Walking into school on Monday morning Buffy steeled herself to face her Watcher and friend, neither Xander nor Giles was likely to see the romance as Willow had or the love and dedication her mother had, they would see one thing and one thing only – VAMPIRE! Well she would just have to make them understand or at the very least accept because there was no way she was going to let anything come between her and Spike.
 
God she missed him, they had parted last night when he walked her home after patrol. They had spent a considerable amount of time saying goodbye on the front porch until her mother had come out and very nicely but firmly bid Spike goodnight. Maybe she could just turn around and head over to the cemetery, then she wouldn’t have to deal with this right now; and Spike arms, mmmm, could there be a better place to be than wrapped up in beautiful, strong, sexy Spike arms!
 
“Hey Buffy!” Willow’s voice broke through her daydream.
 
“Hey Will.” Buffy’s voice was a little less than enthusiastic.
 
“What’s wrong, nothing wrong with you and Spike is there?” Willow asked, a small frown of worry creasing her brow. She thought the story Buffy had told her of how her and Spike had got together was the sweetest most romantic thing she had heard and the thought that they could be having problems bothered her greatly.
 
“No, no, Spike is wonderful, we are fine, good, better than good’, a dreamy smile played across her face.
“Earth to Buffy!” Willow laughed, relieved that things were still in dreamsville for her best friend and her vampire.
 
“Huh, oh sorry Will, Spike thoughts tend to lead to Buffy spacedom!”
 
“So what is wrong then?”
 
“Oh, oh yeah, Giles, Xander, the big confession, yulche! Thoughts of running away to the Big Bad and hiding! What do you think?”
 
“Well, hiding could be a temporary good, is true, but then, tomorrow, or the next day? Sooner or later you are gonna have to tell them! Come on Buff, you can do this, and I’ll be with you...like, you know, a blanky! A big Willow shaped security blanket, and if Xander gives you a hard time I’ll show him my resolve face, he knows better than to argue with the resolve face!
 
“Ok Will, I’m relying on you to save me from the Xander monster, that just leaves the big scary Watcher!”
 
The two girls made there way slowly to the school library. It was a great reflection on the academic prowess of the school population that the library could pretty much always be guaranteed to be empty of all but the scoobies. They entered the library to see Xander sitting on the research table obviously having a conversation with someone, a very tormented looking Giles emerged from behind the stacks.
 
“Buffy, Willow, you’re here!” Giles enthused, “Thank God” he muttered quietly to himself. Any more of Xander Harris this morning and he was likely to stake him. “I must say Buffy I am inordinately pleased to see you in one piece. Your disappearance on Friday night was most disturbing. Your mother assures me it was in no way slayer related however as your watcher I feel I am entitled to some form of explanation!” Leaning back against his desk he looked expectantly at his charge.
 
“Umm, yeah, where I was on Friday night. Well you see, this is a really long and not very interesting story and probably one you don’t have time for right now so why don’t we just leave it for another time. Oh look at the time, gonna be late for class, can’t have that now can we I mean, learning very important, I’m all with the whole, Buffy learn thing!” Buffy’s face reddened as panic set in.
 
“Buffy.” Willow took her friends arm forcing her to look at her. “Its ok, Buffy, come on, you can do this.” Turning a firm gaze on the two males in the room, Willow admonished them, “you just leave her alone and let her tell the whole story ok. And there will be no jumping down people’s throats or laying of blame!” The little red head’s determination clearly showing on her face.
 
“So Will, already in the know hey? Gee typical. Of course Buffy would tell you, I mean girl talk, I get it, I understand … really!” Xander’s voice took on an even more whiny quality than normal.
 
“Xander Harris!” Willow glared at him.
 
“Ok, ok, shutting up now.” Xander quickly backed down not wishing to incur the tiny red head’s wrath.
 
Buffy looked around the room at the expectant faces of the two men and the supportive face of her small, deceptively mild ally. “Ok here goes…”
 
As Buffy relayed the events of the past 6 or so months the faces of her watcher and friend changed several times, from disbelief to fear, from distrust, to horror. Buffy tried hard not to let their faces effect her, kept looking to Willow’s warm supportive face for comfort and security. By the time her story was complete Xander was blustering and her watcher, face red with barely contained anger, was polishing his glasses so furiously Buffy was sure they would catch fire or something.
 
