Angel's Secrets

BtVS Quotes Poll Archive   

Buffy: What are you doing here. Five words or less.
Spike: Out. For. A. Walk . . . Bitch.
No Place Like Home
received 40.7% of 123 votes [Finalist! received 29.6% of 277 votes]

Buffy: I kill your kind.
Spike: And I bite yours. So how come I don't wanna bite you? And why am I fightin' other vampires? I must be a noble vampire. A good guy. On a mission of redemption. I help the hopeless. I'm a vampire with a soul.
Buffy: A vampire with a soul? Oh my god, how lame is that?
Tabula Rasa
received 35.3% of 68 votes [Finalist! received 2.5% of 277 votes]

Cordelia: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.
Oz: We attack the Mayor with hummus.
Cordelia: I stand corrected.
Oz: Just keeping things in perspective.
Graduation Day, Part 2
received 33.0% of 109 votes

Angel: This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you, you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after.
Buffy: No. When you kiss me I wanna die.
Reptile Boy
received 32.8% of 58 votes [Finalist! received 7.9% of 277 votes]

Angel: What's happening?
Buffy: Shh. Don't worry about it. I love you.
Angel: I love you.
Buffy: Close your eyes.
Becoming, Part 2
received 31.5% of 89 votes [Finalist! received 5.1% of 277 votes]

Willow: That's what it was! I mean, why else would she be acting like such a b-i-t-c-h?
Giles: Willow, I think we're all a little too old to be spelling things out.
Xander: A bitca?
When She Was Bad
received 31.1% of 90 votes [Finalist! received 6.9% of 277 votes]

Wesley: Buffy, you will go to the Gleave's family crypt tonight and fetch the amulet.
Buffy: I will?
Wesley: Are you not used to being given orders?
Buffy: Whenever Giles sends me on a mission, he always says "please." And afterwards I get a cookie.
Bad Girls
received 29.6% of 54 votes [Finalist! received 6.9% of 277 votes]

Whistler: Bottom line is, even if you see 'em coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are.
Becoming, Part 1
received 28.1% of 89 votes [Finalist! received 10.8% of 277 votes]

Buffy: My diary? You read my diary? That is *not* okay! A diary is like a person's most private place! I... You don't even know what I was writing about! 'Hunk' can mean a lot of things, bad things. And, and when it says that your eyes are 'penetrating', I meant to write 'bulging'.
Angel: Buffy...
Buffy: And 'A' doesn't even stand for 'Angel' for that matter, it stands for... 'Achmed', a charming foreign exchange student, so that whole fantasy part has nothing to even do with you at all...
Angel: Your mother moved your diary when she came in to straighten up. I watched from the closet. I didn't read it, I swear.
received 27.8% of 90 votes [Finalist! received 9.7% of 277 votes]

Spike: I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flowerperson, and I spent the next six hours watchin' my hand move.
School Hard
received 25.9% of 58 votes [Finalist! received 6.5% of 277 votes]

Oz: I'm gonna ask you to go out with me tomorrow night. And I'm kinda nervous about it, actually. It's interesting.
Willow: Oh. Well, if it helps at all, I'm gonna say yes.
Oz: Yeah, it helps. It-it creates a comfort zone. Do you wanna go out with me tomorrow night?
Willow: Oh! I can't!
Oz: Well, see, I like that you're unpredictable.
received 24.6% of 77 votes [Finalist! received 14.1% of 277 votes]

Angel: Um, am I gonna see you this weekend? You, uh, you-you probably have plans.
Buffy: Right, birthday. Um, actually, I, I do have a thing.
Angel: Oh, a thing. A date?
Buffy: Nice attempt at casual. Actually, I do have a date. Older man. Very handsome. He likes it when I call him 'Daddy'.
Angel: Huh, your father. It is your father, right?
received 21.5% of 79 votes

Spike: You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood...blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
received 21.1% of 123 votes

Buffy: How did you find me here?
Angel: If I was blind, I would see you.
received 20.5% of 88 votes

Angel: Be careful with this gift. A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful, they can be painful.
Buffy: Like say, immortality?
Angel: Exactly, Iím dying to get rid of that.
Buffy: Funny.
Angel: Iím a funny guy.
received 20.3% of 59 votes

