Fanfiction: Origin - Part Two
The days plunged deeper into the heart of December, inching closer to Faith’s birthday, to the puppy that she so desperately hoped to receive. Things in the apartment remained in a perpetual state of motionlessness; life went on, but it never really moved. Jesse was gone more than ever before, sometimes leaving Faith by herself for entire days. The hollow feeling in Faith’s stomach continued to grow with every hour, minute, and second she was forced to spend by herself. The television occupied much of her time. She read and reread all her old books. She would stare out the window for hours at a time, wondering where her mother was, wondering if the vampire was out there watching, waiting. Sometimes she would talk to Kelly on the phone, but Kelly’s parents were keeping her busy, and she was rarely at home. Lindsay Matthews had not stopped by or called for nearly a week, and without some kind of contact or comfort from someone, anyone, Faith felt that she would surely go insane. There was only so much she could do inside the apartment, and her always-rambunctious energy level was finding no release. Sometimes she would wake up after an uneasy night’s sleep and find that Jesse had dropped off food, but most times, Faith would have traded the food in an instant just to spend a day with her mother. She set her heart on having a nice birthday, on being able to talk to Jesse for more than a few minutes.
Eventually, the days slowly found their way to December 13th, the day before Faith’s much-anticipated tenth birthday. Faith awoke relatively early, went to go take a shower, and was surprised to find her mother in the kitchen making breakfast. The sight was so unexpected, and so uncharacteristic for Jesse, that Faith stopped walking and couldn’t help her mouth from dropping just a little bit, awed by the implications of having a real breakfast instead of the dreary bowl of cereal that she was so accustomed to. She dropped her small pile of clothes on the carpet, forgetting the shower, and went instead into the kitchen to discover for herself why she was being treated to such a luxury.
“Good morning, mom,” she cheerfully said, announcing her presence with a hopeful face.
Jesse, apparently a bit startled by her daughter’s sudden appearance, almost dropped the plate she was holding, but recovered quickly and returned the greeting. “Hey, Firecracker. You’re up early.”
“Not tired,” Faith responded, pulling out a chair and seating herself at the kitchen table. She rubbed her eyes a bit, getting used to the light streaming through the kitchen window. It looked to be annoyingly sunny outside. “Making breakfast?”
“Thought I’d give you an early birthday surprise,” Jesse said, putting some kind of mix into a bowl and stirring it vigorously. While she stirred, she turned around so she could face her daughter. “Sorry I haven’t been home lately. I’ve been…busy.”
“It’s okay,” Faith answered, easily able to forgive the lonely days when confronted with a non-cereal breakfast. “I read and watched TV, mostly.”
“I thought today we might go to the park or something. Would you like that? You could even bring your little friend Kelly along.”
“Really?” Surprised by the offer, Faith was at a loss for words. “Uh…thanks!” she finally managed, sitting up a bit straighter in her chair.
“Sure.”
And so Faith and Jesse ate breakfast together for the first time in a long while. Faith, true to her word, did not tell her mother about Lindsay Matthews or the vampire, preferring to keep the secret until she could figure out what to do. It was hard for her to lie to Jesse, because she was used to being almost exclusively honest, but Faith was slowly learning that lying could be beneficial; it seemed to solve certain problems, making her life easier. But all of this wasn’t on her mind as she hungrily devoured her pancakes and held conversation with her mom. She was just happy that the day was going to be such a good one. After breakfast—for which Faith thanked Jesse at least twenty five times—the two cleaned the dishes together, and then Faith went to call Kelly to see if she could perhaps come along to the park. But when she dialed Kelly’s number, there was no answer, only a seemingly endless ringing followed by the dull recording on the answering machine.
Somewhat disheartened, Faith hung up the phone. She hadn’t seen Kelly since the night of the attack, and even though they had spoken on the phone a few times since, Faith had been anticipating seeing her best friend again. But she couldn’t let that thought get her down too much, because Jesse was still going to take her to the park, and tomorrow was her big tenth birthday. With renewed spirits, Faith took a quick shower, dressing in some light clothes for the trip to the park. The weather outside had become unusually temperate for a Massachusetts winter, with the snow now completely gone, replaced by a brisk, dry breeze. Wanting to make sure that she didn’t overdress, she chose a purple t-shirt and some raggedy blue jeans, perfect clothing for running around the park.
Jesse led Faith down the stairs and outside to the street, where things were continuing as they always did, a never-ending cycle of life that stopped for nothing. The sun, perhaps an hour away from its apex, was hurling its light downward, causing bright reflections to glint off passing cars and street lights. Faith squinted against the abnormal glare, almost wishing that the sky would cloud over and release some of the powdery snow that was typical of a December in Boston. But it didn’t really matter; whatever the weather, she was being taken to the park, and that was the important thing. Unlike times past, mother and daughter did not hold hands anymore. They walked side by side, with Faith always leading by just a small amount, her inexhaustible well of energy giving her the fuel to keep in front of Jesse’s longer strides. They exchanged comments as they walked, pointing to things or smiling when something was particularly pleasant or funny. Avoiding the alleys, Faith stuck to the main streets, forcing Jesse to follow suit.