“Spike!” Xander’s voice was dripping with disgust! “Buffy, how could you, I mean SPIKE of all peo…animals, that’s what he is an animal, a disgusting filthy thing who has tried to kill you and us how many times?”
 
“Xander, leave her alone!” Willow’s voice cut through his rant as Buffy’s face dissolved into tears. “Look what you’ve done, how could you!” Willow engulfed her sobbing friend in her arms.
 
“It’s ok Buffy, don’t listen to him. He’s an idiot and a… a…well I can’t think of the word at the moment but when I do, well, he’s one of them too!”
 
Willow’s words brought a smile to Buffy’s face and a small laugh despite her tears.
 
“Will, we’re talking about…” Xander’s words were cut off by the furious glare of his oldest friend. Wisely for once he chose to shut up.
 
A small voice, scared and desperate emerged from the tiny blonde, “Giles?”
 
The watcher raised his face from and looked at his slayer, she was quite obviously miserable and a surge of pity rose in him to be quickly squashed. No, no matter his paternal feelings for his charge he had responsibilities as her watcher, this was just unacceptable, a renowned vicious slayer murdering Master Vampire was in no way an acceptable association romantic or otherwise. Nevertheless his heart went out to her. Keeping his voice gentle he addressed his surrogate daughter.
 
“Buffy, I understand that it is easy to be beguiled into believing Spike’s attentions to be of a romantic nature. I can however assure you that vampires are completely incapable of feelings of this nature. And that even though his motive may be currently undecipherable it would inevitably be revealed to be nefarious.”
 
“You’re wrong Giles, he loves me, if he wanted me dead I would have been dead ages ago, he could have killed me so many times. And, and, this is Spike we are talking about, not big on the whole long term planing thing, you know that.” Her eyes were pleading with him to understand. “You should see the sword he gave me for my birthday, it’s beautiful and he had it made for me, and he helps me train and taught me how to use my spidey sense and…oh Giles, I just know he loves me ok, I can tell. Every time he touches me I can feel his love and when he fed…” Her voice tapered off, horror encompassing her at what she had just revealed.
  
‘My God they’re gonna stake him for that and it’s all my fault.’ The thought of her lover being dusted clutched at her heart like a vice. Like hell they will, Buffy’s inner slayer rose to the forefront.
 
“He what?” Both Giles and Xander exclaimed at the same time.
 
Buffy drew herself up to her full hight of five foot nothing, her voice hardened and they were no longer facing Buffy Summers but one fiercely protective slayer, her eyes flashed as she enunciated clearly so there would be no misunderstanding. “He fed on me, I asked him to, he didn’t want to but I convinced him. In case you had forgotten vampires need blood to live, slayer blood is strong and powerful and Spike only needs a small amount to survive. It is my blood and my choice do you understand me? I do not wish to speak about this again, what Spike and I do in private is our business and not yours!” She pinned each of the men with a determined stare until, reluctantly, they backed down, eyes lowering. “If either of you do anything, and I mean ANYTHING to harm or threaten Spike in any way I will never forgive you, do you understand that?” She waited for a response. Xander buckled under the powerful stare of the infuriated slayer.
 
Giles cleared his throat, not quite so easily intimidated as the young man beside him, “Buffy, I still feel it is my duty to point out to you the dangers inherent in this course of action. Surely you can see that allowing a vampire, any vampire but most especially a vampire with a reputation for killing slayers, to feed on you is asking for catastrophe. Even if as you say he has nothing but the best of intentions in regard to you, the type of control required for a vampire to disrupt feeding on what is to these creatures the most concentrated source of power ….”
 
“Firstly, Spike is not a creature, secondly you have no idea the amount of control Spike is capable of. You have no idea how much he loves me and how much me being hurt in any way would effect him. I am telling you he will not hurt me, he has fed off me a few times now and never has he taken more than a couple of mouthfuls and not once has he had any trouble at all remaining in complete control.” Buffy fumed at the implication that Spike would harm her intentionally or otherwise.
 
“Buffy, I understand that it is difficult for you to remain impartial under the circumstances and I am not suggesting that he would intentionally harm you but accidents happen. Also there is the complete probability that, if as you say he is infatuated with you, he would wish to make the arrangement a little more, shall we say, permanent?”
 