Willow: It's just, in high school, knowledge was pretty much frowned upon. You really had to work to learn anything. But here, the energy, the collective intelligence... It's like this force, this penetrating force, and I can just feel my mind opening up, you know, and letting this place just thrust into and, and spurt knowledge into... That sentence ended up in a different place than it started out in.
The Freshman
received 20% of 105 votes

Giles: Feel up to some training?
Buffy: Sure, we could work-out after school, you know, if youíre not too busy having sex with my mother!
received 18.6% of 59 votes

Cordelia: What gives you the right to suck face with your demon lover again?
Buffy: It was an accident!
Xander: What, you just tripped and fell on his lips?
received 17% of 88 votes

Willow: No, it's fine. I'm 'Old Reliable'.
Xander: She just means, you know, the geyser. You're like a geyser of fun that goes off at regular intervals.
Willow: That's Old Faithful.
Xander: Isn't that the dog that, that the guy had to shoot...
Willow: That's Old Yeller.
Buffy: Xander, I beg you not to help me.
received 16.6% of 54 votes

Buffy: What is this?
Willow: A doodle. I do doodle. You too. You do doodle, too.
received 16.5% of 79 votes

Frat Guy #1: If we cannot scare the young women, they will not fall into our arms. We'll have womanless arms. Halloween's not about thrills, chills, and funny costumes. It's about getting laid.
Frat Guy #2: Is there any holiday that's not about getting laid?
Frat Guy #1: Arbor Day.
Fear, Itself
received 16.2% of 105 votes

Buffy: The Cliff Notes version? I want a normal life. Like I had before.
Angel: Before me.
Buffy: No, Angel, it's not you. You're the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense to me. I just get messed sometimes. I wish we could be regular kids.
Angel: Yeah. I'll never be a kid.
Buffy: Okay, then a regular kid and her cradle robbing, creature-of-the-night boyfriend.
What's My Line, Part 1
received 15.6% of 77 votes

Buffy: Willow, you're alive?
Willow: Aren't I usually?
received 15.2% of 59 votes

Xander: Beautiful girl with ... no other thought but to please you ... willing to do anything...Too many girls. I miss Oz. He'd get it. He wouldn't say anything, but...he'd get it.
I Was Made to Love You
received 14.7% of 68 votes

Wesley: You can't turn your back on the Council.
Buffy: They're in England. I don't think they can tell which way my back is facing.
Graduation Day, Part 1
received 14.7% of 109 votes

Giles: You mean life?
Buffy: Yeah. Does it get easy?
Giles: What do you want me to say?
Buffy: Lie to me.
Giles: Yes, it's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and, uh, we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after.
Buffy: Liar.
received 14.6% of 123 votes

Mr. Whitmore: S-E-X. Sex. The sex drive in the human animal is intense. How many of us have lost countless productive hours plagued by unwanted sexual thoughts and feelings?
Xander: Yes! Mm-hm.
Mr. Whitmore: That was a rhetorical question, Mr. Harris, not a poll.
Bad Eggs
received 14.3% of 77 votes

Giles: Cordelia, it's me! It's me!
Cordelia: How do we know it's really you and not zombie Giles?
Giles: Cordelia, do stop being tiresome.
Cordelia: It's him.
Dead Man's Party
received 13.6% of 88 votes

Giles: Demons after money. Whatever happened to the still-beating heart of a virgin? No one has any standards anymore.
received 13.6% of 59 votes

Parker: I'm not doing the deep "get sympathy" routine. I mean, don't you just hate guys who are all, "I'm dark and brooding, so give me love."
Buffy: I don't think I've ever met that type...
The Harsh Light of Day
received 13.3% of 105 votes

Angel: Truth is, I thought you'd be taller, or bigger muscles and all that. You're pretty spry, though.
Buffy: What do you want?
Angel: The same thing you do.
Buffy: Okay. What do I want?
Angel: To kill them. To kill them all.
Buffy: Sorry, that's incorrect. But you do get this lovely watch and a year's supply of Turtle Wax. What I want is to be left alone!
Welcome to the Hellmouth
received 13.2% of 68 votes