Obviously, the vampire wouldn’t be able to come outside in this scorching light, but Faith preferred to stick to the sidewalks all the same. Her tiny gold necklace was tucked away safely under her shirt, and Jesse had not even noticed it, having ceased to closely scrutinize her daughter some months back. Eventually, they reached the park, and Faith immediately bolted straight for the playground, leaving Jesse to find a bench to sit on.
From there, the day uneventfully meandered onward, a peaceful afternoon in a city filled with unrest. The lazy breeze picked up some scraps of litter here and there, kicking them playfully around the park, an invisible essence that was everywhere and nowhere all at once. Up in the azure sky, the sun continued to glitter, unknowingly casting unwanted light on dying grass and rusted playground equipment. Jesse watched her daughter dart from place to place, from swing set to jungle gym, from monkey bars to the slide.
In her heart, Jesse could see her own life deteriorating, and she knew that one day it would come crashing down, leaving Faith to pick up the pieces on her own. Times were changing. Alcohol kept evolving into a larger and larger priority, and to pay for that, Faith, and the apartment, Jesse had begun making some questionable decisions in her personal life. Not yet thirty years old, but feeling at least twice that, Jesse found little pleasure in the park’s scenery, and even though she tried to keep up her enthusiasm for spending time with Faith, she was ultimately unable to do so.
After an hour and half, Jesse sighed to herself and stood up, calling to Faith that it was time to leave. A little tired after going around in circles for so long, Faith still managed to cull up enough energy to run back to her mother. Again, she thanked Jesse profusely for taking her to the park, content with how the day had progressed.
On the way home, Jesse stayed mostly silent, thinking over her monetary situation. Chris was unable to leave the base until around the very end of December, and until then, Jesse would have to find some other way to make money. She had never been able to hold a steady job, getting fired from one place after the other for stealing money or habitual absence. Looking down at Faith, the daughter she had never asked for, she wondered if her life would have turned out differently if she hadn’t gotten pregnant so long ago, but she concluded that it probably wouldn’t have changed much. As it was, Faith was the only thing keeping Jesse from completely destroying herself at this point. With some semblance of responsibility, Jesse occasionally reigned in her habits and for a few days or hours, sometimes becoming the parental role model that Faith needed.
But most times, the habits and the addictions overruled any sense of duty towards her daughter. And it was only getting worse.
Reaching the building, they climbed the stairs, went down the hallway to apartment 314, and opened the door. Faith literally threw herself on the couch, somewhat exhausted after her abnormally busy activities, while Jesse locked up and went into her room. Not content to stay on the couch for long, Faith got up and turned on the TV, flicking the dial over and over until she realized that nothing decent was on and decided to watch the rather uninteresting afternoon news instead. Without prompting, she left the tiny living room and went into the kitchen, making herself some macaroni and cheese for lunch. She half-listened to the newscasters, but they weren’t saying anything interesting: traffic jams downtown, a new storm heading in, the usual random assortment of murders and other such crimes.
After a quarter hour had passed, Jesse came out of her room as Faith was eating lunch at the kitchen table. She had a small black bag with her, filled with something that Faith couldn’t see. Figuring it was nothing important, she turned her attention back towards the meal and shoveled another spoonful into her mouth.
“I have to go out for a few hours, Faith,” Jesse said, trying to straighten her hair with her free hand and only partially succeeding. “You’ll be all right here?”
“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” Faith replied, chewing on some noodles as she spoke. She managed to tear her eyes away from the steaming plate of macaroni to look at her mother. “Where are you going?”
An uncomfortable look passed over Jesse’s features, and she turned her eyes away from her daughter’s piercing gaze. When she spoke a few seconds later, she seemed uncertain. “I’m going to…um…going out with some friends,” she said, hoping that Faith would believe the lie. Usually her daughter didn’t ask questions like that because Jesse was never around to be asked, but this time, Faith had her trapped. “We’re going to lunch.”
“Oh.” Faith didn’t look away immediately, but when she finally did, Jesse felt relief wash over her. “Have fun.”
“I will,” Jesse said, already on her way out the door. She gave a quick wave and then the door closed, leaving Faith by herself once again.