“He would never do that.” Buffy denied, aghast at the suggestion. Giles opened his mouth to protest further only to be interrupted by the slayer’s fist crashing down on the table in front of her. “Enough! I don’t want to hear any more, I love Spike, he loves me, we will be seeing each other and you will just have to deal with that fact, ok!” With that The Slayer turned on her heel and marched out of the room, followed closely by Willow, who turned to give the two flabbergasted males one more disparaging look on her way out the door.
 
Xander gathered his things and followed meekly behind the rapidly disappearing forms of the two girls.
 
No one noticing he dark shape deep in the stacks.
 
*********************
 
Angel had made his way through the tunnels to the library, determined to speak to the watcher. To make him listen to his concerns about Buffy spending time with Spike. He was not even sure the watcher was aware of the blonde pests continuing presence in Sunnydale let alone his association with The Slayer. There was way too much that Buffy was keeping to herself, things he was going to make certain were brought into the light.
 
He had come up out of the tunnels and into the stacks to find the room full of scoobies, Giles, Willow, the annoying boy and Buffy. He had melted into the shadows and listened. It seemed Buffy had pulled a disappearing act on Friday and her watcher wanted to know where she had been. He saw Buffy hesitate, trying to find a way to avoid answering. As the conversation continued and her whereabouts was revealed a cold fury gripped him. Ripping at his insides like knives, his fists clenched as nails dug deep into palms, drawing blood. Teeth clenched tight in an effort to restrain the rage boiling up, the urge to fly into the room and shake her till her teeth rattled in her head to belt her into submission. How dare she, how dare this stupid little girl reject him, his support and protection - his love! And then to add insult to injury she gave herself to him; his insufferable grandchilde a soulless, malicious, evil, obnoxious vermin!

She was tainted now, she would never again be the beautiful, pure, sweet slayer he had loved, nurtured and cherished. He would not allow this to continue however, could not in all conscience. He knew what Spike was, knew him for the filth, the animal he was! He had to make sure her watcher put an end to this perversion, it could not be allowed to continue!   
 
He waited until all the children were gone. Stepping out from behind the stacks he spoke to the weary librarian, watching with some pride at the man’s obvious jolt of fear. “You know this cannot be allowed to continue, don’t you.”
 
“What precisely would that be, Angel?” Giles annoyance at the vampire clear in his voice. This vampire may have a soul but he had never liked or trusted him and after Buffy’s obvious distress at her birthday party he was more convinced than ever that his initial judgement was correct. There was a cruel set to the dark haired man’s mouth and a hardness to his eyes that never seemed to leave.
 
“Spike!” The word was spoken with dripping hatred and loathing. The vampire loomed over the other man, his dark presence would be intimidating to most, the watcher however was not most men.
 
“I do not believe that is any of your business Angel, in fact I do not believe anything Buffy does is your concern, if I remember correctly you are no longer dating and she has made it quite clear that she no longer wishes to have you involved in her life or her duties.”
 
“Yes you are correct, we aren’t seeing each other any more, however I still care about her and Giles Spike is dangerous, he is one of the most dangerous vampires in existence. You know this, you have seen him and the things he does. He kills slayers, that is what he does and he is very inventive in his methods and NEVER gives up. You can not possibly think he is in love with a slayer, you know yourself vampires do not have souls, they are incapable of love or of anything close to love, they are devoid of feeling and compassion. This thing will kill your slayer if you do not do something about it!”
 
“Yes well, I will certainly consider your words before determining my course of action in regard to the current situation, however I must stress that I trust my slayer and her judgement and this also will be taken into account.” Giles dismissed the vampire and turned to make his way to his office, despite the words he had just spoken he was deeply concerned with Buffy’s news that she was romantically involved with an unsouled vampire and even more so by her admission to allowing said vampire to feed on her.
 
“A spell!” Angel blurted out in a last ditched effort to make the other man listen to him.
 
Giles turned, “what was that?”
“The sword he gave her, for her birthday, I only caught a brief glimpse of it but it has markings, runes of some sort, it has only been since he gave her the sword that she has been acting this way, I think it is a spell, a way of controlling her!”
 
“I see, well, that is certainly something I will have to look into. Thankyou for your time Angel, you will close the door on your way out won’t you.” With that he turned and once more made his way towards his office, shutting himself in there he drew a deep breath as he sat and contemplated all he had been told this morning.

 

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