Drusilla: I'm naming all the stars.
Spike: You can't see the stars, love. That's the ceiling. Also, it's day.
received 13% of 77 votes

Xander: So what are our options?
Willow: Well, I figure either... I refuse to do the spell and he kills us, or I do the spell and he kills us.
Xander: Give me a third option.
Willow: He's so drunk he forgets about us, and we starve to death. That's sort of the best one.
Lovers Walk
received 12.6% of 79 votes

Vamp Girl: Does this sweater make me look fat?
Sunday: No. The fact that you're fat makes you look fat. That sweater just makes you look... purple.
The Freshman
received 12.4% of 105 votes

Buffy: They say how he's gonna kill me? Do you think it'll hurt? Don't touch me! Were you even gonna tell me?
Giles: I was hoping that I wouldn't have to. That there was... some way around it. I...
Buffy: I've got a way around it. I quit!
Angel: It's not that simple.
Buffy: I'm making it that simple! I quit! I resign, I-I'm fired, you can find someone else to stop the Master from taking over!
Giles: I'm not sure that anyone else can. All the... the signs indicate...
Prophecy Girl
received 12.2% of 90 votes

Anya: What a day. Gimme a beer.
Bartender: I.D....I.D.
Anya: I'm eleven hundred and twenty years old! Just gimme a frickin' beer!
Bartender: I.D.
Anya: Gimme a Coke.
received 11.9% of 59 votes

Angelus: Been there, done that, and deja vu just isn't what it used to be.
received 11.8% of 68 votes

Buffy: The girl's not playing with a full deck, Giles. She has almost no deck. She has a three.
Faith, Hope and Trick
received 11.4% of 88 votes

Buffy: Cordelia, your mouth is open and sound is coming from it. This is never good.
When She Was Bad
received 11.1% of 90 votes

Buffy: Do you remember the demon that almost got out the night I died?
Willow: Every nightmare I had that doesn't revolve around academic failure or public nudity is about that thing. In fact, once I dreamt that it attacked me while I was late for a test, and naked.
The Zeppo
received 11.1% of 54 votes

Wesley: Remember the three key words for any Slayer: preparation... preparation... preparation.
Buffy: That's one word three times.
Bad Girls
received 11.1% of 54 votes

Willow: Anyway, Professor Walsh is supposed to be great. She's like world-renowned.
Buffy: How do you get to be renowned? I mean, like, do you have to be nowned first?
Willow: Yes, first there's the painful nowning process.
The Freshman
received 10.5% of 105 votes

Giles: You took your roommate patrolling with you?
Buffy: Well, I invited the whole dorm, but she was the only one who could make it.
Living Conditions
received 10.5% of 105 votes

Giles: The more I study the Judge, the less I like him. His touch can literally burn the humanity out of you. A true creature of evil can survive the process. No human ever has.
Xander: What's the problem? We send Cordy to fight this guy, and we go for pizza.
received 10.4% of 77 votes

Buffy: Nope. Why? Are you jealous?
Angel: Of Xander? Please. He's just a kid.
Buffy: Is it 'cause I danced with him?
Angel: 'Danced with' is a pretty loose term. 'Mated with' might be a little closer.
Some Assembly Required
received 10.3% of 58 votes

Buffy: I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. I can't.
Angel: Buffy, please. Just this once... let me be strong.
Buffy: Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, then I don't know what can.
received 10.1% of 79 votes

Buffy: Mom, dead people are talking to you. Do the math!
received 10.1% of 79 votes

Willow: Hey, I eat danger for breakfast.
Xander: But, oddly enough, she panics in the face of breakfast foods.
received 10.1% of 109 votes

Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me?
Xander: One of us is very confused, and I honestly don't know which.
The Prom
received 10.1% of 109 votes

Angelus: You got a lot to learn about men, kiddo. Although I guess you proved that last night.
Buffy: What are you saying?
Angelus: Let's not make an issue out of it, okay? In fact, let's not talk about it at all. It happened.
Buffy: I, I don't understand. Was it m-me? Was I not good?
Angelus: You were great. Really. I thought you were a pro.
received 9.1% of 77 votes

