcripts/39_tran.shtml