Faith wasn’t so easily fooled by her mother, and she was quite aware of the fact that Jesse was not going out to eat lunch, as she claimed. Naiveté was something that Faith had lost and could never recover. What most children saw as reality, Faith saw as a foggy dream, a dream that she very much desired to leave behind. But it didn’t matter. Her memories and her experiences were imprinted on her forever, and the only way to go now was forward. The past was dead. So she quietly finished up her lunch and cleaned up after herself, still unconsciously listening to the newscast on the TV. Afterward, she tried to find something more interesting to watch on TV, something that would perhaps hold her interest and get her mind away from the thoughts that were always seeking to creep around her mental defenses, but the television was as empty as the apartment, filled with nothing but fake personalities and abstract colors.
The minutes managed to slowly claw their way into hours. Day turned to dusk, and Faith watched the change from her bedroom window, seeing headlights in the streets and people on the sidewalks. In the brutal twilight that poured its way into her eyes, Faith stood and stared as the outside world left her behind. Just one little girl lost in a world that was too big. Unable to stand the silence any longer, she turned on her small stereo, not caring what station came through, only that some sort of sound would chase away the eerie absence of life in the apartment, and then she resumed her place at the window. She watched the people, and her eyes eventually focused on one man in particular, striding easily down the sidewalk at an unhurried pace. Nothing about him seemed out of the ordinary; to Faith, he was simply a way to pass the time, to make the minutes blur. She watched him run across the street to the opposite sidewalk, and then he stopped suddenly, cocking his head a little to the side as if something had caught his attention. Slowly, he turned his head around and regarded Faith’s building. His gaze climbed higher and higher, until he appeared to be staring directly into Faith’s window. And that was when she saw his eyes.
His yellow eyes.
Frozen in place, Faith had no choice but to stare back. And the two stood like that, a child leveling her gaze at a vampire’s inhuman face. Without warning, Faith saw the vampire’s face change into that of a normal man. The yellow eyes disappeared, along with the evil grin, and then he was gone, disappearing into an alley. With her breath clouding up the window, Faith stepped away shakily and went to sit on her bed, scared of the implications of what had just occurred. As if it wasn’t bad enough that the vampire now knew where she lived, he could also apparently disguise himself as a normal human in order to move freely through the city. She unconsciously grabbed the cross hanging from her neck, rubbing its smooth golden surface between her tiny fingers. The vampire couldn’t hurt her as long as she stayed inside, and that was exactly what she intended to do. It was still early in the evening, but she had lost all taste for staying awake and dealing with the shadows cast by her mind. Eager for the oblivion of sleep, she quickly washed up, turned off the lights in the apartment, wondered why her mother hadn’t come home yet, and tucked herself into bed. Lying in the darkness by herself, Faith conjured up horrible images of burning eyes and flickering demons before she was finally granted the release of falling asleep.
The next morning, Faith awoke with a start, snapping upright and sending her covers flying to the ground. She frantically looked all over her room to make sure that she was completely alone, and then she began taking deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. The vampire had shown up in a nightmare, once again chasing her through the dark alleyways of the city. She had been without her necklace and without her holy water, completely defenseless as the he shoved her to the ground and bared his fangs…
Shaking herself loose from the memory, she got off the bed and stood up, once more going to the window. It didn’t look to be as sunny as yesterday had been, but there was still enough direct light to force the vampire indoors. At least Faith hoped there was. Thankful that she wasn’t going to be left alone in the dark again, she gathered up the same outfit from the day before and opened her door, not quite ready for another day of absolute boredom. When she stepped into the living room, however, she noticed a box sitting in the middle of the floor, decorated with bright red wrapping paper.
Suddenly remembering that today was her birthday, Faith tossed her clothes aside and rushed to the box, which sat prominently on the floor. It was big, perhaps even big enough to contain the thing that Faith had specifically asked for. There was a tiny note on the top, and she went down to her knees, eagerly grabbing it and reading it as fast as she possibly could. In Jesse’s scribbled handwriting, it said:
Happy Birthday, Firecracker! Sorry I couldn’t be there as you’re reading this, but I had to go out and take care of some business. Maybe when I get back, we can even go out to lunch for your special day. I hope you like your present. Love, Mom.
Placing the note on the carpet, Faith set to ripping off the wrapping paper, anxious with the hope that her mother had fulfilled her birthday wish. As she tore away the last of it, she saw that the box was dented and a bit dirty, as if it had been picked up off the street. Not letting that fact bother her, Faith took off the lid and prepared for a furry surprise, but nothing jumped out. There was no barking. Looking down into the box, she saw some neatly folded clothes at the very bottom.
There was no puppy.
Disheartened, Faith reached into the box and slowly removed her tenth birthday present: a new outfit that consisted of black pants and a dark blue long-sleeved shirt. There was nothing else in the box. After a few minutes of sitting on the floor with her present in total silence, Faith left the box where it was and half-heartedly walked into the bathroom, dragging her new outfit forlornly behind her.
She slowly closed the door, turned on the shower, then sat down on the ground and cried.