Xander: I'm sorry, but let's not forget that I hated Angel long before you guys jumped on the bandwagon. So I think I deserve a little something for not saying 'I told you so' long before now. And if Giles wants to go after the, uh, fiend that murdered his girlfriend, I say, 'Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!'
received 9% of 89 votes

Kendra: In case de curse does not succeed, dis is my lucky stake. I have killed many vampires wit it. I call it Mr. Pointy.
Buffy: You named your stake?
Kendra: Yes.
Buffy: Remind me to get you a stuffed animal.
Becoming, Part 1
received 9% of 89 votes

Xander: And they burst in, rescuing us, without even knocking? I mean, this is really all their fault.
Buffy: Your logic does not resemble our Earth logic.
Xander: Mine is much more advanced.
The Wish
received 8.9% of 79 votes

Buffy: Is Sunnydale any better than when I first came here? Okay, so I battle evil. But I don't really win. The bad keeps coming back and getting stronger. Like that kid in the story, the boy that stuck his finger in the duck.
Angel: Dike. It's another word for dam.
Buffy: Oh. Okay, that story makes a lot more sense now.
received 8.9% of 79 votes

Xander: Y'know, this might go a lot faster if you femmes actually picked up a shovel, too.
Giles: Here, here.
Buffy: Sorry, but I'm an old-fashioned gal. I was raised to believe that men dig up the corpses and the women have the babies.
Some Assembly Required
received 8.7% of 58 votes

Xander: Kerouac. He's my teacher. The open road, my school.
Buffy: Making the open dumpster your cafeteria?
Xander: Go ahead, mock me.
Oz: I think she just did.
Xander: We bohemian, anti-establishment types have always been persecuted.
Oz: Well, sure, you're all so weird.
received 8.5% of 59 votes

Xander: Here's your coffee. Brewed from the finest Colombian lighter fluid.
Giles: Horrible.
Xander: Aren't you supposed to be drinking tea anyway?
Giles: Tea is soothing. I wish to be tense.
Graduation Day, Part 2
received 8.2% of 109 votes

Willow: I knew it! I knew it! Well, not "knew it" in the sense of having the slightest idea, but I knew there was something I didn't know.
received 8.1% of 123 votes

Faith: I could eat a horse. Isn't it crazy how slayin' just always makes you hungry and horny?
Buffy: Well... Sometimes I-I crave a nonfat yogurt afterwards.
Faith, Hope and Trick
received 8% of 88 votes

Xander: Uh, no worries. I can handle the Oz Full Monty. I mean, not 'handle' handle, like 'hands to flesh' handle.
Willow: Okay. Well, it's not for you. It's for me, 'cause I'm still getting used to half a Monty.
Xander: Oh. Good. Half? You and Oz? Which half?
Willow: Wouldn't you like to know?
Beauty and the Beasts
received 8% of 88 votes

Buffy: Long story.
Cordelia: Got hunted.
Buffy: Apparently not that long.
received 8% of 88 votes

Xander: Visiting hours are over.
Angelus: Well, I'm pretty much family.
Xander: Yeah. Why don't you come back during the day? Oh, gee, no, I guess you can't.
Angelus: If I decide to walk into Buffy's room, do you think for one microsecond that you could stop me?
Xander: Maybe not. Maybe that security guard couldn't either. Or those cops... or the orderlies... But I'm kinda curious to find out. You game?
Angelus: Buffy's White Knight. You still love her. It must just eat you up that I got there first.
Xander: You're gonna die. And I'm gonna be there.
Killed by Death
received 7.9% of 89 votes

Giles: Yes, let's not jump to any conclusions.
Buffy: I didn't jump. I took a tiny step, and there conclusions were.
received 7.8% of 77 votes

Angel: Hey. I was wondering when you were coming.
Buffy: I'm not coming back. We're not friends. We never were. And I can fool Giles, and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason. What I want from you I can never have. You don't need me to take care of you anymore. So I'm gonna go.
Angel: I don't accept that.
Buffy: You have to.
Angel: How can...There's gotta be some way we can still see each other.
Buffy: There is: tell me that you don't love me.
Lovers Walk
received 7.6% of 79 votes

Buffy: Mom, I've accepted that you've had sex. I am not ready to know that you had Farrah hair.
Joyce: This is Gidgit hair. Don't they teach you anything in history?
The Witch
received 7.4% of 68 votes

Wesley: Why don't you tell me everything about last night's patrol.
Buffy: Vampires.
Wesley: Yes?
Buffy: Killed 'em.
Bad Girls
received 7.4% of 54 votes

Anya: Men like sports. I'm sure of it.
Xander: Yes. Men like sports. Men watch the action movie, they eat of the beef, and they enjoy to look at the bosoms. A thousand years of avenging our wrongs, and that's all you've learned?
Graduation Day, Part 1
received 7.3% of 109 votes

Xander: So, when you gave him my neck to chew on, why didn't you clock him before he had a chance to clock you?
Angel: I told you. I couldn't make the first move. I had to see if he was buying it or not.
Xander: A-and if he bit me, what then?
Angel: We would've known he bought it.
School Hard
received 6.9% of 58 votes

Jenny: Did anyone ever tell you you're kind of a fuddy-duddy?
Giles: Nobody ever seems to tell me anything else.
Jenny: Did anyone ever tell you you're kind of a sexy fuddy-duddy?
Giles: Well, no. Actually that, that part usually gets left out.
The Dark Age
received 6.9% of 58 votes

Giles: If your identity as the Slayer is revealed it could put you and all those around you in grave danger.
Buffy: Well, in that case I won't wear my button that says, 'I'm the Slayer, ask me how!'
Never Kill a Boy on the First Date
received 6.7% of 90 votes

Giles: Cordelia, have you actually ever heard of tact?
Cordelia: Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass.
Killed by Death
received 6.7% of 89 votes

Buffy: Impulsive? Do you remember my ex-boyfriend, the vampire? I slept with him, he lost his soul, now my boyfriend's gone forever, and the demon that wears his face is killing my friends. The next impulsive decision I make will involve my choice of dentures.
I Only Have Eyes For You
received 6.7% of 89 votes

Eddie: Did you lose your way?
Buffy: Me? Oh, no, no, no - I'm just going to Fisher Hall, which I know is on the... Earth planet. Recently voted "Most Pathetic", uh-huh.
Eddie: Well, I'm lost, and I have a map, so...
Buffy: Ooh, I come in second.
The Freshman
received 6.6% of 105 votes

Buffy: Well, I gotta look on the bright side. Maybe I can still get kicked out of school!
Xander: Oh, yeah, that's a plan. 'Cause lots of schools aren't on Hellmouths.
Willow: Maybe you could blow something up. They're really strict about that.
Buffy: I was thinking of a more subtle approach, y'know, like excessive not studying.
Giles: The Earth is doomed!
The Harvest
received 5.9% of 68 votes

Giles: For God's sake be careful. I mean, uh, I appreciate your efforts to keep the vampire population down until Buffy returns, but, uh... Well, if anything should happen to you and... you should be killed, I should take it somewhat amiss.
Willow: You'd be cranky?
Giles: Entirely.
received 5.6% of 88 votes

Xander: One day I'll have money. Prestige. Power. And on that day they'll still have more.
Reptile Boy
received 5.6% of 54 votes

Angel: Faith, you have a choice. You've tasted something few ever do. I mean, to kill without remorse is to feel like a god.
Faith: Right now, all I feel is a cramp in my wrist, so let me go!
Angel: But you're not a god. You're not much more than a child. Going down this path will ruin you. You can't imagine the price for true evil.
Faith: Yeah? I hope evil takes MasterCard.
received 5.6% of 54 votes

Anya: For a thousand years I wielded the powers of The Wish. I brought ruin to the heads of unfaithful men. I brought forth destruction and chaos for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared and worshipped across the mortal globe. And now I'm stuck at Sunnydale High. Mortal. Child. And I'm flunking math.
received 5.6% of 54 votes

Faith: Miles to go. Little Miss Muffet counting down from 7-3-0.
Buffy: Great. Riddles.
Graduation Day, Part 2
received 5.5% of 109 votes

Cordelia: I can't even believe you. You dragged me out of bed for a ride? What am I, mass transportation?
Xander: That's what a lot of the guys say, but it's just locker room talk. I wouldn't pay it any mind.
What's My Line, Part 1
received 5.2% of 77 votes

Xander: And was there a lesson in all of this? What have we learned about beer?
Buffy: Foamy!
Xander: Good. Just so thatís clear.
received 4.9% of 123 votes

Willow: Bored now.
received 4.9% of 123 votes

Buffy: And you are?
Sunday: Oh, I'm Sunday. I'll be killing you here in a minute or so.
Buffy: You know, that threat gets more frightening every time I hear it.
Guy Vamp: Uh, are we gonna fight, or is there just gonna be a monster sarcasm rally?
The Freshman
received 4.8% of 105 votes

Buffy: It's not his fault. He's 243 years old. He doesn't exactly get the prom.
Willow: But he should. If he...
Buffy: Will, it's okay. You don't have to make him the bad guy.
Willow: But, that's the best friend's job. Vilifying and grousing.
The Prom
received 4.6% of 109 votes

Xander: The band. They're great. They march.
Willow: Like an army. Except with music instead of bullets, and usually no one dies.
Band Candy
received 4.5% of 88 votes

Willow: Well, when I'm with a boy I like, it's hard for me to say anything cool, or, or witty, or at all. I-I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away.
Welcome to the Hellmouth
received 4.4% of 68 votes

Buffy: I think I'll choose to celebrate this one with quiet reflection.
Xander: Where is it written that quiet reflection can't be combined with cake and funny hats?
received 3.8% of 79 votes

Parker: You think I could get a dance with the prettiest girl at the party?
Buffy: And what do I do, just stand here and watch?
The Harsh Light of Day
received 3.8% of 105 votes

Jack: I'm gonna carve you up and serve you with gravy. You piss me off, boy. Now you pay the price. First the eyes, then the tongue. I'm gonna break every one of your fingers.
Xander: You gonna do all that in forty-nine seconds?
The Zeppo
received 3.7% of 54 votes

Angel: Time was, I thought humans existed just to hurt each other. But then I came here. And I found out that there are other types of people. People who genuinely wanted to do right. And they make mistakes. And they fall down. You know, but they keep caring. Keep trying. If you can trust us, Faith, this can all change. You don't have to disappear into the darkness.
received 3.7% of 54 votes

Anya: You know, you can laugh, but I have witnessed a millennium of treachery and oppression from the males of the species. And I have nothing but contempt for the whole libidinous lot of them.
Xander: Then why are you talking to me?
Anya: I don't have a date for the prom.
The Prom
received 3.7% of 109 votes

Buffy: I wasn't gonna use violence. I don't always use violence. Do I?
Xander: The important thing is *you* believe that.
Inca Mummy Girl
received 3.4% of 58 votes

Willow: The Lonely Ones?
Angel: Vampires.
Xander: Oh! We usually call them the nasty, pointy, bitey ones.
Lie to Me
received 3.4% of 58 votes

Buffy: How are you?
Faith: Five by five.
Buffy: I'll interpret that as "good."
received 3.4% of 88 votes

Xander: And on the day the words "flimsy excuse" were redefined, we stood in awe and watched.
received 3.4% of 59 votes

Giles: I was just filling Buffy in on my progress regarding the research of Ascension.
Wesley: Oh. And what took up the rest of the minute?
Giles: Touchť.
received 3.4% of 59 votes

Buffy: I just can't decide on a school right now. I mean... I want to sleep on it, you know, mull it over. Raise 'em up my inner flagpole, see which one I salute.
received 3.4% of 59 votes

Giles: Uh, well, basically the, uh, the She-Mantis assumes the form of a beautiful woman and then lures innocent virgins back to her nest.
Buffy: Virgins? Well, Xander's not a, uh...I mean, he's probably...
Willow: ...gonna die!
Teacher's Pet
received 3.3% of 90 votes

Giles: I've been reading up on my, uh, animal possession, and I cannot find anything anywhere about memory loss afterwards.
Xander: Did you tell them that?
Giles: Your secret dies with me.
Xander: Shoot me, stuff me, mount me.
The Pack
received 3.3% of 90 votes

Buffy: I didn't say I'd never slay another vampire. It's not like I have all these fluffy bunny feelings for them, I'm just not gonna get way extracurricular with it.
Welcome to the Hellmouth
received 2.9% of 68 votes

Harmony (to Spike): I am powerful and beautiful and I don't need you to complete me. And you're mean!
received 2.9% of 68 votes

Willow: Why do demons even come here? I mean, don't they know how bad we are?
Graduation Day, Part 2
received 2.8% of 109 votes

"Here endeth the lesson." The Master in Angel, Spike in Fool For Love, and Buffy at some point.
received 2.4% of 123 votes

Giles: I'm, I'm just gonna stay and clean up a little. I'll, uh, I'll be back in the middle ages.
Ms. Calendar: Did you ever leave?
I Robot, You Jane
received 2.2% of 90 votes

Buffy: You mean besides convince a perfectly nice kid to try and kill me? I don't know. How about mess up all the medical equipment in the world?
Giles: Randomize traffic signals.
Buffy: Access launch codes for our nuclear missiles.
Giles: Destroy the world's economy.
Buffy: I think I pretty much capped it with that nuclear missile thing.
Giles: Right, yours was best.
I Robot, You Jane
received 2.2% of 90 votes

Willow: Buffy's looking at Parker, who, it turns out, has a reflection, so big plus there.
The Harsh Light of Day
received 1.9% of 105 votes

Larry: You and Buffy, you're just friends, right?
Xander: I like to think of it less as a friendship and more as a solid foundation for future bliss.
received 1.7% of 58 votes

Mayor: Angelus, may I call you Angel?
Angel: Well, I'm thinking more along the lines of you calling me Master.
Mayor: Ahh. You know Angelus, attitude may get you attention, but courtesy wins respect.
received 1.7% of 59 votes

Buffy: When he wakes up tell him... I don't know. Think of something cool, tell him I said it.
received 1.6% of 123 votes

Buffy: This... guy. Dark, gorgeous in an annoying sort of way. I figured you two were buds.
Giles: No. The Harvest. Did he say anything else?
Buffy: Something about the Mouth of Hell. I *really* didn't like him!
Welcome to the Hellmouth
received 1.5% of 68 votes

Angelus: Jeez, is it me, or is your heart not in this? Maybe I'll just go home, destroy the world.
Buffy: Well, I think Mr. Pointy'll have something to say about that. Come on. Let's finish this. You and me.
Angelus: You never learn, do you? This wasn't about you. This was never about you. And you fall for it every single time!
Becoming, Part 1
received 1.1% of 89 votes

Riley: We're drawing up a plan for world domination. The key element? Coffeemakers that think.
Buffy: World domination? Is that a good?
Riley: Buffy, we're the government. It's what we do.
received 0.8% of 123 votes

Anya: I love a ritual sacrifice.
Buffy: Not really a one of those.
Anya: To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice...with pie.
received 0.8% of 123 votes

Willow: What about Angel?
Buffy: Angel? I can just see him in a relationship. 'Hi, honey, you're in grave danger. I'll see you next month.'
Willow: He's not around much, it's true.
Buffy: When he is's like the lights dim everywhere else. You know how it's like that with some guys?
Willow: Oh, yeah!
received 0% of 90 votes

Buffy: Okay, Giles, just remember, 'I feel a thing, you feel a thing...' But personalize it.
Giles: Personalize it?
Buffy: She's a technopagan, right? Ask her to bless your laptop.
Some Assembly Required
received 0% of 58 votes

Buffy: I don't take orders. I do things my way.
Kendra: No wonder you died.
What's My Line, Part 2
received 0% of 77 votes

Joyce: Just nothing with horror in it. Or romance. Or men.
Buffy: I guess we're Thelma and Louise-ing it again.
received 0% of 77 votes

Coach Marin: You got some imagination, Missy.
Buffy: Oh, well, right now I'm imagining you in jail. You're wearing a big orange suit, and, oh look, the guards are beating you up.
Go Fish
received 0% of 89 votes

Angel: Milady, you'll find that with the exception of an honest day's work, there's no challenge I'm not prepared to face.
Becoming, Part 1
received 0% of 89 votes

Willow: Hmm, "Buffy." Ooh, scary.
Xander: Someone has to talk to her people. That name is striking fear in nobody's hearts
The Wish
received 0% of 79 votes

[ Poll Archive Index ]

Site Index